What do you think of this teacher behaviour?

[vapourviper]

My DD yr1 told me about two things that happened at school today, both of which have worried me so I am looking for other opinions. Firstly the class teacher started crying in class today and said 'I'm rubbish', apparently this lasted for about a minute and a TA took over and then everything was fine (of course details are scant from a 6 year old). DD loves teacher and school and has had no problems with teacher but I am now worried.

Second thing is the children moved up a class after lunch to try out the class they will be in next year, the teacher took the register and made jokes by getting children's names wrong. He called one child First Name Dog as her surname is simiarish to Dog (two letters difference), this made the girl cry and the teacher then hugged the girl and she was ok. I don't really know what to think about this.

Would you do/say anything about either of these things?

[littlesupersparks]

It's near the end of term. Everyone is knackered. I'd buy the teacher a box of chocs, write her a card saying your kid loves school and leave it.

[susiedaisy]

What are you worried about exactly?

[middleeasternpromise]

If on average the year has gone well and DD is seemingly OK what is to be gained from investigating further? Obviously keep checking in with DD with specific questions and if the reports are consistent for regular bizarre behaviour then its time to 'have a word'!

[Nishky]

Perhaps the teacher thought she was pronouncing it correctly if only two letters out?

[vapourviper]

I thought that the behaviour seemed a bit unprofessional/unhinged but am reassured to see that I am being unreasonable. I was just worried about the children really.

[vapourviper]

Nishky, No it was a joke as he was doing it with most names, obviously just a bit misjudged.

[Hulababy]

2nd teacher - I assume he thought it was a joke and the children would find it funny. Most would IME. Child who cried was probably a little over sensitive for some reason - he (teacher) comforted her and all was okay. Looks like teacher's style will be a relaxed jokey one so hopefully the little girl will come round to it

1st teacher - I would be really concerned for the teacher's well being. Sounds like she is having a tough time for some reason. Reason could be anything - work based or home based. Difficult situation for her. I wouldn't complain at all. Hopefully the TA was able to give her support during the day and others in school too.

[MrsKCastle]

The first one- well, it happens. But I'd be worried that the teacher wasn't feeling very well-supported. It doesn't reflect well on the senior management if they have a teacher breaking down in lessons. (Although there may be personal circumstances that you're not aware of).

The second one- if the teacher really was joking about the kids' names, that's not on. I'd be pretty annoyed if I met someone for the first time and they 'joked' about calling me the wrong name. Names are important.

[Jinsei]

Re the first incident - I would think poor woman, sounds like she really needs a bit of help or support. I'd buy her a nice gift, wish her a good break over the holiday and hope that the TA followed up after the lesson to check she was ok.

Re the second incident, I would think it was a bit of fun that had gone rather wrong - a bit misjudged, obviously, but no real harm done.

[littlesupersparks]

I'm just writing as a teacher who has broken down in front of her class... One particular occasion was awful but honestly I was under the weather, exhausted and felt like giving up. That was several years ago and I am fine right now. Honestly if your child loves her, now might really be a good time to let her know...

[hiccupgirl]

It's the end of a long summer term - I'd cut the teacher some slack. She's probably exhausted and struggling with another week or so to go. Or there may be things going on in her life that you have no idea of but she has to keep going. Hopefully after the break she'll be back on form.

The other one sounds a bit odd but this is a 6 yr olds account of the day. I used to teach yr 1. I had a parent come and ask me if it was true that I ate cakes while the kids had their healthy snack because her DS was adamant I did. Obviously I didn't!

[Iownafourinchporsche]

Your teacher is probably utterly exhausted. She's probably been working 7 till 7 most days and needs a holiday

[DeWee]

On the first, I remember a very strict unemotional teacher at secondary. I'd had her in the first year, and when I was about third year, one Monday one of the other forms came out saying "Miss. X burst into tears-we weren't doing anything..."
They thought they must have been doing something terrible, and were wondering what trouble they were going to get into. I found out a little bit later that she'd had a miscarriage at the weekend.
My dsis had a teacher (also at secondary) who suddenly disappeared leaving them with a prefect one lesson. He'd just had a message to say his wife was in a car accident and not expected to survive the hour. (she did, and by the time I had him he'd returned to the fun teacher he was naturally, but my dsis thought he was terribly bad tempered and mean)
Teachers are human too and you don't know what's happened to them.

