Preschool key workers with piercings and tattoos, I am not happy

(67 Posts)
tweety2000 Mon 08-Jul-13 22:27:30

My 3 y old will be starting preschool in September. We had a tester day today, but I was a bit unhappy to see few key workers with facial piercings, tongue piercing, and tattooed across the whole length of one of her leg (she was wearing short shorts). Am I just too old and not able to follow the modern times and accept that's its fine, or I am right to be concerned about this? To me it speaks a lot about the standards of the stuff that is beign employed.
I am not against them having those things but I am not keen of them showcasing it to preschoolers.

Would I sound unreasonable if I pointed this to a manager of preschool, or it would be unreasonable of me?

ReallyTired Mon 08-Jul-13 22:28:30


Get over yourself. For christ's sake.

sooperdooper Mon 08-Jul-13 22:29:58

It doesn't have any impact on the standard of their work, it would be unreasonable to say anything and discrimination to suggest they're unsuitable for their roles because of their appearance

Rindercella Mon 08-Jul-13 22:31:10

What snooper said.

csmm Mon 08-Jul-13 22:31:15

So you want your DC to only be taught by one kind of person - one whose sartorial choices you approve of? I've met plenty of thoroughly unpleasant people who wear a suit every day. I don't think you can judge their professional skills by appearance TBH.

VivaLeBeaver Mon 08-Jul-13 22:31:25

YABU. And I think the manager would be hmm if you mentioned it. What do you expect them to do - sack the staff?

As long as they're good at their job then that's what matters. Do you think your 3yo might come home asking for a tattoo?

Rindercella Mon 08-Jul-13 22:31:51

Sooper even hmm

LittleNoona Mon 08-Jul-13 22:32:06


Hopefully, your dc will grow up not to be as judgemental as their mother

ItsNotATest Mon 08-Jul-13 22:32:43

Ha ha ha ha ha ha

This is a wind up I presume?

BoysBoysBoysAndMe Mon 08-Jul-13 22:32:47

Yabu and incredibly judgey and narrow minded.

What if your dc had piercings or tattoos and someone looked down on your dc, as you are doing now?

They will have the same training etc as a member of staff with no piercings..

maja00 Mon 08-Jul-13 22:33:27

Lots of people have tattoos and piercings. Lots of parents do.

Not sure what effect you think it will have on your kid?

Beamur Mon 08-Jul-13 22:34:08

How does someone having tattoos/piercings make them unfit?
I'm pretty sure at least half the staff at my DD's nursery had various ear/nose/belly piercings (at the least) and they were a lovely bunch.

Ginger4justice Mon 08-Jul-13 22:34:19

Yup be afraid, I hear piercings are catching....

AuntieStella Mon 08-Jul-13 22:34:33

Well, I do draw a line at some levels of tattoo in a nursery setting - anything facial/most of neck and hands are no-noes, plus anything featuring nudes, obscenities or scary images such as skulls with snakes coming otu of eye sockets need to be covered at work.

Not so bothered about piercings (unless seriously scary amounts). Other than H&S of children's flailing limbs catching and ripping.

Cyclebump Mon 08-Jul-13 22:36:19

Hahahahahaha! Sorry, clearly you're joking?

Nursery and childcare staff are, in the main, paid incredibly low wages. If you are lucky to find a setting where the staff are passionate and good at their jobs who cares about tattoos and piercings.

PoppyWearer Mon 08-Jul-13 22:36:21

Oh boy.

My DD had a tattooed care worker and loved her/them. She used to try to draw the tattoos.

Next thing they'll be letting people with tattoos and piercings have children. (Clutches pearls) wink

omaoma Mon 08-Jul-13 22:37:32

interesting. DD's preschool has a teaching asst who wears one of those elasticated bandages over their arms to cover a tat. so obviously some schools want them covered. tbh i was a bit hmm that he was bothering to cover it, but DH thought it was a good thing. maybe it was just really lewd smile

SuperiorCat Mon 08-Jul-13 22:38:37

I wouldn't chose to have tattoos / piercings myself as I am a wuss, but I fail to see the link between people who have them and their ability to do a job?

Sounds like it will be good for your DC's to be exposed to a wider range of views.

HalfSpamHalfBrisket Mon 08-Jul-13 22:39:14

This sounds like a reverse AIBU even though its not in AIBU.

