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how much freedom DD 11 years old

3 replies

pandora987 · 21/10/2014 10:50

MY DD has just started secondary school and wants to go out around the village with her friends after school and weekends. She takes her phone with her, but last week came back and said she and a friend (also 11) had been in the woods about half mile away playing hide and seek and had seen a tramp in there and had run away. I don't mind village/park but lonely woodland? She is sensible, I know she needs freedom, but I am freaking out until I hear her come in the front door. I have set some rules about where she can go, and got a tracker app for her phone.
What limits has anyone set their DD's - and when do they get freedom to go to town alone, take a bus, walk to friends house across busy road etc. I know this is just the start of it and in a few years she'll be out all night! Gulp...

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GooseyLoosey · 21/10/2014 10:52

I let my ds (Also in Yr 7) go around the village but am very clear where he is allowed and where he is not. He can go to the park, he can walk to friends or the shop but he absolutely cannot go down in the woods or across the fields. I have also pointed out to him that it is a small village and I am bound to find out if he does something that he should not. I think he sticks to the rules.

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starfish4 · 21/10/2014 10:59

My DD is 13 and I wouldn't want her going to the woods and even if I agreed, I would want her to let me know she was going there and with who.

I agree village/park is fine and ask her to tell you if she's going anywhere else. It's always handy to have the telephone number of other parents, so you can check with them if you are concerned. Some are allowed freedom earlier than 11, but I think once they start comprehensive school, then you have to accept they're crossing roads by themselves, so if it hasn't happened before, she should be allowed to visit local friends even if the road is busy. You can always make suggestions as to where you think is safest to cross. I think my DD was just 12 when she went into town with her two friends. I know others were going earlier though.

As I said my DD is a little older now, but I still like to know where she is going and who with.