Started school and sudden bad behaviour

[cheekycherryza]

4yo DD started reception in September and has since then become extremely challenging. Suddenly, she refuses to listen to a word I say. She literally seems to be igoring me half the time. I say something to her sometimes up to four times and then I yell my request at her. This usually gets her upset cos I yelled.

Not only has she just not being listening to me or doing what she's told, she's also been talking way much more than normal. It seems like she doesn't stop for a breath! And when anyone else tries to talk she buts in and then won't let anyone else talk. We worked on this so much last year and she was learning well and waited her turn to speak. She used to put her hand up to show she wanted to talk. I would take her hand so she knew I knew she wanted to talk.... if that makes sense. Now as soon as I try to talk in a conversation with anyone including her she just talks straight over me. And if I try to ask her to wait her turn she talks louder and faster!

And that takes me onto the talking back. Oh my gosh! She argues with me and talks back so bad! She never used to do this! In one month she's suddenly become a nightmare! I get up in the morning dreading interacting with her.

I try to remind her to wait her turn, to not talk when I'm talking, to not talk back to me or argue when I've asked her to do something etc but it's not working. I've even tried praising her when she does wait her turn etc but that doesn't work either.

I don't know if timeouts are going to work for these circumstances. I don't even know if these are developmental issues or a backlash from starting reception. I just know that I don't want to leave them unchecked because if she's like this at home chances are, unchecked this behaviour will spill over into the classroom. She's a very intelligent little girl with lots of friends. She settled into school quickly despite being an August baby and I can't keep her away from wanting to read her school books and practice writing. I just don't understand these behaviour changes.

I just want me sweet little girl back cos I really don't like this pushy, rude little chatterbox.

Sorry for the rant.

[nonicknameseemsavailable]

my guess would be that it is simply a reaction to starting school. She is probably being very good at school and the talking constantly etc is because she ISN'T getting to do that at school and she has so much she wants to tell you that she just can't wait.

[RoganJosh]

Mine have both gone a bit wild on starting school. I think they try so hard at school that it all comes out at home. They're also shattered.
I've tried to lower my expectations, add lots of opportunities for running free and try and get lots of early nights in.
It seems to sort itself out by about January in our house.

[Panzee]

She's knackered! Frustrating though, isn't it?

[cheekycherryza]

Thanks ladies. I was starting to wonder if I had suddenly turned into a horrible parent or something and that's why she was acting up!

[Doodledot]

From what I gather talking to all the other reception mums, it's all normal and settles down soon. My DD was wild for 3-4 weeks but had settled now

[shebird]

I would say it is pretty normal behaviour for someone starting reception. Having to sit quietly and be so good all day takes its toll and the release comes when they get home. I find behaviour dips massively towards the end of each term, even for my DDs who are a few years older so I try to bear this in mind when they turn into monsters. The school term leading up to Christmas seems to be the worst due to it being a busy time at school plus the inevitable coughs and colds at that time of year mine are always in meltdown that last week.

[Iggly]

Normal! Ds is doing similar. He's tired and wound up....

[OrangeyTulips]

ds the same. school said it was entirely normal and is a result of finding his feet and the tiredness of attending school. I'm cutting him some slack at the moment.

[hiccupgirl]

My DS is very similar tbh. He's arguing about everything he can and is so loud all the time.

I've given up trying to ask him to do things at the mo because he will just refuse and telling him ends up with an row too. Instead I do lots of 'I bet you can't do it before I get to 10' etc or 'oh no' I think you're too little to do x'. Both of these get him going like magic currently so I'm making the most of it.

[mummytime]

I think all children go through a developmental stage about the time of starting school 4/5 ish. This can lead to them testing boundaries etc. Add to this meeting children from different families, with different bedtimes, rules etc. And some of those children have older siblings.

Well it all means DC can become more challenging when they start school. They also get tired. Are tired and hungry (and maybe even dehydrated) at the end of school. They are learning to keep themselves under control for a 6 hour day - so it all bursts out on you. The first few days of the holiday can be tricky too.