LackaDAISYcal Mon 08-Jul-13 22:41:09

Actually our school, which includes the preschool, have a policy of discrete peircings only and tattoos have to be covered. I don't think that, in a professional context, this is unreasonable.

So, I will buck the trend and say YANBU to want to comment on it or be concerned if that's the way you rock, but I would ask for the staff policy on it before kicking off. If it's the policy that anything goes, then YWBU to complain and your only recourse would be to find somewhere else that has a more rigourous policy.

LackaDAISYcal Mon 08-Jul-13 22:43:22

oh, missed the judgey bit in your OP. Having tattoos is bugger all to do with their ability to do the job, or the class of people employed. In that respect YABvvvU

DoctorAnge Mon 08-Jul-13 22:44:28

Oh for goodness sake

morethanpotatoprints Mon 08-Jul-13 22:45:07

Oh well, I am going to go against the grain.

I think it lowers standards, I'm not saying the standard of their work, but appearance.
I worked with dc in a holiday setting soon after leaving school, no way could we have more than ears pierced (once) or any visible tattoos. The rule was cover with uniform or put plaster on.
One girl had a hicky and was suspended until it had gone.
I expect good standards, but agree not a reflection on their ability

BrianTheMole Mon 08-Jul-13 22:46:47

I wouldn't have a huge issue with it as long as they are good at their jobs. And I am old. YABU.

BackforGood Mon 08-Jul-13 22:47:54

I too think there are certain standards of dress for work - 'short shorts' doesn't sound particularly appropriate to me.

ImNotBloody14 Mon 08-Jul-13 22:49:17

hang on. you think you should get a say in what other people look like? really? do you think the people you work with should be entitled to dictate that you should or shouldn't wear make-up or a bracelet or have your hair coloured?

PessimisticMissPiggy Mon 08-Jul-13 22:49:54


My DD's key worker has a multiple visible piercings and she is amazing with my DD. She always looks smart and acts professionally.

It's freedom of expression. Personally I'm not a fan of piercings and tatts but each to their own.

You're just too old and not able to follow the modern times. Although there's a good chance that you're younger than me, so I'll amend that to "you're just not able to follow the modern times".

ImNotBloody14 Mon 08-Jul-13 22:54:10

this isn't AIBU

steppemum Mon 08-Jul-13 22:54:42

I am not a fan of tattoos at all (would never have one, really happy dh agrees with me)
I love the fact that teachers/pre-school workers/nurses etc etc break the stereotype
I used to teach alongside a punk teacher (bright pink spiky hair, black goth clothes etc) It was brilliant for the kids to see that anyone could teach, it created a bridge between 'normal' people and professionals. It was great for challenging the kids ideas of what a punk/goth person should be like.


But the OP asked if she was being unreasonable

Bunbaker Mon 08-Jul-13 22:55:27

I am a boring old dinosaur and don't find tattoos and multiple piercings attractive at all.

Would it bother me? No, not in the slightest

guanosoup Mon 08-Jul-13 22:58:01

In a similar vein, last week, we interviewed health care assistants, to work with the elderly. Near the end of the day, a young woman walked in, with tattoos galore, and a few piercings. I felt the disapproval from my colleague across the room.
That girl did the best interview of the day, by a country mile, and her passion shone through.
My colleague was the first to say she would get the job.

Never judge a book by its cover...

NeoMaxiZoomDweebie Mon 08-Jul-13 23:02:08

I would be pleased my DC was being taught by diverse people. Our nurse (male) when DD banged her head was covered in tattoos and DD loved them....he had clear studs in his pierced bits too. He said a lot of DC are fascinated by the tats and they're good for distraction! DD picked out her faves while he checked her temp etc.

halestone Mon 08-Jul-13 23:13:41

"To me it speaks alot about the standard of stuff being employed"

Stuff i think you mean people!!!!

Tattoo's and piercings don't affect peoples abilities to do a job. However if this is what you believe and you want your children to be brought up judging people by their appearance then simply don't send them to that nursery.

paintyourbox Mon 08-Jul-13 23:19:51

In my line of work we have to sign a policy to say that we will cover all tattoos and take out facial piercings.

I don't mind as I understand that I work in a professional environment and some clients do not think piercings/tattoos are acceptable.

Seriously, worry more about the standards of care rather than appearances. Would you object to someone with a facial disfigurement? Or a large birthmark? Of course you wouldn't, same goes for piercings and tattoos.

