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Type 1 diabetic mums & mums to be damn that dawn phenomenon!

(998 Posts)

New thread ladies smile

BonaDea Wed 13-Mar-13 11:09:31

Thanks spotty! I tried to do the new thread but a link would have been beyond me on my phone!

dieciocho Wed 13-Mar-13 12:33:18

Argh bona, oh my god! Sorry, excitement-panic on your behalf. grin
Fingers crossed you can go home today for those few more precious days.

Well done spotty.


Hopingforno2 Wed 13-Mar-13 12:42:08

Thank goodness someone knows how to do the link spotty lol

Thats great bona hope ur dh is going to spoil u all weekend then smile cant wait to hear about baby!!

BonaDea Wed 13-Mar-13 13:28:59

Docs confirmed I can get out if my bg stays below 10 all afternoon. Had to pass on the ridiculously carb loaded lunch options - pasta bake or sandwiches and have sent DH out for a salad.

We'd actually planned a lovely lunch out on Saturday so defo going to do that still. And sleep. Just one night in hosp has made me realise how impossible it is to sleep when being poked, prodded and then listening to others going though the same!

I will admit tho there is probably a tiny wee part of me disappointed not to get to meet my baby just yet!! Keep you posted ladies and thanks for all the happy thoughts!

Am marking place for now, will be back later smile

Bona hope the BG behaves for you and they let you out! Maybe buy some ear plugs for hospital bag?!

BonaDea Wed 13-Mar-13 14:58:02

Yep, ear plugs and also eye mask essential!

Also, mr DH brought me a thermos filled with ice cubes. Absolutely genius as they have lasted 12 hours so far and means I can always have cold water and cool down! Definitely doing that again next week!!

Also, am bringing a bigger bag next week - had tried to squeeze everything into a hand luggage sized trolley but then have a little rucksack as well as baby's bag and can't fit things back in now they are out. Don't think I get any prizes for a small bag!!

I think we need more than other people because you know you'll be in longer than someone who's had a straightforward pregnancy and delivery. Always makes me laugh when you see people on OBEM going up to labour ward with the car seat grin

Hopingforno2 Wed 13-Mar-13 15:32:17

I have a large weekend bag mostly packed but will likely need to get bits n bobs brought in, what kind of hypo cures are u taking in with u? bona the thermos thing amazing lol

I took cartons of pure juice and dextrose tablets plus digestives smile

BonaDea Wed 13-Mar-13 15:54:25

I have glucose tabs, two bottles of lucozade as my main labour treatments. For after labour when I am eating again properly I have cereal bars, crackers, chocolate.

I have eaten most of my 'waiting around snacks' so will have to replace them - some baby corn and carrots, apples, crisps and mini pork pies

We went to hospital restaurant for lunch. Although it seems nice and modern the food choices were horrific! We arrived just before 2 so quite late but salad bar was empty and there wasn't any green veg in their hot selection - just beans (sugary) and turnip (carby) and mountains of chips and potatoes. Ended up going for cauli cheese as my main with some beans as a side. Now reading is 12.8!!!! Am frantically correcting and drinking water to try and reduce levels before they come back to me. They are meant to be deciding whether to discharge me based on me being below 10!!

Oh Bona, hospital food and canteens are just a massive carb fest sad hope it comes down are you going to tell them about the reading of 12? wink

Hopingforno2 Wed 13-Mar-13 17:14:31

Aww bona hope its down by the time they check u. Im a bad diabetic i love carbs wink esp right now

I just had half a plate of mustard mash mmmm

I basically lived off soup from the hospital canteen when I was in with DS when he was in NICU - least bad option, normally. Fortunately I got a parent room eventually and that had a little fridge in for storing snacks and stuff smile

Hopingforno2 Wed 13-Mar-13 19:16:36

The food 1st time round was awful! Hope its improved

Hospital food is vile. They give you so much and it's just sloppy carbs or manky sandwiches

Hopingforno2 Wed 13-Mar-13 19:29:36

lol i think my sis actually got a baked potatoe so i suppose if thats done well itd b alright

I carb counted my whole day's meals when I was in after having DD, I got something like 75g carbs for the whole day and the staff wondered why I was permanently hypo... hmm Typical food was: small bowl rice krispies and oj for breakfast, sometimes slice of toast too. Cauli cheese and roasties for lunch (only veggie option, ate that 5 days running!). "Dinner" was a small cup of soup and an egg or cheese sandwich, with an apple if they had any left.

After I had DS, DH used to bring me a portion of whatever mum had cooked for dinner with him for evening visiting <memories of shepherd's pie, peas and gravy coming with jealous stares from the first timers on the ward> grin

Our hospital gives toast only for breakfast with an option of jam of jam hmm and oj

Lunch and dinner both have hot and cold selections and hot and cold puddings. The yoghurts are ok for us too and yummy. Also get digestives and crackers and cheese with each meal and a piece of fruit. Hmm suppose it's not too bad...

Hopingforno2 Thu 14-Mar-13 07:32:39

bona hope u got home smile

Well i was battling my bg for being high last night! Though ive got a blooming head cold sad just hope it goes away as quickly as it came and best be away for my elcs

Hmm no word from Bona maybe baby will be on its way...!

Hopingforno2 Thu 14-Mar-13 11:55:46

Hi well babys trace was great and overall they said my bg were fine and mayabe down to this damm cold so back on monday for the doppler scan and clinic.

How are u bona? Are u home?

BonaDea Thu 14-Mar-13 15:26:45

Hi ladies! Got home at 10.45 last night. Have never been so glad to get into my own bed. Bp back to normal, bg levels not too badly affected by steroids. Back to assessment unit tomorrow for monitoring and possible sweep if they can get 'access'.

Off for emergency pedicure this afternoon. grin

Hoping - sounds like everything is tracking nicely!! We are getting there!!

grin At pedicure. When I went in to have ds, because I wasn't expecting it? I hadn't shaved my legs or anything wink for weeks so made dp bring in a razor. Luckily I had my own room with en suite. Glad bp is back down

BonaDea Thu 14-Mar-13 18:27:31

Spotty - this is what my recent trial run has brought to my attention!! Defo needed some urgent grooming in a few crucial areas wink Feel more prepared now!

Hopingforno2 Thu 14-Mar-13 20:40:35

bona lol im thinking im gonna have to purchase veet i cant reach to shave at least that should be easier, my mums convinced that im going to end up in earlier than 3 weeks time im hoping not!

Any hints or tips to deal with a head cold on paracetmol alone feel so rubbish!sad

Hoping can you use vix and hot water? Or olbas oil? Oh I know you can use saline nasal spray that helps a bit

Hopingforno2 Thu 14-Mar-13 21:07:41

Ooh shall need to raid the med cupboard think i have karvol somewhere, like the baby nasal spray? Shall look in to that tommorow!

Bung some vicks in a bowl of boiling water to melt, lean over it and stick a towel over your head, stay there for as long as you can stand it. Works for me smile Might make your eyes run a bit though!

I'm feeling sorry for myself tonight as I've got a blocked milk duct I can't clear and it really frigging hurts sad

Hopingforno2 Thu 14-Mar-13 21:43:54

bona lol im going to have to or have even less sleep than normal tonight! Bloody typical havent had a cold in ages now it hits me! spotty u poor thing!

BonaDea Fri 15-Mar-13 08:07:13

Ouch spotty, sounds sore. Have NO idea how to fix something like that!

Right, off to day assessment. Hope traffic is kind or my Bp will be up again. Mr Bona off to Cambridge today (we live in sw London) so he better keep his phones switched on!

dieciocho Fri 15-Mar-13 08:58:42

Poor you hoping, I think Karvol's great for colds.

Spotty, what are the symptoms of blocked duct, out of interest?

Great news; have discovered that I can do an injection in my thigh with V in the Babybjorn sling! More freedom!

Hopingforno2 Fri 15-Mar-13 09:19:08

Good luck bona hope your appt goes well.

Im trying eveything lol been feeling a bit sicky in the mornings so wont steam right now but as soon as i stop feeling sick i will gives a little releif lol

Diec I've done an injection in my tummy with Felix in the caboo sling, bit awkward!

Blocked duct is usually a lump (I haven't got one that I can feel) and it just feels incredibly bruised and tender, mine's underneath. It doesn't hurt to feed. It feels a bit better today but I did massage it until I cried mast night blush last thing I want is mastitis though

Growth scan done - mixed, tummy was over 97th centile already, weight estimated at 1.5kgs - that's about what I was expecting, given that my family have 8lb+ babies even without diabetes to contend with.

Will see what the consultant says on Tuesday I guess.

