Can I PLEASE just have 13 minutes? 13 measly minutes to myself to listen to The Archers?

(980 Posts)
PseudoBadger Tue 11-Mar-14 20:16:12

Come and enjoy awkward dinner parties galore!

AllMimsyWereTheBorogroves Tue 11-Mar-14 20:19:01

Marking place!

GypsyFloss Tue 11-Mar-14 20:20:56

And me

ComposHat Tue 11-Mar-14 20:23:34


WipsGlitter Tue 11-Mar-14 20:24:00

Me too. Missed tonight's episode - catch up later or tomorrow.

& - just a sec - where did he go to get the steaks? It couldn't have been the village shop - he'd have been stuck for hours on the Borchester by-pass if he went anywhere else

I reckon he keeps a meat cleaver in the car & slaughtered one of Brookfield's Herefords

ZeroSomeGameThingy Tue 11-Mar-14 20:30:25

Well I was spluttering the word "Bastard" all through supper with some tolerant relatives who didn't mind the radio in the background. And all I wanted to do was rush for my phone to come and swear at Rob here. He was appalling.angry

Oh I love a new thread. (And new freaky people who listened at university. It really wasnt just me!) Thanks Pseudowine

Thanks for the new thread

GypsyFloss Tue 11-Mar-14 20:33:20

These threads have really grown haven't they. I love seeing new people coming in and admitting their addiction grin

Bluestocking Tue 11-Mar-14 20:33:32

Hello, you two!
That epi was really disturbing. The subtle putdowns masquerading as supportive (comparing her hair to a Yorkshire terrier, vetoing the stirfry at the last moment) and stopping her from going to Henry were straight out of the EA playbook, which I'm all too familiar with from the Relationships section of MN. Not sure I would have heard it the same way without the MN education.
At least Ian sees him for the horror he is, although I'm hoping this is played out over the right timetable for real EA, rather than Helen coming to her senses in a fortnight.

WhatSheSaid Tue 11-Mar-14 20:44:23

Marking place

Eastpoint Tue 11-Mar-14 20:55:37

Sorry I just posted on the old thread saying how annoying he was telling her to sort out her hair. What a pain and how rude.

JollyGolightly Tue 11-Mar-14 20:58:18

"you're a good little cook"


BonaDea Tue 11-Mar-14 20:59:58

I missed it. What is Rob the Nob up to now please?

ZeroSomeGameThingy Tue 11-Mar-14 21:00:08

Bluestocking just reading it is putting up my heart rate again. I was furious.

And it is so well written. I found myself examining every sentence he uttered because almost any of them, in isolation, might be just a man being a bit of a pain, or clumsy, or unwittingly overbearing. But all together - and combined with what's gone before - it was so insidious, and threatening and horrifying and and and...

angry again.

bringonyourwreckingball Tue 11-Mar-14 21:02:47

"you're a good little cook' had me swearing at the radio in a manner most inappropriate for when the kids are still around. He is such a bastard. Surely to goodness Ian will tell her what a cock he is. Surely.

Primadonnagirl Tue 11-Mar-14 21:03:43

And I hope the scriptwriters don't just suddenly drop this storyline like they often do..what could happen next??? Maybe he beds Pat ...Tells Jess he is the victim of domestic violence at the hands of Helen..gets his hands on Helen's money definitely..

PseudoBadger Tue 11-Mar-14 21:03:49

Poor poor Henry sad That's it, she's already chosen Rob over him sad

BonaDea Tue 11-Mar-14 21:06:00

Please tell me. hmm

Redcliff Tue 11-Mar-14 21:09:31

Great title badger ! Good point re the stakes - I did think there was a big supermarket nearby which formed a story line many moons ago.

TypicaLibra Tue 11-Mar-14 21:17:10

As I listened, I was fairly sure wondered if Rob had taken away the mid-sleeper steps so Henry couldn't get down.

Rob's EA is being depicted really well - some episodes he seems reasonably normal, then there are hints of a short fuse and other times indications of simmering menace. He plays with us listeners (Is he EA ... oh maybe I'm wrong, no he definitely is) just the same as a new partner gets sucked in, has vague doubts, then is reassured, all the while becoming more and more insecure .....

Well done on this scripties!

ZeroSomeGameThingy Tue 11-Mar-14 21:18:19

Bonadea can you really not get to iPlayer before Sunday? It really was one of those things you need to hear rather than have reported....

PseudoBadger Tue 11-Mar-14 21:19:39

Definitely worth a listen Bona

cryhavoc Tue 11-Mar-14 21:19:58

I've lurked on these threads for ages, am joining in this time.

I'm a bit worried about the Brookfield lot. When Daveeeeed was telling Kenton how much he loves his life the other day, I was reminded of Nigel telling Daveeeeeed a similar thing.

Up on the roof.

This sent alarm bells ringing that all the Peaky Ruth stuff is a red herring, and something terrible might happen to David. I like David.

Lomaamina Tue 11-Mar-14 21:22:32

Over here we're wondering if Hellin will have the scales fall from her eyes when rob has a swipe at Henry. It seems as she'll take any abuse from him. As for the breathless 'what a wonderful evening'! She clearly hasn't a clue. And how dare he forbid her from going to Henry. How on earth would he know?

NearTheWindymill Tue 11-Mar-14 21:27:45

Well Ian picked up on plenty of other stuff about rotten Rob but he didn't pick up on him telling her to leave Henry. I was waiting with bated breath for that. Haven't caught up with the Archers for a long long time. Used to listen on Sunday mornings and then had children!

PseudoBadger Tue 11-Mar-14 21:32:51

My mind often returns to Jess confronting Helen. She said "you've got no idea what you're getting yourself into" or similar. Was that a warning? However I don't think that Rob was as abusive to Jess as he could be to Helen, something about the way she threw the party regardless of his views, and she often took the piss out of him - she was apprehensive of him but not scared. So Rob is escalating.

Panzee Tue 11-Mar-14 21:37:22

Wow, new thread already!

Minimammoth Tue 11-Mar-14 21:39:33

Last thread seemed to have kicked me off, it stopped appearing on 'I'm on' I have missed at least a week of TA. So thanks for keeping me clued up. Personally I can't bear a long drawn out agony theme, I find it really winds me up, so I do hope H sees the light soon, myself.

TallGiraffe Tue 11-Mar-14 21:41:43

That was one of the most disturbing episodes I've ever heard. So well written!

ButterscotchClouds Tue 11-Mar-14 21:49:34

The line that really raised my blood pressure was when Rob was commenting on Hellin having had enough to drink and he said something like "little Miss Giggly" - what a total arse.

woollyjo Tue 11-Mar-14 21:50:31

The kids got thrown into bed and the briefest of stories tonight so I could listen. I really need a reality check, use the iPlayer and be a better mum!

Icimoi Tue 11-Mar-14 22:06:33

So glad Ian and Adam have seen Titchy for what he is. Now they need to get together with Krusty and plot something subtle to make Titchy show himself up for what he is. Or maybe they can go and talk to Jess and discover that she has no intention whatsoever of giving him a divorce.

JollyGolightly Tue 11-Mar-14 22:13:34

woolly my children think it's a massive treat to listen to the archers at bedtime! Bedtime story happens after.

CuttedUpPear Tue 11-Mar-14 22:21:27

I do like the imagery of everyone ignoring/dismissing their DCs so they can sit down and listen to Titchy Nob telling Hellin to ignore/dismiss Henry... and then coming on here to judge him! grin

Rob DID get hold of those steaks quickly didn't he?
We haven't heard from Jess in a while have we?
Mmm yum yum......

pasbeaucoupdegendarme Tue 11-Mar-14 22:24:45

I'm quite worried for Helen and Henry now sad Don't like her and feel very iffy about Henry (for arriving so quickly when my own dc was taking a loooong time to get cooking...). However, I get absolute shivers about RobNob and wouldn't wish him on anyone.

How cheeky was Jennydahling mentioning Jess to him?!! Good on her!

stilllearnin Tue 11-Mar-14 22:33:21

Well! On A Tuesday I fly out the door to yoga in a most un-om way so that I can listen to the Archers in the car (and sit and wait til the class starts!). I mistimed it tonight and caught the end! Woe! But how completely satisfying that Ian and Adam sussed Rob. Can't see Ian keeping that to himself for long.

What's your take on Helen's confidence in her parenting? I think that although she is a bit wishy washy at most things - she hasn't been with Henry so far. You git, Rob - is there anything she does right?

PseudoBadger Tue 11-Mar-14 22:38:44

Helen is feeling insecure in her parenting as she is without her parents' guidance for the first time. With Pat and Tony she would have said "I'll go to him" (or ideally they'd go for her!!) and they would have agreed.
She wants Rob to agree with her and when he doesn't 1) she doesn't want to piss him off 2) she doesn't want Henry to ruin their evening 3) it must mean that he knows more about parenting than she does so he must be right.

Selks Tue 11-Mar-14 22:39:08

marking place smile

poor Henry tonight sad

ErrolTheDragon Tue 11-Mar-14 22:41:20

>How cheeky was Jennydahling mentioning Jess to him?!! Good on her!

I missed that.

I predict the next thing will be that Henry, who up till now has enjoyed Wob the daddy figure will rightfully resent the cuckoo in the nest and start behaving like a real 3 yo .... poor lad.sad

OddFodd Tue 11-Mar-14 22:44:16

Urgh - DS was doing some very noisy water play in the room and mouthing questions/comments at me with A VERY BIG MOUTH rather than just leaving me in peace. But I got the gist and I'm too freaked out by it to listen again before bed.

Poor Henry sad I want Ian to get together with Kirsty and stage an intervention

stilllearnin Tue 11-Mar-14 22:46:33

Just listened to the rest of it - wow the menu thing was really awful and very well done. Pseudo as usual, you have it!! Although I'm not sure Ian and Adam have quite called it by its name yet - just a bit ' caveman' hmmm. I think it'll be Kirsty that really susses Rob, based on info from the others. Although I am consistently wrong it seems!

PseudoBadger Tue 11-Mar-14 22:54:42

Personally I think that there is a danger that Kirsty will write Rob off as unlikeable and stop listening when Helen talks about him. She'll miss subtle things that Helen says.
Ian - he'll confront Helen and this will drive her away. Result - she is alone.

twojumpingbeans Wed 12-Mar-14 06:31:56

Am a lurker and very occasional poster on these threads.. I get up at FIVE AM every day (apart from Sundays of course..) so I can listen on I player in the bath. 13 measly minutes to myself a day..

Little Miss Giggly?!? What a dick.

northender Wed 12-Mar-14 06:36:36

Agreed, was a horrible episode, brilliant but v creepy. Glad Ian has seen the dark side, probably realistic how easily Adam dismissed it.
My dd insists on listening too which is good in one way but then last night I was constantly interrupted with questions about EA. As I tutted or sighed she'd ask "why was that bad mum?". She's 9!

AboveTheOxbow Wed 12-Mar-14 07:20:56

Couldn't wait for the omnibus and just listened on iplayer. I am now pretty perturbed (not helped by also watching Shetland last night!)

What a horrible man, really wished Ian had smacked him one. Not sure I have the mettel to keep listening- it's turning into a sort of bucolic Sleeping with the Enemy.

All credit to the writers through, brilliantly written and gripping stuff!