MiaowTheCat Wed 10-Jul-13 14:03:11

I've had a pierced nose off and on through my life. I didn't become a worse teacher when I had it (I took the stud out for work, but because I lived in-catchment, it was no great secret I had it in - kids came across me on weekends with it in fairly regularly and after the mandatory "if you blow your nose miss does snot come out that hole the earring's in" conversation - never mentioned again). Didn't become a better teacher when I lost all of my nose studs (hazard of taking them out for work!) and the hole closed up again either.

I tended to take the line of toning down appearance so as not to terrify the parents - but that was mainly for my own ease of life - couldn't be bothered with the preconceptions and judgement and frivolous complaint potential.

Had a parental complaint once as someone had seen me driving my car (windows up btw) and thought the stereo was on too loud.

TheMoonOnAStick Wed 10-Jul-13 14:08:34

I don't like them much either. I wouldn't say anything because you can't, but I do think to myself that they look unprofessional in some work arenas, no matter how lovely or competant the person.


PeterParkerSays Wed 10-Jul-13 14:17:44

OP, if the key work has loops / rings as part of her piercing jewellery, like this I'd have concerns about it in terms of children pulling it and it being unsafe.

If this isn't the case, I'd have more concern about the short shorts, as I wouldn't see them as professional / work wear - the staff at DS's nursery wear a uniform which includes full length trousers.

PeterParkerSays Wed 10-Jul-13 14:18:35

halestone, I think she meant staff but mis-typed......

TobyLerone Wed 10-Jul-13 14:21:26

Seriously? What are you afraid of?

I have several tattoos and several piercings, including one in my tongue. I've managed to raise 2 children to teenage years (so far) with another one on the way. I am also in sole charge of my 20 month-old nephew today. I probably shouldn't be because of the piercings and tattoos, but his mum had to work. She also has piercings (inc tongue) and several tattoos, so I have no idea how she manages.

You are absolutely being unreasonable.

NoComet Wed 10-Jul-13 14:24:12

Facial piercings turn my stomach.

Multiple ears piercings and tiny nose studs ok.

But tongue and eyebrow, ear stretchers and other random holes Just no!!!

Tattoos are fine if they aren't skulls or the grim reaper.

flowery Wed 10-Jul-13 14:36:41

I'm sure if your 3 year old asked for a tattoo or piercing as a result of it being "showcased" to him/her I am sure you will manage to refuse such a request.

Other than that, what exactly is the nature of your concerns? What do you think will happen to your 3yo as a result of seeing a piercing? How do you plan to avoid this in everyday life?

What would you like the preschool manager to do?

PavlovtheCat Wed 10-Jul-13 14:38:03


You are being rediculous if this isn't a wind up.

insancerre Sat 13-Jul-13 14:03:38

In most nurseries most of the childen have tattoos, albeit temporary
and many of them have piercings, i.e earrings
Get over yourself op.

Whogivesashit Sat 13-Jul-13 14:18:46

I work with children and have four tattoos. Does that
make me below standard? YABU Get that stick out your arse!

WalkingRaces Sat 13-Jul-13 14:34:31

OP I completely sympathise with your plight.

I went to a tester day for my precious babby recently. One of the key workers was wearing a twin set and pearls, one had teeth like a horse and a fricking Alice band - who wears an Alice band at 55 ffs?

Anyway, I'm very worried my pfb is going to be coming home demanding pony riding lessons and crudites. What if hand me downs and Primark are no longer any good, and I have to clothe the poor child in Boden and JojoMammamBebeWaaWaaOKYahYah? What if my children grow up to be hoorays? How will I afford Eton and Benenden, and to kit them out for the polo team? Oh dear Christ, what if they want to wear cravats and change their names to Piers, and Cressida?

I'm fucking horrified, frankly.

DumSpiroSpero Sat 13-Jul-13 17:06:53

Providing there's nothing rude on the tatts YABU. Having body art/piercings is no reflection on a person's ability to do their job.

That said I'd be a bit hmm about facial piercings from the POV that young children tend to like hanging off earrings so it may be a health and safety concern - don't see a problem if it's just a nose stud you're talking about.

