'I want a new school with harder work'

[SylvanianFamily]

So how do I deal with this?
Specifically, my Y2 DD says:

• she gets fed up of the other kids always asking her the answers;
  
• she wants to move on to division, but the class 'has' to stay on multiplication; and,
  
• the teacher 'doesn't believe' her group when they say they have finished their 'reading book' 'six times' (no, I don't quite follow either).
  

She's kept bringing this up since the start of the year and I feel I have to respond in some way to her concerns. AFAIK, there are no 'social' problems driving this - she has a close best friend who is also a 'nerd', and several other chums across different classes.

At parents evening last term, the teacher said she was streets ahead on reading (and indeed was the class talking-dictionary for tricky words), and keeping up well with the top end at the maths. I believe she does find the work easy - although she is also getting a touch conceited about it. She also has some clear weaknesses in my eyes, like handwriting and fluency/speed in doing sums. She has a super full out of school program, including language, music, sport and drama.

[bodenrefuser]

insist the school gives her work to challenge her, or move schools. keep her in the school till the end of the year. but, look into academically selective schools. a high sats score might help you get a bursary in an independant school. etc. Just basically, explore what the other options are.

[SylvanianFamily]

I don't really want to move her. Our school is lovely and all my DC are happy there. The local private school seems to be run on a policy of 'death by homework worksheet', and very narrow 3Rs target driven approach - I prefer to find her reading her own books and writing letters to the fairies in the evening, not be arguing with her about schoolwork. I'd rather address it where she is - but I'm worried about how to intervene effectively.

The teacher specifically said 'I won't let her coast'. Should I ask for a meeting? Or write a letter? Doesn;t feel right to ambush him on the door.

[SnapFrakkleAndPop]

Can you give her extra reading and start division at home whilst incentivising the not-so-hard work she does at school like speeding up sums and rewards for good handwriting?

The reading rhe same book 6 times (or however many) is a concern though. There should be no problem with letting her move onto another book even one at the same reading level just so it's new material. Alternatively she should be doing extension activities with the book as a theme to help her practice handwriting etc.

[brimfull]

I would ask for meeting with teacher and talk about getting her some extension work.
Also work on her areas of weakness .or maybe develop new skill outside of school .

[SnapFrakkleAndPop]

Ask for a meeting and say you're worried she is coasting at the mpmemt, you understand she might be ahead of the class but can she not do slightly more difficult work like multiplying bigger numbers. Same skill being reinforced but more difficult. Or word based multiplication problems.

Ambushing on the door isn't fair, a letter might be seen as aggressive.

[bodenrefuser]

meeting. always go the official route.

[CaptainNancy]

You need to meet with her teacher and ask what they think they should be doing to stretch her. She is going to end up hating school otherwise [bitter experience]

[deepdarkwood]

I would drop the teacher a note asking when you can have 5 mins, as it sounds to me like there might be some different issues here:

• your dd being used as a mini-TA (which some children love & get a lot out of, but it sounds like she's had enough. This may be something the teacher can help lessen)
  
• not being given appropriate extention work
  
• discrepancies between where the teacher & your dd thinks she's up to
  

I'd go in gently - never helps to rile teacher at the first meeting, imho - and go in with the attitude that your dd may have misunderstood some things.

I would express concern that she's talking about getting bored, and that you want to help support the school approach. SO you need to understand it. SO, how explicitly are they stretching her in: maths; literacy; theme work etc. what could you be doing to support this at home? How do you know what she's studying at school (eg. shared learnign platforms/accessible teacher planning for the class?)

[deepdarkwood]

DS is doing division, btw - bog standard Y2, and he's top/second set depending on the week.

[Ealingkate]

I don't think it should be an issue of extension work, they have enough prescribed work to do at school (or would in a ideal world), it's more about her being engaged at school and not becoming cocky.
I feel it is infinitely more valuable for her to develop her own interests and hobbies out of school, rather than trying to make up for her not having interesting work at school.(Not that I'm suggesting that the OP has said she wants extra schoolwork)
If the teacher wants them to stick to multiplication then he could give her more difficult sums to do.
The bright children need just as much time spent on them to keep them engaged, as the less able students need help to stay on track.

[SylvanianFamily]

While I think she does have a point about being able to do more work, I also think conceit might be blocking out her perspective and room to grow.

I don't know if it is relevant to note that one of her other v. close friends (older year group but same CM, so spend a lot of time together), has just been diagnosed with severe dyslexia. This girl really struggles with reading - fears it - and I get the idea that she gets quite down when she sees my Dd precociously reading in two languages. The difference is become quite pointed as they are maturing.

[SnapFrakkleAndPop]

This is where good extension work will stop her becoming conceited. She might be able to do multiplication tables or 2 digits by 1 digit but can she do 386472 x 7 as quickly as she can 3 x 7 or 38 x 7?

I think she might be fixating on what she's 'got' much quicker than the rest of the class and thinking that's where it ends.

