school toilet rules - is this common practice?

[mamasmissionimpossible]

DS (4) has just started reception this week. I took him in today and he said that he needed the toilet and could I take him. I was going to take him inside, as I would usually, but the headteacher stopped me and said I was not allowed to go inside the toilet with him, in case of any other children being there (there wasn't)

Is this common practice in schools now? I did feel a bit take aback when he said I wasn't allowed to take my own child to the toilet.

What next, a CRB check for every parent?

[scurryfunge]

He could probably go on his own at that age so there wouldn't be the need for anyone else anyway. Bit over protective of the headteacher but you didn't need to go.

[aegeansky]

It is normal practice for everyone entering a school to require an ECRB when in a position to be left unsupervised with a child. I don't mean yours, clearly, but the head meant that there was a chance you might.

So her reaction was entirely appropriate. The alternative is to be supervised wherever you go.

[mamasmissionimpossible]

It is only his second day at the new school. So I think he was feeling a bit anxious and wanted me nearby.

[sereka]

Odd.. at my little neice's school she just started reception has well. pooed herself and they didnt bother to change her saying they are not allowed to touch the kids. What is this health and safety coming to eh?

[spanieleyes]

If you think that's daft!

We have a child who needs to attend a Special school 2/3 times a week and has to be taken by taxi. The taxi company refuse to take him without an escort ( as he has behavioural difficulties), the LA refuse to pay for an escort-they insist he doesn't need one.The child's Mum offered to go with him ( she does't drive so can't take him herself) and they refused because she isn't CRB cleared, even though he's her own son!

[mrz]

I'm afraid that under new Safeguarding rules the head had to act as she/he did. However when your child is in school it is unlikely anyone will accompany him to the toilet so it is a good idea if he learns now.

[mamasmissionimpossible]

I am so shocked at how much things have changed in schools. I think it's taking child protection too far to say a parent can't take their child to the toilet. I realise the headteacher as he directed, but I just felt like I was being accused of some terrible crime for wanting to accompany my ds to the toilet.

[Mspontipine]

Hmmm by accompanying your ds to the toilet though you were possibly going to be accompanying other parents' dss to the toilet too. You wouldn't have known the toilets were empty until you'd actually looked inside. Parents don't want strangers hanging around toilets their dss are in. That's what you are. Head perfectly reasonable and you should feel reassured by his attitude towards the personal safety of each and every one of every other parents' dss that are under his care.

[Mspontipine]

...and all the little dds too of course :)

[Mspontipine]

If I ever needed to take my ds to the toilet in school we would both go into the self contained disabled loo.

But I guess that's a whole other thread in itself ....... :)

[brassband]

I can't imagine why you'd want to go into the toilet with him.I mean he goes by himself during school hours surely.

[LutyensCBA]

We had an "Introduction Talk" with dd's class teacher last week and she basically asked us not to accompany our children to the toilets (while dropping off/picking up) to foster their independence. They would not be accompanied during school hours and if the parents maintained that practice it would reinforce the rule. Apparently they had a few students in the past who didn't like to go alone so simply held on till their mum/dad came at pick-up time to take them!

So while the rule exists in dd's school, I wasn't given the impression it was due to H&S or CRB reasons.

[pinkmagic1]

Strange really. When my DD was toilet training and I went to pick DS up from school I would quite often have to use the toilet with DD and this caused no problems. Things have gone a bit too far imho.

[onimolap]

It can't be a universal policy, as there's no such rule at our school.

[mamasmissionimpossible]

brassband - I wouldn't normally accompany my ds to the toilet in school. I just wanted to in this instance as he seemed a bit anxious, as he has only just started at the school and didn't know where to find the toilet. I felt he wanted me to be there for him. Will leave him to go by himself from now on.

[mrz]

onimolap your school faces an automatic Ofsted "fail"

[TrinityTheLonelyBrokenRhino]

I can totally understand why the headteaher had to say that

and there was no reason for you to go to the toilet with him

[Goblinchild]

As Mspontipine said:
"by accompanying your ds to the toilet though you were possibly going to be accompanying other parents' dss to the toilet too."

We have that rule, that way no parent can be upset by the presence of another adult in the toilet at the same time as their child.
It's not just about you and your child's needs any more.

[onimolap]

Maybe; but as there is no central edict on this (unless someone can cite a new DofE regulation), then it is up to the school to show how it manages risk.

Perhaps layout plays a role?

But if this takes root in schools, then how long before it does in other places? Will "child only" loos become the norm?

[Goblinchild]

In an unprotected environment such as shopping centres, all small children are accompanied by their own adult. In schools, children are sent to the toilets on their own or with a friend. Our reception has 'ensuite' facilities, so when they wander out with their trousers round their ankles, help is at hand.
Schools tend to respond to issues rather than create them for the most part, 20 years ago this would not have been a consideration.Parental concerns have driven many of the H&S rule creations. And the need for all accidents to be attributable and someone held to blame.

[onimolap]

I was wondering how many cases there have been of assaults on children in school loos by an adult parent/carer. Anyone know how widespread it was, when changed policies came in, change in number of attacks since ban, and current different rate between schools with and without the ban?

I doubt anyone here would have the mind if an abuser, but why would anyone assault a child in the school loo (where there are loads of people around and constant likelihood of interruption), when it would be much easier to invite children on playdates and access them then?

[Goblinchild]

When did logic and common sense ever have a bearing on these sorts of issues?

'OMG! OMG! Will No One Think Of The Children?'
Maude Flanders lives on

[strawberrycake]

I visit a lot of schools, and yes some do now have child only loos. There are signs that adults are not to use them and must use staff loos.

[Goblinchild]

That's common though and has been for years. Different to accompanying someone to the toilet.

[saggarmakersbottomknocker]

onimolap - the edict is an interpretation of the rule that all adults in school in sole charge of children have to be CRB checked. If you are alone (ie not with another adult)with a child who is not your own on school premises than you should have a CRB.

If parents at our school wish to accompany a child to the loo then they are directed to use the disabled toilet so they aren't in contact with other children.

As mrz says it's a safeguarding failure in the eyes of Ofsted.