I am sure that this is a very common problem, but writing to get advice and partly to vent.
My DD is in Y7 and seems to be seriously struggling with her friends from Primary school. She has always had 'best friends' and is much better in a one-on-one situation, so is finding is quite tough transitioning to a more group dynamic at secondary school.
Basically they are just not that interested in her. She frequently sits on the school coach on her own whilst her friends sit as a 3. If she asks them to sit with her they say no or pretend not to hear her. At lunchtime they disappear and don't wait for her and if she asks to sit with them at lunch often the seat is being 'saved' for someone else. Yesterday she told me she was walking along with someone but when another group went past the 'friend' just joined the other group without saying anything.
I have tried to be positive in the hope that she finds a way through it and things improve. But it seems that it is getting worse. DD doesn't want to go to school and I had a text from the school telling me that she wasn't in registration (although she has registered for lessons).
She is doing well in school otherwise and the confusing thing is that outside of school she gets on well with these girls. She is invited on occasional playdates and sleepovers but I sometimes think that is because she is quite popular with the parents, or maybe she is useful if no-one else 'cooler' is around. She does activities outside of school with some of the same girls and it is fine. It just seems to be school..
Her self esteem is plummeting and therefore she is struggling to make new friends which obviously we are really encouraging her to do.
I don't know if I should speak to the parents (who are friends), but I know they will speak to their children but surely that just makes it worse?
Thanks for reading.
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squirrelspatchcock · 19/01/2017 11:48
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