School are failing DS - he's about to see Camhs and they won't even get SENCo involved - even though hes SA and has an IEP.

(47 Posts)
youarewinning Thu 04-Jul-13 21:32:21

How on earth can a school who has a child who now is seperated at break/lunch due to social communication difficulties and resulting meltdowns still not have the SENCo involved?

I've asked, I've asked for IEP for behaviour/social problems, I've asked for statement - NOTHING.

Currently he spends lunchtime with a buddy of his choice, in library or courtyard, supervised indirectly by lunchtime staff in hall which is adjacent. (not entirely appropriate I don't think considering he carries an epipen in school) This was agreed at last meeting and he was susposed to be the permanent buddy of a pupil already segregated for different reasons. I was led to believe this pupil has a 1:1 so DS would be supervised. This didn't work so we now have this situation.

Even his teacher said the other day it's not a long term solution. But she hasn't arranged a meeting like I asked. I've asked head and SENCo to call. Nothing from head and SENCo asked office to tell me no point as she doesn't deal with him. angry

Help please.

mrz Sat 06-Jul-13 06:30:35

Do You mean Educational Psychologist rather than SENCO?

youarewinning Sat 06-Jul-13 20:24:01

No SENCo - I have never met her. I asked to meet her last week after many requests and office informed me message from SENCo was - there's no point as she has very little to do with DS and doesn't see him. I pointed out I wanted the call because I want to meet with her to discuss social needs of DS - especially now Camhs are involved as they'll want information from school. I asked if they could get head to ring me so I could arrange this through him. DS teacher spoke to me Tuesday and said driers toon not long term solution - I agreed and I said to arrange to meet.
DS asked his teacher about being allowed some time outside with friends and teacher told him she'd need to speak to me first. Still hasn't contacted me.
I sent s note in Friday about calling me to arrange meeting about moving forward - still nothing.

Sorry if it sounds like I'm ranting at you - I'm not (honestly!) I'm just fed up with a total lack of support.

I have a child who spends half his life looking like a rabbit in the headlights imunder any social situation who cannot communicate effectively with his peers now they are maturing in their social development. He's being left behind and it seems no one gives a shit sad

youarewinning Sat 06-Jul-13 20:25:35

Driers toon?! = separated!

mrz Sat 06-Jul-13 20:38:27

I'm a SENCO and can't believe a school works this way shock Contact Parent Partnership for support in arranging a meeting.

beautifulgirls Sat 06-Jul-13 20:48:21

Why don't you pop over to special needs children as a topic and post over there. Lots of parents there who will have advice as many of us have faced issues with schools and provision for their children.

I would personally book an appointment with the head, don't let the office know why if they ask, tell them it is personal and don't be fobbed off with them telling you they can't book you an appointment. Stand firm until you get that booked and then when you have the head face to face tell them exactly how things need to be and that you are not going to stand for your child being excluded from his peers at lunch time with no efforts to support his obvious needs. In addition those days where he is not going to go out to play (and he will stay in some of the time most likely even with support in place) then he is not being effectively supervised given his known issues, and that as the school are in charge of his health and welfare you will hold them responsible for any issues resulting from him not being properly cared for. Failure to even try to support his social issues meaning that he is isolated from his peers is basically disability discrimination. Put your foot down and insist that the SENCO is involved from here in getting the appropriate support put in place now.

Don't pussy foot around, say what you want and what you expect. If the school haven't listened to tactfully put requests then it is time to get tough.

youarewinning Sat 06-Jul-13 21:12:57

Thanks mrz I called Thursday and left PP a message. Call back is 2-3 days. I can't believe they've worked like this either.

youarewinning Sat 06-Jul-13 21:14:16

beautiful Fab post> I may print that and read from it to the head!

beautifulgirls Sat 06-Jul-13 22:01:20

Feel free - you need to stand firm with some schools. We were lucky and had an infant school that supported DD well and listened. When she moved to the linked Junior school however entirely different story. You can do this and don't feel bad for standing up for your child.

sbutton Mon 08-Jul-13 20:46:49

I'm having the same issues with my sons school. He is having separated breaks/lunchtime too because he ends up fighting and getting angry.

I've asked the school to get the senco involved, emailed the head -nothing back sad spoke to teacher expressed my concerns ie dyslexia etc.

I am also at the end of my tether. These replies are very helpful.