Hopingforno2 Fri 15-Mar-13 17:43:21

Rue how many weeks are u again? My baby was 7lbs 4oz on monday n ive got 3 weeks to go if that makes u feel any better

Thanks smile am just coming up 29 weeks now, this was the first growth scan. DS was born at 31 weeks and was 1.6kgs (as a triplet) so weight looks ok to me, just the tummy to worry about!

Mylittlepuds Fri 15-Mar-13 19:00:26

Rue - same with DS last time on first growth scan re. tummy and on this one.

I was induced at 37 weeks with DS as it just kept getting bigger and went into an unprintable area blush

This time we expected the same after first growth scan but second one the tunn was still just off the chart.

BonaDea Fri 15-Mar-13 20:57:57

Rue - weirdly my baby's tummy was about 60th percentile at the 28 week scan, then hopped up to 97 but has never got over. So it could well just 'stick' now.

Was in day assessment for 3 hours today. Bp still a bit 'toppy' but they were happy enough that I'm being induced Monday and so let me go.

Not before a woman was rushed in by her husband, so far in labour they didn't have time to take her one floor up and promptly gave birth in the curtained bay next to mine in about five minutes flat. Honestly, all the staff were completely shell shocked - the baby was crowning by the time they got her on a trolley! shock

shock Goodness Bona! Did it get you excited for the upcoming event? wink

shock Bona that's mental! Hope she and the baby are both ok! Glad your BP is more or less behaving, will be keeping fingers crossed on Monday for you grin

Hopingforno2 Fri 15-Mar-13 21:41:57

Sounds like you had an exciting day bona lol ooh not long cant wait to hear how u and baby get on!

BonaDea Sun 17-Mar-13 14:59:38

Definitely too much excitement for me! Both the baby and mother were fine, think the dad was completely traumatised!

Am feeling completely nervous about the induction tomorrow now. I just can't believe the day has come round at last. On one hand, I can't wait and on the other I feel I could do with another week or two! I will keep you all posted - wish me luck for a sneeze birth! wink

Take care ladies xxx

Hopingforno2 Sun 17-Mar-13 16:00:29

Good luck bona thanks are u getting admitted tonight? look forward to hearing about babys safe arrival.

Good luck Bona! It'll all be fine smile when I get panicky in labour I literally tell myself to calm down and breathe. It's a bit of a cliché but it really works and help you get back in control. I'm super jealous right now. How exciting grin

BonaDea Sun 17-Mar-13 17:50:30

Thanks ladies! Going in first thing tomorrow. Keep you posted.

Helpmeout1 Sun 17-Mar-13 21:44:47

Ahhh Bona! The end is nigh! So excited for you - we want all the details. Good luck! flowers

dieciocho Mon 18-Mar-13 07:32:40

All the best bona, will be thinking of you today.


Good luck Bona smile

Hopingforno2 Mon 18-Mar-13 10:13:36

Just back from scan&clinic starting to get worried now baby is 8lbs 1oz thats 13oz in a week!! If baby keeps up this rate will be a 10lb baby sad

Hoping dd was 8lb at 36 weeks. Remember the weight estimations can be 1lb out smile

Hopingforno2 Mon 18-Mar-13 10:23:04

I'll be 36 weeks on thus, what weight was your dd when she was born?

She was born at 36 weeks smile if you go to 38 weeks then 9lb isn't that big? Also with dd it was her head that was massive, it was off the chart!

Hopingforno2 Mon 18-Mar-13 10:35:03

They havent said anything about the head or abdomen etc just tell me the weight and whether the fluid etc is alright. If its 13oz a week then be like 9lb 11oz on the mon but almost 10lbs by the thus shock my ds was only 7lbs 10.5oz at 38 weeks she is gonna look like a sumo baby.

dieciocho Mon 18-Mar-13 10:45:43

Like spotty said, weight estimates aren't that accurate hoping
At least you have an idea of your baby's weight; they didn't tell me anything about mine at my hospital, which is why my sister had to rush out and buy a load of "tiny baby" clothes as V was so much smaller than we expected when she arrived!

Hopingforno2 Mon 18-Mar-13 11:09:38

Aww i hope so how id manage a 10lb baby after a section i dont know lol and the good news just keeps on coming just had a call to say my eye results have been changed and i will get a opthamology appt. she said that she thinks the doctor is just being very cautious as the bleed is on the borderline of where they consider to be 'close' to the central vision and its unlikely i will need treatment, the appt wont be for 2-3 months and the bleed may even have healed by then when things go back to normal r they kidding! Bg is gonna be even worse after delivery so now of course the phone call thats meant to reassure me is more of a worry than anything sad not having a good morning at all

BonaDea Mon 18-Mar-13 14:40:40

Hoping try not to worry too much about eyes - am sure it will all settle down soon enough after baby is out!

At my 36 week scan baby was projected at 7lbs 15oz so only 2 oz smaller than yours. By 37 weeks they didn't scan me but I was measuring 39 weeks by tape measure which is well within 'normal range'. Also, everyone keeps telling me a 500g / 1lb variance is completely expected. So, hopefully no sumo babies for either of us!! wink

Bit worried about the clothes we've packed - have one set for new born up to 7lbs 5oz and three sets for 0-1 month, which is up to 10lbs. No idea whether either will be right!!

Pessary has been in for 4 hours so far but I don't think anything is doing yet. Due for another exam at 4 ish. When they did the exam this morning the cervix was completely shut and they couldn't do a sweep. Pah!

Hopingforno2 Mon 18-Mar-13 15:08:04

Thanks for replying bona esp today! Yeah i have no idea what size to take so have some of both packed so far lol if it helps they tried to do a sweep on me with ds a few days before i went in and said they couldnt do it but must have done something as was 2-3cm when admitted to start pessary, hope things are happening for u.

I was okish about my eyes but was told that they hadnt changed much at all this is like 2 weeks later they call to say actually i will be given an opthamology appt?! But that i shouldnt worry, she said they are being cautious and she wouldnt have sent me but obv now im worried a) that my eyes are worse enough to be reffered and b) needing treatment with a 4 yr old and baby to look after and have to wait 2-3 months to be seen

Ds was 7lb13 and newborn was too small up to one month was perfect.

Bona which pessary have they used? My cervix was very much like yours and I started contracting twelve hours later was in established labour less than 24 hours after insertion. Hope you're not too bored!

BonaDea Mon 18-Mar-13 19:17:39

Spotty, it's propess they've used which is the one which stays in 24 hours. Have no idea if anything is happening - certainly can't feel anything as yet!!

They tried to monitor the baby an hour ago but had to give up as my scamp of a baby moved around so much that they couldn't get a decent trace. I'd have been worried except I could feel him / her moving around incessantly! The mw just laughed and said she'd try again later!!

Thinking of sending Mr B home soon - he's read his book, sent the emails he wanted to send and is now just pacing up and down. Suspect the cats would appreciate his company more than me right now!!

Bona that's the one I had and is much better for baby. I would send your dh home if I were you, if it were me I would make him stay grin dp stayed with me he slept all night whilst I was contracting though hmm

Hopefully you will get some sleep tonight and wake to some nice contractions.

The pessary made my labour go nice and gentle like a natural one it was great nothing like the WHAM of ARM then the drip.

Feel free to update at stupid o'clock as I will be up feeding ds grin

Hopingforno2 Mon 18-Mar-13 20:13:00

Oooh bona wont be long im sure look forward to seeing ur updates [smile{

Hopingforno2 Mon 18-Mar-13 20:13:25

smile even lol

BonaDea Tue 19-Mar-13 02:24:25

Well it's about 2.15 and I'm awake for fetal trace. Baby happy but as far as i can tell, there's nothing doing down below! Feel some v v mild cramp type feelings - possibly - but it's hard to tell whether this is wishful thinking! I suspect it is the latter! Come on propess, where is this labour you promised me?

Ward roasting and have already woken up several times just boiling. Apart from that, all's quiet. Bg levels are good - have stuck to my own food entirely! - and have just had a quick correction dose to combat dawn rise.

Hope everyone else is good and that the night feeders are getting some kip!!

Ah you could well be feeling something Bona!

After ds going 6/7 hours five nights in a row he's been up every two hours tonight sad

BonaDea Tue 19-Mar-13 03:19:30

That's a killer, spotty - just as you were getting used to some more sleep!

My baby has been completely konked out for the last hour so gave a lovely calm trace... Which they then decided was too calm and made me jiggle about, drink cold water and prod my bump to get a reaction. The baby eventually decided to shuffle about in response but honestly - earlier they said it was moving too much! Can't win!

You'd think they'd let you get some sleep considering you've got a bit of hard work coming your way hmm hope you're sleeping now

BonaDea Tue 19-Mar-13 06:14:27

They did leave me to it in the end but of course after that performance there's a limit to how much kip you can get. Managed to get another couple of hours - they also had both the other ladies hooked up at various stages so could also hear their conversations / babies' traces plus their lights were on. Definitely seems cruel given that I'm now expected to so some hard graft today!