GrendelsMum Wed 12-Mar-14 08:08:21

Ooh, that was a cracker - I was thinking of you all. I wondered whether there was going to be some homophobia over the steaks and stir-fry as well ('real men don't eat stir-fry') but Rob seems to have avoided that bit.

Normally Pat would have gone up to Henry, I think.

he's started on her hair, wonder whether rob will drop in a jokey little 'looking a bit chubby' comment at some point (following up with a 'more of you to love' or similar just to confuse her)

guineapiglet Wed 12-Mar-14 08:39:27

I hated the bit about the top knot......ok for a Yorkshire terrier but not the future Mrs Rob Tichener....... I think I would have thrown the semi prepared stir fry over him......well done to Ian for sticking up for said stir fry......

Yes I noticed the comment about Jess' fish kettle....brilliantly passed over by Rob....where is Jess????

...and the comment about the kitchen in The Lodge.....boy does Hellin pick ' em...... the saga with Greg just went on and on and on.....maybe it is Hellin who will end up with PC Gorgeous when he comes to rescue her from Rob (and Jess') evil clutches......and all this for Rob to get on the property ladder via a dead Peggy of course..
...<muses and rubs beard thoughtfully>

OldBeanbagz Wed 12-Mar-14 08:49:16

DH (who's away) phoned after last night to admit that i was right about Rob being a 'bad one'.

It was cringing to listen to and i'm so glad that Ian & Adam saw right through him.

My guess for the celeb is Bradley Wiggins as Ian mentioned he liked cycling (and local football) and then changed his mind about entering Dan's event once he's had a text off Fallon.

ppeatfruit Wed 12-Mar-14 09:04:30

Blimey this thread is on the most active grin. Someone upthread said Ian didn't pick up on the way Titch told Helen not to go to Henry but Ian said "oh he's crying though isn't he?".

Oddly the comment was ignored by Hell and Rob of course

ppeatfruit Wed 12-Mar-14 09:05:35

Sorry congrats on the thread and welcome to the newbies grin

Martorana Wed 12-Mar-14 09:13:56

I don't really think Adam did see through him though, or at least he was prepared to make allowances- it's only Ian, who's always been very emotionally intelligent. I was hoping he would say he'd go to Henry, and find the ladder taken down........

BitOutOfPractice Wed 12-Mar-14 09:17:44

Can I just quietly glow with pride? For being the inspiration for the thread title.

I feel I have truly made it.

I have a confession to make. In recent days I have flirted with another archers forum. I know, I know. In 48 hours I have had a row with one patronising throwback bloke who was telling us all how he admired "working housewives" for running a house while "making a contribution to the household income" (apparently they are nothing short of saints) and been informed that controlling behaviour like Rob's isn't abuse because "some people like to be controlled"

I have left that forum and scurried back here to the warm bosom of sanity that is the MN Archers thread.

Please forgive me my transgression!

By the way, my phone corrected that last sentence to "warm bison" grin

QuietUntil3 Wed 12-Mar-14 09:39:38

Stunned and delighted to find this thread! I've been on here for years (dd1 is 13) and listened to the archers since I was a child (and wasn't allowed to talk for those 13 minutes). I'm reasonably intelligent. Why didn't I put two and two together until now and realise that my two favourite time wasting educational activities could be linked??!

Glad I listened this morning or I may not have been able to sleep last night... Rob just kept coming out with more. I'd thought of a lot of the story ideas on this thread too but not the one about Rob turning on Henry which seems very likely now I think about it. I'd been giving Rob a chance to turn out to be the good guy after all, but not anymore!!!

bonkersLFDT20 Wed 12-Mar-14 09:42:56

Love the title! I like to listen to the omnibus while I'm preparing dinner on a Sunday evening. What fun to play the "how long will I get to listen before I have to pause" game [hollow laugh]

Martorana Wed 12-Mar-14 09:46:13

Ooh, bitouofpractise-shall we go over there en masse and sort them out? They wouldn't know what had hit them!

Martorana Wed 12-Mar-14 09:51:41

So, how many red flags? He made her put Henry to bed early. The menu was wrong, he hair was wrong. She had had enough wine. Too early for pudding then suddenly time for pudding. Kitchen size at The Lodge. "Little Miss Giggly""good little cook" "Henry's got to learn"......Any more?

Was there something about the mashed potato? Must listen again.

Rommell Wed 12-Mar-14 09:55:30

While I agree that Rob is a wanker and EA to boot, this storyline is annoying me because I think that Helen is an awful person, and I don't like being made to feel sympathy for awful people.

ErrolTheDragon Wed 12-Mar-14 09:58:58

>wonder whether rob will drop in a jokey little 'looking a bit chubby' comment at some point

Does he know about the anorexia? If he does then I'd guess he'd avoid that particular button - he'd probably have enough self-interest not to push Helen that way again. Or maybe he would but then control-freak her eating.

good point about his self-interest. he does know about it (when pat warned him off and he said they had no secrets)

i was thinking more about him using her vulnerable points

PseudoBadger Wed 12-Mar-14 10:07:38

Just listened again - Henry also cried whilst she was making the mash and Rob said that he didn't sad
I think Adam found Rob unpleasant (especially after the Lodge comment) but certainly didn't see him as controlling/abusive.
And bless Ian for standing up for the stir fry.
And another interesting juxtaposition with a 'normal' relationship.

PseudoBadger Wed 12-Mar-14 10:10:26

"Your friends are my friends darling" unless they are a threat

boobashka Wed 12-Mar-14 10:17:22

Great new thread - thanks!

I loved/was freaked out by last night's epi but thought the Lodge comment went a bit far even for Titchy.

Another one who shushes her DC for 13 mins pre bedtime. I've taken to taking myself off to listen alone in the study blush <bad mother emoticon>

HumphreyCobbler Wed 12-Mar-14 10:20:37

just listening

SW are doing a great job

HumphreyCobbler Wed 12-Mar-14 10:24:50

Rob "are you looking forward to Tom's stag night"
Ian "I WAS"


Poledra Wed 12-Mar-14 10:27:59

Cor, this sounds good. I haven't listened to the Archers regularly since i changed jobs an eon ago Sid was still alive. I might have to start again...

Rommell Wed 12-Mar-14 10:31:23

Actually, another thing that is pissing me off about this storyline is that not only is Helen a nightmare of a person, but she is also a 'classic victim'. Similar to the gurgling 'Little Mo(ron)' on EastEnders years ago, she is obviously weak to begin with. Storylines like this just bolster the impression that the only people who fall victim to DV/EA etc are those who are somehow damaged, which is far from the case.

I just listened again (missed the fish kettle beginning last night)

Hasn't Adam got a lovely voice?

ErrolTheDragon Wed 12-Mar-14 10:43:50

She's damaged, but with other people (and herself come to that) she's the controlling one so maybe not a totally obvious victim for this.

ppeatfruit Wed 12-Mar-14 11:07:09

Yes I like Adams' voice too TheOne grin I still find it weird that he works with Titch but can't quite see how EA he is.

ZeroSomeGameThingy Wed 12-Mar-14 11:16:28

Good Lord! Pseudo think of another tittle quick - we're going to need it within hours...grin

BitOut - So glad you've seen the error of your ways....

ZeroSomeGameThingy Wed 12-Mar-14 11:17:22


unitarian Wed 12-Mar-14 11:27:39

My bet is that the wedding will be where this plot comes to a head but it would be better if the production team were bold enough to play it out in a realistic timescale.

Interesting that Ian began the evening determined to be open-minded while Adam was more worried about Helen and they had reversed their positions by the end. Adam's slower to anger though.

I think the steak was a nod at homophobia -R implying that 'real men eat red meat' and so forth - as well as being another opportunity to undermine Helen's confidence.

TypicaLibra Wed 12-Mar-14 11:37:31

Stilllearning, I don't know if Ian'll dare let Helen know what he thinks of Rob. When Helen introduced him to her last big passion, Leon, Ian got the measure of him straight away, hesitatingly told Helen (well she did ask him very directly, so couldn't really do otherwise without blatantly lying) and it didn't end well. I expect Helen finally admitted grudgingly to Ian that he was right and she wrong ... but will she remember and acknowledge that he's a better judge of character of her boyfriends than she is?!

GrendelsMum Wed 12-Mar-14 11:46:43

I was thinking about Debbie earlier today, and that the one good thing Brian seems to have managed in life is that he does love Debbie unconditionally - and he seems to have much more time for Debbie than for Kate, Alice and the unspellable one.

ppeatfruit Wed 12-Mar-14 12:02:53

unitarian Great minds about the steaks (i posted the same on the defunct thread grin). "A stir fry won't touch the sides". WTF? So Hell made manly mash to accompany the meat. grin

drspouse Wed 12-Mar-14 12:09:18

Shameless place marking.

Martorana Wed 12-Mar-14 12:12:05

How long before Rob starts detaching Helen from Ian? I'm sure there's homophobia to come.

Toomuchtea Wed 12-Mar-14 12:14:26

I agree - I think he'll start the detach from Ian soon, but how?

MissMilliment Wed 12-Mar-14 12:39:49

Listening to last night now. Battling nausea, particularly the 'I rustled up these steaks because little Helen was going to give us rabbit food' nonsense angry

And yes, I reckon Henry was tucked up in bed very very tight with the ladder removed.

Songbird Wed 12-Mar-14 12:46:15

You've all said what I wanted to say, so I am marking my place. That was pure excruciating gold! I hope Ian approaches this gently, or she'll go on the defensive and start avoiding him.

stilllearnin Wed 12-Mar-14 12:49:42

Hmm. The homophobia is a bit obvious though. If someone is saying stuff like that about your best friend, it's very easy to take them to task on it. Rob has to keep it ambiguous. Henry will start getting clingy and Hel will find herself agreeing to the ladder!

Martorana Wed 12-Mar-14 12:56:01

Might Ian possibly become a bad influence on Henry?

MissMilliment Wed 12-Mar-14 13:04:19

Sadly, Rob is clever. I agree with other posters that for him to use homophobia is too obvious. He'll pick a fault of Ian's that Helen has to admit is true, then play on it as a distancing tactic. Or engineer an argument where Ian (who can be manipulated into being hotheaded) says something about Rob or Helen that can be taken as insulting in some way so Helen will cut herself off from him.

I love and hate this storyline!

WhatWouldFreddieDo Wed 12-Mar-14 13:15:16

Possibly - or perhaps Hell will wonder aloud about A and I babysitting and Rob-bastard will suggest it's inappropriate? grin

All sorts of lovely possibilities - looking forward to tonight's episode.

WipsGlitter Wed 12-Mar-14 13:18:35

Listened on catch-up, it is very well done. The comment about the kitchen at the lodge shock and the comment about her hair, it's so controlling and manipulative, but Helen is just happy to have a man so she can't see any of it.

it's very cleverly done because as with RL abuse the early stages are (deliberately) hard things to pin down and possible to explain away or rationalise if you want to (or if you are generally an arse, as evidenced by bitoutofpractice's experience of Another Forum)

SomewhereBeyondTheSea Wed 12-Mar-14 13:23:35

Another one already? Wow!

