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How's Bump??? And other inane questions...

(165 Posts)
CornishFirstTimer22 Thu 25-Jul-13 13:45:02

OK, so they're maybe not all inane, but I must be asked 'how's bump?' about fifty times a day!!!

How do I reply?? 'Bumpy', 'Fine' or instead provide them with a 20 minute assessment of my current pregnancy status?

Other crackers are - 'Does the bump hurt? and 'What can you eat?'

So come on ladies... what other questions really 'get your goat'???

Disclaimer - This is just for fun, I know most people are just genuinely being curious...

:-)

Lovemyprincess4eva Thu 25-Jul-13 14:30:40

"How are you coping in this heat?"
Do they want the honest answer of I strip off as soon as I get home and look a complete mess from the minute my door closes cos I am sweating like a pig!! Or the nice answer of 'oh its not too bad, I'm managing'

There are hundreds of others but that is the most common recently xx

Chickpea1983 Thu 25-Jul-13 14:47:02

A guy I know always asks me 'how is the pregnancy'. I don't know why, but it makes my skin crawl (maybe more to do with him than the question). I think it is a much more personal question than asking 'how are you doing/feeling'. His wife had a baby recently, so I think he sees himself as some kind of bloody expert now!

Futterby Thu 25-Jul-13 14:47:36

My gran asked me when I was 20 weeks "will these jammies fit you when you're in labour?" I told her that I have no idea how big I'll be, and she said "yeah, but what do you think?" confused

HotSoupDumpling Thu 25-Jul-13 14:49:19

OP, I love your reply of 'bumpy'! I will be using that in future instead of the v boring 'fine, fine, as usual' etc

lovemy - I get asked that all the time. I don't think they want my answer, which consists of a long bullet point list involving tepid showers, ice water food baths, wearing not much, eating ice-lollies, bouncing on a gym ball in front of a fan, lying around.

Not inane but does annoy me:

Q: Are you allowed to eat XYZ?

A: I'm 'allowed' to eat whatever the hell I like. I've decided to avoid some foods because of the risks they pose.

textbook Thu 25-Jul-13 14:57:11

My favourite so far has been from my midwife, who when measuring my fundal height (and scaring me about baby's size) asked, "So... do you have a feeling about whether this baby will be bigger or smaller than your first child?"

Uh, no. And even if I did, a "feeling" isn't exactly scientific. If you're concerned about me having another small baby, how about a scan?!?

mrsspagbol Thu 25-Jul-13 14:59:06

"If you're concerned about me having another small baby, how about a scan?!?"

Lol! grin

MrsDeVere Thu 25-Jul-13 14:59:20

I am very annoying.
I often ask random pregnant women how they are feeling, how they are coping in the heat, if they are ok etc.

I have had 5dcs

I just thought I was being nice.

Futterby Thu 25-Jul-13 15:04:37

Touchy hmm

It gets incredibly irritating when every single person you've met that day asks you the same inane question and saying the same reply over and over and over again.

MrsDeVere Thu 25-Jul-13 15:13:31

I have been pregnant a fair bit. I am not quite senile yet.
You are not the only person ever to have had a baby hmm

Touchy yourself.

HotSoupDumpling Thu 25-Jul-13 15:18:10

Oi oi MrsDV, the OP has specifically said 'this is just for fun'...

Christelle2207 Thu 25-Jul-13 15:45:23

Really grates me too the "how's the bump" question. I now just smile and say "growing".

Teaandflapjacks Thu 25-Jul-13 15:49:40

I don't know - it's quite nice to be asked if you want to moan for two mins though isn't it - I mean - they did ask! So you can just off load e.g. - 'fricking uncomfortable, feet look like Hobitt feet, could irrigate a vineyard just by walking past it, can't sleep, keep wanting to hit people in the face with a wet fish' and so on - have a bit of fun with it! I do, cheers me right up. grin

FrussoHathor Thu 25-Jul-13 16:00:07

I always followed the "how's the bump" question with looking down and saying "well it's still there" in a monotone voice.

Also occasionally fun to look down in shock and exclaim "where the f..k did that come from?" Or looking at the questioner with a blank face and asking the "what bump?" Or "Are you saying I'm fat?"

thecakeisalie Thu 25-Jul-13 16:01:34

I've gotten so used to being asked the same inane questions looking after my 3 nearly 4yr old ds1 all day long!

The general questions people ask never really bothered me with either pregnancy I know its just people trying to be a friendly and show an interest. Doubt it'll bother me this time either, only 5 weeks so a way to go before they start though!

Lydia161290 Thu 25-Jul-13 16:05:16

'When are you due?'
'How are you coping?'
'Do you need any help with your one shopping bag?'
'How do you fit into ordinary clothes still?'
'Are you married?'
'Wow, you look so young to be pregnant. How old are you?' (i'm 22)
'Do you know who the father is?'
'Does he work?'
'Do you live together?'
'Have you got everything you need for the baby?'

The worst, and it's not even a question, it's just a saying that REALLY irritates me :: 'NOT LONG TO GO NOW!'

I'm 40 weeks. I think I know.

CornishFirstTimer22 Thu 25-Jul-13 16:07:28

I know most people are just trying be nice, and funnily the same questions bother me a lot less coming from some people rather than others!!

I think it's the people you know who just ask because they literally can't think of anything else to say that grate!! My mum/ OH/ family etc are genuinely asking!

I am reserving the right to be as tetchy/ unreasonable in this heat/ with these hormones as I please... ;-)

SuffolkNWhat Thu 25-Jul-13 19:03:33

The heat one I just fix them with a state a mutter "badly". They soon leave you alone!

Andanotherthing123 Thu 25-Jul-13 19:12:59

"I bet you're hoping for a girl this time.". Really winds me up as it's such a bloody irritating thing to assume. Also, the people who say "I bet you wanted a third so you can try for a girl". No, don't care what the gender is, I've loved having boys but a girl would be equally nice.

Thank you for letting me rant.

Bunnylion Thu 25-Jul-13 19:43:57

I don't mind the questions so much, but I am getting bored of hearing non-pregnant people moaning about how they can't sleep in this weather.

I usually just give them a sympathetic look and resist opening the pregnancy winge-floodgates, but I've not got more than a solid hour myself in the past week; what with the spd, heart burn, giant kicking belly, inability to move, cramp, itching, oh and this weather. (floodgate has been firmly closed again).

Bunnylion Thu 25-Jul-13 19:45:24

Oh and the weeing every hour at night. Mustn't forget the weeing. smile

BungleGeorgeAndZippy Thu 25-Jul-13 19:45:38

"Are you sure there so ly one in there?" YES! I'm flipping 8.5 months pregnant, when a I allowed to looks pregnant!

"God you're huuuuuuge!"

"How long do you have left (at work)" - one day less than when you asked me yesterday.

MsCatShoes Thu 25-Jul-13 19:58:02

I've been asked: "Are you still moving around okay?" ... I'm only 20wks ...

Hubb Thu 25-Jul-13 20:09:30

I'm really really fed up with the inane conversation, "have you got any cravings" is a hot one for me at the moment...

