Do schools need to know about parents' criminal convictions?

(40 Posts)
Runoutofideas Mon 18-Nov-13 16:53:35

I have discovered something today about the father of one of my dd's closest friends. He was convicted a few years ago of something which I would consider would put his children at potential risk of serious harm within their home. Would school automatically know about this, and if not, should I say something? The child's attendance record is poor, but child seems well cared for and is lovely to speak to. My dd has been to their house on numerous occasions, but will not be going again following what I have found out today. Trying to be a bit cryptic to maintain confidentiality but I don't know what, if anything, to do!

LumpySpacePrincessOhMyGlob Mon 18-Nov-13 19:31:56

Maybe you should just be up front and tell the mum your concerns.

VerySmallSqueak Mon 18-Nov-13 19:44:18

If you are concerned that he is re-visiting his violent past,I am not sure I would want to be too up front tbh.

If I was going to pass my concerns on I would probably do so quietly.

rwepi Mon 18-Nov-13 19:46:41

I think you should call SS. If they already know then no harm done, especially as the information is already in the public domain. If they don't then you may have helped.

I wouldn't tell the school. SS will if they think there's a need. The only "action" the school can take is to tell SS.

soundedbetterinmyhead Mon 18-Nov-13 19:53:35

If the name and address has been reported in the papers, I expect the mum won't be at all surprised for you to approach her and explain that although you value her friendship, you're going to have to redraw some boundaries in the light of how this information makes you feel about your DD going to her house. If you do this sensitively and privately, she might be relieved to talk to someone about it - it's a big load for a non-offending partner to carry.

There's no need to tell the school though - if you have any concerns about the child, ring SS - they'll take an anonymous referral.

Runoutofideas Mon 18-Nov-13 19:56:43

Lumpy - I think that might be a very bad idea! I just don't know what he is capable of, and don't want to get on the wrong side of him.

Thanks all for your comments.

Lakota Mon 18-Nov-13 19:58:05

I'm guessing this is a conviction involving drugs - the making of them in the home? I agree with soundedbetterinmyhead re how to handle it, if asked why your daughter isn't visiting any more.

Lakota Mon 18-Nov-13 20:01:31

Cross-posted.
In that case I would always have prior engagements if invited, but continue to be friendly and welcoming and issue invites to your own home. They will probably know why you've stopped letting your daughter round but be relieved you haven't nixed the friendship altogether. Anon call to SS for any ongoing concerns re the child's safety in her own house.

FrussoNeedsGin Mon 18-Nov-13 20:11:32

Why don't you ask the mum?

Runoutofideas Sun 24-Nov-13 12:14:55

Just as an update for anyone who commented on this thread - sorry for being so cryptic but it appears there was good reason. I mentioned to the head teacher that I was concerned about the child as she had been absent from school. The mum and children are currently being protected by the authorities and it is doubtful that the child will return to school. Feel desperately sad for all of them and hope that they are able to have happy, fulfilled lives in the future.

CloverkissSparklecheeks Mon 25-Nov-13 12:04:19

I am glad you mentioned it and I am shocked people on hear are saying 'beak out' etc. When it comes to safeguarding children (or anyone for that matter) then minding your own business does not apply EVER. If there is a misunderstanding or nothing untoward is actually happening then that is fine if you have dealt with it in the correct way ie going to a professional such as a HT or SW rather than accusing or gossiping then there should not be a problem

You should never go home worried about the welfare of a child!!

Runoutofideas Mon 25-Nov-13 12:48:31

Thanks cloverkiss. I now feel really bad that I didn't try to offer the mum more help before. She and the children have clearly had a terrible time. I hope she stays strong, stays away and is able to rebuild their lives. Now I just need to break it to my dd that her friend is not coming back..... sad

CloverkissSparklecheeks Mon 25-Nov-13 15:14:59

I think it is very difficult to offer help early on as you never know what the reaction from the family themselves will be. I think we are all very cautious about getting involved especially when many peoples opinions are that it is none of your business.

You shouldn't feel bad as you didn't know the situation before and once you did you talked to someone about it.

titchy Mon 25-Nov-13 16:47:30

Clearly a very sad situation for that family - but someone actually told you the family was under some sort of protection? Jesus I hope whoever told you isn't always such a blabbermouth- its disgraceful that a professional should have told you such obviously confidential information.

titchy Mon 25-Nov-13 16:47:54

Clearly a very sad situation for that family - but someone actually told you the family was under some sort of protection? Jesus I hope whoever told you isn't always such a blabbermouth- its disgraceful that a professional should have told you such obviously confidential information.

Runoutofideas Mon 25-Nov-13 18:15:51

Titchy - it became necessary because of the current behaviour of the dad. Person who told me didn't really have much choice in the matter at the time.

Join the discussion

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now