Bought house with parents, now they want their money back in one go.

(188 Posts)
DreamlessSleep Tue 08-Oct-13 11:46:47

My mum and step dad suggested that they helped us buy a house 5 years ago when our landlord was selling the house we were in, but now they want all their money back in one go (70,000 I don't begrudge them for wanting it but think they could have gone about it in a different way) and obviously we don't have this. We tried remortgaging but they won't take their names off the mortgage therefore we cant as they are now deemed too old to be on our mortgage.

Are there any other options I have not thought of apart from from selling? (Which is the option it looks like we will have to go for at the moment.) We were naive when we bought it and in hindsight we should have stuck to renting.

DreamlessSleep Thu 31-Oct-13 06:45:32

I do know how damaging it can be, but hopefully it would be good for the family in the end as currently live 15 mins from town and will be able to move close to the centre so that will be helpful as I cant drive, and the school would be suitable for ds as has special teams and classes to help him (he has higher functioning autism.) Assuming I can get him in that is. Plus will be walking distance of mil and step-fil. (We get on well with them)

Inertia Thu 31-Oct-13 06:55:30

Why on earth are you rewarding your parents for making the children homeless by maximising their payback and continuing to see them? She isn't a good grandparent, she is making her own grandchildren homeless so she can make money. Like previous posters, I don't understand why you are putting the feelings of your swindling parents above the security of your children.

They are going to say that you have cheated them anyway, you do realise that don't you? They expect their full 70 k back so they are going to badmouth you regardless, so you may as well split the losses fairly.

In the absence of a contract, all losses in equity, EA fees, survey fees etc should be split 4 ways between the 4 investors. I would insist on having a contract drawn up to formalise how the money is split before you sell.

ginmakesitallok Thu 31-Oct-13 07:04:09

Have you actually made it clear to them that if you have to sell they will not get their money back?

Do not do anything without drawing up a solicitor's agreement - you should have one, they should have one.

Without that it will a) potentially be very costly b) you risk some sort of money laundering accusation. Money laundering is a 'go straight to jail do not pass go' situation. C) you will fall out with your money grabbing parents anyway as they will feel hard done by.

This is a case where a solicitor is worth however much they cost & will potentially save you a lot of money, stress & heartache.

DreamlessSleep Thu 31-Oct-13 07:25:01

Im definitely not putting them first but its just not that black and white.

they know they wont get it all.

Nothing will be done without talking to the solicitors first.

And do not screw yourself to give them extra. Your relationship is damaged anyway & they will not recognise you shafted yourselves to give them more - they will just whinge that you didn't give them 70k.

If you are going to sell they share the losses equally. (Assuming they have 50% share).

Good - I think you may find the solicitor has different advice. When are you seeing one?

Geckos48 Thu 31-Oct-13 07:34:01

The money should be at least split 70/10, if not more in your favour as you are paying the mortgage and they are not, I assume you can prove the mortgage payments?

I think you need to stop thinking about this as her daughter and start looking at as her someone you have bought a house with. Especially as you plan to have a relationship with her beyond this.

So any improvements you have made to the house you need to add onto your 10k, plus the fees you have had to pay etc etc etc.

Look at it like this, when you leave this house you could have

A) no home, no money

B) some deposit and full mortgage payments to show to another lender who, might WELL be happy to loan you the money for a new house.

This could actually work out really really well for you but you need to protect yourself and your children. If your mother and step-father don't like that, that really is there problem.

PastaBeeandCheese Thu 31-Oct-13 08:46:56

They are absolutely bonkers to turn down your offer of the full £70k back in return for coming off the deeds knowing that if you sell they get less.

You have made clear to them that this severs all financial ties so if you sell and they get less you won't be paying them anymore.

Do you have siblings? What do they think? Mine would be appalled if my parents were making me homeless.

I'm so sorry dreamless.

DreamingAlice Thu 31-Oct-13 08:47:55

Dreamless Is there something else you are not telling us here? I have huge sympathy with how stressful this all must be but I just don't get your reaction to this, since it seems to me that- to be blunt, you are not really acting like a normal person would respond in this situation, which worries me some.

DreamingAlice Thu 31-Oct-13 08:48:50

And I might add that what your parents are doing is also totally bonkers, which makes the whole thing combined really, really strange from where I am sitting. Sorry.

nauticant Thu 31-Oct-13 09:17:44

There can sometimes come the point when it's best to cut one's losses and run. Especially when it resolves a situation that's so stressful it's making someone ill.

So I think we should respect the OP's wishes if she wants to walk away. But she really ought to consult a solicitor and find out what kind of legally correct deal can be presented to the parents. I'd be surprised if the parents would have a legal right to be immune to the effects of negative equity.

giantpenguinmonster Thu 31-Oct-13 20:05:17

OP - I agree you should get legal advice ASAP. But I suspect that they will be entitled to a proportion of the proceeds. So if (for illustration) they put 70K in and you put 10K in and took a mortgage for 60K you would both own 50%. If you sold for less (say $120k) they would be entitled to less (60K).

But most importantly, if they intend to buy another property it will also have fallen in value compared to when you bought yours. So they will get more for their money. If you give them everything, they will actually be profiting for the situation IYSWIM.

Either they don't understand how investments work, or they are being really mean.

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