advice please, DS aged 12 and sleepover

(6 Posts)

This morning Ds was invited to stay with a friend tonight, Its a school friend that he says he gets on with, they are in the same social circle, go to the same parties and and I share lifts with his Mum who seems nice. He has never stayed there before and this friend has never stayed here.

He went over there at 3 this afternoon but then called at 6 and demanded to be collected. I said fine but asked him why? he said he just wanted to come home.. on my way to collect him I spoke to the friends Mum who said she had no idea what the problem was, she thought they were fine and playing on the Xbox, she didn't think that they had fought or anything.

When I got there DS couldn't get out of the house quick enough so I just said that I would call the friends Mum when I knew more and left with DS.

DS is being very cagey now. He says he felt bored and homesick. I asked what they did and he said they played Black ops and some medieval war game that I didn't catch the name of but suspect that it is a 15 or 18 cert. He said that he told his friend that he didn't want to play violent games but his friend ignored him (I don't let him play or watch anything 15 or 18 cert at home but I know I can't control this out of the house, I'm actually quite proud that he is self regulating).

DS says that he felt uncomfortable in their house and just wanted to come home. DS is inclined to be very sensitive and slightly over emotional so I have accepted his explanation.

I find his explanation a bit sketchy but thats normal, I'm happy to collect him if he's not happy whatever the reason but I now have to give an explanation to the Mum. I'm not good at this and have a tendency to just blurt out "DS was bored in your house" or even worse! Please help me to be diplomatic about this, what do I say?

sausagesandwich34 Wed 02-Jan-13 19:16:13

I would say ds felt uncomfortable playing 18 rated games

rather that than say he was bored

I didn't want to make it sound like I'm criticising her parenting, she is obviously happy about the 18 rated games.

I think he just changed his mind and wanted to spend the evening in front of the TV at home, we have barely been at home all Christmas and the kids find that hard work.

FannyFifer Wed 02-Jan-13 19:51:09

I would agree to say that he was uncomfortable with the violent computer games.

sausagesandwich34 Wed 02-Jan-13 19:52:27

the norm amongst DD and her friends is that if there are any films/games over the age then the parents check with each other that it's ok

I would be livid at 18s being shown/played and would want the other parent to know that

OK, thanks. It just seems to be the norm that every parent of his friends seem to not mind these games, I feel like such a prude about it. But you think I should stick up for myself and let it be known that I'm not comfortable with violent games.

I'll broach the subject tomorrow.

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