TickTockTimesUp Thu 25-Jul-13 20:18:08

'how's the bump?'
'bet you're hating this heat'
and my all time favorite 'd you know what you're having?' I usually just answer with hopefully it will be a baby, but it could also be an alien. angry

ComtesseDeFrouFrou Thu 25-Jul-13 20:26:14

Chickpea someone at work today asked me "How's you're pregnancy going?". I agree, it just feels like a really weird, clinical question. Bleugh.

Mind you, he's the same socially awkward so and so who asked me if I'd had any pregnancy fetishes hmm I think he meant cravings, but I had to bite my tongue really hard.

Depending on who's asking, my answer to the question how am I doing is either "tired and hot" or "tired and grumpy" grin

Evi1984 Thu 25-Jul-13 20:33:17

My DH's 95 yr old Granny keeps asking what my cravings are, beginning to grate a little now but I'll let her off due to age!
So glad I'm not the only one getting sick of being asked how bump is. I am going to use the answer 'bumpy' from now on though, that's brill!

The other annoying thing I'm finding at the moment is people asking 'so are you going to find out the sex?' when I answer with 'yes!' I get a very shocked 'are you really?'
Why the hell did you ask me if you can't handle my answer!!

2Labradors Thu 25-Jul-13 21:34:41

I got asked 'where's the baby?'

I pointed at my stomach and said 'erm, in there!'

She'd got me confused with another mum who'd had her baby the previous day grin

Luckily I've only been asked that question once so far haha

Raindrops0nRoses Thu 25-Jul-13 21:46:06

"So have you got everything you need?" Yes thanks, everything. I don't plan on shopping ever again.

LilPeasMama Thu 25-Jul-13 23:17:16

Not so much asked but told by an older gentleman...

"Make sure you get the tablet after this one" shock

This is my first pg at 32yrs old..... confused

RobotBananas Thu 25-Jul-13 23:22:43

You grumpy lot. I've been asked how's bump, or how I'm coping in the heat. Never occurred to me to be offended or bored by the questions.
Nice to be asked to be honest.plenty of so called friends are basically ignoring the fact that I'm pg, so its nice that people are asking how I am.

On the other hand... Comments on my size are not welcome thanks (with you all on that) and will be met with a snarky remark.

RNJ3007 Thu 25-Jul-13 23:22:50

TickTock I resorted to a pout and 'Not a puppy' in response to 'what are you having?'

Current favourite (not) is 'Surely you've stopped being sick now?!' No, I have HG... I am still a human vomit machine. Go away.

princesscupcakemummyb Thu 25-Jul-13 23:23:59

things like

oh your bump is small
hows bump
those horemones are awful arent they?
how are you coping with the heat?
whats your craving?
oh your 3rd thats alot you will be busy
did you want a boy or a girl this time (having a boy after 2 girls)
hope your eating enough
you shouldnt do that your pregnant!

lots as you can see lol smile

Vagazzled Thu 25-Jul-13 23:29:22

Favourite answer with dd(4)

"what are you having?"
"Hopefully a baby, but dp keeps banging on about a dog" grin

sweetiepie1979 Thu 25-Jul-13 23:35:31

I hate the question/statement

I suppose you'd like a boy this time!?

So rude, I don't mind if it's a boy or a girl Im not going to say yes I already have a girl now I want a boy! That would be a shut thing to say and your a shit for thinking it. Bugger off!

Thanks for letting me vent that OP x

cookiemonster100 Thu 25-Jul-13 23:38:40

Best question so far was by a colleague that I don't speak to on a daily basis but thought it ok to ask me in a open planned office quite loudly " have you hit the constipation stage yet?". shock

I don't mind people asking the inane questions I know (most) people mean well. What I REALLY CAN'T STAND is people advising instructing you on what you should and shouldn't be doing. "Should you be eating that?", " you don't want to waste your money on xyz" blah blah blah

marushka82 Fri 26-Jul-13 00:30:20

I don't mind the cravings/coping with heat etc questions. What I hated was when I was still at work (on maternity leave for the last 3 weeks) and one co-worker I barely knew said 'Getting bigger every day' every.single.time.she.saw.me.
My answer was always 'yes thanks, it's because I'm growing a human being in there!' grr.

DaveMccave Fri 26-Jul-13 00:56:17

I don't mind general interest but I seem to get the exact same questions from everyone, since the pg was announced, repeatedly from friends and family and strangers. and they drive me insane:

'Are you excited?'
'Is dp excited?'
'Is dd excited?'
'Have you got everything ready?'

What do they want me to say? That I'm dreading it? Do they want me to squee?! I get asked so many times that I can't even fake the enthusiasm. I am excited, the question just bores me to death making me sound unconvincing which is awkward.

HotSoupDumpling Fri 26-Jul-13 07:09:22

'Do they want me to squee' - this is so true! I AM very excited...inside. But I'm not the high pitched 'eeeeeee' 'my life is amazing!!' 'let me breathlessly talk about my amazing pregnancy' type, and don't want to tempt fate, and am aware that things may go wrong, so always come across as a little flat.

Also, one very darling friend of mine always asks me (in front of all our other male and female friends) whether my boobs have grown since she last saw me hmm

purplemurple1 Fri 26-Jul-13 07:17:11

Oh I'm feeling left out, I hardly ever get asked about it, occasionaly get asked how my stomach is/ how the alien is, to which my reply is always - OK but baby and breakfast are having a fight if I run to the toilet you know who won!

Any other time I mention it (i.e. if I can't physically do something), I tend to get a blank look and then - oh yeah forgot you were preg. (34wks so its not like I'm not showing)

Oh how I long for the inanne questions, I guess there is no pleasing us preggos grin

ChunkyPickle Fri 26-Jul-13 07:36:23

And there was me feeling awful because when the same other mother at the childminder asks how I'm doing I've realised I've only given weather related answers for the past two months.

The trouble is I seem to have lost all small-talk skills since getting so hot and uncomfortable, so say the first thing that comes into my head. Being English, that's the weather blush

AlisonL1981 Fri 26-Jul-13 07:39:58

I've forgotten what wound me up in pregnancy, I think it was just the same questions over and over and over again. 'Is it kicking?' and 'what are you craving?' I once stuck a notice on the bulletin board "I'm fine, babys fine, no morning sickness, no kicks today, and no new cravings!'

What bugs me now is the question everyone seems to ask...
'Is he a good baby?'

No, at 3 months he's setting fire to stuff, joyriding and swears too much'!

Dp wants me to say the above, I just go with 'yes'!

TobyLerone Fri 26-Jul-13 07:55:00

My mother keeps making little comments about me having a "belly".

I lost it a bit the other day and said "Stop! How would you like it if I said 'your boobs are massive!'?"

I really hate this about pregnancy. I know people are just trying to be nice, but I loathe the constant questions and obvious looks at my abdomen. And if my sister tries to fucking GRAB my bump one more time, while laughing about how I won't let her touch it so she'll just do it anway, I will not be responsible for my actions.

Aaaaaand breathe...