Hope you get something sorted soon xx

popgoestheweezel Tue 09-Jul-13 12:14:20

sbutton, forward the email to the head again and politely but firmly ask for a response asap. It's shocking to not reply to a parent.

youarewinning Tue 09-Jul-13 20:50:13

Have rang school - apparently SENCo not in much so they haven't had a chance to catch her yet. hmm

Re iterated how important it is with Camhs appointment coming up - did point out Camhs will come in and want to see what strategies are in place and how they work wink

Parent partnership rang Monday - they were shock at the fact SENCo not already involved. Case worker is ringing me soon.

Good luck sbutton hope this thread helps. Stick around - ak any questions you want.

MisForMumNotMaid Tue 09-Jul-13 22:59:12

It is a school based thing but at my DH's school you can't have a responsibility point i.e. be SENCO unless you work full time.

Keep going. Some times it doesn't feel like it but you are making progress.

Not trying to bang on but did you follow the call with an email?

I.e. just to confirm what we discussed at x time on y day. School have been unable to communicate with SENCO.

Please could you confirm that these questions are passed to SENCO and a response is made by the end of this school week due to the approaching summer break.

We wish to ensure we start the new academic year with a clear plan with targets identified.

mrz Wed 10-Jul-13 17:30:21

Is it a state school?

youarewinning Wed 10-Jul-13 20:58:42

yes state school.

And good news grin

After ringing again yesterday and following up with an email - school rang me today to make an appointment for tomorrow after school with current and future teacher and SENCo. I may have mentioned in call and reiterated in email that Camhs would want to know what school are doing - as he's segregated- and so far we have nothing documented. wink grin

So points for discussion:

DS entered year 3 a 2b writer, ended year 3 a 2b writer. Still 2b in year 4 midyear. I pushed for IEP and SA (SEN register). DS still 2b writer.
So, school disputed his level when he entered (this was after 18 months at school on same level and me asking why). I agree he wasn't even a level 2 - more a 1a but............. why has he made only 2 sublevels in 2 year3 (if you use a 1a) instead of expected 3 and why hasn't anything been done as he should be making accelerated progress.

What support, what IEP will be drawn up for social needs, how will they ensure he is adequetly supervised if he' segregated due to his medical needs?

I'm going to be firm - I am not going to accept no problems at school when he has them everywhere else, even his cubs group are aware of how socially unable he is.

MisForMumNotMaid Thu 11-Jul-13 21:06:22

Good news.

I find it helps my train of thought if I make simple notes before meetings. Sometimes with several others (on the defensive) in the room, I get a little flustered. After I leave I go through all the things I planned to say or how I could have answered back with witty retourts.

Having bullet point notes gives me the guidance to keep things on my track.

If the cubs leader is up for it, getting a few lines written of unusual or different behaviour in comparisson to observations of peers behaviour could be beneficial with CAMH's building a picture.

Sounds like you've really got the bit between your teeth now. Good for you.

youarewinning Thu 11-Jul-13 22:00:21

Meeting went fairly well I thought.

Agreed plan of action including getting DS on PAVES again, regular intervention by ELSA (who apparently already pops in to see him when she has time hmm - first I've heard of it). I suggested red/green card for getting help when he couldn't communicate, he's going to have phased and supported inclusion back into the playground with his peers. I suggested a visual timetable and timer so DS knows what he has to do and can see the time pass, then he gets adult support and then has to work alone again. His teacher then mentioned how he needs to know exactly how much he has to do, eg how many sentences he has to write, or how many lines, or how many questions he has to answer. (again first this has been mentioned). I did say he likes a challenge so if they wanted him to do 15 questions, tell him 10, if he's got them right give him a reward and offer him further reward for doing 5 more. His new teacher does raffle tickets for a raffle at the end of the week. I said this would work, however if a week is too long for him as turns out its not tangable enough could we agree a number of tickets he has to get daily and he can have a daily reward - eg 5 minutes computer time at end of day? DS does not handle verbal praise very well at all. confused.
Teacher agreed when I suggested his literacy skills being poor due to the fact he lacks the social and emotional language, she mentioned (again) the fact he does not read fiction - but did admit they have tried at school too and it's been a failure - for the first time I didn't feel like they blamed this on me. I even told the SENCo how I had got beast quest etc - she said that's usually the one that encourage boys! It was agreed it seems he doesn't get interested in fiction and he doesn't get the characters, and even when reading fiction text for comprehension his answers are more factual than feeling. Teacher agreed with me that his imagination is limited to what he knows as fact.
I asked that any work they do with him at school on social skills, and they are going to do work on how to ask children if he can play, I get a copy for home. I said it would help if we all did the same things and would be easier for DS as transference of skills and linked up thinking is really poor in him.