AllMimsyWereTheBorogroves Wed 12-Mar-14 13:24:07

Ian smokes. Could that be the bad influence Henry needs to be protected from?

stilllearnin Wed 12-Mar-14 13:28:39

It'll will boil down to that old chestnut: your friends don't want you to be happy etc.

Now I'm off to train for Dan and Fallon's sport relief course. What do you mean 'it's only pretend?!'

one of my friends is in an emotionally abusive relationship but i say much less than i think because she has cut off anyone who has voiced their true opinion. many people have lost patience with her, understandably tbh, but i hate to think of her completely isolated

will be interesting to see how ian and adam handle their concerns

BitOutOfPractice Wed 12-Mar-14 13:43:08

I promise not to stray from this warm bison again.

It does my blood pressure no hood at all!

a warm bison for the lonely cow...

ppeatfruit Wed 12-Mar-14 13:55:10

That's good BitOutOf we'll definitely hold you to that promise and make sure your warm bison stays in its hood grin

Martorana Wed 12-Mar-14 14:00:03

I thought the kitchen at the Lodge comment was a mis step from the script writer- I don' think he would have said that.

Scuttlebug Wed 12-Mar-14 14:30:42

Just caught up on I player...he is definitely going to turn out to be a total rat! Brilliant episode!

Also does anyone foresee a relationship between Fallon and Dan? What's the age gap? Archers mrs Robinson in the making?

ppeatfruit Wed 12-Mar-14 14:31:48

Ah but Titch is showing off and being the alpha male with Adam and Ian.Remember the comments about being captain and head boy and the s sports? That's what made Ian competitive about joining Daniel's sport relief thing.

JessieMcJessie Wed 12-Mar-14 14:50:37

Martorana I agree. It was shoehorned in and I was disappointed that it was the final straw for Ian to go ballistic. Even worse was the random comment from Helen about how what she loved about Rob was them working side by side or some such nonsense. I am still pleased that the dinner happened and that now we have clear outrage from Ian but I am afraid I disagree with those saying how well done it was. Could have been much more subtle.

TheRaniOfYawn Wed 12-Mar-14 14:58:48

I'm about a week behind and must listen listen listen to the podcasts and catch up.

BitOutOfPractice Wed 12-Mar-14 15:18:50

How else does a bison stay warm if not with a hood eh?

ppeatfruit Wed 12-Mar-14 15:28:46


ZeroSomeGameThingy Wed 12-Mar-14 16:09:12

.....And Brenda tonight.

Cup runneth over.grin

BitOutOfPractice Wed 12-Mar-14 16:29:59

Oh oh oh I've just listened to last nights. I have fallen in love with Ian. And oh my god rob really showed his true colours!

StickyProblem Wed 12-Mar-14 17:29:30

Honestly last night's gave me cold shivers. Poor Helen - she doesn't pick any of it up! There's nothing Rob didn't stick his mark on. And poor little Henry..... sad

BitOutOfPractice Wed 12-Mar-14 19:00:45

Brenda! <rubs hands>

Gigondas Wed 12-Mar-14 19:12:25

Yay Brenda !

FunLovinBunster Wed 12-Mar-14 19:14:33

Brenda. One of my exes was an Adrian.
He was a shit. grin

ComposHat Wed 12-Mar-14 19:14:51

Why is Brenda called Brenda? Is it after an elderly relative? She's my age and Brenda is the sort of name a great aunt whose whiskery cheek you'd be forced to kiss at Christmas whiost recoiling from the aroma of lavender, Murray mints and stale urine.

Gigondas Wed 12-Mar-14 19:18:18

True but Roy isn't a lot better for man of his age. Brenda doesn't waste much time as was hitched up with that Russian bloke last I heard tho I remember it ending.

I hope they don't spin the Ruth/health thing out too long as it's dull. Tho may only be plot device to get her living at Brookfield.

Also Jennifer's kitchen- let's have more of that story said no one ever.

ZeroSomeGameThingy Wed 12-Mar-14 19:19:48

But what's wrong with her? Someone please diagnose.hmm

BitOutOfPractice Wed 12-Mar-14 19:25:46

Does Brenda know tom is engaged? I imagine she would expect him to still be crying into the pig swill

OddFodd Wed 12-Mar-14 19:27:05

Compos - weirdly, Brenda is quite a cool name in the US. But I agree that it's very unlikely in rural Borsetshire. I always thought Betty was much older than she really was. But now Betty is cool again

OddFodd Wed 12-Mar-14 19:29:25

I'm so rubbish at typing on my tablet that I write in a sort of abbreviated form. Hopefully you'll be able to make sense of my cryptic post blush

puggle01 Wed 12-Mar-14 19:31:03

scampering after new thread
Yippee if it is Wiggo. Wonder why I guessed him before. I've had a crush on him after reading him complaining that nobody ever asked aftr his wife's cycling career as she had a far harder job than him (as was doing all childcare etc, had to carry suitcases on holiday as he couldn't risk getting injured)

brenda's a couple years older than me and i agree it would have been an odd name to hear for someone that age when i was at school. there was a girl called martha which was considered a bit old-fashioned then, but now is quite fashionable again i think, and perhaps it's in a similar category?

there's a baby brenda in claire in the community

roy is... well i don't really know when that was in fashion

yy pat re jennifer's kitchen - "stfu jennifer, i don't give a shit about your kitchen, my family is falling apart" (paraphrasing)

CuttedUpPear Wed 12-Mar-14 19:43:44

And it was, as it ever shall be, that upon a Thursday the storyline shallst take a dramatic turn. And therefore, upon on Friday, the scribes shallst bring either resolution or cliffhanger to the quivering audience.

Nostropearnuss predicts a Bombshell for Brenda tomorrow grin

AllMimsyWereTheBorogroves Wed 12-Mar-14 19:44:08

A long, long, long time ago, Willie. If ever.

Is Ruth anaemic? Jill has some thyroid- problem in the dim and distant past so one might have expected her to mention that as a contender. But the menopause has to be a strong contender. I have been relatively fortunate with it but I have a friend who has been wiped out for months and after exhaustive investigations it has been confirmed it's the menopause that's causing it. I hope they don't string out this business with Ruth for too long. Also, what's with Ruth suddenly wanting to make Ben's cake? (a) Jill would do it much better. (b) The supermarket-on-the-bypass would do it much better. (c) Ben won't care about it - he is 12, not 5. Any old cake would do.

OMG it is Wiggo!

AllMimsyWereTheBorogroves Wed 12-Mar-14 19:47:55

TA blog

I like Wiggo smile

Maybe Brenda was named after Brenda Lee. Mike & Betty were just about the right generation

GrendelsMum Wed 12-Mar-14 20:01:06

If I was famous the first thing I would do would be to appear on The Archers, acting really badly.

Ideally, I'd have a ONS with Brian in Jenny-Darling's new kitchen.

ZeroSomeGameThingy Wed 12-Mar-14 20:02:51

Yes - the guest appearance just being announced on 8pm R4 news!

OldBeanbagz Wed 12-Mar-14 20:08:21

Much as i don't like to be smug - I told you so!

Even the DC were impressed that Bradley Wiggins is going to be on The Archers. That might be one episode they stay quiet for...

ComposHat Wed 12-Mar-14 20:15:12

So grendel that's how the kitchen draw got broken.

Mind you I would do exactly the same. (appear in the archers if I became famous, not get bent over Jennydarling's Aga) I would love a scene where go out on the piss with Jazzer and Lillian and then proceed to tell each character in the Bull exactly what I tbought of them.

kernowal Wed 12-Mar-14 20:22:51

The Ruth problem comes to a head on Sunday evening, with Daveeed having "a lot to take in" on Monday.

Maybe Wiggo will love it so much he'll ask for a regular guest spot, popping into the Bull to share a pint & talk sausages with Tom, revolutionising music in the church with his mod tunes...

cheminotte Wed 12-Mar-14 20:32:01

Marking my place.

oif Wed 12-Mar-14 20:35:40

Ah ha! Feel like I have just completed a virtual rough and tumble challenge, and can now be fully admitted into the warm bison of the mn TA massive... Having idly wondered this morning if there was a current thread as story lines seemed to be improving, have spent the whole day ignoring dcs and reading through entirety of previous two threads and getting up to date on iplayer. Epic.

So, the mattress-dumper is back in play...

JollyGolightly Wed 12-Mar-14 20:40:23

The Ruth thing is annoying. If my wife/DIL had a history
Of breast cancer and was abnormally tired and pale, I would be making an emergency appointment at the doctor's.
Sorry for weird layout; phone is.misbehaving.

FrumiousBandersnatch Wed 12-Mar-14 20:43:08

I think Ruth's pg, conceived in Budapest...

Rommell Wed 12-Mar-14 20:43:56

Ruth had cancer years ago, didn't she? Maybe ten years ago? I'm sure I'm not making that up.

Anyway, that was my first thought, that it had come back, when they started talking about her being tired. Although then I got pissed off (I often get pissed off with TA) because she didn't immediately go to the dr - surely she would have been instructed to.

Rommell Wed 12-Mar-14 20:45:10

Snap, JollyGolightly. I thought you were scottishmummy there for a moment!

AllMimsyWereTheBorogroves Wed 12-Mar-14 20:46:19

Welcome, Rommell and oif!

Re Ruth and the worrying symptoms - I'd have been camped out at the surgery from opening time but then I suppose I don't have milking, lambing and flytipping to contend with.

Ruth's cancer was before Ben iirc

So when she had exhaustion etc then it was assumed to be cancer again but was Ben instead

I'm guessing this is the same

Maybe it'll be twins [manic laughter]

(More common in late pregnancies after all...)

oif Wed 12-Mar-14 20:54:52

I think these things sometimes only dawn on you slowly - you know, you have to keep thinking, "god, I'm REALLY tired" several times before you realise that's not just normal being tired, or lambing, or winter, or whatever.

And, otoh, with the bc in the background, perhaps they are all reluctant to admit to themselves that they are worried about and voice those fears aloud.

Anyway, I hope she is off to the Dr tout de suite! I hate listening to this storyline as it makes me feel like I have worrying symptoms that need investigation.

cheminotte Wed 12-Mar-14 21:01:13

Not listened to today's yet but Adam made a comment about Rob's behaviour 'going' with the territory' which I understand as being a) that's what straight men are like or b) that's what straight men are like in front of gay men to make a point.

Martorana Wed 12-Mar-14 21:02:19

I think he meant public school boys......

Thing is that with Ben she was within the first 5 years when recurrence/secondaries are more likely

Now she's 13-14 years down the line, it wouldn't be recurrence/secondaries so it wouldn't be relevant to mention it.

WipsGlitter Wed 12-Mar-14 21:05:38

I think she'll be pregnant.

Rommell Wed 12-Mar-14 21:16:34

Thank you for the welcome AllMimsyWereTheBorogroves and actually I should have introduced myself before just leaping in there so thank you for being so welcoming. So, my name is Rommell and I am an Archers listener. I have been listening for decades. In fact, I am so serious an Archers listener that even when I lived abroad I listened - a friend's mum made tapes of the episodes and sent them out to her, and I borrowed them. So there really is no hope for me at all.

Minimammoth Wed 12-Mar-14 21:24:27

Ooo triple pregnancy hit, Helen, Ruth and Kirsty.