Putting the eye mask on now in hope of another hour. Hope your LO has let you get some shut eye too!!

Nope no more sleep for me grin what's the plan after this pessary then if nothing's happened?

Hopingforno2 Tue 19-Mar-13 07:14:40

bona its rubbish when they wake u up to do stuff hope ur not too tired but u must be excited today is hopefully the day smile i only ever had very very mild cramps till about 4cm so you could well be dilating.

spotty only thing im not looking forward to is night feeds lol

Hoping he was doing so well! He did have 16 week jabs yesterday though and my wonder weeks app says he's going through a developmental leap.

On the plus side he goes down at seven (usually awake and puts himself to sleep) then goes straight back down after he feeds. Ds has a viral throat infection and horrendous hacking cough sad

I'm so excited for Bona's baby news!

BonaDea Tue 19-Mar-13 07:44:34

Morning ladies!

Plan is an internal this morning and then if dilated enough they'll break waters. If not, they'll try an oral version of the pessary which takes just 6 hours.

Then if nothing after that I guess it is a toss up between drip or if everything still looks totally unfavourable perhaps skip to the end and a section? Who the hell knows?! Seems like there are a lot of ifs and buts at this stage.

Really hoping to have some non-sumo baby news later today for you!!

Hopingforno2 Tue 19-Mar-13 08:13:40

spotty mayabe just the jabs that unsettled him hopefully tonight will be better for you, in all fairness im not sleeping overly much now between sore hips/legs and heartburn lol

bona ooh so excited for you! Have my fingers crossed ur progressing without the need for a drip cant wait to hear and yeah no sumo babies lol

dieciocho Tue 19-Mar-13 08:18:20

Good morning all.
Oh no, V and l've just turned on computer hoping for some baby news...but nothingwink.

Oh let us know how you are after the examination! Is your dh coming to see you? Can you get lots of walking in around the hospital? I think the six hour pessaries tend to work a little better on people who aren't favourable/on first baby.

Maybe hoping but they've never effected him before he seems happy enough! Although he wasn't drinking much just a few sucks then back to sleep hmm silly babies so illogical

Hopingforno2 Tue 19-Mar-13 09:19:07

spotty poor wee soul mayabe just looking for some comfort from mummy.

My god the snow where i am, the nursery was open had to walk usually do anyway but my legs r killing me lol

BonaDea Tue 19-Mar-13 10:48:25

I sometimes feels bit under the weather after a jab so perhaps he is just in the same boat and will be right as rain soon

Hoping- be careful in the snow.

Argh, just had internal and NOTHING has happened. Just waiting for doc to come and discuss the 6 hour pessary. Hoping she can give me some reassurance that it is worth trying at least.

Hope to get up and about following this exam - go for a wander and a coffee. DH is here for the day now so at least I have some company!!

Oh how disappointing Bona sad not time to give up hope yet though!

Hopingforno2 Tue 19-Mar-13 11:03:30

Oh no bona lets us know what they say, hope the 6 hour one has more effect for u!

Good luck Bona, hope the next pessary does its job!

Spotty - there's a hideous growth spurt at 16 weeks that lasts about a fortnight, I remember DD with it and being really put out that she wasn't sleeping 11pm to 7am like she was grin

BonaDea Tue 19-Mar-13 14:34:02

Next pessary in. Pleeeeeaase let something happen this afternoon! If not, they are scheduling me for a section tomorrow am! hmm

Hopingforno2 Tue 19-Mar-13 15:02:09

Aww really hope it works for you bona but il be honest and say if not your far better off with a section the drip is horrible and for most ends up in a section anyway. Let us know good luck thanks

Oh Bona! I second what hoping days re drip. Good luck!

Rue he's 16 weeks actual but 11 corrected?

DS seemed to do growth spurts on his actual AND corrected age, greedy bugger grin so it could be anyway?

Hmm interesting so you think he could hitting the four month sleep regression? Dd never had that I was hoping it was a myth wink

Hopingforno2 Tue 19-Mar-13 17:49:18

spotty& rue my ds never slept for more than 3 hours till he was around 5 months lol im hoping girls are easier?? Seems friends with girls have had more settled babies anyway.

Hopingforno2 Tue 19-Mar-13 17:50:42

Oh and as im 36 weeks thus should i start to try n express so bf has more of a chance of working?

Hoping I don't think it makes a difference to whether you will be successful at bf or not but it's good for the baby to have colostrum if you can get it

BonaDea Tue 19-Mar-13 18:47:26

Hoping, the main advantage to starting getting colostrum is that if baby has low blood glucose at birth and you are advised to 'top up' you can do it with your own milk not formula. Ditto if little one has to go into scbu and you are not there - they can syringe feed with your pre banked colostrum.

Buy some 5ml plastic syringes from
Boots plus breast milk freezer bags. There are loads of videos on you tube showing how to do it. Colostrum into syringe, full syringe into bag, bag into freezer.

I might be sectioned tonight as they are v quiet! Alternatively tomorrow morning first first thing. Bloody cervix is clamped shut like you wouldn't believe!!

Oh Bona sad but exciting that you're on your way to meet baby how exciting!!

dieciocho Tue 19-Mar-13 19:12:41

Oh bona poor you, the lack of exact info. must be infuriating! V and I are still crossing our fingers for everything to go how you'd like smile.

Just back from first post-baby diabetes clinic appt. - my HbA1c is 7.2, so I'm happy as I was sure it'd be about 10
Am being referred for a pump as dr. is worried about my range of bgs - currently 2-16

Hopingforno2 Tue 19-Mar-13 19:32:01

bona you poor thing i hope you find out soon what they plan to do, is that 6 hours ur pessary has been in??

Ok shall try to start getting colostrum then anything that will help smile

diec thats a good hba1c dont they kinda expect bg to be very variable for a bit after birth?? In all honesty i was just abdoned never seen by anyone but my nurse at gps who does check up on diabetics i plan to insist on a hospital check up this time!

BonaDea Tue 19-Mar-13 20:20:34

This is becoming infuriating. First they said tonight, then tomorrow morning and now they are talking about tonight again as they already have 4 electives booked in for tomorrow. Not sure how long they plan to keep me in a panic!!

Meanwhile have had to dispatch mr b home to get the colostrum from the freezer - I was advised to bring it in at the past minute because although they can refrigerate they can't freeze it and we thought it would be tomorrow for sure. He's in a right panic and I hope he doesn't crash the bloody car! He should be back within a 15 mins or so. confused

Meanwhile, bg is dropping because of the adrenalin I think and I'm supposed to be nil by bloody mouth! I'll have to ask what they want me to so about that!!

Gosh Bona! If your levels are dropping they will put you on a sliding scale. If you're having a semi emcs then I, personally, wouldn't be too worried about one extra drip especially as epidural can make you shake etc

Sorry didn't finish...

Meaning you might not be up to testing or injecting.

Hopingforno2 Tue 19-Mar-13 20:36:38

bona how rubbish when do they plan to tell u! I think i will be on a sliding scale for elcs too they suck but i guess do take the pressure off you bg wise. Ooh baby could be here soon smile

Bona - how annoying! I hope you get an answer PDQ and that Mr Bona gets back with the colostrum!

I get sliding scales for ELCS too sad hate the things. I did try and get the anaethetist to put ALL the drips through a branched cannula last time, but he didn't manage it (I was on 3? drips I think) so had them in both hands.

Re colostrum harvesting - I was given a leaflet today about a clinic the hospital run that is specifically for people advised to harvest colostrum, I'll try to go along in a couple of weeks, but I think they actually hand out the syringes etc for us to use which will be handy. Especially as I'm leaking already and it seems daft to waste it!

Antenatal appt earlier was mixed - as expected there was some concern about the stomach measurement being off the chart on Friday, so I'm being scanned again next week (Thursday) and will see the consultant again the following Tuesday. Fingers crossed things stabilise a bit. DSN was lovely though and we've tweaked my pump settings a bit on ratios to see what happens as I've been getting some higher-than-normal readings in the evenings.

Diec - hope you get a pump, they'd have to fight me to get mine back grin it's a steep learning curve though and can be frustrating to start with. I assume you carb count already? If so, you're at a massive advantage from the get go. Best things about my pump: bolus wizard - tell it how much carbs you're eating and it'll work out how much insulin you need based on what you've programmed in about your ratios. IOB - it'll calculate whether you need a correction or not based on how much insulin on board you already have. BG reminders - this is new for me (changed pump at the end of last year) but whenever I give a bolus it lets me set a BG reminder that alarms on my pump when it's due. And fine tuning - my basal rate changes about 6 times a day, and ranges from 0.75 units/hr to 1.8 units/hr - something that's just not possible to achieve with injections.

