10yo DS, puberty & low self-esteem

[EssieJay]

My 10yr old DS, usually a relaxed, easy going little man, is struggling at the moment and I don't know whether it's puberty, a recent house move or something deeper I need to be more worried about.

Last night he asked me to read some notes he'd written in a little notebook he keeps by his bed. It said that he thinks he is a monster, and that he is lonely at break time at school because no-one wants to play with him. We moved to the area about a year ago from a different county.

I chatted with him this morning about why he considers himself a monster and he told me about an incident with a football and another child who got hurt in the playground. sounded like playground antics to me and the teachers have not raised any issues with his behaviour with me.

I'm putting it down to raging hormones as he says he has all these feelings he can't put into words.

Compounding everything is his dad in the military who is away for 6 months.

Any thoughts? Is it possible it's just a combination of crap in his life absent dad, house move, puberty)?

[Schwabischeweihnachtskanne]

I'd assume it's a bit of all 3 (but boy hormones shouldn't be raging too much at 10). I'd focus mainly on the move though assuming he's used to his dad being away for long periods.

Have you tried the usual inviting classmates over after school/ in the holidays to build up friendships and finding out if there is an after school activity boys he likes/ gets on ok with that you could enrol him in too? Around here the boys are thick as thieves with their out of school football team mates (girls who play are the same) and for boys especially it can be an automatic peer group - in your area it might be a different sport/ martial arts/ scouts or whatever but it's worth looking into.