Minimammoth Wed 12-Mar-14 21:24:45

And Jess

cheminotte Wed 12-Mar-14 21:25:18

Thanks Martorana that would make sense. I hadn't picked up that Rob was privately educated.

BitOutOfPractice Wed 12-Mar-14 21:36:31

Hello Rommell, you'll find the bison here to be particularly warm.

oif I often wonder if it's the lambing that made me tired. Then I remember I live in suburban Essex and it's more likely the Sauvignon Blanc from last night1 wink

Martorana Wed 12-Mar-14 21:40:09

Either he or Adam mentioned Sherbourne - can't remember which.

yes i couldn't work out which mentioned sherborne, it was too quick

PseudoBadger Wed 12-Mar-14 21:46:58

It was Adam I think

JollyGolightly Wed 12-Mar-14 21:57:12

Ah, Sherborne. That explains a lot, according to DH who doesn't like the archers but does hail from Dorset.

Hello Rommel. I am actually both Scottish and a mummy, with a habit of spreading full stops like confetti, but there the similarities end, I suspect.

yes i have relatives who went to sherborne wink

GypsyFloss Wed 12-Mar-14 22:03:02

So what did I miss? Do I need to listen or was it a filler session?

Primadonnagirl Wed 12-Mar-14 22:06:22

Is Ian a different actor? His voice sounded different though TBH I haven't trusted anyone is who they say they are since they switched Tony..

JollyGolightly Wed 12-Mar-14 22:07:05

gypsy listen, of.course!

AllMimsyWereTheBorogroves Wed 12-Mar-14 22:08:44

Brian, Adam and somebody called Charles Collingwood all went to Sherborne. Decades ago the production team sent the posher children to real schools. Will they do that for Ruairi too? He's coming up to the age when he will be moving on to public school.

Gypsy, you should listen. Brenda is back and so is Vicky.

oif Wed 12-Mar-14 22:12:30

grin bitoutof . Just re-read my post and see how slightly nuts it sounds. Especially as I hail from NW London, which isn't a renowned sheep farming area.

V. Long-term Archers fan signing in here! I remember weeping buckets while breast feeding DS when John-Boy got squished by the vintage tractor sad

I SWEAR Radio 4 saved my sanity. Listening to TA was the only thing I had to look foward to every day when DS was a tiny baby and I was on mat leave - apart from the brand new Tellytubbies at smile and a huge spliff

Re. pregnancy - Ruth must be at least 46 though? - born in 1968?

June 68 so she's still 45 atm

oif Wed 12-Mar-14 22:32:07

If it was pregnancy wouldn't they be giving us more typical clues? - morning sickness, big boobs (not sure how they'd wedge this in tbh but trying to think what I noticed first), rushing to the loo a lot…

At the moment, it's just exhaustion, plus looking pale and feeling light-headed, plus a bit of an emotional breakdown. Sounds more to me like anaemia or thyroid problems or - hopefully not - some kind of more serious illness.

maybe ruaridh will go to felpersham boys'

MataHairy Wed 12-Mar-14 22:48:00

<sneaks onto thread>

Anyone have twinges of foreboding about Tony's herd? I think both Tom and Mike have mentioned a lonely, non-eating cow, which they keep contrasting with Tony saying how easy it will be to make his money back. I really hope it doesn't backfire on him it would be un-bull-ievably sad sad

pasbeaucoupdegendarme Wed 12-Mar-14 23:04:05

Oh yes, I twigged the bit about Sherborne and thought it explained a lot ;) I taught in the private sector in that neck of the woods for a while.

YY to twinges of foreboding wrt Tony's cows, too. At least twice I have heard a lonely cow mentioned.

Redcliff Wed 12-Mar-14 23:16:33

Agree re cows (although I thought lonely cow was left over from last heard)
Ruth - I think menopause but guess it could be another sprog on the way. I also don't understand why she hasn't gone to the doctors - I guess she is one of those don't make a fuss types.

Why bring Brenda back into things?

Icimoi Wed 12-Mar-14 23:37:53

I thought it was quite subtle, Jessie. All that "good little cook" stuff is innocuous on the face of it, but put with everything else it mounts up. They are also building up a pattern of Rob making Hellin feel insecure about cooking. He could have mentioned his doubts about the stir fry before he trotted off to borrow the wok, but he deliberately waited until she was part way though preparing it so as to put her right off her stride; it's exactly the same pattern as the business with the tuna. You can see why Jess got so uptight about the catering for that party, and also why Rob got so angry when she wouldn't pay attention to him about it.

avocadoadvantage Wed 12-Mar-14 23:38:44

Hello! New to MN and thrilled to find this thread. Have missed TA lately so not heard Rob's latest behaviour. Ooh he's a wrong 'un. Will have to listen again tomorrow.

ZeroSomeGameThingy Wed 12-Mar-14 23:39:17

Oh, never question Brenda's returns - I have such plans for her!

I too was saddened when the children stopped going to real schools. Really enjoyed the less than subtle fencing between Adam and Rob yesterday. I am dying with curiosity regarding which prep they've sent Ruairi to, so it would be nice if "they" could abandon their terror of elitism and actually name a public school. In fact I don't see why Brian / Jenny couldn't consult MN for current advice; there probably weren't any pre-tests in Adam's day.....grin

Icimoi Wed 12-Mar-14 23:41:09

Sorry, that last post of mine was in answer to something on the previous page, didn't realise we'd got on to another.

BiscuitMillionaire Wed 12-Mar-14 23:52:33

I predict that David is going to get tetanus from the rusty nail he cut his finger on, from the fly-tipped stuff. Then Ruth (oah noah) will be ill at the same time and then they'll really need Gill.

unitarian Thu 13-Mar-14 01:05:36

I too am worried about Tony's cows and that's mainly because I don't want Tom to be insufferably right but I think it's improbable that neither Pat or Tony have noticed if there's something wrong with one of them so I'm hoping that's a false alarm.

And Rob's going to want to get Henry's name down for a boarding school asap - if the poor boy is still alive after no one went to check on him on Tuesday night!

I'm intrigued about Adam's reaction to Rob. It crossed my mind that all that manly steak and sporty talk of public school would have all sorts of connotations for two men who have been similarly educated.
In one sense Rob was accentuating his manliness but did Adam pick up a different signal? He was not as repelled as Ian was.
Was Ian goaded into entering for the challenge because he was aware of a possible threat to his own relationship? (Which is probably reading far too much into a brief episode!)

Dirtybanana Thu 13-Mar-14 04:07:37

They could devote a whole 13min episode to Ruth trying to get through to the Dr's surgery - getting answer phone, then engaged tone, then being told all the daily appointments had gone but now booking for the 3rd April. When she explained she was really worried about her symptoms, she would get a tongue-lashing from the surly receptionist.

Eastpoint Thu 13-Mar-14 04:12:22

Then she could go t

Eastpoint Thu 13-Mar-14 04:13:26

Then she could go to the doctor & explain how she feels etc in great detail and be told 'Well what do you expect at your time of life?' and be sent packing.

cheminotte Thu 13-Mar-14 06:27:31

Or 'why have you waited so long to come and see us?'

GypsyFloss Thu 13-Mar-14 06:33:41

Ok, I'll endeavour to be in my car as the necessary time.

ZeroSomeGameThingy Thu 13-Mar-14 07:35:48

<<<<<Hugs>>>>> Dirtybanana

Although - only 13 minutes? You don't know you're born!

ppeatfruit Thu 13-Mar-14 07:57:52

Blimey anyone else listen to R2 (i know I've outed myself as a MOR type) BUT they just had a bit of TA where Josh says that Bradley Wiggins is coming to Ambridge!!!! TA is getting everywhere how incestuous is that?

ppeatfruit Thu 13-Mar-14 08:02:32

WRF to Why Brenda?

1. she has family in Ambridge.

2.She has fun news, (a VERY rich boyf. 'cos it's easy to pick up one in London of course!!) (lets hope he's not into EA grin) so a rest from the angst

3. An excuse to bring Vickoi et al back in.

ErrolTheDragon Thu 13-Mar-14 08:05:08

Lurking SWs, please get Tony to check that cow and avert disaster, we want prime Tony Archer organic beef on the menu.

Unitarian - I think you're reading too much into the Adam/Rob interactions - some public schoolboys manage to stay resolutely hetero. grin

BitOutOfPractice Thu 13-Mar-14 08:20:44

Not everyone is on Moany's side. I think it'd serve him right for spending all that money without consulting anyone <grumpy>

Redcliff Thu 13-Mar-14 08:39:34

Ok- think I can see why Brenda now - will wait and see what they do with her.

ZeroSomeGameThingy Thu 13-Mar-14 08:46:39

BitOut - I hear there are other fora.....(ominous dots.)grin

As I want Tony to succeed I'm hoping that now Mike has been brought into the Lonely-Uninterested Cow fold he and Tom might happen upon a life saving diagnosis - just in time to preserve the entire herd. And afterwards Tom will love the cows and become a decent, dutiful son.

unitarian Thu 13-Mar-14 09:46:06

Errol - I'm sure I'm reading too much into it but it was late, I'd had a glass or two!

ppeatfruit Thu 13-Mar-14 10:14:55

Zero I have in my mind a thought about cattle overeating the 'spring' grass and getting ill shock (there's a technical term but I can't remember it). Moany might lose the lot of them if he lets that happen grin sad

is that like horses and laminitis ppeat?

ppeatfruit Thu 13-Mar-14 10:46:00

It could well be Willie i'm showing my ignorance here but I don't know if it applies to cows do you?

ZeroSomeGameThingy Thu 13-Mar-14 10:48:23

They couldn't be so cruel to Tony. Bridge Farm have suffered enough. hmm

mummytime Thu 13-Mar-14 10:50:33

Didn't David already have Tetanus? Or was that Tony?

The fly tipping has to be more significant doesn't it - or maybe just a red herring for us at MN.

[waves at the SW for the Archers]

no idea really ppeat - horses and cows are quite different but it could be the same sort of thing? grin

Martorana Thu 13-Mar-14 11:07:06

Word- I don't want them mixing with the hoi polloi any longer than they have to- I need to ferry them to their real tennis and madrigal singing lessons...........

Martorana Thu 13-Mar-14 11:07:33

Oops, wrong thread!

PseudoBadger Thu 13-Mar-14 11:12:20

Don't worry Martorana, I'm sure I've heard Lizzie say that exact sentence...

Martorana Thu 13-Mar-14 11:25:05


ErrolTheDragon Thu 13-Mar-14 11:58:03

>I have in my mind a thought about cattle overeating the 'spring' grass and getting ill

Sounds familiar - must have cropped up in a Herriot book if not TA (my main sources of agricultural knowledge). But although it's starting to grow early, surely the grass isn't that lush yet?

ZeroSomeGameThingy Thu 13-Mar-14 12:19:48

Fabulous interjection Martorana.

I'm still not pleased with Lizzie for letting the side down re the children's schools.

It's TB, not tetanus - that's what badgers are supposedly responsible for. It's only an issue (I think) for dairy herds, not beef

& grin at Martorana!

oh, Lonely Cow was a possible positive for some illness or other - that's why she had to stay in isolation on the farm when the rest of the herd was sold

whatever it was, the others were clear to go so I don't think that was TB

oh it was TB - I just re-found ponderingthearchers

I used to get her emails, which were great for telling if an epi was worth listening to or not, but she got very very behind & then it didn't seem worth it (& it looks as if she's stopped now - her last post was in October)

ppeatfruit Thu 13-Mar-14 12:36:49

Oh dear this thread is getting a tad confusing hmm what with tetanus and TB being mixed up and martorana's interjection!