Queazy Fri 26-Jul-13 08:13:50

I'm 36 weeks and people are now asking me, 'Are you nervous/scared/dreading the birth?' Really charming question, especially from people you barely know xx

Excited85 Fri 26-Jul-13 08:22:36

Queasy - that's the one thing that annoys me too. I actually quite like the questions and don't mind people touching my bump, it's such a joyous event that I find it all the more lovely others are interested, but I DO NOT want to hear your birth stories thank you very much!!!! I'm trying for a Hypnobirth and currently very much excited about and looking forward to the big day, please don't undo all the hard work I've put in and try scare me with your thoughtless comments about how 'oh so horrible' your birth was!!! And breathe....!!!!

Laquila Fri 26-Jul-13 08:31:08

Ahhhhh SO TRUE.

At work, I get a lot of "Soooo, not long to go now?!" (said with a sort of wink and a nod at my bump, as if I might have misunderstood).

I've also had "You've still got 7 weeks to go?! But you're huuuuuge!" and the bafflingly inane "Ooh, you look like you're geting bigger every day!". i am honestly confused as to what to say to this one.

LotsaTuddles Fri 26-Jul-13 08:31:25

It's the non pregnant people that are unable to sleep in this heat that grate on me.

There's one guy at my work, who everyday moans about how unbearable the heat is and that it's soooo hard to sleep. Try being just as hot, having to wee at least every hour and having a baby kick you from the inside every time you get comfortable before you moan at me about being too hot!!!

He even moaned that much last week, that his line manager sent him home, when he came in the next day, our CEO had bought him a bloody desk fan!!!!

Sorry, can you tell it gets to me a bit

WentOnABearHunt Fri 26-Jul-13 09:12:21

I genuinely don't mind people asking me questions about my pregnancy, But I do hate the question 'was it planned'... there are so many judgements either way with that, and its plain rude!! They might as well be asking 'did you stupidly plan a pregnancy or are you just shit with contraception!' lol. I am constantly being asked if it is my first, to which the answer is no, my third. 'THIRD??!!? You dont look old enough!!!' (I am nearly 30).

Not pregnancy related, but I hate being constantly asked who has my children when I am at work. Errrm the same as other bloody people who have kids and work, eg school, childminder, grandparents! I don't see why people are so bloody well concerned what my childcare arrangements are!! GRRRR... I bet there is not a man in history who has been asked this question.

CornishFirstTimer22 Fri 26-Jul-13 12:00:34

That reminds me... I also get... 'wow, your boobs are going to be HUGE by the end aren't they'? Just because they were a fair size to start with!

How am I meant to know how big they'll be? Why do you care about my chest measurements anyway??

maybe I should comment on their boobs/ man bits!

Also the other day I had a friend who I hadn't seen for a while, come straight up to me and LIFT MY DRESS UP to get a look at the bump!! Way worse than the sneaky grab!!

All of the above - I'm trying really hard not to get annoyed as I know people are just being nice and showing an interest, but yes answering the same question a dozen times a day is annoying.

Whats really getting on my goat at the moment though is people asking how long I have left, then looking disbelieving when I say 9 weeks - 'oh, you look ready to pop!'. No I don't, I look pretty average for a 7 month pregnant woman - you do understand there is a human being in my stomach right?

Oh, and woman in the office commenting 'its surprising more women don't die during childbirth really isn't it?'. Brilliant, cheers for that hmm

My mum yesterday was very put out that I would not meet her in town soon to pick up things she has bought for the baby.

It's the middle of the summer holidays, I have a one year old ds who has decided sleeping all night definitely isn't in his plans the past 2 weeks, theres a fecking 8 year high in temperatures, I'm due dd2 in 2 weeks and live in the hospital - iron drips, blood tests, growth scans, diabetes test s, anaesthetist appointments all on top of 'normal' midwife appointments and my mother has the cheek to humph at my not going into fucking town confused

^^ this is just one example of the amount of times I get ''it can't be that bad'' from my mother angry

Other people are actually alright compared to my mum, mainly how long have you got left, you'll be glad then, are you all prepared etc nice generic questions.

20wkbaby Fri 26-Jul-13 12:45:47

Not a question but when I was pregnant with DD1 my BIL was eating a tart with some goat's cheese on and kindly pointed out to me, 'You can't eat this'. I was irritated but replied, 'Mainly because it's yours!'.

Now I still don't know whether as I was newly pregnant he thought I was woefully uninformed about the food advice, whether he was trying to rub it in that I couldn't eat something delicious or whether he suddenly remembered that was the advice. Obv I know now it is OK if cooked, I often wish I could go back in time to wipe the smug expression off his face.

My sister went through her entire pregnancy feeling she was missing out on so much lovely food and no wonder with support like that at home.

parttimer79 Fri 26-Jul-13 13:06:21

I find it odd that people I don't know ask me what it is, and when I say I don't know (I do know really) they say ooh that's best isn't it. And I think whatever answer I gave you, you inane moron you would have validated it...
Can you tell I'm 38 weeks and too hot??

AidanTheRevengeNinja Fri 26-Jul-13 13:28:45

Ah this thread makes me nostalgic grin

I didn't mind the inane questions, but was quite taken aback when someone at work told me (when I was 35 weeks) that she knew lots of pregnant women at the moment, and it was probably because of the recession and people having nothing else to do shock I was too being being insulted on multiple levels to think of a good response.

blondebaby111 Fri 26-Jul-13 13:46:49

Maybe I'm a bit odd but I love being asked how my bump or pregnancy is doing. I think its nice that people take an interest and I find its the only time I talk about it, is when I'm asked as I don't want to go on and on about being pregnant.
I never ever thought ikd be lucky enough to be in this position so when I'm asked I love to talk about it xx

parttimer79 Fri 26-Jul-13 13:58:33

blonde I find it very sweet when people ask how I am or how bump is but find probing questions about my family planning or finding out the sex a bit odd.

I also keep seeing people on here say ooh you just have to smile and nod - I didn't realise that one of the deals of motherhood was that I had to suffer fools gladly!

MrsO27 Fri 26-Jul-13 14:17:31

"Do you know what you're having?" is the one I'm asked the most. I probably find this the most frustrating because we don't and I normally have to then explain our reasons for not finding out, which you get tired of doing. I guess people are just trying to be kind though and show an interest. I think I've been guilty of asking some of these questions myself...apart from the "was it planned?" question. That's just rude!

bellamysbride Fri 26-Jul-13 14:24:31

I loved being asked about my pregnancies. It would be odd to simply ignore the fact that you are pregnant wouldn't it? We live in an area of London with a REALLY high birth rate so women's pregnancies are just not that interesting and you never get asked. I used to love going to stay with my parent's when I was pregnant and people actually acknowledged you were pregnant.

IsleOfIslay Fri 26-Jul-13 14:31:38

Towards the end the thing that annoyed me the most was "oh she'll come when she is ready"
Yes I know that but I'm uncomfy, need to per every 5 mins, I now walk with a waddle and I'm now so big even my maternity clothes don't really fit!
Get out baby! grin

RunningBear78 Fri 26-Jul-13 15:06:02

I agree, I think the level of annoyance at the usual questions depends on who the person is. Some people look genuinely excited and interested to know how you are and whether I am ok in the heat, and some seem to ask just to gloat about my likely levels of discomfort (more glee from me to say, actually, I'm quite enjoying being warm for a change and given me the perfect excuse to a buy a beautiful fan).