Sorry for the essay lol

Mylittlepuds Tue 19-Mar-13 22:19:20

Hi all - sorry I've been away. Been so bloody manic. Mainly with hosp appointments!!

Bona - I'm hoping the baby is on its way by now! Fingers crossed! Thinking of you and excited for you!

Re. Scan measurements - I had one scan Mon and one today (they needed to check something with placenta, all fine). I'm 34+4 and yesterday several measurements competely off the chart inc AC today just AC off the chart (by less). Yesterday the baby was apparently 7.3 and today 6.13... So it just shows you it really does depend a lot on the person doing the scan. I was skeptical when my DSN tried to tell me this when AC first started going mental but I believe it more now.

Hoping...not long now!!

BonaDea Wed 20-Mar-13 02:08:50

I have a perfect baby boy! Section took place around 10 pm.

He is 7lbs 11oz and has been feeding. First BG was 3.4 which they were happy with and I've just topped up with a couple of mls of colostrum from a syringe to ensure next reading is also good!

So happy and freaked out. Just getting feeling back in lower half now.


Congratulations Bona!! So pleased for you and a perfect weight too! thanks

Argh went to bed at 6 and woke up at 13 sad going to up my levemir 1 or 2u?

BonaDea Wed 20-Mar-13 07:08:17

Thanks spotty! Am so thrilled!

I'd go with 2u, I always do with levemir. Then add a 2am test the first night (if you are not already up peeingwink) to check its not too much!!

dieciocho Wed 20-Mar-13 07:16:43

A million congratulations bona, I really hope the caesarean was ok for you.
What a good weight and a fab bg reading! grin

Congratulations Bona grin fab weight, I hope the BG readings are all good.

Hopingforno2 Wed 20-Mar-13 07:46:44

Aww congratulations bona what a nice weight too thanks

BonaDea Wed 20-Mar-13 08:30:18

So lucky - his last three readings have been 3.4 so they are really stable and everyone is happy! Not sure he is on top of breast feeding just yet but as he's less than 12 hours old 'ill let him off. wink

Hopingforno2 Wed 20-Mar-13 08:33:22

Aww bona thats great! Glad he is doing so well smile

That's really good news Bona. Is he quite sleepy? I think no matter the baby/mum bf is always hard until your boobs have settled down a bit. Hope you're feeling ok?

Hopingforno2 Wed 20-Mar-13 12:15:23

Just noticed ur post puds yep not long at all! Are u going in at 37 or 38 weeks?

dieciocho Wed 20-Mar-13 14:05:57

Good to see you again puds, was wondering if you were in the same situation as bona... grin

Hopingforno2 Wed 20-Mar-13 20:22:37

rue i had been meaning to ask i said that they had changed my eye results to say i had to see opthamology to see of i need treatment or not sad its playing on my mind a bit tbh the woman i spoke to seemed to think it was just a very cautious doctor and i would be unlikely to need treatment but also that i should mention when i do get an appt that i just had a baby (she said it would take 2-3 months for appt!) in your experience if it was bad would they have me in sooner? Also did your eyes improve postnatal?

Eyes are normally a bit bonkers during PG and immediately postnatal - takes a little while for them to settle down (this applies to everyone eg prescription changes etc not just us lucky diabetic types!). If it's background changes then 2-3 months is unlikely to make much difference I think though, and they might choose a wait and see approach rather than aggressively treating, as stuff can resolve by itself and the treatment (laser) creates scar tissue on the edge of your retina which is a risk and can cause issues with vessels catching on the scar and that causing bleeding, also retinal tears/detachment (highly unlikely so don't worry about that one really!).

That's my non-medical understanding of how it works, anyway. I was actually at the Moorfields clinic yesterday (as well as antenatal, busy day for medical stuff) and am going back in about 6 weeks for the 3rd trimester check, so far things this time are remarkably stable which is a massive relief considering my past history.

Mylittlepuds Wed 20-Mar-13 22:51:16

Ahhhh!!! Congrats Mr and Mrs Bona! Welcome to motherhood - tis quite a journey! How are you feeling?

Hopingforno2 Wed 20-Mar-13 23:00:40

Well they said initially i had only one more micro bleed an that my result was pretty much the same however they have now said that after my pictures were looked at a 2nd time they want to check me as it might be closer to my central vision its on the 'borderline' when i said what does that mean she said she measures it as being ok but the doctor measures differently and made the final decision. The woman i spoke to seemed ok with it even said it may have healed by the time im seen postnatally but Im a worrier so concerned this means im on a downhill slope sad and even tho the sensible part of my brain says if it was urgent they would have u in by now and there is a long long path before my vision would be affected i keep worrying about being blind and not seeing my dc grow up. Stupid i know and hormones are not helping. Sorry i keep repeating myself but my oh and family dont really get how much it worries me

I was blind for ~6 months when DD was little, it's scary but there are things out there that help. EG the hospital referred me to adult social services who provided stuff that helped day to day, and also gave me access to support groups (didn;t use them due to tiny baby in tow!) and offered to take me out around my local area to teach me how to get around.

Also, don't forget that a) there are treatments (vitrectomy) even when you've lost vision and b) often eyes are not affected at the same time so you would likely be able to see out of one eye for most/all of the duration of treatment. And to give you an idea, it was about 4 years between initial changes/laser treatment and the massive bleed I ended up with (and mine was caused by going on the pump and having a massively improved HbA1c in too quick a timescale - gradual changes in HbA1c and staying relatively stable control-wise should mitigate that risk).

Hopingforno2 Wed 20-Mar-13 23:36:35

God rue that must have been soo scary! Im not sure id cope if im totally honest it scares me to death. Sorry if this is too intrusive but did u lose ur vision then get it back again? Ive not been a good patients diabetes wise with exception to my 1st pregnancy i feel so stupid now and wish id been more careful, im still not great patient i eat things i shouldnt but my bg levels seem ok as i allow for it in insulin doses and my hba1c is around 5% Also 4 years would normally seem a long time but in this respect doesnt feel long at all. Also im worried that my control will be worse for a bit postnatal and this will worsen things too sad def no more babies for me. Is what they said even likely? Could things improve and return to normal?

Yes, I had a vitrectomy in one eye when dd was 6 months old, which fixed that eye and restored vision. Then one on the other eye when DS was 1 yr old which fixed the other - and eg I have my driving licence back which obv I'd had to surrender.

I honestly think you'd surprise yourself if it came to it - you don't have much choice but to cope, it just becomes normal life for a bit. I was fortunate because we live in London so public transport is good and I got a freedom pass off the council (free z1-6 travel card) so could still get around.

Hopingforno2 Thu 21-Mar-13 08:23:55

Thanks rue cant seem to drive it from my mind just now i think its the thought of not being able to see at all that has me panicky more i guess if one eye was functional i would get by, where i live would be a challenge and have most likely irrational thoughts that my dc would need someone else to look after them. The most annoying thing is this is the best my control has ever been and during the 'couldnt care less' years my eyes were always perfect! Even through the rapid hba1c improvement of preg with ds. Im 30 this year is that young to have changes or not? God the person i see when i do get my appointment is gonna hate me when i hit them with sooo many questions. Im just really hoping they say its fine or stable anyway and you dont need treatment. I only remebered last night as i was tossing and turning that she said they were prob just checking there was no fluid leaking?

dieciocho Thu 21-Mar-13 09:44:08

rue, hoping l was told at eye appt. last week that l now have a small amount of plasma leakage - is that the same as a bleed? Dr said it'd clear up when l stopped bf-ing and got my sugars under control again.

dieciocho Thu 21-Mar-13 09:45:55

Btw rue thanks for sharing your eye story - goodness me, what an experience shock.

Hopingforno2 Thu 21-Mar-13 09:53:34

diec im not sure but i think thats what they have reffered me to opthamology to check, did i have background changes previously? Does bf affect ur eyes as well then? confused

Hopingforno2 Thu 21-Mar-13 11:10:02

That was meant to say did u have changes prev too diec

dieciocho Thu 21-Mar-13 11:17:25

No, no changes for about...2 years hoping.
The only way bf-ing might affect your eyes is that it causes big changes in your sugars and your general control - well, it has done for me anyway smile.

Hoping what they don't tell you is that you don't necessarily lose your sight completely - it's not like being in pitch dark. There's swirly blood in your vision, but as you move your eye around it moves too, and it's often possible to either kind of look out of the corner of your eye (peripheral vision), or look one way then back in the other direction quickly, it takes a moment for the blood to swirl back into view so you can see for a bit.