Interestingly enough his teacher totally sees and agrees with me about what I see in him, the anxiousness. I asked if she has observed how his eyes dart around everyone in a group, how his twiddles his hands or fiddles, how he plays alongside but not with people, how his facial expressions don't always match what he's saying and his tone of voice. We did say how we find it interesting how he doesn't read social clues off other children but seems to get adults. She also mentioned about hi wide eyed shocked look he does at times - often when he's spoken to and seems to correspond with him not knowing how to translate what been said and answer.

SENCo said "It'll be interesting to see what Camhs say" confused

MisForMumNotMaid Fri 12-Jul-13 22:39:47

It will be interesting to see what CAMHS say. Just a quiet, hopefully friendly word of warning about CAMHS, it isn't a one appointment then recommendation kind of place. I had one meeting with a lovely lady, who then allocated the case to another lady. She then met with me, me and DS, DS at school, me several more times getting the history, got reports from all professionals involved with DS then proceeded with recommendations that were agreed at whatever the meeting is they have and then we got a thick draft report to review make comment on, then a diagnosis report. In our case ASD, ADHD, Dyspraxia and Meares Irlen.

Today was good progress. Its always nice when the topic gets beyond politics and everyone actually talks about the childs needs.

Does he have the same teacher in September?

Do you feel good about it?

You're defiantly the one in control now. Hopefully you can wind down a little now and enjoy some of the sunshine over the weekend.

BackforGood Sat 13-Jul-13 16:20:31

Glad to hear you've made some progress.
What I would do in future though, is make a point of recording the time and date and name of person who is telling you things, like "SENCo isn't in much so haven't had time to catch up with her" and "there's no point as she has very little to do with DS and doesn't see him", and let them know (if it's by phone) that you would like their name as you are making a note of the message, as you do with all messages and replies form the school. I find it tends to focus the mind.
I also find it helps if you arrange the next meeting whilst you are all in the room at the first one..... so I would have said "Can we all meet up on 19th Sept then to check he's settled in OK, that x and y are running and see if there have been any issues with his transition that we can iron out then, once his new teacher has got to know him".

youarewinning Sat 13-Jul-13 20:05:22

Great advice back but SENCo is retiring at end of term. She is going to pass this in to her successor. He also has a different teacher (which is a good thing as current ones a drip!)

misfor it will be interesting. I suspect well end up heading down the asd route. DS is a carbon copy of my brothers mate who has AS. The pair of them together are hysterical - it's like the enter some parallel universe!!!!
I'm aiming for support most and formost but understand that there's sometimes a dx at the end of it. I reckoned the process would be at least a year? I'm hoping the fact I have to apply for secondary school place next year means they'll sort it before then. There are some fab schools with attached units round here but in not sure if I would have to apply for one when normal applications ate out through or if he's statemented during that year he can still get a place? I know it sounds like I'm jumping the gun but ill do everything I can to get what's right for my boy!

youarewinning Sat 13-Jul-13 20:07:41

I did get his school report yesterday. Was quite interesting!!!

2a - writing
3c - reading
4c - maths.

Achieving in other subjects and exceeding in ICT!

BackforGood Sat 13-Jul-13 22:38:39

If I've read it right, your ds is just finishing Yr4 ?

If it were my child, and I thought he might need specialist provision, I would be applying for Statutory Assessment NOW. (Parents can apply to the LA, it doesn't have to come from the school).
In my Authority, parents of children who have a Statement are asked about secondary provision in the Yr5 review. All other children need to apply for secondary schools by the beginning of October in Yr 6. You can't get into a Resources Base, or any sort of specialist provision without a Statement. Here (although there are a couple of excellent advisors on here who say there can be exceptions - I've never come across it) you can't leap to the top of priority admissions without a Statement.... you will end up in the queue on siblings, then distance, etc., rather than being able to select a more suitable school.
Getting a medical diagnosis will not = getting a Statement, that will have to be applied for as a separate thing.
It takes 26 weeks from when SA starts, until it is complete, but if you are waiting for the school to have a new SENCo start, and then wait for an EP referral (who may well say they'd like to see the IEPs running for a bit before taking any further action), you are risking your Statement not being in place in time to get any priority choice of secondary.

You're certainly not jumping the gun, it sounds as if things should have been moving a long time since, if you feel he needs speicalist help for secondary.
Apologies if I've mis read anything - it's just I know parents are often surprised how long all this stuff takes, and how far ahead you need to be making sure things are moving in the right direction.

youarewinning Sat 13-Jul-13 22:44:02

I've been asking about statement all year - apparently they are hard to get. He is finishing year 4.

I have options appointment with camhs in sept and definitely going to apply for statement as soon as we have a plan of what they are going to do. At least then ill have back up. Thankyou

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