"Exceptional circumstances?" holiday in term time - need advice what to tell school!

[DoodleNoo]

My DCs school has always had a relatively relaxed policy towards holidays in term time (within reason) and has been quite happy to authorize up to 10 days away. However for whatever reason, this year they have tightened up considerably and recently sent home a rather fierce letter stating that they would only authorize leave of absence in "exceptional circumstances", and only if the child's attendance (through their entire time at school to date) was above 95%.

My problem is an annual trip, with extended family, which is a lifetime tradition for me (30+ years) - as well as now my kids too - based around a particular public event which happens to fall in term time. It?s a really special time for us & more important in our family than spending Christmas together. Always in the past, throughout my own education and my children?s, we?ve been and it's not been a problem. I bend over backwards for the rest of the year to support the head and school in every other way: we?re never late, we support all the school events, I volunteer, DCs always do their homework beautifully, and are doing well in class - in many ways we are the model parents: I know that, and the head knows it too. We would never choose to break the rules or go against school policy - but I now just don't know what to do about this year?s holiday (especially in view of the fact the problem is going to arise again in subsequent years).

Frankly, there?s no question of us not going for a truncated week (4 days off school - though had hoped to take 6 or 7 before this change of policy came up) - for that I will willingly run the risk of fines and Education Welfare officer visits (not that these have been threatened, but I?m aware that this is the usual route in some other schools). Other than this regular annual period of absence, DCs attendance is excellent - faultless this last calendar year - but illness / this same trip in previous years means that at least child won?t hit the magic 95% attendance required by the school before they will even consider granting my request.

So:
Should I write and explain what I feel are the exceptional circumstances and see if they?ll grant me 4 - or more? - days leave? But then my intention is all in writing and evidence against me in anything else that I subsequently do.

Or should I talk to the Head first? (problem is that I?m feeling very emotional about it and am liable to bust into tears!).

Or should I do nothing and just phone in both children sick when the time comes - which will be very see-through as the head will know where we really are, I am sure - it?s a small school and she?s not stupid - but if I send them back with sick notes after a nasty dose of ?chickenpox?, what could she do?

And, if I do ask, don?t get and still take them anyway - when & what do I tell the school?

Be really grateful for your thoughts / opinions. FYI, DCs are Y4 and Y1.

[bumpybecky]

I don't think you should lie to the school about illness as it's obviously not true.

If it were me I'd write a letter to the Head explaining my reasons and say that you're willing to discuss them in person. Hopefully if the Head knows the reasoning, you'll be less likely to cry. Ask for the time off, but don't expect to get it approved. I'd assume that it will be turned down and would be budgeting for the fine (from memory £100 per parent, per child, so £400?!)

When is the time off planned? is it going to be an issue for exams / Sats in the future?

[GypsyMoth]

I think it's a tradition you are going to have to drop tbh!!

[scurryfunge]

Just explain to the head in a covering letter your reasons for going. It may not be authorised but I do not know anyone who has been fined for a one off event.

[gramercy]

The thing is, what if everybody wanted to do this?

And you say it's a lifetime tradition, well, what if somebody else wants to start a "lifetime tradition"? The school can't say, "I'm sorry, but DoodleNoo's family has already bagged the lifetime tradition slot and we won't authorise any more."

[LaurieFairyonthetreeEatsCake]

You are not going to get fined for a one-off event.

There is no need to get emotional. It is unlikely to be authorised no matter what the reason - it's not about what you are choosing to do.

You have decided to take them anyway so write a request, it will likely be turned down and then just inform them that you are taking them.

Have a good time.

[thenightsky]

What time of year is it? Will it clash with exams in coming years?

I think you may have to drop your 'tradition' or move it to official holiday times if that is possible.

[Acinonyx]

We had something similar last year. I wrote explaining we were visiting family and why the timing. It was unauthorised. We went. End of story.

You won't be fined for one trip.

[Blu]

Are you going to keep this up through GCSE etc?

[KnowNothing]

Is anyone else dying to know what the tradition is?

My guesses are
Tomato throwing in Spain
Cheese rolling in Shropshire
Kiddies beauty pageant in Las Vegas
Summer solstice at Stonehenge
Glastonbury

But seriously, is it an event which ever happens elsewhere, could there be any sort of compromise. Join your family for the weekend before/after instead?

You have nothing to lose by requesting the time away being authorised.

[MumNWLondon]

Sorry but I think you are being a bit unreasonable especially as your kids get older. Can the family not reschedule to be in school holidays.

I have a letter in waiting for authorisation for DH's cousin's weddings overseas, DD (Y2) is a bridesmaid. But its a one off.

I think speak to the head and see what she says before you book.

[GypsyMoth]

A yearly event isn't really 'exceptional' is it??

When is it and where?

[cedar12]

It will be marked as unauthorised if there attendance below 95%, I think they can only fine you if attendance drops below 85% though.

[FlorenceAndTheMachine]

[thenightsky]

Well if it falls in June every year, problems will occur at GCSE level onwards.

[GoldFrakkincenseAndMyrrh]

I also think it depends when it is, what it is, where it is and why it's a tradition.. Anything from April on is going to cause issues in later years tbh and what happens if they miss, say, an assessed science practical? Or coursework done over a short time period in school? Is it always going to be term time?

At some point I think you'll have to drop it but not necessarily this year.

[Buda]

Do other family members not have the same issue?

[Acinonyx]

I wonder if this event is in the us where the summer holiday is 3 months - this causes us some difficulties too.

[gramercy]

DoodleNoo isn't going to tell us, is she?

Now we're all imagining a vast gathering of DoodleNoo family members at the World Squash-growers Convention or... is it that Groundhog Day thing... ?

[Marlinspike]

Schools' attendance stats are monitored, and there is evidence that time missed contributes towards lower achievement - although maybe the evidence isn't so strong in the Primary phase.

I agree with other posters - if this is an annual event your dilemma will get worse, not better. Once GCSEs become an issue you will find the pace and pressure of work ramps up; there's lots of end of unit assessments and coursework, and your DCs could be missing either an important assessment or a key piece of teaching.

7 days' absence over 5 years at high school = 35 days - that's pretty much a half term...how would you feel if their teacher had the same family tradition, and missed this time?

[activate]

they can't do anything

they will just mark them as unauthorised

there will be no other action taken

it affects the school's attendance figures and not your kids' records unless of course the rest of their attendance is poor

I would write and say that you appreciate that they have changed policy but you have a family commitment and will be taking the children out for these days - take all the ones you want

they will write back and say unauthorised

just say oh ok

and go and have a nice time

[activate]

EWO is only interested under 90%, under 80% can be legal action

95% is target attendance for the school which is above the national average tbh

[stLucia]

If you ask and they say no, don't go and take the time away and try and fob it off as an illness, though.
Either drop the tradition or just go anyway, unless they're missing an important test/exam then it isn't going to matter.

[pooter]

just go! School is not the be all and end all! Your children will gain more from being with you and continuing an obviously very important family tradition than doing the same old stuff at school.

Can't believe some people think that school is more important than family time! You obviously put a lot into the school and their formal education - one week will not ruin everything!

(ps - im an ex teacher) enjoy yourselves :-)

[HappyMummyOfOne]

Weddings, funerals or a serious illness are classed as expeptional circumstances by our school, everything else goes unauthorised.

[MistyB]

The law (Education Act 1987 I think) allows Head Teachers to approve up to 10 days absence per year. AFAIK the law has not changed. What has changed is the pressure on schools to improve attendance records. AFAIK fines relate to unauthorised absence. I would have a reasoned discussion with the head teacher.