We have 2 dcs (4 and 2) I am a SAHM. My DH is self-employed.
He has always been sporty and very involved in a local team. It means training two evenings a week, match and sometimes extra training at the week end. Regardless of what is happening at home/work etc he is committed and goes if at all possible.
My problem lies with the fact that he is self-employed and never turns down work. At the moment he has a contract for Mon-Fri for the next 4 months. He has also agreed to work extra hours one night a week for the duration of the contract and this weekend is working Saturday as well. He also has another night course in the pipeline.
When I look at all this it means with work and training he will be gone 4 nights a week and playing a match every weekend.
So. it's work - the whole family benefit from the money he makes - I get that but we also benefit from him being here sometimes but he never discusses the options with me.
And the sport - he is talented and has been playing since he was 5 - how can I ask him to give it up?
But it leaves me with no free time and very little time for the 4 of us to do things together and I feel trapped.
We have MIL living near us but she works and other than that we have very little in the way of family support.
When I moan to my mother about it she says I am being unfair. He is so hard working etc etc etc and I feel like shouting 'what about me?'
I have considered paying someone to mind the dcs but what I really want is for DH to spend time with us. It seems ludicrous for us to pay for childcare when the simple solution is for him to make some time.
I don't really know what I am asking but what do you think?
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I get so upset by DH's attitude - but maybe I am wrong. Opinions welcome.
8 replies
suiledonne · 22/10/2010 16:29
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