Again, some people are quite excited by a reply of ooh only 7 weeks to go, although the mad lady in the health food shop thought that was the appropriate time to say 'but you are so big' - answer, no I'm actually about right, if not small, followed swiftly by 'are you having twins?' wtf!

weebarra Fri 26-Jul-13 15:19:40

I'm not annoyed by many of the questions, friends and colleagues are just showing an interest.
Although, I was at a football match last night (got through the turnstiles, yay) and a random woman asked when I was due, then asked if I was sure it wasn't twins as I was huge. Cheers, like.
Though it was a very exciting game and I think my poor dad was worried the stress would start labour - and he's a doctor!

Sparkeleigh Fri 26-Jul-13 15:39:17

"Can you feel the baby move now?"
"Yes, it's kicking a lot"
"Can you ever see a hand poking out of your skin?"
"Uhh, no..." confusedhmm

beccala Fri 26-Jul-13 15:42:21

"Is the heat getting to you?" That one is getting g on my nerves must be asked it several times a day - really bored with giving same answer ( no I'm lucky no worse than anyone else)

One I hate most tho is "have you thought of any names?". Would prefer not to tell anyone really in case they tell me they hate it or know someone called that who is horrible etc. I managed to last the 1st 6 months or so saying no we haven't decided yet or by saying amusing names that would be very wrong with our surname (my favourite pasttime if I'm honest) but now have run out of new ways to answer it so just bloody tell them and dare them to say they don't like it.

Great thread - thought was just me who was miserable old bag and hated all the questions :-)

grimbletart Fri 26-Jul-13 16:06:35

My best one at 40 weeks was "haven't you had it yet?" What do you think this is FFS - a bloody great beach ball I've stuck up my dress for fun?

Second time around to head this sort of question off at the pass was to give everyone except my immediate family a date a month later than it was due. That rebounded as the questions then became "is it OK, must be worrying having a premature baby..?"

Can't win. grin

ScrambledSmegs Fri 26-Jul-13 16:33:32

With DD1 we did quite a bit of last minute online shopping (cos we bought the pram but forgot nappies, muslins, clothes etc) . No matter what site we bought from we seemed to get the same courier. And he kept asking me the same question -

Courier: Is it twins in there?
Me: No, just the one.
Courier: Are you sure? <smug chuckle>
Me: angry hmm angry

Every. Fucking. Time.

DD1 wasn't even that big. Newsflash, gitwad - that's what full term looks like.

blondebaby111 Fri 26-Jul-13 16:46:31

Although I do love being asked about my pregnancy the one thing that does annoy me is the comment 'ahh yours is a very much wanted baby then' how ridiculous, most babies are wanted whether planned or not and its not like you can take them back For a refund afterwards!!! [Shock]

Mayanbob Fri 26-Jul-13 16:48:46

scrambledSmegs I think I may have killed him.

For the most part I can deal with inane questions, but one thing I have recently discovered I CANNOT STAND is the advice offered to me by dear male friends who have recently had children. To the extent that I actually avoid them now. Their DPs are fine and lovely. It's just them.

"You won't need that thing that you are buying because the baby will be in with you for 6 months anyway" - yes it will, but if I want to buy a new rug for the lounge I will!.

"you'll find your nipples will leak quite a bit when other babies cry" Thanks for that.

"When it cries, it's just a matter of trying to work out what it needs, it will usually be food, or a nappy change or maybe just a cuddle"
no shit sherlock.

And the favourite was a description of the guy's poor wife's epsitioptomy (sp?) and the stitches.

angry

RunningBear78 Fri 26-Jul-13 17:14:53

Just had an electrician round to quote for some more work. He asked 'Weren't you expecting last time I came around' Yes ... that would be about 3 months ago. It does tend to take longer than that to grow a baby!!!

Oh, and the lady in the bra shop the other day when I asked about maternity bra's (at 28 weeks) 'Have you had the baby yet?' eh confused

I have not long got home from shopping. I was politely asked how long I have left, politely replied 2 weeks ooh I can't wait, the nosy wifey at the other side went shock 2 weeks?? which I politely gritted my teeth and smiled at. Nice woman asks if I know what I'm having and I say a wee girl . . Cue nosy wifey blurting ''wee? I'd hardly call that a wee girl!'' To my embarrassment I welled up - I didn't cry but my eyes were soaked sad I was so upset!!

TickTockTimesUp Fri 26-Jul-13 17:33:37

I went to the shop to buy some sweets and a woman next to me just brazenly asked if my partner still found me attractive shock I didn't know this woman at all and then the shop assistant asked if I should be eating chocolate. angry

SugarMiceInTheRain Fri 26-Jul-13 17:44:29

I generally didn't mind the questions, funniest one was when I was having lunch with a couple of male colleagues, with whom I got on well, Colleague A said 'Can I touch your bump?' I said I didn't mind and Colleague B looked horrified and said 'A! You can't ask that!!!' He hadn't heard the 'p' at the end of the last word... grin

However now that I'm expecting DC3, it's very hot and despite not yet being 3 months gone I have a bump (which must surely be bloating rather than baby) I expect I am going to get very annoyed very quickly at stupid questions from random strangers...

ChippingInHopHopHop Fri 26-Jul-13 17:45:51

If you put any store in MN being relfective of the general population (which thank god I don't) you wouldn't ever talk to anyone for fear of pissing them off. Honestly, when did people get so ... unfriendly and easily irritated?

Mayanbob Fri 26-Jul-13 17:53:12

chipping I think it was when they were hot, tired and pregnant. grin

MrsHY1 Fri 26-Jul-13 18:06:35

I for one welcome all questions, inane or otherwise, about my pregnancy- nothing irritates me. I'm finally pregnant after my third IVF so maybe that's why. When I get asked a question it's like I've been reminded that it's finally come good for me- and I love it!

I like being asked how I am etc and hows baby

what I don't like are comments like oh your huge

or your small

or statements telling me im this that or the other

FoofFighter Fri 26-Jul-13 18:18:16

It's not so much the actual content of the questions, just the sheer amount, waddling walking down the High St and getting stopped what feels like 20 times in a row and having the same few questions over and over and over and over.....

You know people mean well really but my goodness it grinds my gears. I shall never again ask a question of a pregnant lady without them bringing up the subject first!

FoofFighter Fri 26-Jul-13 18:20:15

I'm finally pregnant too after a bloody long journey but I'm still entitled to moan a bit if I want to.

Anothermrssmith Fri 26-Jul-13 18:42:24

Have to admit I'm not at the obviously pregnant stage yet so don't get many just yet but there's one guy at work who despite having barely said two words to me in the whole time I've worked there makes a point of coming through every morning,putting his hand on my shoulder and asking how I am every single morning. He's trying to be nice I know but he never asked before I was pregnant! Same guy also seems to be keeping a running total of how many times a day I throw up

'How are we today?'
'Ok thanks'
'Six times yesterday'

Oh fuck off

And the other guy who has been trying to convince me ever since I told work I'm pregnant that Optimus prime (as in the transformer) is a great name if its a boy...

thatdaisygirl Fri 26-Jul-13 20:16:23

I don't get that irritated by the questions in this my 2nd pregnancy (or maybe I'm lucky to not know/work with really annoying people!)

