What phrases do you dislike from estate agents details...

(195 Posts)
KitschinSynch Fri 22-Aug-14 22:01:04

My pet hates are:
"this fine home" related to any Victorian house
"buff interior" buff meaning fit rather than the colour...
I will add more when they come to me smile

mateysmum Fri 22-Aug-14 22:11:57

"Conveniently situated"

Usually means ...on a busy main road, next to a pub.

All depends on what you want to be convenient to I suppose.

KitschinSynch Fri 22-Aug-14 22:15:41

Or near a public toilet maybe?

foxdongle Fri 22-Aug-14 22:18:40

"Requires improvement" = You will spend all your time and money on it until you eventually sell it.

"Flexible accommodation" -usually means they have listed the house as a four bed but the fourth bedroom is accessed from the garage.

"Must be seen" - well yes clearly otherwise how else will you know whether to buy or not?!!!!

FuckyNell Fri 22-Aug-14 22:21:31

'Sort after location' grin

KitschinSynch Fri 22-Aug-14 22:26:31

<snort>

BirdsDoIt Fri 22-Aug-14 22:30:11

'Deceptively spacious' - they mean it's small but looks big, I think - actually means it's spacious but doesn't look it...

JuanPotatoTwo Fri 22-Aug-14 22:37:03

Requires some updating = total shit heap.
Has great potential = is in a right state.
Charming and quirky = dilapidated and falling down.

TheOriginalSteamingNit Fri 22-Aug-14 22:37:53

'Comprising of'

OhBabyLilyMunster Fri 22-Aug-14 22:38:30

Starting sentences with 'having'.... Ie 'having double sockets to hallway.'

AlpacaYourThings Fri 22-Aug-14 22:39:13

"Well presented" - not for any particular reason, they just always use it if somewhere is decorated neutrally.

KitschinSynch Fri 22-Aug-14 22:39:24

I actually have a bit of a problem with 'property' and 'home'. I would prefer 'house/flat/bungalow' but then I like things to be plain and factual.

Our last house was a "handsome executive home". That's code for "lots of dead/unusable/environmentally un-friendly space and grandiose details thought up by someone with no taste and delusions of grandeur".

HowMuchMoreWee Fri 22-Aug-14 22:58:34

Boasts
Charmingly appointed

noisytoys Fri 22-Aug-14 23:03:11

Requires some modernisation - needs to be gutted and start again.

FrontForward Fri 22-Aug-14 23:05:04

Tucked away location down a back alley with no access by car

FrontForward Fri 22-Aug-14 23:07:30

glimpses of the river if you stand on a chair and crane your neck out if the tallest window

ballsballsballs Fri 22-Aug-14 23:07:49

'Benefits from' something you'd expect as a matter of course, like a bathroom.

'Keenly priced' which means they overpriced it in the first place and the vendors are sick of not selling.

iamusuallybeingunreasonable Fri 22-Aug-14 23:07:50

Potential for extension = pokey shithole

Bags of potential = shithole

scottishmummy Fri 22-Aug-14 23:08:09

Do-er-upper= midden
Vibrant location=noisy

Franke Fri 22-Aug-14 23:08:54

Light and airy.

FrontForward Fri 22-Aug-14 23:09:28

a great opportunity to acquire = kid yourself you're getting a bargain because it's cheaper than the neighbours, but by the time you've finished doing it up you'll have spent way more than you should have

FrontForward Fri 22-Aug-14 23:11:33

undergone modernisation but still managed to keep all of it's charactor and charm. Neither modern not traditional. Bit of a hotchpotch

Lucy61 Fri 22-Aug-14 23:16:10

Vendor suited- does that mean a well turned out vendor?!

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