The second I'd take as a joke that went wrong. Ds (year 2) and his friends would find that hopelessly hilarious. Even my over-sensitive dd would at worst be rolling her eyes and correcting the teacher, so I'd not think of it as a dreadful thing to do, and certainly not one I'd worry about.

I don't think you do anything. First one, you have no rights to know what's happened, teacher is probably very embarrassed. Second one there's nothing to say.

[Elibean]

First one, if it's a one-off, well it happens. Teachers are human, and have ishoos like the rest of us, and it is not necessarily a sign of lack of support. But if it happens again, I'd express concern for her well being and, if it carries on, the well being of her pupils.

Second one, silly mistake and hopefully teacher will be a tad more careful.

[TheGonnagle]

I broke down in front of a group of students three days before I was rushed into hospital with kidney disease. I was just so tired and sore and carrying on and carrying on and then - BOOM! I was crying.
They were utterly brilliant about it though (secondary).
It happens. Unfortunately life throws us these moments occasionally, I'd assume teacher needs a big hug- lets hope she got one.
The second one is a badly judged joke with a sensitive child. Sounds like hugs put that one right.

[itiswhatitiswhatitis]

First one I wouldn't say anything it's the end of the year if all has been well til now then I don't see it as a big issue for your dd.

2nd one well if the parents of that child want to raise it that's up to them. Not sure why you think you need to? Sounds like a silly joke that got taken badly

[PastSellByDate]

Vapourvipour:

In terms of your DD's teacher being upset - well if your DD thought she was lovely why not encourage her to make a card saying so to give to her teacher next week. My bet is that will mean a lot and cheer her up.

Teacher's get it wrong - it's not ideal calling someone DOG and it probably will stick for a bit - but then someone else will say something and that will be the new 'funny nickname' for someone and the 'storm' will blow over.

It's not ideal - but as someone suggested - it's the end of the year, enthusiasm for the job is probably pretty low and people are really tired. It's also been really humid (around here at least) - which never puts people in the best of moods.

Try to not worry about this over the rest of the year (just a few days) and try to give the new teacher a chance (rested after a long summer break and refreshed/ recharged they may just turn out to be the best thing for your DD's next stage of education).

HTH

[RitaConnors]

I wouldn't say or do anything about either of them. The first one was upset. It happens.

The second one was making a joke, trying to put the children at ease. No doubt the little girl will either get used to him next year or her own parents will take it up with the school if she doesn't.

[squizita]

They thought they must have been doing something terrible, and were wondering what trouble they were going to get into. I found out a little bit later that she'd had a miscarriage at the weekend.

This has happened to me - I was upset because I'd had my (3rd) miscarriage. I'm secondary pastoral care/management- not known for my delicate nature- and was discrete but a child saw. A pushy mum rang me to give me patronising 'advice' (someone who was known to use the PTFA as a power trip IYSWIM). By then I was together enough to calmly explain what had happened and inform her that I hoped she would be discrete herself.

You just don't know. Odds are she's just knackered.

The second one needs a little bit of guidance about "OK jokes" and "Not OK jokes" ... I can provide some flashcards if he needs.

[Makingchanges]

Sounds like the teacher was trying to make the children relaxed by joking about getting names wrong. I often do similar calling children different names and having a giggle. The teacher will probably feel bad that the joke was taken the wrong way by the child. I wouldn't be concerned about the hug, most ks1 teachers would do similar. I'd be more concerned about the first teacher who seems to be having issues at the moment. Possibly something that as a parent it's not your place to query but hopefully she is getting support from elsewhere or will be grateful when end of term comes.