KarenIsabella Sun 14-Jul-13 20:28:07

If the key worker is good it should not be a problem as long as the piercings/tattoos do not interfere with the teaching.

nkf Sun 14-Jul-13 20:32:08

I think there are probably many nurseries where nobody has a tattoo or facial piercings, but you will have to pay more for them.

yougogirl Mon 15-Jul-13 01:12:01

I realise that this answer may be unpopular with some but I am a nursery manager and our policy states that staff need to have discrete piercings and tattoos, preferably covered. We also have a dress code which would not allow very short shorts! I am generally broad minded and open but it is important to me that staff act and dress professionally. Tattoos and piercings are not for me but I accept that other people think differently. However, I don't want the little people we look after to draw all over their bodies or stick things into their skin or put things in their mouths and noses! Incidentally, I have a great staff team who are well respected and very happy to comply with our policies - I have never once had an objection from any staff member. We all have different standards and opinions but this works for us.

notanyanymore Mon 15-Jul-13 01:18:00

He he! My dd (3yrs) only knows one person with tattoo's (and we see them infrequently and even then rarely with the tattoo's on show) she's obsessed by tattoo's! Can't get enough of strangers with them and will draw all over herself at any given opportunity. I get why a nursery manager would have a dress code for staff, but op, you are being ridiculous. (Sorry)

Kyrptonite Mon 15-Jul-13 01:20:10

Oh fuck. I have 2 tattoos. One of which is 6 visible butterflies. All this time I've been a nursery practitioner I've used it as a counting tool or colours etc. I obviously should quit before I corrupt the children.

Xihha Mon 15-Jul-13 13:13:15

Unless the tattoos are of naked ladies or swear words I really don't see what the problem is, DDs favourite lady at nursery has tattoos on both arms and one on her shoulder, a nose piercing and a tongue piercing and bright coloured hair that seems to change colour every term. She's absolutely brilliant at her job and loved by all the children.

Kryptonite Careful using your tattoos as a teaching tool, my friend has stars twisting round her arm and last time she looked after DD they had been playing count the stars but DD got bored of that game and it took my friend ages to wash the felt-tip off where DD had decided to colour them in instead. grin

BeCool Mon 15-Jul-13 13:23:30

I think perhaps the manager of the preschool has already noticed! hmm
Of course YABVU!

TondelayoSchwarzkopf Mon 15-Jul-13 13:37:26

Am I just too old and not able to follow the modern times?

How old ARE you? I would think if you have a 3 year old you really can't be of a generation that would be shocked by tattoos.

YABU, DS's nanny had facial piercings and a tattoo and was a granny (so I'm guessing older than you) and was one of the kindest and most qualified childcare workers I've come across and had no problem getting work - even in quite a swish area.

Winston Churchill's mum had a tattoo and she seemed to have raised him right.

RoxyFox211 Mon 15-Jul-13 13:40:15

Yabvu! What's that got to do with how good they are with children? I thought maybe you meant they had/were covered in face and neck tattoos which I guess maybe in certain circumstances I can sort of understand someone being a bit put off by, but the main thing is how competent they are are at looking after your dcs. Tongue piercing is hardly visible anyway! Pretty sure staff at dd's nursery have they odd lip/nose stud.

GobbySadcase Mon 15-Jul-13 13:41:25

Get over yourself.
YABVU and ignorant.

IWipeArses Mon 15-Jul-13 13:45:20

Grow up.

rhetorician Mon 15-Jul-13 13:47:04

YABU and very judgy. One of dds key workers has a tongue piercing which led to some rather interesting discussions. Some of them have tattoos, she has never asked about those. As far as I know body piercings have no relationship to a persons capacity to be caring, nurturing, responsible etc.

Fairylea Mon 15-Jul-13 13:51:06

Goodness me..surely nursery and school should be preparing dc for the real world where they will meet all kinds of people? Surely a good, caring nursery worker with tattoos and piercings is part of that education?! Otherwise the world is just going to continue to be as narrow minded and prejudiced as the op itself.

My dh is literally covered in tattoos and piercings. Head down no free skin! He works in management. Thankfully he's never had any negativity even when he's talked about them at interviews - and his job isn't anything "alternative" either.

Quangle Tue 16-Jul-13 14:56:27

I don't like it either. Facial piercings especially. Everyone is being very cool about this but I don't like it. As for very short shorts, no. School is not a free-for-all or a club, it's a workplace and it wouldn't be acceptable in my workplace.

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