I was 29 when I first had a bleed (in one eye, which cleared all by itself), and I was 36 when I had the 2nd vitrectomy. It's more to do with how long you've had diabetes - I was dx in 1984 so a fair while! Rapid changes in HbA1c are one of the biggest risk factors - even if that change is an improvement. Eyes like the status quo, they're not fans of change.

Will be back in a bit, got a preschool run to do now! grin

Hopingforno2 Thu 21-Mar-13 12:01:04

Hmm i know it shouldnt but it does make me wonder if bf is going to be right for me thats if baby takes to it anyway, as selfish as this thought is bottle has done my ds no harm and i want my eyes to be ok sad any thoughts rue and diec? Also did u have background 2 years ago then diec?

Hopingforno2 Thu 21-Mar-13 13:07:47

Sorry we must have been posting at the same time rue well i was officially diagnosed around 13 years ago but looking back think i may have been diabetic most of my life but with no treatment it got worse if that makes sense? My mum says i used to cry for 8 hours solid as a baby and was always drinking then got food posioning at around 7 or 8 and my metabolism totally changed i put alot of weight on, when i decided to loose it as a teenager i lost lots fell below 8 stone and almost fell off a horse while jumping at around 17 when i was finally diagnosed but as ive said i was a crappy patient forgot to take my insulin, ate lots and spent weekends drinking how stupid was i!! Guess im just feeling a but down about it all i cope with having to fo mdi and test bg etc but this just makes it seem like it rules my life sad

Hoping I was hospitalised for a week after drinking too much and not taking my insulin. We all do it try not to beat yourself up thanks

Hopingforno2 Thu 21-Mar-13 13:24:28

Thanks spotty looking back i see how stupid i was but im not sure id have listened if any1 has tried to tell then i was in denial i think. Had really poor control postnatal with ds but suffered pnd for a few months following his birth not that it excuses me its just the reason i was so lax then in 2011 at xmas time my mum had a heart attack n my control once again suffered it was like 11% truly awful but was 7.5 by the time i fell pregnant and was in the 5s within 3 months which is the probable cause for whats happening i just hope i dont need treatment and it settles after this baby is born! Got an appt for trace at 2pm and have to take my 4yo ds should be fun lol

My HbA1c was rarely below double figures for over 10 years - I had an eating disorder specific to diabetics, where you use (lack of) insulin to control weight. Not that that has ever been recognised by any of my consultants/nurses (I've never really told anyone) - it's only by joining some online support groups that I realised it even existed and with hindsight could see actually what my behaviour was IYSWIM. That and my DH was incredibly supportive and I found someone who would look at the issues I had fairly analytically and suggest ideas that had some chance of working (eg applying for pump funding) so here we are. I honestly don't know what would have happened by now if I hadn't been funded for a pump.

The feelings I had a few months ago about this pregnancy (which I posted a bit about at the time re not testing etc) scared me because they were similar to how I felt as a teenager when this eating disorder thing kicked off - I got very skilled at saying the right things to HCPs, not testing for weeks/months on end and making up fairly realistic BG readings sad To my shame I'm still very good at bullshitting HCPs and have to consciously decide not to...the leftovers of what went before, I suppose.

Eventually I came to the opinion that I couldn't change what I'd done in the past, only how I deal(t) with it now, and my control has been much more stable and I've been much more open/involved in treatment etc than ever before. Long hard road to travel though.

Mylittlepuds Thu 21-Mar-13 14:12:16

Hi ladies. I'm going to be really rude here and post without reading back through what's been happening. Just after some advice. I've hit 35 weeks today and for the last two days I've been having unexpected lows - one was 1.7 - and insulin requirements definitely dropping. DSN said reduction in insulin normal at 36 weeks but 35? I'm concerned but DSN doesn't seem to be. I know it can be the sign of a failing placenta...anyone else had this what did it mean?

Puds I had it and they got me in that day for steroids, ds was born four days later. I've only ever heard that blood sugars raise towards the end but I'm no expert....

Mylittlepuds Thu 21-Mar-13 14:29:30

So frustrating that it's not being taken seriously! Can you remember how many weeks Spotty that you started having lows? How much you dropped insulin by?

With dd I was about 35 with ds I was 34+6 and my insulin requirements for breakfast halved in two days. I don't know much about it though only my experience

Mylittlepuds Thu 21-Mar-13 15:25:50

My insulin requirements have halved for lunch and dinner. I've just spoken to a diabetes consultant and he said to lower my insulin!!!!!!!! To say I'm f******d off is an understatement. I honestly don't know what to do as noone is taking it seriously.

I'd turn up at your assessment unit and ask for a trace/monitoring tbh. Phone the labour ward maybe and see what they say?

I don't know puds I'm sorry I can't help. If my nurse had said it was fine I would have believed her but I really trusted her and my consultant. I just really thought insulin requirements kept going up...

Hopingforno2 Thu 21-Mar-13 16:13:32

rue like i said bad bad patient and yes ive done it too after ds was born i used my diabetes to shift some of the weight to my great shame now i was old enough to know better, perhaps the change in my eyes will actually put all things ie weight and feeling down afterwards in to perspective this time and is the kick up the a**e ive been needing as prev everyone and everything was put before me looking after me. Im not perfect now but instead if just sticking to a dose and eating carby foods/choc i increase my insulin and test again 2-3 hours later to see if correction is needed and i never eat choc/sweet things outside meal times im hoping the cravings will go with delivery of baby and my bg has been more stable including them weirdly enough.i cant thank tou enough for your support, thinking i may need it for a while yet no1 quite undertands like sum1 who has been there thanks

puds yes me, i dropped a bit but only like 2-3u from 34 weeks and my dsn didnt seem concered either but my consultant then had me scanned the following week to check fluid/bloodflow and all was well tho baby is huge. They now check my twice a week clinic on mondays trace today. When are u at clinic? Are going in at 37 or 38 weeks? Mine have went back up a bit well the levemir has anyway

Mylittlepuds Thu 21-Mar-13 16:40:14

I've simply turned up at the maternity assessment unit - great minds Rue! I've just read your post. Any idiot can tell me I need to reduce my insulin - no shit Sherlock!!! Surely common sense would tell you that if insulin requirements drop by 50% it needs investigating. I have no faith at all. I'm in a T1 pregnancy support group and a few ladies to who it's happened to have been whipped straight in, and a couple given emergency c sections at 35/36 weeks. It makes me so annoyed that I have to force the issue. Yes I could understand a few units here or there but such a drop - and still going low??

I could scream.

Hopingforno2 Thu 21-Mar-13 16:45:37

Ive had similar issues but not such huge drops in requirements and it is a worry though they are keeping a close eye on me so just doing what they say for now and my trace today was fine, lets us know how u get on.

Mylittlepuds Thu 21-Mar-13 17:00:57

Another consultant has just said 'well as long as you're dealing with the hypos I'd recommend cutting your insulin.'

I'm on CGM and know the way my body reacts to food and insulin so well and he wanted to know what the lowest i'd gone today was. I was trying to get across to him that I'm not concerned about the bastard hypos, it's the sudden dramatic drop in insulin. Anyway they're not concerned at all and I don't know what to do. I'm on a trace now and all fine but that's not the point!

What can I do other than trust them? Not a lot really. He was going on about me having a 1.7 yesterday and 'we need to avoid hypos.' WTF! Am I not making myself bloody clear?!

Hopingforno2 Thu 21-Mar-13 17:07:13

Its so frustrating isnt it my dsn actually didnt have a clue i dont think! It was only at the clinic i felt heard are u there soon? Can you get in touch with them i had to wait it out till the monday from the thus but luckily all was well and they r watching me and telling me to just call and come in if concerned anytime.

Argh puds I don't know what you can do sad they must know what they're talking about though confused

Mylittlepuds Thu 21-Mar-13 17:16:03

Hi hoping. I can contact them tomorrow do hopefully I'll get more sense out them then. It inspires NO confidence at all when two t1 diabetic consultants can't understand the point you're trying to get across. All they're bothered about are the bloody hypos! Do they not think I can deal with a hypo?! Ahhh rant over.

It's looking like 38 weeks at mo Hoping but given what's going on I have a real feeling it's going to be earlier...

Hopingforno2 Thu 21-Mar-13 17:27:42

im 38 weeks too so far despite the fact baby was 8lbs 1oz on monday and my back is starting to really feel it so im 4th april but i dunno this lil scamp has done everything her own way so far so im taking bets on going in to labour on like 1st of april and no1 thinking im serious lol

Problem is puds that often the diabetic consultants don't know much about pregnancy ime, you need to see the obs/gynae consultant really I think.