BTW it was David who said he's got a current tetanus jab. Was T.B. even mentioned recently??

PseudoBadger Thu 13-Mar-14 12:42:01

Just caught up with last night. Love Vicky's views on that there London, with it's lunch breaks, and crawling with eligible batchelors desperate to get engaged.

Icimoi Thu 13-Mar-14 13:11:09

Borsetshire's climate seems to be around two weeks behind the rest of the country, in that they're still exclaiming over the rain. So I wouldn't have thought the spring grass is a danger yet, though of course it's not impossible that the grass there is can spring several inches out of the ground overnight.


AllMimsyWereTheBorogroves Thu 13-Mar-14 13:29:50

Kernowal said way upthread that the RT says David will 'have a lot to take in' on Monday. I'm now guessing that means Jill gives him a triple helping of everything for breakfast and he will talk all the way through eating it.

Martorana Thu 13-Mar-14 13:34:09

I just love that Timothy Bentink is an actual Earl!

ppeatfruit Thu 13-Mar-14 14:27:03

Yes Psuedo Vicky holds very Jane Austenish views on the "Big Smoke" grin

ComposHat Thu 13-Mar-14 14:59:54

I always imagined David was a big burly lumbering man, looking a bit like the commedian Justin Edwards.

That would fit with the constant eating.

Gigondas Thu 13-Mar-14 15:06:23

Isn't Jill having her op on Monday?

David's eating noises are possibly worse then Helen and rob making out.

she's had it, Gigondas smile

boobashka Thu 13-Mar-14 15:11:28

Agree Gigondas re the eating noises.
Also Roooth seems to be adopting David's enthusiasm/orgasms over Jill's food.

"Aw Jill - sausages as well!!"

there was a bloggy thing about David's eating noises recently - doesn't he actually eat bits of banana?? or something???

anyway I reckon, like with "hello, you two!", the more people comment the more the SWs do it - they are such teases wink

Earl Tim's very own blog

it was Bakewell tart! (I got the first 2 letters right anyway...)

he never gets his own food - it's always brought to him. mind you, wasn't it last time he tried cooking (spag bol?) that ruth nearly had an affair

(may have got cause and effect muddled there wink)

probably not, Willie grin

he hasn't made spag bol on the air again to my recollection!

that's an interesting blog post. i don't actually think it makes for awful radio, but it is something that puts me off the character a bit iyswim

puggle01 Thu 13-Mar-14 15:34:22

I love "hello you two" and Joe's helpful "hello david archer, hello ruth archer"
The fact Brian, David, Tom, Tony et al always ask if the females can make them coffee drives me mad. "any chance of a cup of coffee?" FGS put the kettle on at least!

Halsall Thu 13-Mar-14 15:51:32

The wildly over-enthusiastic responses to Jill's probably quite average food, plus the 'Je t'aime' style heavy orgasmic moaning, implies that Rooooth's everyday fare is even more terrible than we think.

Did anyone else feel their heart sink at the return of Vickoi? I'd forgotten just how appalling she is in the interval of blessed peace while she was away, or at least silent.

ppeatfruit Thu 13-Mar-14 15:54:54

Thanks for the blog link TheOneWith i thought he sounded good esp. the open letter to Gove I'm glad someone is saying things like that to the intellectual in charge of Education ffs.

boobashka Thu 13-Mar-14 16:17:01

puggle it is a personal bugbear of mine that no one is ever offered a cup of tea in Ambridge; it's always coffee.

As a total tea Jenny, I find this really annoying/unrealistic <over-invested>

ErrolTheDragon Thu 13-Mar-14 16:27:05

I'm sure I've heard tea brewing before now.

Tim is quite right about the scoffing... at lambing time he's inside to get food inside him ASAP so it would sound odd if he didn't make eaty noises. He's also spot on with that letter to Gove.

BitOutOfPractice Thu 13-Mar-14 16:50:29

It was David's domestic dinosaurusness that got me into hot water on the other blush Archers forum.

<strokes warm bison>

ZeroSomeGameThingy Thu 13-Mar-14 17:03:06

Mmm... I think Alan retains some nasty, northern tea-drinking ways.

And I can't believe Joe has ever let anything as new and fancy as coffee pass his lips. But I can't think of anyone else. Even Mike would have had it bred out of him by Vicky.

Well spotted B!

BasketzatDawn Thu 13-Mar-14 17:14:56

Blimey, I thought I'd read up to page 5 yesterday evening, then find we're at page 9 already today!

My thoughts on Ruth, and cos I haven't got beyond p6 it may not be an actual original thought. But ....
maybe her delay whilst supermarket shopping the other day was that she was at Borchester Gen having a scan and came back looking pale cos she'd had bad news. if she's going to tell Daveed something on Sunday, then she must know something by now. Of course it could just be something like she's decided to see the GP as she doesn't feel right.

Another less bad option. A friend had her first ever episode of depression in early 40s. It was pout down to being in early menopause and she has done well on HRT (not always a good idea for a woman who's had breast cancer though) and antidepressants and is now getting on with her busy life. Being extra-tired, snappy, tearful, etc could be something 'simple' like that. I hope so.

BasketzatDawn Thu 13-Mar-14 17:18:58

Now jumped to page 9! I will read back tho0ugh. Even Ian asked jenny to make him teas, but could be just a courtesy thing in a <fusspot> MIL's kitchen. I'm hoiking my warm bison, hope you all are too. Yours not mine though. grin I think Jill's op is done. Was last Monday and uneventful, so far .....

BasketzatDawn Thu 13-Mar-14 17:22:17

Do any of you know when the bison 'lambing' season might be? and do they need milking? Just asking.

no idea re calving (?) / milking of bison, but you can get lovely warm soft yarn from them - quite expensive

BitOutOfPractice Thu 13-Mar-14 17:32:49

I think Tom could do worse than look at the market for bison burgers

BasketzatDawn Thu 13-Mar-14 17:38:19

Page 7 : Ruth at GP, after she's spent hours on phone getting past reception.'It's just a virus. A lot of people have them at present. What do you expect in the middle of lambing, at your age, with teenagers in the house'.

Has one of you mentioned Darrell? I'm getting pop-ups for caravans now. grin

BasketzatDawn Thu 13-Mar-14 17:44:44

Page 8 - I imagine if Daveed gets tetanus then the chomping sounds will have to stop. That'll be good, eh?

BitOutOfPractice Thu 13-Mar-14 17:55:45

Basketz - I have 100 messages a page. Justsayin'!

BasketzatDawn Thu 13-Mar-14 17:56:55

Please, Willy, don't tell MrBasketz about the very expensive bison knitting yarn. He may want to stop me listening to TA. I wonder if Hellen's been stopped listening to TA. My main fun pursuits these days are TA and knitting (yarn purchase).

I do hope Lonely Cow is okay. I want Tone's business to work out - cos I dislike Tom more than Tone. Incidentally, the weather in Borsetshire was very like the weather in Perthshire a few days ago. Tis odd for Radio England to have the pulse of Scotland, esp the weather map, kind of spot on.

ZeroSomeGameThingy Thu 13-Mar-14 18:00:19

Ok - I don't care but David will be reading out "Your News" on iPm this weekend. Eddie Mair has just said so.

oh DON'T basketz, i am on a yarn diet atm so we can afford loft conversion. dp has threatened to use any more wool purchases for the insulation

i stroked some qiviut yarn at ally pally a couple of years ago. YUM. and over £100 per 100g shock, which is partly i think because you can't shear a musk ox, the yarn has to be foraged gathered by hand when it sheds

zero will he be eating a sandwich at the same time?

ErrolTheDragon Thu 13-Mar-14 18:17:36

I've been googling... bison aren't milked (small teats, don't like being handled - they're not domesticated). Not to be confused with water buffalo, the milk of which is what proper mozzarella is made from.

This is probably the one thread where the question 'whats the difference between a buffalo and a bison' might be taken seriously... grin

PseudoBadger Thu 13-Mar-14 18:24:29

Was he the much awaited cameo appearance Zero?

ZeroSomeGameThingy Thu 13-Mar-14 18:37:03

Yes he was!

Suspect he'll be offered a brew.

I never listen now it's at some ungodly hour of the morning.

Tommy Thu 13-Mar-14 19:06:11

ha ha Brenda - "not so independent then" grin

ZeroSomeGameThingy Thu 13-Mar-14 19:07:26

Brenda and Tomshock


ErrolTheDragon Thu 13-Mar-14 19:10:50

Urgh, don't like Kingsley.

BitOutOfPractice Thu 13-Mar-14 19:11:59

What a bitch Brenda is!

TCforTopCat Thu 13-Mar-14 19:12:52

I want an 'intuitive' kitchen smile

poor kirsty sounded miserable

kingsley is hilarious!

'it's all about the pentagon'

BitOutOfPractice Thu 13-Mar-14 19:15:19

Aww! She's really unsettled Kirsty. Horrible cow!

well that was painful

Tommy Thu 13-Mar-14 19:18:06

Kirsty doesn't sound as though she has everything she wants..... sad

Tommy Thu 13-Mar-14 19:18:32

I'm going to enjoy Jenny and Kingsley though grin

BitOutOfPractice Thu 13-Mar-14 19:19:20

It was only painful because of Brenda. Tom and Kirsty felt backfooted by her breezing in with her boasting and snidey remarks.

ZeroSomeGameThingy Thu 13-Mar-14 19:20:17

Wonderful! Brenda really knows how to get under their skin.

And now Tom's going to get into even more money trouble - just to show her what a man he is.

yy bitoutofpractice

she had no real need to go and see tom, it was so cruel. that housing development news was bollocks - lilian could have told tom herself (as he reported to kirsty)

ZeroSomeGameThingy Thu 13-Mar-14 19:22:36

Oh.... Brenda's never going to marry "Aidan" is she? Think of all the years of fun ahead.grin

oif Thu 13-Mar-14 19:23:13

I could just about believe the kitchen designer getting all orgasmic about umbrian limestone, but Jenny's breathless "Oh, Kingsley" was a step too far…

Or perhaps there is out there a phenomenon of wannabe ladies-of-the-manor of a certain age who are seduced by smooth-voiced men caressing underfloor heating panels and whispering in their ears about sturdy cabinets and pentagons and nicely sliding drawers and TA is just doing us a public service in making this terrible deviancy more widely known

BitOutOfPractice Thu 13-Mar-14 19:23:21

Even the Tom-haters (I am not one) must admit that Kirsty didn't deserve that!

"Oh no, we haven't set a date. We are happy as we are". Ugh!

oif Thu 13-Mar-14 19:25:05

Oh I didn't think Brenda was deliberately being bitchy (apart from the stab about 'not so independent', which fair enough!) - I got the impression they are all just a bit unsure they have what they really want which is why B is slightly over-compensating in the 'whopping Wapping' stories etc. and why K & T both feel a bit unsettled.

i agree that none of them sound sure of their choices oif

sad that iPM is on at 0545 atm sad

but happy it'll be on iplayer so I can still listen!!! smile

I loved Brenda's 'independent' dig

loved even more than Tom didn't get it (clunky though the writing was grin)

pasbeaucoupdegendarme Thu 13-Mar-14 20:57:33

"It's all about the intuitive pentagon" - a contender for next thread title?! (We'll need one soon enough, the way this is going...)