But one thing that I used to find really funny in my last pregnancy was generally older women asking me 'Do you know what you're having?'
Me: 'No, but we're going to try and find out if baby will uncross it legs at a later scan'
Lady: 'Really!? Oh I never wanted to know, well you couldn't when I had mine, I think it would ruin the surprise. You young uns have no patience!
Me: Well, we just really want to know.
Lady: Well make sure you tell me when you find out.

!!?!?!!

Mommy2Bee Fri 26-Jul-13 20:44:16

My favourite conversation was:

Italian waiter: Oh you are pregnant, when is baby due?

Me: About 3.5 months

Waiter: Oh....is it twins

Me: (Grinding teeth) no I'm just ffing huge (I actually wasn't that big)

My other favourite is after you've had the baby... "Ooo hasn't he grown?" "Well yes, he's a baby, he does a lot of that"

CalamityJ Fri 26-Jul-13 20:59:49

How's the bump? Me: Still there!
Do you know what you're having? Me: Hopefully a baby
How are you feeling? Me: Fat and tired

All genuine responses to perhaps kindly but boringly repetitive questions.

I never found a good answer to Can I touch your bump? I always said yes when of course I really meant No don't touch me!

My MIL was the worst at it and would cop a feel every week. She only went and did it the other day (DD is 5 months) saying. "Oooh your tummy's nearly gone isn't it?" Nice sentiments but DON'T TOUCH ME!

HugAMoo Fri 26-Jul-13 21:09:57

On telling people I'm expecting: 'is DH happy?'

No he's devastated. Really fucking gutted.

grin

mrsspagbol Fri 26-Jul-13 22:43:45

LOL at Hugamoo

Maggietess Sat 27-Jul-13 00:55:03

Stranger : "is that your first"

Me: " no its my third actually"

Stranger: "ooooh you're keen you've your hands full don't you?! "

Me: "hg.. Mm. Ggg... Rrr. Ha.. Ha."

Stranger: "how old are the other two?"

Me: "5 & 2"

Stranger:" ooooh, you're keen aren't you? "

Ehm, how do I answer that...." yes the hubbie and I are at it like rabbits every night, it's a wonder we don't have a litter".... Or "seriously commenting on my sex life... Let's talk about yours next, complete stranger lady in the lift"

And breathe wink wink wink

Still happens now he's here too...

Thisisfreakingmeout Sat 27-Jul-13 02:05:59

From two female relatives when we first announced - "was it planned?" Luckily yes, (or hopefully I am a good liar) otherwise this conversation is about to get awkward.

Imagine the response "no, major mess up, going to have to grin and bear the next 18 years."

Come on people.

ComtesseDeFrouFrou Sat 27-Jul-13 07:27:25

Interestingly, the one question no-one has asked me is whether it was planned. Mind you, DH and I work in the same office, so it would be kind of an odd question.

Come to think if it, it's a pretty odd question anyway confused

cjel Sat 27-Jul-13 08:46:29

Oh ladies, pregnancy and birth is such a huge thing, people may be awkward but they are trying to be excited for you!!!!smile

weebarra Sat 27-Jul-13 08:54:02

Re "was it planned?". Expecting DC3 whose arrival has been a bit unexpected and have had this one a lot, probably because I was so emphatic about stopping at 2!

I loved being asked.

The only thing which I got a bit sick of was the 'any day now!' Comments which started at 6 months because I was already quite worried about the size.

OxfordToLondoner Sat 27-Jul-13 09:11:46

A text from my Dad (who's supposed to be on standby to rush up to look after DS when I go into labour, but I don't think quite gets it):

"Still on schedule for the 5th?"

(i.e. the due date. had to reply saying that there's only a 5% chance DD will arrive on schedule!)

bigbuttons Sat 27-Jul-13 10:16:52

When first first pg with ds1, my ex proudly announced the news to his curmudgeonly old grandmother. Her response, with out even taking her eyes from the tv, was "who's the father"?

bigbuttons Sat 27-Jul-13 10:22:30

when I announced I was pg with dc 4 I had a horrible question from a woman who had only dc and did not want anymore . It was asked in all seriousness with a look of horror on her face " Are you mad'?
10 years on and I still haven't forgotten.

bigbuttons Sat 27-Jul-13 10:23:52

and another one!!!!
I have 6 dc and after dc no 3 a very common reaction to each subsequent pg was " Haven't you found out what causes it ( the PG) yet?

FoofFighter Sat 27-Jul-13 11:02:06

Oxford - I had to explain due dates to my teenaged son, he thought it was a given it will be arriving on the 13th ;)

riskit4abiskit Sat 27-Jul-13 11:02:51

I dont mind questions, but what I never expected or had heard about was people rubbing the bump 'for luck' as if it was catching! I am not a lucky cat or ancient aztec fertility statue nor never will be!

melika Sat 27-Jul-13 12:48:54

I think it's very nice that people want to know how you are. It's not meant maliciously, you know!

Although, it did get on my nerves when my DSis kept asking 'It's only one in there, isn't it?'

PickleFish Sat 27-Jul-13 13:33:12

wow.

ok, got the message now. Won't be asking any questions or trying to start any conversations with pregnant acquaintances then, not a chance. I'm a bit crap at that anyway, and pretty much anything I would think of would clearly be taken the wrong way, even if I just wanted to wish them well.

I'll wait til they bring anything to do with babies/preganancy/birth up themselves and just give a smile.

Wossname Sat 27-Jul-13 13:42:09

It's generally just making conversation, nobody really cares. Most people or their partners have already been through a pregnancy and aren't actually enthralled.

Inane! How rude.

weebarra Sat 27-Jul-13 14:22:33

Have to say, especially with it being DC3, pregnancy is not my only topic of conversation either! I'm perfectly capable, nay willing, to talk about other stuff.

Pretty sure I had "Still here ?" a few times (perhaps because I was overdue with both)
Answer (in head) "Yes, and hopefully I still will be after she's born" confused
Cravings one also mildly annoying. With me it was not so much cravings as things I could eat without feeling sick ! (Thankfully just months 1-3)
For a while I lived on ready salted pringles and pineapple and coconut juice smile

badguider Sat 27-Jul-13 15:56:07

I haven't had many questions/comments at all. I guess I've been wearing quite loose floaty tops in this heat. When people ask how I am I've been saying "fine" as its true and then usually moving the conversation on to some other topic - I'm not that into talking pregnancy/babies anyway. The only people I've really got chatting to about it are other preg women.

ByTheWishingWell Sat 27-Jul-13 17:49:38

I quite like most of the questions- I'm excited, and happy to talk about it if people are interested.

