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Friends husband left her-what rights does she have?

4 replies

Mirage · 24/08/2005 14:17

My poor friend is reeling,her husband has told her that he doesn't love her anymore.They have a 1year old ds & her husband says he stopped loving her before their ds was born.He has been horrible to my friend & moved out of the family home & won't even see their son.

She is coming around to see me tomorrow & if possible,I'd like to find out what her rights are regarding support for her ds & whether she can stay in the house.I'm assuming he has told her that it will have to be sold,as she is getting it valued tomorrow-however,I don't know if he can force her to sell.There certainly won't be enough proceeds after a sale for her to buy somewhere else-so what can she do?

If anyone can help me out with some advice,I'd be very very grateful.Also,what can I do to help her?

Thanks.

OP posts:

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NotActuallyAMum · 24/08/2005 15:36

Sorry to hear about your friend, she must be devastated. You probably feel a little helpless at the moment because you don't feel as if you can do anything to help, but it will be a big help to her if you just listen to her, give her advice if she asks for it, let her cry on your shoulder and just generally be there for her

As for the house, I'm no expert but if they are going to get divorced I believe it will eventually have to be sold, though she should I would imagine be able to stay there in the meantime as long as she can afford to. As I understand it when a couple divorce any assets have to be divided, this includes any pensions regardless of whether they are his or hers but it will be up to their solicitors to decide on exactly what happens. She will certainly be entitled to some form of regular payment from her husband for their son, but as to how she goes about getting this if he refuses to pay, I really don't know

Sorry - I know this doesn't really help, and your friend probably won't want to talk about solicitors at the moment but I really do think she needs some professional advice on this - perhaps you could go along with her for some moral support?

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Kayleigh · 24/08/2005 15:40

Citizens advice will help her if she doesn't want to see a solicitor yet

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Sparks · 24/08/2005 16:07

She (or you) might also want to contact Gingerbread the organisation for lone parents. They have a helpline 0800 018 4318.

It's not true that the house will have to be sold. If the house is in joint names, it cannot be sold unless both of them agree, or if her husband gets a court order for it to be sold. OTOH, the court could issue an order for mother and son to stay in the house, if it is deemed to be in the best interests of the child.

He has voluntarily left the family home. Your friend and her son is to stay put.

I think the best thing you can do to help her is what you are already doing - to be there for her and support her.

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Mirage · 25/08/2005 21:07

Thanks everyone.I will pass on all the advice/phone numbers ect.She came to see me today & told me the full story.Apparently he is still living in the house & is being horrible to her-abusing her verbally & refusing to discuss anything sensibly.He told her that she can leave if she doesn't like it{shock}

He is an arse & said that he only got married & had ds,because it was what 'everyone' expected of him!

My friend is going to agree to sell the house & is buying somewhere else with the help of her dad.She says the marital home has to many memories & can't afford to keep it.

I have offered babysitting services for when she needs to see solicitors ect & told her that she can come over to my house whenever she wants.I just wish there was more I could do........