4 year old sent home from preschool today. Is this usual?

[Mrsfrumble]

He'd only been there for 30 minutes - I'd just walked home with his little sister and sat down with a coffee - when the school administrator called and said DS was feeling unwell, had been crying and seemed "emotional and angry".

When I arrived to collect him he was standing outside with the administrator, who said DS's teacher was concerned that he didn't seem himself, then handed over DS's bag and went back inside. DS wouldn't tell me much about what had happened.

He's been fine at home, just playing with his lego and watching cartoons. He seems a bit tired but clearly isn't ill. He is a highly strung child and can be quite volatile, although the school have not had any complaints until now (he started there in December. We were due to have a parent teacher conference last week but it got cancelled due to head weather).

Is it normal to send an unhappy child home so quickly? I don't really expect his teacher to cope with DS at his worst all day when she has 9 other children too, but I'm worried that he'll get the idea that if he doesn't fancy school, all he has to do is play up and he'll get to come home. Should I speak to his teacher about it, and what should I say?

[holeinmyheart]

I think it is very reasonable to ask the Pre School about what exactly happened? Also what is their policy regarding asking Parents to come and fetch their children. If there are only given a short time to settle down, the Pre School could presumably empty the class in 5 mins!

How was he when he came home?

What would the procedure have been if you hadn't been available because of a phone malfunction?
It is the first time it has happened though, so maybe you could suck it up this time. Meanwhile he might eventually tell you what went on.

[holeinmyheart]

Sorry, you said how he was.

[Unidentifieditem]

That sounds like a useless pre school or a teacher who can't be arsed with the harder part of their job - lazy lazy

[Mrsfrumble]

Thanks.

I should have mentioned that I knew DS was in a bad mood. He was tired and sulked and whined all the way to school. I didn't handle it well as I was exhausted myself (2 year old DD had been up half the night) and was snappy and impatient, but we had a cuddle and kiss at drop off. I warned his teacher that he was feeling grumpy.

I think I'm very used to seeing him melt down, but as he's never done it at school before his teacher may have been surprised and assumed it was out of character and he must be ill. The school illness policy states that if a child "seems miserable and out of sorts" they may call the parent to collect.

School is closed next week as it's spring break, but I'll speak to his teacher when he goes back. I'm annoyed that the parent teacher conference was cancelled with no plans to reschedule as it would have been the perfect opportunity to discuss his behaviour at school vs his behaviour at home, and their policies for handling more challenging stuff. Because he joined the school part way through the year we didn't have the opportunity when he started.

[TiggyOfQuirm]

Weird. They didn't try very hard. Sometimes people, big or small, are in a bad mood.

[Jacobadom8]

It’s unprofessional on their part, you should ask the Preschool about what exactly happened.

[Jacobadom8]

I think you should ask the Pre School about what exactly happened? Also ask them about their policies regarding asking Parents to come and fetch their children from the school.