But I do dislike being asked if it was planned (answer: no), particularly as two different people followed that with asking if I know who the dad is shock

Alconleigh Sat 27-Jul-13 17:51:06

It may come as something of a shock to some of you, but most people asking don't give a monkeys, they are making small talk and it's generally considered rude to ignore someone's pregnancy. Now overly-intrusive questions about your contraception, or grabs for the bump, are clearly wrong, but give people a break. If only because I am fairly certain your own small talk is not reminiscent of an evening with Noel Coward and Dorothy Parker either.

MrsHY1 Sat 27-Jul-13 19:37:55

Haha alconleigh, quite! Well said smile

ipswichwitch Sat 27-Jul-13 19:48:33

I don't mind the questions but I really resent people trying to have a feel of my bump - makes me feel like an over ripe melon at the supermarket. I refuse to be manhandled by complete strangers, unless its a medical necessity (which is fairly unlikely in the veg aisle at asda).

One persistent lady who kept asking to feel my bump got "only if I can feel yours", to which she replied "but I'm not pregnant". I gave her the stony stare and she finally took the hint. I'm not normally rude but I have personal space issues.

Seriously,I don't mind the inane questions...it's my mothers insistance on totally ignoring my pregnancy that really gets me,she does it every time (this is pg is DC no3)When she does acknowledge it its only to tell me how her pregnancies were harder/easier/better/worse than mine hmm

Cucumberscarecrow Sat 27-Jul-13 20:03:32

I'm also happy with all the standard pregnancy questions. As Alconleigh says, it's just polite small talk and I find it much easier to converse enthusiastically about something so important as pregnancy than the weather, holiday plans and similar small talk topics.

tedmundo Sat 27-Jul-13 20:10:48

I hated my bump being touched, even by family members.

But the endless questions never bothered me. Actually with strangers I would respond with disarming honesty about how tough the last few weeks were, prem labour scare etc. The old 'uns loved it! A bit of chumminess had such a lovely outcome. Nice chats and smiles and everyone's day was a bit brighter. I know it is annoying but small talk cosmos so little. (Sorry to be a Pollyanna but my nan is probably one of those old dears asking you lot the questions and I feel bad she is probably annoying the pants of most of you!!).

With friends asking I would reply 'do you want the stock answer or the truth?' Hahah! Then they'd get 15 mins of non stop moaning!

ballstoit Sun 28-Jul-13 07:52:56

'Haven't you got a telly?', when I was pg with dc3.
Apparently I missed the memo that says you can only have a 3rd child if you have had 2 DC of the same gender.

Rollermum Sun 28-Jul-13 09:52:21

I don't generally mind the questions - except 'was it planned?' (No)

Observations about my size annoy me. I've also got a bit bored of people telling me not to lift light things / walk a short distance or in the case of my Mum (bless her) blow up a balloon. As someone who has been playing a full contact sport (roller derby) and lifting weights for years I find this shift into being treated as ill quite difficult. I am lucky to have been well so far and I can feel my limits.

My Dad also said now I'm pregnant I must wear a seat belt all times. I was born in 1982 - it would never occur to me not to wear a seatbelt! He's also convinced I will have an epic fall at some point :-/

TheSilverySoothsayer Sun 28-Jul-13 10:13:10

Give us oldies a break smile We like to remember our own pregnancies and being asked inane questions ourselves And we try to offer female solidarity and share our fellow feeling, even though ours is long in the past...

ringaringarosy Sun 28-Jul-13 11:41:29

the only one that irritates me is when they ask how long youve got left,well seeing as im not having a planned c section i have no idea,some time 3 weeks before or after my due date i guess?

CornishFirstTimer22 Sun 28-Jul-13 11:53:23

I totally get that the vast majority of people are just being friendly/ making small talk/ being genuinely curious, like said in OP this is purely just for fun to allow us to have a bit of a moan wink (at a time when it comes particularly easily)

No offence to the question askers at all.

I just think that I sometimes miss the conversations about other things too, when you're pregnant, that pregnancy is the default topic of conversation for so many people, and I do still like talking about other things too sometimes smile much as I also love to talk about my little bean with close friends and family.

FoofFighter Sun 28-Jul-13 12:20:55

I think you'll find people are only venting on here, and are in person very polite to all the questioners... why can't we moan about this like the majority of posts on MN in general are moaning? hmm

BrainGoneAwol Sun 28-Jul-13 12:37:29

Ahh, I don't miss some questions.
DS was the result of a long, hard journey and pregnancy was mostly ok so I was happy to share the enjoyment. BUT endless comments on how small my bump was (he was a good 8.5lbs in the end) did actually make me begin to worry after a while.

Why people have to touch the bump is beyond me. It's still me you're groping... the baby is actually inside.

Xiaoxiong Sun 28-Jul-13 12:40:23

I also don't mind most questions as it's just small talk but hate the "oh you're so huge" and "you must be ready to pop" comments, because a) I'm only 30 weeks so no, I'm not ready to pop and b) being huge is not a good thing. Apart from the attendant discomfort, wear and tear on my body, inability to give birth vaginally last time because of baby size etc, I had a gestational diabetes test on Friday and I'm worried about the result.

I know it's not malicious but it's really hard to respond to politely. It should be the kind of "small talk" that is frowned upon, like telling a married but childless couple to get a move on and have kids - apparently innocuous but you have no idea what they are going through, don't want kids, want to wait, or even worse if they are trying but no luck, recent MC, IVF etc.

Xiaoxiong Sun 28-Jul-13 12:42:42

X posted with Brain - our two comments juxtaposed perfectly demonstrates why any comment on size is hard to deal with, whichever way it goes.

mustardtomango Sun 28-Jul-13 14:33:31

Its not quite a question, but my mother recently commented on how big I am (27 weeks), any how i look ready to give birth right now. I pointed out people do get much bigger than me so far, and the reply was simply - 'oh no, I don't think you'll find they do.' hmm really? Followed by the same message on feet: 'oh no, people's feel don't get any larger during pregnancy' and a swollen foot comparison ('my feet are huge too! ' um..... Really? Have you seen my flippers?') it didn't bring out the best in me.

TheSilverySoothsayer Sun 28-Jul-13 15:51:02

I know, OP, and I wrote my post in the same spirit smile

blimey it's hot, how are all you preggers ladies doing? wink

CruCru Sun 28-Jul-13 16:30:44

I'm getting quite bad tempered with advice. Last time I gave birth, I didn't want to go away somewhere for a few days as it was the week before my due date and the person who asked me said it would be fine to give birth at [random hospital not the one I'm booked in at]. She looked a bit surprised when I said DH had to be there.

I've also been told that I MUST have an epidural / natural birth / water birth / etc.

I do get quite bad tempered when pregnant though.

MyChildDoesntNeedSleep Sun 28-Jul-13 17:12:29

To be honest, these days pregnancy/babies etc bore me, so I only ask pregnant ladies questions to be polite. Seems a bit rude to ignore such a big thing. Didn't realise people were exasperated about it! hmm I loved talking about my pregnancies when I was pregnant.

Wibblypiglikesbananas Sun 28-Jul-13 17:27:10

Inane question from MIL (said crouching down and speaking at my midriff):

'And how's baby today?'