I would come right out and say that you've read (via diabetes uk or whatever) that sudden dramatic drops in insulin requirements are a sign that the placenta is failing, is this the case with you and how do they intend to manage the risk?

Mylittlepuds Thu 21-Mar-13 19:00:53

Rue thanks for that - that's really helpful advice. I will def say that to my DSN tomorrow and ask her if I can speak to the obs/gyn.

It was very hard to not lose it given I was speaking to an 'expert'. It shocks me sometimes what a waste of time it is going into hospital.

Hopingforno2 Thu 21-Mar-13 19:23:00

My consultant is an obs/ gynae doctor who looks after diabetic pregnancy for my hospital and was the same doc i had for ds so i trust her judgement completley which is why i accepted being booked in for an elcs by her. When mine had dropped slightly she said right belts n braces i want you seen twice weekly and scanned me again the following monday to check blood flow and fluid levels . Id see if you can speak to your own consultant tommorow if thats even possible?

Mylittlepuds Thu 21-Mar-13 19:33:47

I'll ask - thanks Hoping. Ooh she's not called Sarah is she? I had a Sarah last time who used the phrase 'belts and braces'?!

Hopingforno2 Thu 21-Mar-13 19:44:48

lol no im way up in lanarkshire scotland her name is dina mclellan i found her intimadating first time with ds but she can see how hard i try and has been very understanding.

I think I'm lucky because my hospital actually runs a joint antenatal clinic. I don't know how usual that is though. On arrival we see MW for BP, weight & dip stick. Then wait to see DSN and MW together - MW does doppler, DSN discusses BG results etc. Then obs/gynae and diabetic consultant together - normally a chat about control, any specific issues, and since I'm on a pump and they normally have students in with them, we have a little show and tell session grin (and eg in my 1st PG one of the diabetic consultant's students had a look in my eyes to see the "downtown Baghdad" scarring from laser treatment...). Good job I don't mind being a guinea pig! I really like the service and find it reassuring that the consultants will often chat to each other about different aspects so they're both learning all the time, IYSWIM.

I always saw dsn, mw, ob and diabetes consultant in the same room at the same time

Hopingforno2 Thu 21-Mar-13 20:34:16

Mines is much the same rue and spotty i see a midwife diabetes nurse and/or endo as well as at least 1 consultant sometimes 2 but the final say is the consultants tho im not sure they know much about eyes guess i will find out when i ask if its better for my eyes to bf or not

BonaDea Thu 21-Mar-13 21:44:24

Puds, no experience of this but I can confirm that my requirements kept on rising until the day DS was born.

The consultant also told me to report straight away any drop immediately,especially towards the end. Have never heard anyone say that you would expect a drop at 36 weeks. I suggest asking to see a doctor rather than a mw - so much better safe than sorry.

Hey mummyBona grin how's it going??

BonaDea Thu 21-Mar-13 22:03:48

Hi spotty. Am so loving it. Today has been tough because Teddy is still not latching properly so every three hours have played boob tag, then finger feeding banked colostrum with syringe and then expressing again. After which it is usually time to start again!! Has felt massively draining aalthough teddy is a joy.

But tonight he showed real signs of improvement. We're not there yet but I think something might have clicked into place for him as he was suddenly doing more of the right stuff! Also the mw on duty tonight took a real interest and think will help me tonight.

All being well will be home tomorrow. Seems I've been gone weeks but this is only night 4!!wink

Ah that's really good news, I suppose if it isn't already your milk will come in imminently. Felix didn't latch when he was first born and didn't start rooting for about a week but at a week and a half when I first got to feed him he did really well. Sounds like you're doing a great job smile

Mylittlepuds Thu 21-Mar-13 22:09:20

Eee MummyBona!! Hope you're home soon to enjoy your gorgeous new bundle smile

I'm going to try getting to the bottom of things tomorrow hopefully. So frustrating though that I have to push this...

BonaDea Thu 21-Mar-13 23:08:55

Thanks all

Puds good luck. Totally share your frustration with you - they should be all over this like a rash to ensure everything is a ok.

The range of knowledge and levels of care I have received in relation to the diabetes since I have been in is extra ordinary. Some are clueless, some all over it, some happy to trust I know my own condition and treatments , some clearly haven't learned anything new about diabetes since the days of mixed insulin!!!

Will need to post some details of it all when I get the chance. It might all help someone else in the future. Right, 11pm boob tag beckons! grin

Mylittlepuds Fri 22-Mar-13 07:13:45

Hoping I'm thinking this one is going to come early too! Hope your back's not too bad :-( mine is starting to niggle.

Just to check with everyone re my falling insulin requirements...my dawn phenomenon has now totally stopped too????!!!! Did this happen to anyone at around 35 weeks?

Totally went for me but it's not something I really struggle with anyway.

Re hospital staff not knowing what they're talking about. When ds was in SCBU one nurse was explaining to another about ds and said to me 'why were you induced again? Oh yes because you had poor control' angryangryangryangry still makes me angry now stupid woman.

Hopingforno2 Fri 22-Mar-13 08:02:56

puds yes for around 5 days i stopped having to battle the morning rise my levemir was reduced by 2u then it came back not as severe but still there and had to put it bk up plus another 2u but my rapid hasnt gone back up by much.

spotty thats shocking!! I doubt i could have held my tonge wtf do they know! I hate sometimes that even health prof dont seem to understand what a struggle managing diabetes and real life is!

Mylittlepuds Fri 22-Mar-13 08:09:09

Oh well that might be what I need to do Hoping. I put it down by 1u last night but was up in the night hypoing. They better take me seriously today....

Spotty I'd have been absolutely livid!!!!! The ignorance! Oooh I've gone slightly red with rage thinking about that!

Hopingforno2 Fri 22-Mar-13 08:45:43

puds i had a cpl night hypos and a fair few during the days before i adjusted my doses still do but it seems to vary alot wg i woke up at 8.2 yesterday despite taking 4u at 4am took an extra 3u with breakfast and was rose to 11.8 by 11am sad took 4u and was 5.4 by 13.15 when i had lunch then went low by dinner! Im not sure whether feeling stressed worrying about my eyes is affecting it or not of im honest.
Def phone sum1 who listens today dont let then fob u off

dieciocho Fri 22-Mar-13 09:29:17

I can second bona's experience towards the end puds - my insulin requirements kept on rising, no drop for me.
But I blooming heck your team sounds infuriating!

Good news bona, you sound human again! And like you're both doing well. Have you named your little man Edward? smile Or is Teddy just the equivalent of "sweetie" etc?

BonaDea Fri 22-Mar-13 10:04:15

Oops - forgot to tell you we'd named him Ted! Full name is William Theodore Surname.

Long story but basically we both loved Ted but DH wanted Edward and I wanted Theodore. DH thought Theodore sounded too posh as a first name (he has a 'posh' name and feels it was a curse as a little boy!). So our slightly odd compromise was to call him William with Theodore as a middle name but to actually use Ted as his given name. Complicated enough?!

It's a lovely name Bona smile DD would have been William if she'd been a boy, but DS is actually Edward grin

dieciocho Fri 22-Mar-13 11:55:34

How weird: no joke, but I had a premonition that you'd call him William when I heard that he'd been born. Spooky shock
Theodore is a lovely name!

Lovely name!! I also live Theodore but as dp is common says f instead of th it was a no go hmm

BonaDea Fri 22-Mar-13 12:00:07

How weird with the Williams and Edwards!

Urgh. Ted has lost 12% of his birth weight and they want to put him on a feeding plan including formula. Currently hooked up to a pump even tho milk not in yet. Did this happen to anyone else?

Hmmm Bona.... Ds had formula before my milk came in. There wasn't much I could do about it. But that was to do with his sugar levels not weight gain.... Umm I say post in the breastfeeding topic as you will get the best advice there. Also have you asked to see a feeding specialist/lactation consultant? How do you feel about formula? I think your milk will come in this evening tbh in the meantime keep pumping you can completely avoid bottles by opting for cup feeding, syringe or even tube.

Also they know your milk isn't in of course he won't have gained weight like a ff baby or a bf baby who's mum's milk came in after two days....

Hopingforno2 Fri 22-Mar-13 12:16:46

What a lovely name bona my ds has had our baby name picked since we found out what we were having lol

Do any of u guys take (outwith pregnancy) any supplements? Googling is prob not my friend but have seen suggestions of taking cartiod supplemnets to help with eye help and a few that help with bg control?

Hopingforno2 Fri 22-Mar-13 12:17:23

*eye health

Mylittlepuds Fri 22-Mar-13 12:19:44

Gorgeous name!!! My DS had formula in hosp for BS levels and I then went on to breastfeed for 10 months - so try not to get too worried just yet. Hard I know. Hope your milk comes in tonight smile It's quite an experience!

