Am i being pfb? dd unhappy at nursery

(9 Posts)
RunningKatie Tue 20-May-14 15:31:48

Dd started her free 15 hours at easter. She goes 3 mornings for 5 hours.

This is for the summer term only. In September she will start mornings at the school nursery with children she already knows from playgroups.

Every morning when she realises it's nursery she sobs, she has nightmares the night before. She cries when we go in, begs me not to leave or to take her home.

I know some settling in takes time, but she has previously gone to a playgroup for 2 hrs once a week with no tears. She is a confident little girl so i feel this is more.

She tells us that she doesn't like it but we can't get to the bottom of why.

On friday when i picked her up, she was sat on a bench on her own, head down & withdrawn body language. 3 members of staff outside but none spoke to her whilst i was scanning the garden to spot her. I've no idea what was wrong.

Dh wants to pull her out, i'm a sahm so it's not a problem, except i was enjoying a bit of precious time with ds.

It's half term next week so we're going to decide & give notice then.

Are we being melodramatic? I don't know who her key worker is, so my other options are things like talking to them, getting dh to come with us for dropoff one day, maybe doing 2 mornings.

RunningKatie Tue 20-May-14 15:33:08

Sorry, bit of an epic post.

HSMMaCM Tue 20-May-14 15:34:22

If she's really unhappy and doesn't want to be there, then take her out.

makeminea6x Tue 20-May-14 15:34:41

Sounds awful, I'd want to pull mine out too. Don't know if that's the right thing. It might just not be a good fit?

HSMMaCM Tue 20-May-14 15:35:04

In September you can start fresh, without her dreading it being like her current setting

helensburgh Tue 20-May-14 15:42:44

Pull re out, no hesitation.

Enjoy this summer term with her.

My youngest had little contact with her kids till school nursery and is v v sociable , my eldest we put into a fee paying nursery in an effort to help her socialises, she is very shy still age 10.

I don't believe it makes any difference.

RunningKatie Tue 20-May-14 17:15:25

Thank you all, you've set my mind at rest. I think pulling her out is the right answer for her and we can start afresh in September with school nursery.

I would do a flowers icon but i'm on my phone and can't remember! thanks maybe?

sillymillyb Tue 20-May-14 17:21:31

I've just pulled ds out of nursery after the same dilemma. The final nail in the coffin for me was when I turned up early to find him stood sobbing in the middle of the room with all the staff ignoring him. I decided it just wasn't worth it and I wanted my happy boy back! So, I guess I am saying what everyone else has - pull her out and start again in sept smile

JennyBlueWren Sun 15-Jun-14 09:09:18

As a nursery teacher what surprised me from the post was that you didn't know who her key worker was. Some children do find it hard to settle and I have had screaming children having tantrums on the floor. Sometimes it was best to not give them lots of attention at these times so we would be "ignoring" them. However someone would always be nearby and this should have been discussed with you. Was she spending 3 hours like this?! In discussion with parents we sometimes have parents just leave them for half an hour so they get used to the idea but aren't distressed for too long we might then have the parents come back and join the child in playing if they are comfortable with that.

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