Which then requires me to reply that the baby is fine, thanks. The whole bending and speaking to my stretched stomach skin does my nut in though. I think she thinks it's endearing. I think it's ridiculous.

And breathe...

The other comment I get (am in the US) is how small my bump is (6 months gone). Well, no, it's actually measuring bang on according to my Dr!

PeaceAndHope Sun 28-Jul-13 17:48:52

The question that annoyed me the most was - Will you continue working?

Umm, yes. Most women can work while they're pregnant and many women continue with their careers even after they have the baby.

My family is used to small baby bumps. Mine wasn't huge, but it definitely wasn't small. Not exactly known for their tact or sensitivity, they asked me the following question- Is it supposed to be that big? What did the doctor say? Poor thing, maybe you should watch your diet.

angry

PeaceAndHope Sun 28-Jul-13 17:50:09

Oh yes, and even I was constantly told to have a natural birth/hypno birth, water birth etc.

SugarPasteGreyhound Sun 28-Jul-13 20:08:07

I feel a bit worried now. I always ask the girls I know, who are pregnant, how they are. I would never dream of touching someone's bump, or asking them if their DC was planned or not. But I do ask how they are feeling, make general conversation about the baby; I try and take my cues from how they respond. If they are keen to talk then I'll keep going with the conversation. If it's a very non-committal response then I'll leave it.

Seeing people posting and referring to people like me as 'morons' and talking about feeling like grinding their teeth, has made me think that perhaps the best thing to do would be to ignore an obviously pregnant woman and just talk about the weather instead.

FattyMcChubster Sun 28-Jul-13 20:53:24

Sugar, I think it's nice you're asking and I think people are calling names like 'morons' when people ask rude or private questions.
It's sometimes annoying when you're feeling crap, hot, hormonal, angry and upset at everything, to be asked the same questions all day everyday but that's just what happens. People are interested or genuinely asking about you.

Can't stand the personal intrusions though. How is it any of your business if it was planned or not? How rude are you?!
Oh, I look huge do I? Looks like its twins does it? Fuck off!!
When is it ever acceptable to tell someone how 'massive' they look? Growing a baby means you will be larger of course, most women don't want that endlessly pointing out to them.

Wibblytummy Sun 28-Jul-13 21:21:58

TBH I don't mind most the simple questions about the heat and hows the pregnancy going, I'm usually just honest and respond with hot and fat. They usually chuckle as they've been there and remember that feeling too.
The one that gets my goat though is, once they spot my DS and find out this one is due to be a girl, they ask the rhetorical question of "Oh well, that's you all done then isn't it?" According to most I've encountered, one of each gender ticks all the boxes and I should be signing DH up for the snip the minute this DD has arrived. Heaven forbid that I may want a third child at some point...

misschord Sun 28-Jul-13 21:56:54

I loved it when I was overdue and people asked me "When's the baby due?" Most of them visibly jumped away from me when I replied "Last Wednesday". grin

shoegal84 Mon 29-Jul-13 10:01:57

starting to worry now as these are all questions that I ask to pregnant friends and colleagues. Can I ask what questions are less annoying?

I'm currently trying for a baby and imagine that I'd love answering questions about it, but guess I might change my mind as/when it happens.

Mayanbob Mon 29-Jul-13 10:30:57

misschord I LOVE that. (hope you didn't have to wait too long mind)

shoegal I wouldn't worry too much. Whilst I get mildly irritated with some questions... I know that most of them are meant in the very best intention, and I would say that half of this thread (at least) is just a place to vent about the things you tend to only say in your head when asked the same quesetion for the 20th time that day. And I loved the questions at first, it's just after 6 months they begin to grate a little. smile

I would however, say that, in my experience, anything that relates to the size of the bump, is best avoided. Just because you don't know what's going on... And no one wants to hear they look 'huge' even if it is because there's a baby in there. It's still your body at the end of the day. I was in a situation, where the hospital thought my baby was having trouble growing. However, I was always told how massive my bump was, and being asked if "I was sure there was only one in there" - it wasn't great to hear (turns out I am in fact, carrying a whopper- so they were right, but still. This is DC1 and given half a chance I will worry about everything). This was alongside a friend who had the same worries, but was always being told how lovely and tiny her bump was.

The best response I had was from a chap I didn't know at work, who strided (strode?) up to me, shook me by the hand, gave me a great big grin and said 'well, you my dear, look delightful' This was despite being 30 weeks, round, hot and sweaty. The next best was from a complete stranger who asked me when I was due. When I told him, he fist pumped and said "YES!!" and then wished me to go on and have 5 more not sure about that part myself He seemed so happy for me. Made me happy too!

droid400004 Mon 29-Jul-13 14:58:35

totally agree FattyMcChubster! I swear the next person to tell me I look huge will get a reply along the lines of 'well at least I won't soon, unlike you.....'

When people ask 'what are you having', I tend to answer 'a baby, hopefully!' with a smile. None of their business! (Not that I know!)

apart from that I quite like chatting to random strangers about the pregnancy and complaining about the heat.One little girl asked me if I was carrying twins, she looked surprised when I said it was only one, hope the image of enormous sweaty pregnant woman stays with her if/when she is thinking of having her own kids!

chickieno1 Mon 29-Jul-13 18:07:53

mischord I was the same smile

Even better when said to taxi driver who was suddenly a lot more focused on getting me home quickly!!

AmbaRoyle Mon 29-Jul-13 18:35:06

It's my first pregnancy and probably because I haven't been that xcited or connected to "bump" (which I hate it being referred to as bump dunno why I just do and always have done) I prob hate every question.

Favourite is as bungle said "how long to go now?" Which I get asked by the same people on a weekly basis, well a week less than you asked me last week. I was just on the phone to my mum FFS and I was like well Ill be 37 weeks next week her response was - what really? Yes mum I'm due 30/08 work it out!

How is bump? Refer to previous comment about the bump thing.

I bet you're really excited aren't you? Not really

How are you feeling? Do you really want to know? I'm tired, I feel heavy, I can't stop seeing, I feel sick constantly I really want to sleep, I can't stop sweating in this heat.

Whilst working (in a pub) shouldn't you be walking round with a mop and bucket now? No! I'm only xx weeks and you are really unrealistic if you think there's going to be a massive gush of my waters breaking.

What cravings have you had? None. Or if I'm eating my breakfast in the afternoon because I've managed to get some sleep from 8am - oh is that what you're craving, cereal? No I just woke up its breakfast time.

I think I'm just generally annoyed that all anyone talks to me about is baby stuff - I am still me and my own person yet feel like my identity has now been stolen.

I also loved being asked about my pregnancy, for the most part. I was once asked "has your belly button turned into an outie yet?" By a man at work. Didn't care for that too much.

1944girl Tue 30-Jul-13 00:50:51

It has been along time since I was last pregnant, 41 years in fact.
The best remark I had was from my MIL.''You will be able to wear that nice dress when you are alright again''.

Forgive me from invading your board, I just could not resist this thread when I saw it on active conversations.

