My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Parenting a preteen can be a minefield. Find support here.

Preteens

can anyone tell me when their 11 year olds:

39 replies

bella1968 · 04/09/2014 12:24

go to bed
have their tea
discipline their children

please and thank you.

OP posts:
Report
MerdeAlor · 04/09/2014 15:17

My ds (11) goes to bed at 8.30 weekdays and 9.00 at weekends.
We eat sometime before he goes to bed.
Discipline? Restriction of computer time.

Report
minkah · 04/09/2014 15:19

8.30 bedtime.

Eating, 6.30.

Discipline = removal of privileges.

Report
Rummikub · 04/09/2014 15:19

9 ish bed time weekdays. Probably after ten at weekends.
Tea varies, but we all eat the same and together.
Discipline? Depends on what and why, but yes removing technology works best.

Report
StillWishihadabs · 04/09/2014 15:25

Ds is still 10. Dinner is 8pm bed is 9pm during the week, lights out 9pm.
Discipline removal of IPAD time, or bed 30 minutes earlier for each misdemeanour.

Report
bella1968 · 04/09/2014 16:01

thanks for the replies, seems like what I'm doing isn't out of the ordinary then!?

OP posts:
Report
Lasvegas · 04/09/2014 19:37

Eat at 5.30 depending on after school activities. Bed at 9.30 to 9.45. Up in the morning at 7. 40 am.

Punishment never taken place. We do argue though over lack of music practice.

Report
ChildrenOfTheDamned · 04/09/2014 19:49

DD goes to bed around 8.30 on a school night, but will watch TV in bed for around half an hour to 45 minutes, so lights out around 9.15.

Usually have tea around 4.30-5.

She's a pretty good kid, so a telling off is usually enough. If not, losing screen time will work.

Report
ChildrenOfTheDamned · 04/09/2014 19:50

Oh bedtime at the weekend is usually 10-10.30 depending on how tired she is.

Report
Fairylea · 04/09/2014 19:51

Bed is 8.30 weekdays and then read for half an hour. Pushed back half an hour or so at weekends.

Dinner we have at 7 pm.

Discipline - removal of wifi and tablet!

Report
Fairylea · 04/09/2014 19:53

Meant to add although dinner is 7pm I usually do her a smaller portion of whatever ds aged 2 has for his dinner at 4.30/5ish as she's usually starving!

Report
ChiefBillyNacho · 04/09/2014 19:59

Bed at 9. Eat sometime before - we are just getting into a routine having moved in with dp - half six to eight. Discipline - withdrawal of screen time or pocket money.

Report
bella1968 · 05/09/2014 10:31

thanks for the replies, very helpful. Smile

OP posts:
Report
HavanaSlife · 05/09/2014 10:36

About 8.30-9

4 as thats when the toddlers eat and hes hungry then anyway

Loss of computer time

Report
AmysTiara · 08/09/2014 07:58

About 8-8:30 bedtime but its later thurs, fri and sat.

We eat tea around 6pm.

No computer time but he's a very good boy so rarely needs this.

Report
ElephantsNeverForgive · 08/09/2014 08:19

11y Y6 or Y7?
Makes a huge difference.

I still tried to chase DD2 Y6 to bed by 9.30, in Y7 it was likely to 10-10.30 and I really stopped worrying.

She has a night owl big sister and instilling an earlier bedtime just because DD2 is younger has never been worth the hassle, since She is the one who bounces up in the morning.

Tea varies due to after school stuff and wether it's something that's easier to do when DH is back or not. ie. 4.30-7.30pm

Discipline, I shout, I send DDs to their room, but in all honesty I'm very lucky, both my DDs are very reasonable most of the time.

DD2 was cheeky and awkward at 9/10, as many DC are, but with the freedoms and responsibilities of Y6/Y7, especially being able to stay home on her own, walk to the shop etc. she felt less babied and suddenly grew up. One day after a spectacular out if control tantrum she just said sorry and never (touch wood, she's now 13, did it again).

Very occasionally, due to not putting washing away, her lap top walls for a few hours.

In any case both DDs know that I hold the ultimate card. We live in the middle of nowhere. No mummy taxi, no fun. Neither has ever choose to em vole that one.

Report
ElephantsNeverForgive · 08/09/2014 08:19

Chosen to invoke that one!

Report
jaykay34 · 08/09/2014 09:52

I have 11 year old b/g twins.

Bedtime: All tucked in at 9 on weekdays but may take till 9.30 to fall asleep. Son will sometimes gi to bed earlier if he's tired...daughter has to stay up till 9 regardless Smile . On a weekend, bedtime can be as late as 10 - or 11 if having a sleepover. They do tend to lie in if bed time is later.

Tea-time: Between 6.30 and 7.00pm - as soon as partner comes home from work.

Discipline: No wi-fi or tablet.

Report
minkymuskyslyoldstoaty · 08/09/2014 09:58

1.9.00 ish
2.6 ish

  1. um as and when, but try to not be too in her face, as at this age she needs to learn from mistakes too. if that makes sense.*


*(minefield!)
Report
caringdad66 · 08/09/2014 13:56

bed at 930pm.....lights out 10pm......eat at 8pm.......discipline-loss of devices and x box.........

Report
bella1968 · 08/09/2014 15:34

wow, I've always been told that my children go to bed earlier than everyone else, looking at all your replies it's more true now! mine have always gone around 7.30, it's only recently crept to 8 and 8.30 sometimes 9 because of afterschool clubs which start around 6pm, cubs and guides etc.

So if I feed them even as late at 7.30 and they go to bed between 8 and 8.30 then that seems to be ok for their age? obviously if they are tired and want to go to bed earlier or I can encourage them if I see they're tired then I will.

Elephantsneverforgive My 11 year olds have just started secondary school.


thanks again for your replies, very helpful

OP posts:
Report
rollonthesummer · 08/09/2014 15:43

Bed-8.30
Dinner-5.30/6
Discipline-erm, I never have really. She just does as she's told! She sometimes moans, but still does it! I feel v lucky now!!

Report
DottyDot · 08/09/2014 15:46

Last year, my year 7 eleven year old went to bed at around 9.30pm, had tea at about 6pm and discipline is a mix of removal of screen time/going to room.

This year, at the beginning of year 8, it's pretty much the same!

Report

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

GooseyLoosey · 08/09/2014 15:50

Ds (yr 7) goes to bed at 8.30. Reads until 9.15.

Tea depends on what he is doing, but usually around 6.00pm.

Discipline is loss of Ipad access. Other discipline relates to what the problem is - eg if he won't do music practice, I don't pay for lessons. If he won't do homework I write "couldn't be bothered" in his homework diary (or at least I threaten to - it works like magic so far).

Report
brittanyfairies · 08/09/2014 15:54

My 12 year old goes to bed between 8.00 and 8.30, always asleep by 9.00, but he has to get up at 6.30. We eat dinner around 6.00, 6.30. Punishment is a loss of technology - but he's a good boy and I rarely have to implement it.

I'm less strict at weekends but 9.00 is the usual bed time, but if we're out or with friends I wouldn't enforce it.

Report
Poledra · 08/09/2014 15:58

Bedtimes will vary depending on what time you have to get up though - previously, DH and I both worked full-time at a distance from home. Now, DH works from home, and he drops the children off to school. As they get up 45 minutes later than they used, they now go to bed later. This is a bone of contention to 10-yo DD1 as her younger siblings go to bed later than she did at the same age but that's the way it goes.

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.