But at the end of the day if she wants to lean more, if her intellectual curiosity is leading her towards, say, division, which is a logical follow on from multiplication, that needs to be fed or she will end up disinterested and unmotivated.

[SylvanianFamily]

Would it be fair to ask the teacher to hold her to a higher standard than her peers?

I struggled with this just before parents evening: would she feel picked on if 'good enough' from others wasn't 'good enough' from her?

I'm thinking specifically handwriting and good layout of work? With the maths, she was proud of a commendation that she had for independently figuring out quicker routes to do her sums - so I think a little bit of that is happening already.

Also maybe relevant to note: she does not take criticism altogether well! At her Saturday language school (as hard-nuts full-on academic high-aspirations as you could possibly imagine for a 6 year old), apparently she sometimes hides under the desk if she's not getting the work right.... Which is kind of why I originally chose quite a soft-touch caring school for her, so that her learning is driven by her own enthusiasm to do extra private reading etc, rather than by obligation and fear.

[mummytime]

Keep her at the present school but ask them to stretch her. If she is keen to do division do it with her at home. Ask her to explain to you (or Teddy) how to do something she finds easy. What does multiplication really mean etc.

I wouldn't worry too much about handwriting, as she may find it hard to have her hand keep up with her brain. I also wouldn't worry too much about the arrogance, but do teacher her to be kind. Let her find at least one thing she finds hard, and get her to work on that and to understand how other feel. Get her to try things she is not naturally good at, sport or art or writing neatly (maybe calligraphy).

She should be being marked against her own targets not generalised ones for the class, so a good when she does well for her (if a bit neater or doing hard sums).

[wheelsonthebus]

Can you do the 'stretching' at home? But some Bond workbooks above her age group and get her to do them by herself?

[mumof2littlegirls]

I have DS in year 2 also - they have a Gifted and Talented program in school, which identifies and challenges children who perform at levels higher than expected. Could you ask your school if they have such a program?
Also, DK do some great cross curriculum project books for children 8-12 which are designed to stretch children and allow them to learn at their own levels. Sounds like your DS is ready for something like this.

[seeker]

Bear in mind that when ds said he was fed up of "helping the others" it turned out that the others were fed up of ds "helping" them as well!

[Acanthus]

Been here, done this! I think the best approach is to explain that all the children are learning lots of things all the time at school. She is lucky because she learns (eg) the maths quickly. She also needs to learn to be kind to people, write neatly, not show off, whatever. Make sure she is given harder work by all means, but focus on the other stuff too.

Standards at state schools for bright kids are pretty low though, because they are only assessed up to level 5 in the published tables which a bright child can easily reach by the end of yr 4. The school has no incentive to take them any further, so they mostly don't. But come secondary school there is so much more content even the very bright ones have enough to do.

[taffetasplat]

quick hijack, sorry -

Acanthus - our school has a reputation for what you talk about. What can you do between Y4 and Y6 to ensure that secondary isn't too much of a leap?

[munstersmum]

Just been through very similar with yr2 DS. Each child gets personal goals & earns team points on achieving them. He was reading his goals & saying "I can do that already" and he could, having been streamed(!) in a different state primary last year. I said nothing last term as teacher told me they were letting him coast a bit to ease the change of school which was I think thoughtful & helpful.

I did just have a quick word at the end of the day last week about the numeracy one & she said it was a whole class goal so I thought I'd tried but not handled it very well. To her credit she tested him that week & amended his goal. So have that word as diplomatically as you can & I hope you get an equally positive outcome.

[munstersmum]

should have said new goal is division

[BeenBeta]

Sylvanian - we have been through this with DS1 and got the scars.

We moved from one city to another and DS1 went from a very academic school to a mixed ability school but with small class sizes in Year 4.

Given the small class size we expected the teacher to naturally tailor the work to each pupil's ability level. Stretching those at the top and giving more remiedial work to those who were struggling. It didnt happen.

The problem I supect you are facing is that we faced. The teacher was only targeting up to but not beyond the required standard for Year 4 children so once a child reached that level (which DS1 had by mid way through year 3) she just let them coast along and focussed her attention on the children who needed more help.

We badgered the school for 18 months before anything was done about it and we are still livid. It was not until DS1 told us he was sat looking out of the window for most of the maths lesson that we knew what was going on.

He was very bored and demotivated and even started pretending he couldnt do the work to stop other children asking him the answers and making fun of him.

Dont ignore your DD or be fobbed off as we were. Move her to a more academic school if the current school do not take immediate action. We were made to feel like pushy parents and that we were being unreasonable but it was DS1 who was doing the pushing - not us!

[Acanthus]

If you are doing lots of stuff out of school I think you will be ok. We are in a Grammar school area so it didn't seem odd to DS to be doing work at home to prepare for entrance exams. He did music theory to grade 3 and his instrument to grade 4, but not the other stuff you are doing. Yr 7 is always a bit of a shock anyway, I think!

[mrz]

Acanthus there is nothing to stop state schools assessing children to level 6 7 or indeed 8 if children are working at this level.