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Property/DIY

Is this estate agent on glue?

19 replies

JumpJockey · 02/10/2015 23:00

The description says :
'Offering a very unique opportunity for suitors to create their own vision of how cottage living works for them. This property is indeed packed with opportunity and reminiscence of how good old fashioned Britain once lived.

The creative eye will seek the potential opportunity within this property and the final outcome could indeed be a joyous masterpiece.'

OK, so, suitors?! Are people going to romance this house? And you can't say Very unique, you just can't.

Now look at the house and tell me 'reminiscence of how good old fashioned Britain once lived' doesn't just mean 'a tired old house in dire need of vast amounts of work'

www.rightmove.co.uk/property-for-sale/property-36655329.html

OP posts:
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FruSirkaOla · 03/10/2015 07:39

"Is this estate agent on glue?"
Yes, quite possibly Grin

Look at some of their other descriptions, I give you this one as an example :

"Imagine yourself waking up and walking out onto your balcony from the master bedroom, watching the morning mist lift over the River Cam and the rowers glide along the waters."

"Now imagine yourself pushing back the frameless, bi fold doors from the living room, opening up to the large decking area, enjoying breakfast outside and reflecting on the day ahead."

"Can you picture it?"
"Now come and live it!"

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QOD · 03/10/2015 07:54

Cottage living = shitting next to the kitchen

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BigGreenOlives · 03/10/2015 07:55

They are honest, it is how people used to live. Unmodernised would be another way to describe it. I'm surprised they haven't put an 'opportunity to purchase a house owned by the same family for 50 years'.

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suzannecaravan · 03/10/2015 08:01

cant write for toffee can they
is there an estate agents creative writing courseConfused
absolute pants isnt it

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Idefix · 03/10/2015 08:04

Mmm needs a new kitchen and bathroom Grin and a little decorating.
Hats off to the positive spin that ea has manage to put on this, obviously meds glue are working.
Pretty normal in these type of cottages for bathroom to lead off from the kitchen.
I am sure this will be snapped up by some lucky punter given that competitive price...

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acatcalledjohn · 03/10/2015 08:06

'reminiscence of how good old fashioned Britain once lived'

I wasn't expecting a 70s decor when I read that. Had it been anything pre-WW2 in terms of style, then yes, that description would have made sense.

I'm just imagining viewers are given the full experience by the EA playing greatest hits from the early 70s in the background during viewings.

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Frusso · 03/10/2015 08:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheCrowFromBelow · 03/10/2015 08:31

packed with ... reminiscence of makes no sense at all Grin but then neither does a house having suitors!
Strange they don't mention the handy location on an A road though.

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Pipnposy · 03/10/2015 08:38

We viewed a house once with the description 'zen-style front garden'. It was a square metre of gravel at the front of a back to back terrace.

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suzannecaravan · 03/10/2015 08:41

Poetic license??

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wowfudge · 03/10/2015 09:35

I think it was written by someone who has just found the thesaurus function in Word, but doesn't really understand it. If I were the vendor I'd be having words. And it's overpriced.

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didireallysaythat · 03/10/2015 09:52

Great Shelford, walking distance to station, looks cheap to me which suggests wide angle lens photos and overlooked. Busy road, awkward layout but the station trumps that I think. Oversubscribed schools I think but yummy mum deli around the corner.

Not the language I'd expect from Abbott's - maybe they were just having fun !

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ElsieMc · 03/10/2015 11:46

I worked for an estate agent who always put in each brochure "A central attractive feature of the room is....the fireplace/window/doors". What does that mean? Also another local agent uses the word "bijou" a lot to describe very tiny properties in which only a guinea pig can reside.

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RaphaellaTheSpanishWaterDog · 03/10/2015 16:52

Yes. Quite possibly Grin

I realise this might be a deceased estate, but if not why haven't the vendors proof-read the blurb? When we were selling our last two houses the EA in each case (different companies) expected us to read through and check everything before the listing went live on RM etc.....

Last time I we actually had quite a lot of input into the way the listing was worded and our agent was determined we should be 100% happy with how the ad looked.

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wowfudge · 03/10/2015 17:23

I've had the EA put the details on RM before I had proof read them - I was not pleased, especially as mistakes had been made with the descriptions of some items in addition to the obligatory typos and grammatical errors.

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NattyGolfJerkin · 03/10/2015 17:39

To be fair,, writing blurb for the average British house is probably pretty dull. Especially when you do it day in, day out for tens of houses. I'd probably get a bit creative to save my own sanity too, if it were me.

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NattyGolfJerkin · 03/10/2015 17:40

Apols for typos (no, I'm not an EA)

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WorzelsCornyBrows · 03/10/2015 17:42

It's barely English! If they want to get creative with their descriptions, they should probably work on improving their language skills first.

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FruSirkaOla · 03/10/2015 18:13

Is anyone old enough to remember the fabulously eccentric Roy Brooks (estate agent)?!

www.roybrooks.co.uk/the-book

www.mortgagestrategy.co.uk/remembering-roy-brooks-the-honest-estate-agent/

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