I know it's a bit lazy but I'm not going to harvest any colostrum...I just don't want to add more stress to the situation. I'm just going to rely on syringe ff if the baby is low and then bf (hopefully - my toddler is going through a weird clingy stage which may make things difficult!)

So....have spoken to DSN. I reckon requirements have dropped by about 30% rather than the 50% I initially feared. Anyhow they're just not concerned at all and the only advice was to watch the baby's movements (which always sounds vague to me) and reduce insulin accordingly.

I'm still really concerned about it but I trust my DSN and I'm not sure what else I can do?

Hoping I was on 3u per 10g for lunch and dinner and now on just over 2u per 10g. Is that much more of a drop than you?

Hopingforno2 Fri 22-Mar-13 12:36:54

puds since 30 weeks i havent been able to work out a ratio at all do have mostly stuck to similar things for breakfast/lunch and my only varation is dinnertime or if im out n about. Very roughly if say im still on at least 3u per 10 for breakfast, this has just risen back up the way from 2u between 34-35 weeks lunch im now around the same myb slightly less and dinner is pure guesswork tbh on around 35u of rapid more if im bad and eat out tho strangley ive found a small chicken tikka kebab requires much less insulin than id normally have i guess the only carbs in it is the small pitta bread but the tons of chicken and salad in it r filling and i feel like i can join in takeaway night lol

dieciocho Fri 22-Mar-13 15:40:31

Bona I was in same situation with V as spotty was with F - agreed to formula for V's low bgs, but switched to breastmilk as soon as mine came in (day 5)
She's now only on breastmilk and we're persevering! It's not easy, I'm shocked at how hard something so "natural" is, but she's growing and smiling more each day grin

BonaDea Sat 23-Mar-13 06:57:14

Oh ladies. Had a terrible day yesterday! Teddy's fine but I had a total meltdown about his weight loss and feeding etc. just when I thought it was all starting to click into place I suddenly had mws and docs going to great lengths to tell me what was going wrong, that they were worried and didn't I just want to do the right thing by topping up and forgetting all this silly bf nonsense. Then just when I needed him to carry on his good work feeding, teddy became really fractious howling for food then basically just biting me. There is a two hour period in the middle of the day when I can barely remember what happened or what conversations I had - it was just a blur of misery and tears!!

God that all sounds really dramatic. Like a said I think a lot of it was hormonal. Day was saved by DH keeping his cool and also by one lone paediatrician who realised that although he has lost some weight and was a touch dehydrated actually he's fine in himself, weeing and pooing normally and that we could just keep doing what we're doing for another day. Felt such a state tho and so vulnerable!

Did one of you ladies one time mention that babies of diabetic mothers do sometimes lose a bit extra because their weight is potentially artificially higher to start with? Or did I dream that?!

Oh Bona, poor you! I would definitely say it's hormonal. Thank goodness for your dh and that one dr.

Any sign of your milk yet? The meltdown you had (if you don't mind me calling it that?!) would suggest it's on its way.

Are you able to have a whole day of skin to skin today to try and encourage it in? They should have a resident breast feeding specialist, I would ask to see them.

I think that babies born to diabetic mums do gain weight more slowly....ds was born on 98th centile and has settled on about the 30th. He would never have been so big if I wasn't diabetic.

If they do want him to have some formula then he should only need a few ml. Don't think they're going to try and give him a 3oz bottle.

If you want me to post on the breast and bottle feeding section on your behalf then I will smile

Umm can't remember what else you said as I'm on my phone and it's taken me ages to write this!

I'm really surprised and quite saddened that the drs and mw wanted you to go onto formula so much. I wonder if there's a supportive mw you can get on your side to advocate for you?

dieciocho Sat 23-Mar-13 07:30:12

Yes, definitely see the hospital's/PCT's breastfeeding specialist - my one really helped (huge support and lots of time for me).

Yes, probably hormones or the drugs wearing off (?) - the day of V's birth is much like your middle-of-the-day period: I can barely remember it, just a massive amount of crying!

Sorry, don't know anything about the weight gain stuff for babies of T1s. T is your baby though, so what you say goes - you taught me this, so don't forget it!wink
The big hug smiley appears to be missing.

Hopingforno2 Sat 23-Mar-13 08:01:14

bona i hope today goes better for you and i really hope u get to bf like you want.

With ds i really wanted to but he was just such a lazy feeder and my milk didnt come in till like day 6, i beat myself up about him ending up on bottle and im pretty sure its part of the reason i got pnd but looking back i realise i tried and ds is a tall happy almost 5yo now smile not that i wouldnt persist just dont feel bad thanks

Ohdeargod1 Sat 23-Mar-13 08:16:22

Bona - you sound like you've had the dreaded Day Three a day late!!! It's a weird day after acing your baby when your hormone levels massively drop. I had a panic attack and extreme anxiety on my day three - and was very upset DS would never be three days old again blush

I second that it could be a sign that milk is imminent!

If you want my two pence worth...if it was me I'd syringe feed the formula (if he still needs it) and most DEFINITELY persist with BF, if that's still what you want of course.

Hope today is better :-) flowers

Ohdeargod1 Sat 23-Mar-13 08:16:41

* after having

Ohdeargod1 Sat 23-Mar-13 08:30:34

Oh dear god is me (mylittlepuds) smile

I thought so puds, could tell from your posting style smile

Oh bugger off snow hmm

dieciocho Sat 23-Mar-13 16:50:06

I was v. confused and thought some strange new person had just started
posting! confused
Ok, so you're ohdeargod now, or maybe just god wink?

Ohdeargod1 Sat 23-Mar-13 18:26:10

Ha ha ha!! I'm undecided...I think mylittlepuds is probably more accurate (my puds really are quite little...)

Ohdeargod1 Sat 23-Mar-13 18:27:21

That would have been really funny though. Just a totally new random person dishing out advice.

BonaDea Mon 25-Mar-13 06:14:25

Definitely owe you guys an update but for now will just say - the meltdown was definitely my milk coming in / hormones!! Section happened late Tuesday, this all happened on Friday so the Day 3 test fits!!

Teddy is now gaining weight well and his sodium levels are back to normal. He still has a touch of jaundice but under the treatment threshold so no photo therapy etc.

We were finally given the all clear to go home late last night so escaping this morning thank god. I've been here a full week, Teddy for 5 days. Enough's enough.

Sugar levels have been great so far probably through luck as I haven't paid them much attention. As the bf is now really ramping up I expect things will get more bumpy!

Hope you are all well. Who's going in to have our next thread baby?

That's great news Bona grin so glad everything is going well and you get to go home! It's quite an experience when your milk comes in isn't it confused

Ds went down at 7 woke at 00:30 and is still asleep! I've leaked through two breast pads, my bra and a muslin into my bed covers hmm

Hopingforno2 Mon 25-Mar-13 08:02:31

Glad things are going better for you bona and teddy is doing well smile

Im next confused unless puds(deargod) beats me to it lol we r only a week apart, im an elcs a week on thus unless lil madam has other plans

dieciocho Mon 25-Mar-13 08:16:33

That's excellent news bona - urgh, poor you; a week would've killed me!

Oh spotty, I know the feeling - V sleeps for 4 hrs, then 3hrs most nights and l soak muslins and my pjs, so have started using maternity mats to protect bed sheets.

He usually only does three hours diec smile my poor boobs! I think it's because he's under the weather-got a horrible cough

Hopingforno2 Mon 25-Mar-13 09:47:08

Well almost time to set off for clinic not sure if final one as next monday is easter monday and i get admitted the weds night. What are the chances of getting my questions re my eyes and bf answered do u think? Id like to know what effect it would have as i know even without my eyes it would be a challenge and i dont want any progression (yes its still very much on my mind)

Good luck Hoping - tbh I don't know whether you'll get many answers about eyes at the clinic, I think endo consultants only know the basics about eye complications IYSWIM and rely on the eye specialists to deal with them. Can't believe you've only got just over a week to go! EEK grin

Bona - glad you're getting home today, don't be surprised if it takes them till tea time to actually discharge you though... (voice of bitter experience x2!). Feel free to strop and tell them you're discharging yourself, normally gets a MW to turn up and do their checks.

Spotty - hope you're feeling slightly less explode-y by now grin you can always try hand expressing a bit to take the ouchy off if you need to! I'd forgotton about the delights hmm of waking up with soggy bra, pads, sheets, matress.

I've had to bump up my basal level again by another 20% today, done it temp to see what happens, and will switch over tomorrow or Wednesday if it seems to be working. Whole weekend was fairly horrible with continual corrections, and looking at my pump daily totals of insulin delivered, I've gone from about 50u/day on average 2 weeks ago, to more like 65u/day at the moment shock. The joys of hitting 30 weeks, not.

