12yr old DD and tampons(26 Posts)
My 16 yr old started her periods over 6 years ago and has never used tampons. She prefers to use sanitary towels.
I use tampons.
DD2 is 12 and started her first period yesterday.
Today she is wearing a towel but as she goes swimming a lot I mentioned to her about using tampons and she was quite keen.
Now to my question.
What is the best way to help and advise her on how to use and to insert tampons?
My mum was no help whatsoever when I was younger and I ended up finding out about tampons myself when I was 16 and had been having my periods for years.
I think that if you make the mooncup normal for your Dd's then it will be normal. Also, teen girls do spread the word about all kinds of stuff, so we might actually find that mooncup use becomes far more the norm in future generations <crosses fingers>
I had heavy periods and so started using tampons from an early age. I found it helpful to use a little bit of Vaseline and so for a while I carried a little jar around in my school bag - you can always pretend it's for chapped lips.
Not long after I started my periods I wrote to all the brands and they all sent me samples. Mum would only let me use towels (she'd been in a dorm when the girl in the opposite bed went into TSS after losing the string - I assume that back then they didn't have the string sewn all the way through?) but when I was 13 and had gathered bit of a stash of free tampons (the samples sent me, plus "party bags" from sex ed) I decided I didn't like towels and gave it a go. I started with the tiny none applicator lilets but they weren't big enough for me, didn't take long until I was on Super applicator.
Now I love my mooncup and wish I'd discovered them sooner! I think I'll give my girls the option as they get older, maybe not at 12. They're so much easier to use and unless you're on a massive bleed you could put one in before going to school and empty it when you get home. Not to mention how much cleaner they feel, which has got to be a good thing for a teen.
I used tampons from age 11/12 (can't remember exactly but only a few months after I started) - non-applicator ones. I seem to remember I got it worked out after about half an hour in the bathroom with the little leaflet in the Lil-lets packet, which had diagrams.
I expect some of the books on puberty will also have tips, and no doubt somewhere on YouTube there will be a demonstration video (there is for just about everything else...).
My slightly older cousin came into the loo with me to show me how to insert a tampon. My niece taught my dd how to use them. (apparently, tampon usage is handed down from older to younger women in my family..) perhaps having a seasoned tampon using friend or relative might helpful to your daughter?
Much as I love the sound of the mooncup I dont think many teens would be keen to use them at school tbh.
And solo, I love the idea of a mooncup, but I have tried to use them and I find I am too sensitive in that area around my period and using them is way too painful. I have since found out I have endometriosis so this make sense, but I also thin I would have been a bit freaked out by a mooncup in my teens - they are a bit more fiddly than tampons and you do need to have a good awareness of your body (I gave them a good go in my twenties).
I learnt about how to use tampons in sex ed at school, from friends and from the instruction leaflet! My mum, who is quite young and fairly liberal (or so I thought) told me that only women who had had children could use tampons! This really annoys me actually as I went through a family holiday at age 12 avoiding the pool and trying to hide my massive pads leaving my younger bro very puzzled as to why I wasn't splashing away in the pool as usual! Eventually I told my mum I thought she was spouting bollocks after reading some teen mags and made her buy me some tampons. She was still adamant that I most certainly could not use "super" despite my flow being very heavy as they would be too big for me! In a misguided attempt to preserve my "virgnity" I was not allowed to use the sanitary protection suitable for my needs, which actually made my period more of a bigger deal than it needed to be and made the whole thing feel rather sordid really.
I would suggest just being frank with you dd. Tell her all the options available, what the pros/cons of each are and tell her you will support her in whatever choice she makes and provide this for her. I doubt she is naive in this area anyway what with the internet and info from her friends.
I'm hoping that when my Dd starts her periods, that she will be able to use a mooncup because I wish so much that I'd known about them way back when started.
I was 13. I remember the agony of trying to insert the damn things (a few periods in as my Mum thought that 'young girls shouldn't use them' <I think she thought if I knew how to insert one I'd be rushing around doing the same with penises?!>.