JamieandtheMagicTorch Tue 30-Jul-13 06:17:05

I agreed with MrsDeVere on page 1

TheSilverySoothsayer Tue 30-Jul-13 07:47:58

That's where I found it too, 1944girl. There are a few of us oldies around, we appear on threads and tell about the old days occasionally, usually putting [old gimmer emoticon] to signify that our experience has been gathered over a large number of decades wink

I welcomed any question when I was pregnant. I took the opening question as what it was: an opening gambit from another woman (it was always a woman) to start a conversation with someone you don't know. I'm sure I just answered with the truth, and said something to allow the other person to reminisce - like 'do you have DC?'

JamieandtheMagicTorch Tue 30-Jul-13 07:57:59

""Can you feel the baby move now?"
"Yes, it's kicking a lot"
"Can you ever see a hand poking out of your skin?"
"Uhh, no..."

Sparkeleigh

That struck me - I did used to see a heel poking out, or the whole baby rolling over. So I don't think it's ^that6 stupid a question.

I remember being an irritable bugger while pregnant too ...

Sparkeleigh Tue 30-Jul-13 08:29:24

Jamie - true, but in this case I think the guy asking had the image of a whole hand and fingers coming out - he was stretching his hand out and making grabby motions with his fingers grin

TheSilverySoothsayer Tue 30-Jul-13 08:40:50

Some of my friends had a good answer to any question regarding baby movement. They would bring in the fact that baby could kick a biscuit off their DM's belly - from the inside...

Privileged friends and rels were treated to a demonstation.

JamieandtheMagicTorch Tue 30-Jul-13 08:42:41

Sparkeleigh

Some people are genuinely disturbed by the idea of a little body in there. Their only reference point is Alien or something grin

But it is pretty weird when you think about it. Not tactful to go on about it in those terms though ...

When I was pregnant with DD1 and working as a supply teacher in nursery classes I had a few classic questions and suggestions from the children ....

When I said I had a baby in my tummy one child asked how did it get there - did you eat it ?! shock Can't remember what my response was to that !

Another made the helpful suggestion that I should put my Mum in there too to look after it - and some toys grin

I must remember the "actually I'm measuring spot on for dates" because I look huge and it does wind me up. I generally witter on about having a short body and long babies (both true) but "spot on for dates" is unequivocal.

Lariflete Tue 30-Jul-13 14:15:47

Do you know who the father is? - Random woman in the street hmm
Err yes, I do - my husband of 7 years is father to my 2 yo and current bump.
I found it a bit amusing, but particularly when I told my mum and she went off on one! grin

I think that would have given me the giggles Lariflete - flipin' cheek grin

Greydog Tue 30-Jul-13 15:22:50

I too suffered from the "you still here" brigade. Son was overdue, and after one hot day, the question "you still here was asked" and something snapped "no, I;m a fucking holographic image and the real me is on the bridge of the Enterprise near to Talos V" and I flounced home. He was born the next day, so maybe I should have lost it earlier!

excellent greydog grin - we've been watching a lot of startrek lately btw
dh and kids all addicted, but keeps them quiet !

Lariflete Tue 30-Jul-13 15:56:15

I think I might have to try that one Greydog - I've got another three weeks to go but I'm very ready for it to be born!
It was very cheeky, but it did make for a good story!

1944girl Tue 30-Jul-13 18:36:55

Thanks SilverySoothSayer I have just come back on to MN.My last pregnancy has been hogging the PC since my last post!

SaggyOldClothCatPuss Sat 03-Aug-13 18:45:38

I'm only 8 weeks, so strangers can't tell yet, but I've had a couple of annoying comments. When I was groaning and trying desperately to keep down my lunch, DP suggested that I shouldn't complain because I wanted a baby! And, my so called best friend, when I broke the news, said "that'll be you sitting on your arse for the next nine months then!" angry

weebarra Sat 03-Aug-13 20:37:21

Saggy - didn't realise you were expecting again, congratulations (I was on the Sept thread with you).

SaggyOldClothCatPuss Sat 03-Aug-13 20:40:38

<<waves>>

Shellywelly1973 Sat 03-Aug-13 21:03:13

Congratulations Saggy. I remember you too.

Im 15 weeks & only dp knows important pregnant.

When i went for my booking in appointment, the midwife asked, if this was my first baby. I said,' No, its my 6th'. She replied, 'God for a second there i thought you said 6th'.

She was rather embarrassed when i confirmed it was baby no6!

Shellywelly1973 Sat 03-Aug-13 21:04:27

Sorry on phone....bloody predictive testing. Im pregnant not important pregnant!!!

CleanAllTheThings Sat 03-Aug-13 21:42:26

The only thing i don't like being asked is 'was it planned'/ I've had it from senior staff at work and even a plumber the other day when he was doing some work for me ffs! It just feels really rude.

Cass168 Mon 05-Aug-13 12:03:11

I'm fast approaching 41 wks and am getting a bit fed up of people texting me every single day with "any news"? I know that makes me sound really miserable and it's only because they care, but numerous texts, every day since my due date is driving me mad.
Another highlight was was when my Dad rang and his first words were (no "Hello" or anything): "Oh, so you haven't had it yet then?" NO, OBVIOUSLY, OR I WOULD HAVE TOLD YOU!!
Sorry, I'm chuckling now. I need to get a grip! smile blush

MrsPatMustard Mon 05-Aug-13 12:11:28

We only went public with the news a week ago and it generated a slew of stupid and vaguely offensive questions:

1) Was it planned? (From my Mum of all people.)
2) Will your husband get a vasectomy now? (Who the hell asks a question like that?!!)
3) Aren't you scared?

My neighbour also said "Blimey, wouldn't have wanted to see DH's face when you told him!"

Just utterly astonished by the rudeness of some people...

Yes, whatever happened to the seemingly now old-fashioned response of "Congratulations !" flowers

Or if you're very unsure, maybe with a young person, or someone who already has a burgeoning brood ... "Are you pleased ?"

But basically if they told you then Congrats is usually good !

Congrats MrsPat flowers

SaggyOldClothCatPuss Mon 05-Aug-13 12:30:05

I have a new one to add...
"I assume that you have discussed the implications of having a baby at your age?" hmm

SaggyOldClothCatPuss Mon 05-Aug-13 12:31:05

NOT from any kind of health professional I hasten to add!

What a horrible thing to say Saggy - I don't even get what they mean ...

"I assume" ... is such a ** way to start saying anything !

SaggyOldClothCatPuss Mon 05-Aug-13 14:23:40

Well I am 38!
Being old, fat, having 2 late teens and a messy house makes me open season for all manner of prying questions! apparently

JoJoManon Mon 05-Aug-13 14:31:41

I actually love when people care enough to ask me questions. But I've had a few people pull top up to see my bump which, well don't mind that much but I would certainly not do it to anyone else!
On another note, Londoners have been exceptionally kind on the tube, it's only the foreigners (tourists?) that never offer seats.Truly touched.

SaggyOldClothCatPuss Mon 05-Aug-13 16:50:40

I suppose it depends what the questions are!

MrsPatMustard Thu 08-Aug-13 14:40:36

I have found that the really inappropriate responses have all come from people of my parents' generation. (Anyone else found this?)

I work at a University and all the students have been genuinely thrilled for me, bless 'em...

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