TheShimmeringPussycat Thu 13-Mar-14 21:08:28

I switched on halfway through, and was absolutely mesmerised by the intuitive pentagon stuff. I think it makes good sense grin

I have tiles in my kitchen badly laid by Ex which smash anything dropped to smithereens, and are hard on my feet and knees. (There is no underfloor heating though). Jenny spends such a long time in there when she does cook that I am quite concerned at this choice.

Didn't hear Brenda and Tom, Brenda and Kirsty just sounded mutually embarrassed I thought, and does anyone think Kirsty is questioning the whole thing? Perhaps PC Burns could be destined for her???

Lomaamina Thu 13-Mar-14 21:29:35

I cheered at Brenda's independent dig at Tom. Well deserved. Did nt think she sounded too show offy, just happy with her career success following her brilliant training in marketing at the internationally renowned seat of learning: felpersham "uni" grin, not to mention her oh-so-trendy loft living in seedy Wapping.

PseudoBadger Thu 13-Mar-14 21:34:35

I was most disappointed in Kingsley - I was hoping for someone like Frank the wedding planner from Father of the Bride grin

Martorana Thu 13-Mar-14 21:49:47

They (the scriptwriters ) are back to taking the piss sad with the Jennifer/Kingsley thing. So completely put of character for her.....

GypsyFloss Thu 13-Mar-14 21:52:42

Oh yes Frahnk! Definitely the best wedding planner ever and perhaps one of my favourite silly films.

Lomaamina Thu 13-Mar-14 21:53:17

Yes her simpering at him was mind boggling. And did she really shut Brian outside?!

GypsyFloss Thu 13-Mar-14 21:53:31

I agree Martorana , I think it's a bit OTT even for her.

JessieMcJessie Fri 14-Mar-14 02:18:18

Brilliant episode. I have to admit to laughing out loud at Jennifer and Kingsley. Neat touch too having chip off the old block Alice similarly breathlessly excited and carried away about the wedding planning.

I don't believe Tom would know a highlight from a turkish delight though.

ppeatfruit Fri 14-Mar-14 07:58:46

bitoutofpractice ILOVE that baby bison grin thanks!!! are you knitting your own insulation? (i would've loved wool insulation too).

Are you me? i agree about Brenda coming across as a beatch of the 1st order swanning in to Ambridge to show off her highlights and engagement ring and boasting about her HUGE flat in Wapping!!!!!

Oh and yes Jenny's ripe for the picking (maybe a bit old though). Loved smarmy Kingsley agreeing with everything she said .Of course he would she's going to spend 150 thousand odd on the kitchen from hell.

PseudoBadger Fri 14-Mar-14 07:59:32

I foresee doom for Tony's poor cows sad

Bluestocking Fri 14-Mar-14 08:03:47

I think Brenda's being set up to replace Lillian - she'll work her way through a series of rich husbands, becoming personally richer herself with each divorce - the "we're happy as we are" period will buy time for her to identify a crack divorce lawyer and get a solid pre-nup drawn up. Then over the next fifty years or so she'll periodically reappear in Ambridge, causing turbulence and dissatisfaction among the more modestly caparisoned stay-at-homes.

BitOutOfPractice Fri 14-Mar-14 08:09:52

ppeat I think we are lone voices n the wilderness!

Sadly the only knitting I can do is on a Knitting Nancy!

ErrolTheDragon Fri 14-Mar-14 08:11:07

They need a bit of comic relief in the form of JD and Kingsley to offset whatever gloom is about to descend on Brookfield and the darkness of Rob.

Add 10% to the value of your house for a mere 20% of it's value.... besides which real farmhouses don't get sold, they get passed on to family one way or another (though how they'll sort that out with 2 farmers neither of whom is Brines birth child will make for fun in a decade or two).

I do envy underfloor heating on chilly mornings... but only when I've forgotten to put my slippers on. The dog would adore it.

ppeatfruit Fri 14-Mar-14 08:21:15

I've heard that underfloor heating doesn't 'rise' IFYSWIM so you get sweaty feet and a cold nose!!!

CuttedUpPear Fri 14-Mar-14 08:33:32

I love your theory about Brenda Bluestocking grin

Kingsley's voice sounds really familiar. I jumped in surprise when I heard him. Do we know him, or the characterisation, from somewhere else?

ErrolTheDragon Fri 14-Mar-14 08:43:41

Reckon you're right about Brenda.

BOOP, ppeat - if you believed everything in Wikipedia I'd be able to glean some bison wool from the hedgerows - the entry for my village used to include this:

'It has many great night-spots and is famous for a small herd of bison that were nearly all killed off by DEFRA during the 2001 foot and mouth outbreak, only to be saved by local villagers taking turns to chain themselves to the grateful beasts.'

Regrettably the entry was edited back to a stub with the comment 'i'm sure some of these things are true, but some seem unlikely and all need sourcing'. grin

puggle01 Fri 14-Mar-14 09:01:09

Great idea bluestocking - especialy when there was such bitterness/rivalry/hate whatever between Lilian & Brenda.
DH is home (works half the week away) and chatted through the episode. Sigh! And my crazy eccentric father is visiting at the weekend and he only discovers the power of speech between 10 and 11:15 on a Sunday. I suspect talking during the omnibus may have been the "unreasonable behaviour" cited for DF & DM's divorce.

JessieMcJessie Fri 14-Mar-14 09:01:55

Sorry, I don't get all these bison references. It's making this thread come across as a bit cliquey- might I politely ask that we rein them in so that new posters feel welcome and the "13 minutes a day" community keeps expanding?

ZeroSomeGameThingy Fri 14-Mar-14 09:11:59

We seem to have similar plans for the lovely Brenda Bluestockinggrin

It would be a delicious irony given how scathing she has been of Lilian for about twenty years... Perhaps there was some hidden psychological impulse - to despise the thing you will become? Every time she railed against the merry widow she was learning how to become her.

mummytime Fri 14-Mar-14 09:50:49

I want that for Brenda too _ at the last Liliam and Brenda kind of made up I thought?

She will of course have the redeeming feature of being lovely with her half-sister!

My son has a running joke that he wants a kitchen just made up of islands - maybe he is a younger Kingsley?

ppeatfruit Fri 14-Mar-14 09:58:01

Errol your village sounds really great grin

Actually jessie i'm not sure about the origin of the bison references grin I just went along with them because they were amusing. Don't worry i HOPE we're not cliquey (not intentionally anyway grin).

Though of course we can't all agree about everything can we?

ppeatfruit Fri 14-Mar-14 10:02:38

Oh I'm a twit they were in Errol's village she just posted that reference to them in Wikipedia sorry for being dense everyone!!grin

BitOutOfPractice Fri 14-Mar-14 10:05:03

Sorry Jessie. I said something about returning to the warm bosom of this thread and my phone tried to correct it to warm bison.

It's not a cliquey in joke - it's there on the first page of this thread. And I am a newbie anyway so shrugs

There'll always be little referneces and nicknames and stuff on long running threads / series.

ppeatfruit Fri 14-Mar-14 10:21:20

I'm also right though BitOutOf aren't I? That makes your typo even weirder!

ErrolTheDragon Fri 14-Mar-14 10:28:34

We don't really have bison in our village - llamas yes, a herd of deer yes, but the bison (and the rest of the wiki entry for the village at that time) were pure fiction. An object lesson in being sceptical of internet sources!

I now very much want the lurking SWs to have Tony's next venture be a herd of water buffaloes with Helen producing artisan mozzarella from the milk. I mean with all the flooding they sound like something we should have more of.

Jux Fri 14-Mar-14 10:34:58

I had to give up listening when dd was born, 14 years ago. My life has been impoverished ever since.

BitOutOfPractice Fri 14-Mar-14 11:07:38

Why Jux? You just need to inculcate her in the ways of Ambridge!

Ppeat that really made me laugh grin I can imagine the herds of bison sweeping majestically over the English landscape with Errol astride a horse and chewing a cheroot, surveying her herd

ppeatfruit Fri 14-Mar-14 11:43:07

grin BitOutOf OH on R2 they want people who met Tony Benn to talk about him I thought of you (sorry just lurked on TB's RIP thread). Well my friend had llamas! I'd have alpacas if we had someone to feed them when we're away!

When we viewed this house (in rural Fr) the light fitting in the salon was an oxen harness a huge effing thing big enough for bison grin grin Luckily the old occupants took it!

BitOutOfPractice Fri 14-Mar-14 11:53:56

That sounds like an interesting fixture PP!

I haven't had the radio on this morning as I've been doing an online training course (with a break on MN between each module, natch). I have just taken the exam and passed. I got 98% and a certificate. You may curtsey to me now

BlackeyedSusan Fri 14-Mar-14 11:57:53

Phew finally caught up after three threads!

Tony's indifferent cow. (she's not interested in the fence etc) sounds ominus and I so want him to be sucessful.

The "Ruth is ill" thing is really obvious now, surely we are going to find out why soon. We did not have to wait that long to find out vicky was up-duffed did we?

Agree that Tom and Kirsty are going to be very in debt with all that money spent. They are not going to be able to afford the mortgage repayments and Gran is not going to have enough to cover it all. Will they move in with T andP or Peggy? If they move in with peggy is Rob going to be really nasty to get rid of them as sitting tenants when peggy turns up her toes?

The Hazel/village shop/Grundy house seems to have gone quiet...

Oh and Robs Red Flags. More red flags than a mayday procession in soviet Russia.

ppeatfruit Fri 14-Mar-14 11:58:45

ooooh we'll have to pay to speak to you now thanks and many congratulations !!!!

ppeatfruit Fri 14-Mar-14 12:03:09

That's for ABitOutOf* .

Blackeyed Welcome! I reckon it's an early menopause for Ruth.

BitOutOfPractice Fri 14-Mar-14 12:32:15

Hello Blackeyes - you're right about T&K I think. Although they are usually very coy about money on TA aren't they?

I so wish I could tell you what my certificate is for ppeat. It would make you laugh your head off. But sadly it would out me once and for all on here and I like my cloak of anonymity

TheShimmeringPussycat Fri 14-Mar-14 13:16:52

I assume sorting out Jeck's estate is happening in RL time, rather than Borchester time, which is subject to fluctuation. So couple more months before Hazel actually gets her mits on it.

HumphreyCobbler Fri 14-Mar-14 13:47:48

I do not buy Tony's ignoring of the ill cow for ONE SECOND. He should be all over this situation like a rash, given how much he wants this to work.

GypsyFloss Fri 14-Mar-14 13:51:17

Been thinking about the voice of Kingsley. He sounded like Ifty the maths teacher to me.

Water buffalo, now there's a thought.

Icimoi Fri 14-Mar-14 14:07:46

Trying to diagnose Roooth's repeat symptom of feeling light headed. Does that mean circulatory/heart problems?

Sunnymeg Fri 14-Mar-14 14:14:34

So according to Kingsley and his 'pentagon', I have a perfect kitchen, which is strange because I always thought I just had a really small one!!