I tried every position I could think of. Wailed to Mum I couldn't do it. She offered a few more suggestions - standing with one foot up on the bath blah blah and I still couldn't do it. She gave me some KY jelly too, but I didn't use it.
Even now I struggle if I'm not 'wet enough' (sorry if TMI) so I can't use them at the very beginning or very end of my period. I would give her some lube and explain that it's OK to get it covered with it, especially while you are learning how to get them in the right place. Even now I struggle a bit sometimes.
Much much better than pads, but not without their hassle. You could always try getting her a mooncup.
Hopeforever - thanks for those links, I have a DD who hasn't yet started but I think the lil-let's site is great to show her and hopefully it will help.
My mum left a box of tampax on my bed and I remember spending what seemed liked hours in the bathroom trying to insert my first one, it was agony. Surely when they are so young they have to break the hymen! It's horrible when they are still children.
DD likes the Tampax ones with the soft-ish plastic applicator, she can't really use the cardboard ones.
I threw DH and the boys out and shouted the instructions through the bathroom door.
She does still like to wear a towel with it, in case of leaks.
My dd was going on a school trip to a watersports centre a month after her first period so she started using tampons straight away. We tried various sizes and brands and got through LOTS to start with - she just shut herself away in the bathroom until she got the hang of it. She uses tampons with no problems at all now.
I used tampons from the first day of my first period and so am slightly anxious that when DD starts her period, she may not be quite so gung-ho about using tampons (and why anyone would use towels is beyond me).
Anyway, can you give your DD a small mirror and tell her to go and have a look at herself so that she can figure out her anatomy (if she's not already done this)? Also, give her access the booklets and websites etc that have been mentioned?
My mum was great, if a little brutal - welcome to 40 fucking years of bleeding and gave me a box of tampax and showed me the instructions an said get yourself in that loo and don't come out until you can do it.
(Worked for me!)
Go to the tampax website. They have good info and a great teen range you can find in Boots etc
simbo thank you! I'll have a look next time I'm in town although our Boots is quite small.
dippywhentired - I was exactly the same. I had spent years trying to insert tampons. After I lost my virginity I figured I could fit a tampon up there.
Thank you for the help.
She's not the most confident of children which is why I was hoping for a magical solution.
I'll sit down with her and a box of tampons tonight and see how it goes.
If that fails I'll see if her older sister can be of any help because although she doesn't use them regularly she as used tampons on the odd occasion.
I'm not ready to have two daughters having periods!
I've only just got used to my eldest having them and she's been having then for over 6 years.
My children are growing up!
I have also had to address this issue with my dd (13) as I didn't want periods to spoil our summer holiday. She doesn't like to talk about this stuff so advising her was difficult. I bought her a "teenage tampon kit" from Boots. I think it is by Lilets, but has different types of tampons ie digital and applicator in a pretty bag with explanatory leaflet. Then I just let her get on with it. She still prefers towels for regular use (bizarre) but has access to both.
If you are interested, I think the kit is an ongoing item (turquoise with white hearts) and is in the sanpro section.
Yes, get some small ones
I found tampax the best
The leaflet is also quite useful
Makes sure she understands that she needs to try to insert them whilst actually on her period
Also, if it hurts it may not be in far enough
Remind her of the importance of changing them regularly too
I was really heavy with my periods, she may need a pad as well
As lljk says dd was very keen right from the outset and had no problems at all. I do wonder though whether horse riding helped her. Some find the applicator ones easier. To help I explained the probable shape of her anatomy and the angle to try and left her to it.
Small ones at first, and she'll just have to try to insert & see if they'll stay.
worn with thin panty liners at first is a good idea.
Personally, I found it impossible to use tampons until I'd lost my virginity, despite a lot of trying! Don't know how you make it easier, she'll just have to try them and see. Obviously others must manage, sorry no help at all!
Join the discussion
Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.Register now
Already registered with Mumsnet? Log in to leave your comment or alternatively, sign in with Facebook or Google.
Please login first.