Can I draw your attention to the utter wanky-ness of this EA blurb...

[kitsmummy]

Not to mention the footballers wives stylie interior....thanks for that John and Lesley - how soon can I book a viewing?.

[onesandwichshort]

Yes, I think that does take the prize. I would also pay them not to decorate my house...

[notsomanicnow]

I can beat that for wanky estate agent blurb...

www.rightmove.co.uk/property-for-sale/property-19493676.html

[dizzyday07]

The bedrooms in my house are bigger than that 2nd property!

[HMTheQueen]

What is that in the "lake" of the 2nd property? And why wouldn't you take the cover off the swimming pool for the photos?????

[nunnie]

The garden has a carpark in it? Not sure why they have left the cover on the pool unless it hasn't been maintained very well it will hide the scum I suppose. And the lake does appear to have something in it that shouldn't be there it doesn't appear to be a shopping trolley though.

I don't tend the read the EA rubbish but after seeing these two I think I will it is always good to have a laugh occasionally. Lets' ask the people that live there who are trying to get out of the property for their opinion because that will be the truth won't it?

[fresh]

I can promise you that somewhere there is an interior designer laughing all the way to the bank....

[MrsTrellisOfSouthWales]

Buy my house! Look, there's a car park in my garden! And a dead whale in the swimming pool! And a UFO in the pond!

[ReportMeNow]

Loving the blurbs.

For a second I thought I recognised the 2nd one. It's very similar to a friends who live in that area and they have a car park for their guests, as in 100s of them!

[Back2Two]

Please buy our house...I don't want to live here anymore as I'm totally freaked out by all the rooms AND the gardens "crying out" to us. I want to live somewhere where inanimate stays that way.

[Back2Two]

Picture 4 of house 1... Look! We've got a tap in the kitchen!

[annh]

"Living here has been everything we thought it would be" says Lesley. Nonsense! No-one actually lived in that house, it was definitely constructed as a film set for the modern-day version of Dynasty!

[onesandwichshort]

And it's in a really wierd place too, Lesley's house, a village that is basically a crossroads on a big main road, miles from any even medium sized town.

[Rhubarbgarden]

Gah, I can't open Rightmove links on my phone anymore. I don't know why - the screen just goes blank. So frustrating! I want to see what is considered wanky description. I very much suspect our agent's description of our house would fall into this bracket (going on my Dad's sniggering 'did you write that...?'

[SoupDragon]

It's so wonderful and they love it so much that they are leaving after less than 5 years...?

[Sabriel]

if they love it so much, why are they moving?

[Sabriel]

xposts Soup

[SoupDragon]

:)

And re Pic 4 for House 1.... if you look carefully they have two taps! And two sinks!! [gasp]

[ExitPursuedByABear]

Fine & Country always do the wanky personal crap in their sales blurb. Makes me cringe.

[GetOrfMoiiLand]

What a pair of wanky houses.

The interior design is completely soulless in both of them. And agree - what the hell is that extension next to the 'georgian' house about?

[GetOrfMoiiLand]

Fine and Country in the Sunday Times property supplement is priceless. It's all Joyce and Nigel have raised their family in their sumptuous Weybridge home.

[frostyfingers]

What GetOrf & Exit said - the blurb in their ads is so pretentious, it cracks me up every time. I can't think what possesses people to use them, it's cringe making!

[gemma4d]

lake? I thought that was just where the garden flooded

[WillieWaggledagger]

They can piss off with 'orangerie' it's just a conservatory