PseudoBadger Fri 14-Mar-14 14:18:41

Toby's judgement is off Humphrey. I'm sure he is worried, but much like if Helen thinks anything about Rob is 'off', he will want to save face rather than admit he's made a very expensive mistake. He's being a ostrich. Ooh, maybe they should farm Emus?

I just read a fab interview with Robert Duvall in which his final comment is

What’s your take on the film industry today?

'Well, my favorite movie from last year was The Invisible Woman. I would’ve voted for the girl [ Felicity Jones ] for the Oscar. Beautiful movie.'

Wow - there's a tribute and a half! I need to see it now!

ErrolTheDragon Fri 14-Mar-14 14:41:59

There were some ostriches being farmed in the next village to us a while ago. I think they're farmed for meat but I could see young Josh diversifying into ostrich eggs.

Redcliff Fri 14-Mar-14 14:43:51

Now you mention it I think Tony is off his game - Ruth and David are always quick of the mark to check any cow related issues so why wouldn't Tony. I really want his venture to succeed - cant take a "told you so" from Tom and/or Peggy.

PseudoBadger Fri 14-Mar-14 14:50:08

Why did I write Toby?! Tony Tony Tony Tony

ppeatfruit Fri 14-Mar-14 15:04:26

WRF to the 'pentagon' kitchen plan;while slimeballKingsley was counting the steps to the fridge I thought "well the more steps you take in a day the slimmer you stay". (and it's true) what's wrong with walking round your kitchen FFS? Does Jenny need to put on weight?

he would hate my parents' house. their fridge is two whole rooms away from the kitchen!

ppeatfruit Fri 14-Mar-14 15:39:01

I want a range fitted in my kitchen and that would involve moving the fridge quite a way from where the hob is now.I say good grin dh could definitely do with the walk!! it might keep him out of it!!

TheShimmeringPussycat Fri 14-Mar-14 15:41:00

Yes everytime they mention NewLonelyCow I feel all worried and want to yell at Tony on the radio. Same with Ruth, (the worrying, not the shouting, I actually like Ruth and am not irritated by her) but not so much!

oif Fri 14-Mar-14 16:19:25

I like the water buffalo plan! It reminds me how I once passed on an interesting 'fact' I heard somewhere that I now quite forget although I'm sure it was of sound provenance, of how there are more water buffalo in Britain that some breeds of native cow. DP deliberately misunderstood me to be meaning that I thought there were more water buffalo in UK than cattle, and has teased me mercilessly about this since - "oh, is that a water buffalo there, the black and white one with the udders?" etc.

I also like this plan for Brenda to morph into the new Lillian (Brillian?).

Am starting to wish I had some kind of skill for writing/ideas - this article on scriptwriting for TA makes it sound like such an interesting and fun job.

Toomuchtea Fri 14-Mar-14 16:46:24

I am also very worried about Newlonelycow. I can't believe that Tony wouldn't have noticed, or that Pat wouldn't have either. Wasn't she born in a Welsh dairy or something? And if Tom's that worried he ought to go and look at the cow himself. I mean, I've had animals all my life and if ever one's just hanging about doing nothing, you notice, and even more so if they're new stock in case they've got something they're going to give everything else.

I did wonder if cows get grass sickness like horses, but I don't think that they do. Am not at all slightly ashamed I went off and googled that instead of working.

RocknRollNerd Fri 14-Mar-14 17:11:35

I know this is going back a few days to the delicious awfulness of the dinner party but Ian was only tipped over the edge by the comment about The Lodge and his outrage on behalf of Adam... I think they really are going for the slow burn with this one. Although that said a part of me was worried that they were going to go upstairs at the end and find Henry killed by acute plotdevices. Am also somewhat annoyed that especially given they are going to go down the DV route they have thought it acceptable to cast a guy conviceted of GBH as PC Plot - it's not like there is a shortage of actors out there.

I like the light-relief of Jennifers kitchen and am bloody grateful they didn't just get Darryl in to fix the squeaky drawer. The more Kate gets stuck into wedding planning the more I'm convinced that there is a penury in store for Tom and Kirsty.

YY that Tony seems most out of character ignoring LonleyCowII it doesn't bode well. Perhaps Peggy will bail him out and then tell Tom it's tough shit over the house deposit.

oif Fri 14-Mar-14 17:18:44

tbf we are only inferring that Tony is ignoring The Suspicious Cow from the fact that he has brushed off comments from Tom and Mike(?). But that could just be a show of bravado and he may well be checking that poor old bovine out or having a word with Alastair as we speak…

Toomuchtea Fri 14-Mar-14 17:58:05

I hope so, oif, I hope so. RocknRoll, the further away Darryl is the happier I am. Yes, costs do seem to be spiralling horribly out of control for Tom and Kirsty don't they? I did find the whole Helen-suggests-a-wedding-planner thing a bit clunky. Rather obvious device to up the costs and send (spend?) poor Kirsty into a spin.

What is the thing about casting someone convicted of GBH?

Toomuchtea Fri 14-Mar-14 17:59:18

I do actually love this thread. I just feel I should say that. For too long my addiction has been a lone one that dare not speak its name, let alone its very, very numerous opinions. Because these things matter, after all.

Gigondas Fri 14-Mar-14 18:05:08

Bloke that plays the policeman who spoke to wi and helped Jill accused of shattering someone's eye socket in Cheshire club.

I am behind this week so need a catch up.

Toomuchtea Fri 14-Mar-14 18:20:44

Hmmm. What will the WI do when they find out, I wonder?

ErrolTheDragon Fri 14-Mar-14 18:22:14

Toomuch <whispers> they don't know PC Plot is an actor

mrsbirdie Fri 14-Mar-14 18:28:57

New in this thread, but a long time on off listener (soundtrack to my childhood and didn't take any notice, took comfort in its familiar dulcet tones at university) who has recently been sucked back in. Hope I can chip in.

Am currently hidden in a corner of my library, intended to go home but its over half an hour away and now too late. Will plug in to my laptop, my concern for the LonelyCow is too great. Also I want someone to banish Kingsley the smarmy kitchen man back to his land of worktops and magic pentagons. I hope the scary librarians don't find me and shout

RocknRollNerd Fri 14-Mar-14 18:29:25

Gigondas, he was convicted of it, he got 200 hours of community service hence my crack previously about him having other demands on his time so perhaps not available for too many scenes.

Toomuchtea Fri 14-Mar-14 18:46:12

Errol.... you mean <whispers back> he's not real? How can they do this to the WI?

MataHairy Fri 14-Mar-14 18:50:02

316 posts on since this thread started on Tuesday shock

Toomuchtea Fri 14-Mar-14 18:57:15

DS's girlfriend has just brought me wine. They are cooking. I am all alone with the radio.

puggle01 Fri 14-Mar-14 19:09:01

Yesterday's episode was teetering on the brink of outing Brian as a Spoony fucker - though shied away at the last minute. The scriptwriters are definitely here!

MikeTheShite Fri 14-Mar-14 19:09:36

Does anyone else think Ruth is perhaps pregnant?

MataHairy Fri 14-Mar-14 19:10:27

Yep, definitely!

ZeroSomeGameThingy Fri 14-Mar-14 19:11:24

Lots of people Mike!

MikeTheShite Fri 14-Mar-14 19:13:45

Sorry. I'm new to the thread.

I just remember her symptoms were what I had- cue 22 weeks wink

are we getting no rob and helen installment? !

Scuttlebug Fri 14-Mar-14 19:15:00

Oooo, the preggers chat from Jill!!

Scuttlebug Fri 14-Mar-14 19:15:53

Idea of Kenton kissing Jolene with a big old chocolatey smacker has made me feel a bit queasy.

Toomuchtea Fri 14-Mar-14 19:16:06

Can they do this? Didn't this happen with Vickie? Does someone in the SW team have a thing about peri-menopausal babies?

oif Fri 14-Mar-14 19:16:19

Ah I like Usha. And she is the lone voice of reason at last - someone has mentioned going to the Dr! Hooray!

And there we go! I was wrong and all you canny pregnancy spotters were right!

MikeTheShite Fri 14-Mar-14 19:19:47

oh jill agrees smile

Completely agree about Kenton and Jolene making me feel nauseoussmile

I have a friend who said pregnancy too and I was all 'oh no they've done that' Given that Jill is pretty infallible though......grin

I hope it's a girl. Emily Archer?

Scuttlebug Fri 14-Mar-14 19:22:52

And Ruth was saying how happy she was with the kids all doing well and grown up...far from those nappy days and sleepless nights...

Toomuchtea Fri 14-Mar-14 19:24:27

But just think of the implications - if Ruth's pregnant, who will milk the cows? It'll be Pip won't it? And it was so much better without her. Or perhaps the plague will sweep through Tony's new herd and he will be able to take the Brookfield lot over.

This is an opportunity for the Ambridge job fairy - Ruth is going to need more domestic help. Emma can have more hours as Brookfield mothers help - cook, clean and mind Miss Archer. I do hope she is up the duff. Pip will be unbearable!

Jennifer had quite a late baby as I recall. She was 40 something when Alice arrived.

43 in fact. According to the BBC web page Ruth is 45, 46 this year so well within the age of falling pregnant surprisingly grin

MataHairy Fri 14-Mar-14 19:36:03

Might be twins, they're common in later pregnancies aren't they?

ComposHat Fri 14-Mar-14 19:39:46

Could this be an abortion storyline with Ruth feeling she is too old to be going through the whole thing again?

& Alice was more than 25 years ago, when 40+ was older than it is now as far as pregnancy is concerned (iyswim)

loads of women have babies in their 40s these days, don't they

WhatSheSaid Fri 14-Mar-14 19:48:22

I'd be really surprised if they did another 40's pg storyline so soon after Vicky. I hope it's not a recurrence of the cancer though. So maybe it will be perimenopause.

ErrolTheDragon Fri 14-Mar-14 19:49:20

>Could this be an abortion storyline with Ruth feeling she is too old to be going through the whole thing again?

or because of some problem from doing lambing while pg as I mentioned earlier.

Toomuchtea Fri 14-Mar-14 20:19:40

Did Ruth do much lambing this season? I thought she was just getting ratty with David while he was. But I might well have not been paying attention.

BasketzatDawn Fri 14-Mar-14 20:22:56

That was quite cleverly done. I thought while Ruth was talking to Usha it must be the menopause, then the story turns to pregnancy. I'm still unsure of the statistical likelihood of another 'late' baby so soon in a relatively small community. AND I hope fervently there'll be none of that awful couple talk between Ruth and Daveed about the utterly wonderful Hungarian sex that brought this about. Urgh! it also seems odd that a relatively happy married couple only have sex when they go away, or so it would seem if it was so clearly the Budapesht wot did for them. grin
It also seems weird that a similar story line will happen again - all the risk of a baby having Down's syndrome, and the will we, won't we stuff of testing and having the baby etc. Urgh yet again. Of course, if the baby did have DS, then there could eb some brilliant scenes involving Vickoi and a very special kind of competitive parenting. BTW, I know of wot I speak, I have 2 SN sons, and there are various irritating but ultimately quite funny scenarios in my memory bank.

bracken101 Fri 14-Mar-14 20:23:16

I think abortion story too. Finding it gripping, not sure why!

kernowal Fri 14-Mar-14 20:28:03

Just a quicky, how old is Vickie?

