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Moved 5 year olds school and regretting it!

4 replies

Katiejean76 · 10/09/2015 01:56

Hi
My (summer born) son had just finished reception at a school where I had loads of issues with the head/SEN and felt my son and me had been labelled. He wasn't ready to start -I wasn't allowed to defer him- and massively affected his sleeping/ behaviour etc. I always felt unsupported in the meetings and patronised. I also felt they could be quite negative and inflexible. For example my son couldn't cope when reception class moved on to the large playground with all KS1 and so spent lunchtimes on a smaller play area with 2 chosen friends. This made him 'sad'. HOWEVER, despite all this he as very popular, had a lovely group of friends and I got on well with all mums. I made a last minute decision over the summer to move him to a nearby school as they have allowed him to repeat reception and the class size is 20. I felt he wouldn't be labelled there.

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Katiejean76 · 10/09/2015 02:01

...... (Oops!!) SO He has been there a week and has become withdrawn and is having trouble sleeping again. He seems lost and I am Beside myself. I am questioning whether I have made a terrible mistake and whether I should have let him start at the old school and try and work a solution. Has anyone any experience of moving a child and had problems? The schools are literally next door to each other so I'm sure this isn't helping. I am so worried that I have made a decision that could affect his confidence long term and I can't get rid of this sick feeling!!! Help!!!

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fishoils · 10/09/2015 23:23

Katie,

My son has SN. I am guessing from your post that yours does too. I think people would be very responsive to this question if you posted in the SN children's or education section.

We have had similar issues with my son's school. I thought a lot about moving him, but didn't so I can't really be of any help. But I do hope that other people can help you if you post in any of the Special Needs threads.

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Katiejean76 · 11/09/2015 00:38

Hi fishoils!
Thanks so much for posting. I have literally had minimal sleep over this all week but today I had a meeting with the SEN/head of both schools back to back with concerns I had. The new school were beyond caring and seemed to have picked on negativity he has picked up on previously (when she went to talk to him he put his hands up and said'dont touch me'). The meeting in his old school left me cold and wondering why I hadn't pulled him out months ago! I am arranging for him to go to one of the boys homes next week to help him settle in. I am panicking about him being settled but it's a no brainer really. If this school doesn't work out I'll be home schooling him!!! The knot in my stomach has finally gone now I know he's in a more nurturing environment. I advise you to speak to another schools SEN and see how you feel about moving your child. I probably should have done it ages ago.

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fishoils · 12/09/2015 23:02

I'm glad you feel you've done the right thing Katiejean. And I'm sure you son will settle. It has to take a bit of time.

Home schooling is always my back up plan too. I often wish I'd been braver and done it from the start.

However - we were lucky. In that the school my son is at lost it's awful Senco a year ago and a wonderful wonderful new one started there. I can't believe that one person can have changed our experience of school so much. But the new lady seems to have transformed school for my son.

Now he gets so much out of school that I think he'd miss out if I home schooled him. So good luck. I'm sure that your gut feeling was and is right and the different attitude at your son's new school will make all the difference.

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