How long before you fall in love in a relationship

[AnneBowling]

That's the question really. I've been seeing a chap for nearly three months, and we get on well, but I don't think I'm falling in love yet. We've not had sex yet, but we've been sexual IYKWIM

I posted before that with his work, we're struggling to see each other (maybe once a week), so when we do see each other, it's a little as if we need to regain a little of the ground we lost since last time.

Fair enough one might say, it's only three months, but I'm a little worried I'm not "feeling it"

[minipie]

Three months, seeing him once a week, so you've seen each other 12 times? Maybe 20 times maximum?

I certainly wouldn't be falling in love with someone after only that amount of time together. I know friends who do, but they often turn out to have been "mistaken" after they get to know the guy better (which I think means they put him on a pedestal too early and then got disappointed). Give it more time. If you are enjoying his company, that's great.

[londonartemis]

HOw much are you in touch in between meeting up>
Are you txting and e-mailing and joking on the phone. You don't have to see the person all the time to fall in love with them.

[ZZZenAgain]

well you may not be feeling very attached but is the chemistry there?

[minipie]

That's a fair point london I hadn't thought about contact between meet ups.

Still, though, three months is really not very long.

[AnneBowling]

We are emailing and texting most days, talking on the phone not so much (he's a doctor, and has been working night shifts, etc and so not so easy to call)

There's chemistry in that I fancy him, and we laugh together.

[EnnisDelMar]

Well, if you fancy him you're doing Ok. I was about to ask - is there anything that puts you off, or you're trying to ignore?

If not - just go easy. I'd say no sex yet is a very good sign because he's still around and clearly sees you as more than a quick fling.

[bigTillyMint]

I think you will know whether he's right for you once you have sex.

But then, I've never been very good at waiting

[AnneBowling]

This might seem a little silly, but I'm a little scared of having sex, because I think once we do, then we've crossed a boundary (I know some people are more casual then I am about this)

[AnneBowling]

What I mean by that above, is that in the past, I've fallen in love before having sex before, rather than the other way around

[EnnisDelMar]

Yes absolutely, fall in love first.

It's the best way.

[AnneBowling]

Ennis, that is definitely my philosophy (not saying it's the only way or best)

[droves]

I fell in love with DH before i was with him, he was a friend.(i was seeing someone else )

I didnt "fall in love" with ex-h as such , i loved him after dating him for 6 months or so....it just wasnt "there" iykwim.

I also have had a boyfriend that i cared about , but didnt love ,
a boyfriend i had major crush on ,
and a boyfriend who i thought was creepy after a bit and couldnt wait to get rid of.

If "something" isnt there after a few months its not a good sign imo.Dont sleep with him, it wil be crap.

BACK OF THE QUE TIME FOR BF !