Is this unusual for 9 year old girls and how to handle?

(11 Posts)
Kissandhugs Fri 13-Jun-14 23:53:16

Have been mulling this over for a couple of days. My 9 year old came home from her friends house and told me that the other girls shared a secret with her. They pulled down their pants and tickled each other's front bums!!!! They asked my dd did she want to join in - which she didn't. This took place in a semi public place. We spoke about respect, for ourselves and each other, about being able to understand things ie emotional maturity. Keeping herself safe. And basically told her to call me to collect her if she finds herself in that situation again. I am taken aback by the behaviour , sad that my 9 year old has been exposed to this. Any other advice how to handle other than removing herself from the group. The other girls prefaced sharing their secret by saying this is a bit gay!!! Some of the other parents are medics and very open in terms of education so don't suspect anything untoward in their homes iykwim.

Thanks for any advice.

Lagoonablue Fri 13-Jun-14 23:57:35

Tricky. Sounds like you gave her good advice. Don't think it is very unusual for a bit of experimentation even at 9.

Would I tell the parents? Probably bit in a tactful way. Perhaps they need to have the talk with their kids about being safe and what is appropriate.

HeeHiles Sat 14-Jun-14 00:02:49

I'm surrounded by 8 and 9 year old girls all the time and even though they are curious this behaviour is way out of their league. I would be shocked - Were these other girls her friends too? Does she know them well?

Lagoonablue Sat 14-Jun-14 00:06:23

I am no expert in this age range apart from my own experiences and know there was a bit of this opinion my peer group.

Kissandhugs Sat 14-Jun-14 00:11:48

Thanks for your replies. They would all know each other fairly well. My lo would be on the periphery. got feeling it was being driven by one child in particular. Would be exceptionally tricky to speak to parents so am sort of burying my head in the sand and looking out for my lo if that doesn't sound awful.

Think will minimise contact with the group unless I am supervising.

Thanks again.

HeeHiles Sat 14-Jun-14 00:31:24

Could you speak to someone at their school?

Catticals Sat 14-Jun-14 00:34:41

Kissandhugs, take it in to school. It isn't necessarily anything other than play but is a bit unusual. Taking it into school would be appropriate...

Alita7 Sat 14-Jun-14 19:25:52

I agree that if they go to the same school then talk to the school.

I don't think this is normal behaviour but who knows these days!

Kissandhugs Sat 14-Jun-14 21:02:49

Thanks for all the replies and advice. Will pop into school and maybe keep it non specific - v tough as I know that main child involved is very close to the teachersad. Thanks again . I didn't think it was really appropriate either but wasn't really too sure.

Hatetidyingthehouse Fri 20-Jun-14 20:25:29

Speak to head of year at school as they would have seen it all

yoyo27 Sun 22-Jun-14 18:31:07

I don't think it is appropriate, but I remember experimenting with a friend at a sleep over one night when I was young!! Just harmless I would think but something the school needs to address

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