BasketzatDawn Fri 14-Mar-14 20:44:02

Do you recall in the dim and distant past the family 'fall out' when Elizabeth had her pregnancy terminated? I can't recall Jill's view, but I remember Shula being very upset - she was going through IVF at the time and was very disturbed when Eliz didn't let her and Mark adopt the baby.

I think Vickoi was 46ish when Bethany was born. It's relatively rare for women over 45 to have babies, compared to early 40s. Without looking it up, the numbers do drop quite a lot after 45, I think. But, as a colleague once said about another colleague who lives on a remote island, I suppose there's less for them to do there. grin Maybe Ambridge is the same. Not to mention Budapest of course.grin The 'remote' friend and I had a good laugh about that one.

PseudoBadger Fri 14-Mar-14 20:46:16

Just a quicky, how old is Vickie?

You're a poet and you don't know it!

I think it's rarer for a woman to have a first child late in her forties than it is for a woman who already has a number of children to have another. But I might just have made that up.
I know two women who had surprise third children aged 46 and another who was 43.

JollyGolightly Fri 14-Mar-14 20:56:10

toomuch I read Helen's suggestion of the planner as living her bridezilla fantasies through poor old krusty, who'd be so.much happier with trestle tables and jamjars with meadowsweet to.decorate them. I feel sorry for her having to pretend she likes the flashy wedding and wrong dress.

Ruth def preggo - dizziness an early indicator for me, and it's 3 months since the anniversary bonkfest.

According to the BBC webpage again Vickie is in her 'late 40s' so probably older than Ruth.

bracken101 Fri 14-Mar-14 21:03:10

Maybe Pip will come home pregnant and there will be a whole mother- daughter pregnancy thing going on? Very un- am bridge but you never know!

JollyGolightly Fri 14-Mar-14 21:31:48

Oh I hope it doesn't speak like Pip.

Bluestocking Fri 14-Mar-14 22:10:04

I think Kingsley might be an exponent of the dark arts. As JDarling paces the intuitive pentangle, she will inadvertently summon Dark Forces which will SATTC. Nigel will come back from the dead and lurk in the treetop walk biting the heads off birds, John's restless spirit will take over Jim's sports car (the Massey Ferguson having been disposed of) and roar around the lanes terrorising the old ladies. Molly Button's head will spin round and round and she will declaim doggerel in the voice of Neet Froi. Eventually things will get so bad that the Reverend Bunter will be forced to stop writing his lovely sermons, take up bell, book and candle and exorcise the entire village.

ErrolTheDragon Fri 14-Mar-14 22:15:58

Just as well JD wisely rejected the Japanese grill (WTF? does anyone really have those in a domestic kitchen?), it would have made a perfect altar for his unholy doings.

However, Nigel-ghost would not bite the heads off birds. He would use his noncorporeality to good effect playing practical jokes on people.

ZeroSomeGameThingy Fri 14-Mar-14 22:41:23

Oh, that would be a beautiful thing. It's entirely time for Lower Loxley to host a resident sprite. (Particularly that one.)

I knew there was something missing....

Bluestocking Fri 14-Mar-14 22:49:11

You are absolutely right, Errol. Nigel was so un-dark that even if he was summoned back by dark forces, he would still be a benign presence. He would hang around the Orangerie causing confusion about whether to put the jam or the cream on the scone first, and rearranging the paintings in Lewis's gallery, and (most importantly) reminding Lizzie, Freddie and Lily how much he loves them.
Not sure why Bert came out as Neet. Why should he be in employment, education or training? He is about 110 years old.

pasbeaucoupdegendarme Fri 14-Mar-14 23:20:19

Ghost Nigel! Woooo!

("Wooooo!" as in "Yeah!", not "Wooooooo!" as in "MN Woo".)

ZeroSomeGameThingy Fri 14-Mar-14 23:24:45

Where can I sign the petition?

TheShimmeringPussycat Sat 15-Mar-14 00:08:56

And ghost-Nigel would save the fortunes of Lower Loxley smile

TheShimmeringPussycat Sat 15-Mar-14 00:09:33

Oooh and he could haunt Rob...

Martorana Sat 15-Mar-14 00:20:10

Maybe Freddie will find the haunted gorilla suit in the attic.........

PseudoBadger Sat 15-Mar-14 03:56:33

I wished for ZombieNigel last thread....

ZeroSomeGameThingy Sat 15-Mar-14 05:27:50

He would make a lovely zombie Pseudo but, let's be honest, an invisible ghost could cause far more confusion and annoyance to Rob. And that's the important thing.

Eastpoint Sat 15-Mar-14 05:41:48

I can't believe David & Ruth would be lax with contraception after seeing Vicki get pg. I don't remember though if any of her others were 'surprises'. Poor Ruth if she is, I'm the same age as her & really couldn't face having another baby.

Ladyflip Sat 15-Mar-14 05:52:12

Just caught up from Tuesday onwards. Marking place and want to say that cows do get grass staggers in the spring, due to low magnesium levels.

Link here

But IME livestock go down with this quite quickly so it may not be. Plus, grass hasn't really started growing that much in Ambridge as it has been raining hard over the last few weeks.

mummytime Sat 15-Mar-14 06:49:03

Eastpoint - I know a lot of now young people who were the result of "contraception failure" which includes most methods imaginable. Its very annoying if you are trying to conceive, but mother nature can be sneaky sometimes.

I was wondering too about whether Ruth being pregnant might be a termination storyline. If it was Budapest as keeps being hinted then she would be around 12 weeks I think?

Last night covered most of the options we've thought of

If Roooth is pregnant isn't there an issue about lambing? She helped David out. Just off to google that.

Martorana Sat 15-Mar-14 07:41:46

I was just about to say that, remembering!

JollyGolightly Sat 15-Mar-14 07:54:00

Yes my pregnant sister works on a farm and isnt with the sheep during lambing.Very dangerous bacteria can cause mc.

Eastpoint Sat 15-Mar-14 08:00:56

But mummytime seeing a neighbour get pg at a similar age to yourself is a good reminder. I like the way Usha just thought peri menopause & Jill thought pg!

Yes it is a risk - there are notices up on farms you can visit during lambing


So maybe it won't be termination but mc from infection from lambing?

I've grown much fonder if Roooth over the past year I hope it's not too sad.

FrumiousBandersnatch Sat 15-Mar-14 08:50:56

The risk with lambing is toxoplasmosis, but after a lifetime of sheep farming surely Ruth would have been exposed years ago and therefore developed some immunity.

Ben was a surprise. Conceived I seem to remember after an amorous moment atop a hay waggon. Then David had to deliver him whilst the Am flooded. I remember Ruth screaming a lot. I hope because of her age they recommend a nice, calm, planned C-section this time.

NMFP Sat 15-Mar-14 09:08:53

The long awaited Amber Archer.... I thought the scriptwriters were going to leave it too late.

Bluestocking Sat 15-Mar-14 09:14:55

Why Amber, NMFP? I think it rings a faint bell but can't at all remember the story.
You would think a woman who's been pregnant three times and works with breeding animals would at least have considered the possibility that she might be pregnant again. But dear old Ruth really isn't the sharpest knife in the drawer, is she?

ZeroSomeGameThingy Sat 15-Mar-14 09:29:59


Amber mentioned here -

It's all babies...

ppeatfruit Sat 15-Mar-14 09:37:03

Yes eastpoint TA were split like the Mners! I agree bluestocking after so many years of cooking she leaves food to burn etc. grin maybe her periods hadn't stopped properly?

GypsyFloss Sat 15-Mar-14 09:51:27

A ghost Nigel sounds like the best idea ever. A pregnant Rooth less so. I'm imaging that it'll be the menopause and we will get public service announcements on how to look after ourselves as we get older.

PseudoBadger Sat 15-Mar-14 10:47:50

From NHS:
What are the risks for pregnant women?
Infections that can affect female sheep (ewes) and which could be passed to pregnant women include:
Q fever

The risks are low
These infections are uncommon in sheep and very rare in humans. The number of human pregnancies affected by contact with sheep is extremely small.
Although the risks are low, pregnant women should still avoid close contact with sheep during lambing.

Advice for pregnant women
To avoid the risk of infection, if you’re pregnant or think you might be pregnant:
do not help deliver lambs (or calves or kids)
do not milk ewes
avoid contact with aborted (miscarried) or newborn lambs, and with the afterbirth, birthing fluids or contaminated materials, such as bedding
ensure your partner washes thoroughly after contact with ewes that are lambing
clothing worn during lambing should be washed separately from other washing
Farmers are responsible for minimising the risk to pregnant women and members of their family, the public and professional staff who visit their farms.

When to get medical advice
Seek medical advice if you’re pregnant and:
you have a high temperature or flu-like symptoms
you think you may have got an infection from a farm environment

Are there risks from other animals?
Cows and goats that have recently given birth can also carry similar infections. Pregnant women should also be aware that the risk is present at other times of the year, not just during the lambing season.

ppeatfruit Sat 15-Mar-14 12:54:58

I remember that cat poo is a risk too. I don't know if there's a Brookfield cat (there should be).

with cats it's also toxoplasmosis - pregnant women should be v careful with litter trays. there probably is at least one barn cat but litter trays unlikely to be a requirement!

she's certainly been in the lambing shed with David a time or two this year & I'm sure she actually got involved at least once

I vaguely remember Shula and/or Lizzie being warned to stay away from Brookfield during lambing while pregnant (agricultural public service announcement)

does David also mention it to the visitors on Open Farm Sunday? although the lambs are quite old by then of course

NMFP Sat 15-Mar-14 14:11:22

'Amber' was the name given to Ruth's much anticipated new baby on the old Archers message board. No idea where it comes from - the Am?

mummytime Sat 15-Mar-14 18:13:49

Eastpoint - I'm not just talking about people who forgot to use contraception but those who did, including the coil.

Eastpoint Sat 15-Mar-14 19:40:07

Aha, I'm more used to people who thought it was 'safe'.

We never hear about contraceptive choices on TA (or did we in Amex when Alice had that dodgy flatmate) ooh & I've just remembered about Elizabeth's abortion.

ppeatfruit Sun 16-Mar-14 09:47:13

True eastpoint and mummytime I always said that all the soap characters missed the contraception class in school. Either that or the S.W.ers use pregnancy as a dramatic device rather than contraception failure IFYSWIM.

Halsall Sun 16-Mar-14 10:22:46

What about Annette, Greg's daughter who parked herself on Hellin for far too long a while? She DTD with slimy Leon, Hellin's then-boyfriend, and got pregnant by accident. Can't remember now whether it was contraceptive failure.

strugstu Sun 16-Mar-14 10:38:13

Listening to omnibus now - hearing poor Henry cry out - Rob the knob is a good nickname for him !

ppeatfruit Sun 16-Mar-14 11:08:39

Yes and the worst part is that Hell didn't ignore Titch and just go up to Henry. "for the 2nd time".

I'm wondering whether this storyline about Ruth was supposed to be 2-3 weeks ago but got put back by all the spurious 'flooding' plotlines

So now she's a lot further on than originally intended (assuming it's a Buda-baby)