Hopingforno2 Mon 25-Mar-13 12:31:58

rue 30 weeks is when everything went funny for me too ive given up trying to work out a ratio. You were right when i asked about breastfeeding and my eyes the only thing they could say was bf lowers ur bg like that was something i didnt already know! Im so unsure what to do for best if im honest.

Has anyone done the dafne course? Im thinking of asking to be reffered for it tho it takes around a year to get a place in my area.

dieciocho Mon 25-Mar-13 14:29:55

Yes, DAFNE is a carb. counting course, which is obligatory in my area for anyone wanting a pump...errr, I've not done it yet as I can count carbs. in my sleep!

dieciocho Mon 25-Mar-13 14:30:56

Sorry, mis-read your comment hoping - thought you said heard of

Hoping if it was me, which it obviously isn't, I would still breastfeed and at least see how it goes. You might find you're able to control fine after a couple of weeks. I think you said someone said your dr is probably just bring over cautious so for me the benefits of breastfeeding would outweigh the risk of at least trying until my next appointment and then seeing how my eyes were.

Have you thought about trying to get a short phone consultation with the eye dr? They will obviously know more

Hopingforno2 Mon 25-Mar-13 16:38:55

Hi spotty it may well be worth trying to get a hold of an eye specialist to talk to but as i havent seen them yet im unsure who to speak to or if they will have seen my eye pics. My eye screens take place at local health centre and i think the refferal will be at a large hospital about 30-40 mins away(a different one to where i will give birth and the dsn etc are) im just feeling really scared about it still, i guess its the 1st complication that has come up for me really sad may all be a moot point as i was unfortunatley unable to bf ds as my milk took almost a week to come in and by that point id given in and started bottle as ds was starving, i promised myself i wouldnt put myself or another baby thro that hell again.

I think anxiety is just settling in all round for me as the birth gets closer, i feel unable to get the eye thing out my mind im sure im actually quite irratible. Im worried about how ds will take to a new baby and having the same quality time together and things like that. Losing my mind a little lol

Oh I think everyone gets anxious towards the end. There's definitely no point in getting too stressed about it (the feeding) you do have to consider the rest of your family too. Maybe try to keep an open mind, see how you feel after the birth? Do you want to bf? Because if you only want to do it because you think you should then it really isn't worth the stress smile if you will be happier deciding to ff then go for it. I ff dd smile

BonaDea Mon 25-Mar-13 17:40:31

I've done dafne. It is a well put together course but I found it a bit silly as I'd been carb counting, using ratios and correction doses etc for ages anyway. But if you feel like you could use a refresher on the basics it could be good!

We were discharged late morning. I had my first ever panic attack while getting ready - I thought i was desperate to get home but clearly a part of me was worried about it. You lot must think I'm a nutter - two meltdown in one week. Was lying on the bed shivering uncontrollably, crying saying to DH 'do t let them see me like this they'll keep me in!' Weird.

Boobs are now massive and sore so have spent the afternoon in bed with teddy feeding, pumping and snoozing skin to skin. Absolutely bliss!!

We are still cup feeding top ups of ebm. Did anyone else do this? Need to keep going til teddy isn't so jaundiced but it is so restrictive as I'm either feeding him or pumping or cup feeding.

You ladies have been great this week. Thank you xxx

Hopingforno2 Mon 25-Mar-13 17:45:34

Thanks spotty I do/ did want to bf but as the birth approaches memorys of the tears shed trying to with ds and seeing my sister managing to but having to give up due to hormone induced rash and obv worry re my eyes im starting to feel less convinced its the right thing for me but i will try to contact eye people and keep an open mind it may be much much easier than with ds diff baby diff gender etc

Bona how is teddy feeding? Is he still sleepy? I never topped up once we went onto bf ds was jaundiced and needed photo therapy prior to this. Hopefully you won't need to do it for long because pumping makes you really engorged. Maybe worth getting a lactation consultant in a few dats time? Might help to put your mind at ease?

Hopingforno2 Mon 25-Mar-13 18:12:22

bona im glad feeding is going a bit better for you smile i was desperate to get out with ds feeling panicky is pretty normal im already starting to feel it. I dont feel i carb count properly as such tho im ok at judging by looking at what im eating what i will need and i correct already so i guess i am doing it hmm it was the normal earing part that looked appealing i do mostly but feel guilty.

dieciocho Mon 25-Mar-13 20:46:11

bona the feeding/time management/emotional craziness will all get better - I didn't believe it when I got home 10 weeks ago, but it has done. smile Your DH sounds supportive, so that's a massive plus. Fingers crossed you'll get a good Community MW who'll also support and encourage you in any decision you have to make.

Bona - my sympathy! We mix fed DS for months once he came home. He was allowed to BF for an hour per feed, after that I had to unlatch him and we topped him up with a bottle of prescription formula. Because he was so small & prem he wasn't strong enough to take a full BF for ages. He fed every 3 hours (we had to wake him for it, 24/7) and took at least 1 1/2 hrs per feed. Looking back, I have no idea how we coped, but we just did. IYKWIM.

I can also remember the feeling DH and I both had with DD when I was discharged from the hospital - something along the lines of "are they just letting us leave? But we have no idea what we're doing!" grin

Sorry Hoping meant to add:

There's an online version of DAFNE available here if you register on the website. I think it's the Bournemouth diabetes team that have put it together. I've not actually done it, but I have registered...it's the thought that counts, right?!

Hopingforno2 Mon 25-Mar-13 21:34:01

Thanks rue i will register with it, ive admitted before i just end up hungry and really resentful of diabetes if i try to omit carbs and i think i might go mad, im guessing we r all the same but i have why me moments when everyone else just wanders around munching like i want to lol my dad bless him still trys to feed me all of the time i only wish i could say yes

dieciocho Tue 26-Mar-13 07:25:08

I've registered with the Bournemouth online course too, but I have actually looked at the tasks! They're mostly picture tasks along the lines of "Look at these pictures of a banana and a glass of water. Which one has more carbs. and how many units would you inject?" hmm

BonaDea Tue 26-Mar-13 08:45:43

I've also done that online course. It is not that clear to navigate (or wasn't a few years ago when I did it) because there were some more complex / less patronising tasks tucked away in some of the modules. You saying about the pic of the banana diec - one of the things on Dafne I hated was when they made us play with plastic food portions. I felt it was utterly degrading for a bunch of adults (and I told them so!).

spotty thankfully I have a lactation consultant already. She had seen me ante natally to help me with the colostrum expression and came to the hosp twice while we were in. She is coming again tomorrow which is great to work on teddy's latch which is improving but is very pinchy. She's also referred me to a tongue tie person as he has about a 50% tt. Hosp said it was not an issue but I def think it is hindering how well he feeds from me. Finally we're seeing a cranial osteopath as Ted has quite a tight mouth / jaw which again is making it tough for him to latch really well and contributing to the pinching.

My DH has been such a star. He is managing our timetable for feeds and pumping, doing all the cup feeds, sterilising everything, feeding me, making sure i nap and generally being wonderful. I couldn't have wished for better support. grin

Can't wait to drop the pumping and cup feeds - it will mean I'm one hour on and two hours off instead of the other way around. Ted seems to be getting better at feeding from the breast each time so hopefully sorting out the tt and getting to the osteo will make all the difference and let us drop the cup!

Bona that's really good news. I suppose once the tt is cut you'll be able to hopefully stop with the cup feeding? So lovely that your dh is being so involved (especially after reading some of the threads on here hmm)

Ds only woke once again last night shock but is refusing a nap this morning and I want to make a cake!

Hopingforno2 Tue 26-Mar-13 09:32:27

Glad feeding is going better bona so dafne isnt really worth it then? I must admit im not great at carb counting i seem to either over or under estimate esp when i try to do it by the book so to speak i get on better for the moment with my own way but i like the idea of eating more freely it actually says in the faq on dafne website can i really eat what i want, yes with the exception of sugary drinks! Seems too good to be true but it would be great to be free of the food guilt esp when know im thinking eveything i do could/is damaging my eyes so much so my bg has rarely been above 5 since i found out i was low most of last night (yes im aware im a nutcase lol)

Hoping there's an app (and a book you can buy) called Carbs and Cals, that's really useful and shows pics of meals/foods on different sized plates along with how many carbs are in them so it helps you figure out how much you've got. Might be worth looking at rather than DAFNE?

Hopingforno2 Tue 26-Mar-13 13:46:30

Thanks rue il have a look. Still feeling scared about my eyes prior to this i felt fairly confident about adjusting my doses and eating now im paranoid i think the heartburn, restless legs and achey hips after sleeping on 1 side after a while are prob making it all seem 10 times worse but for now its really getting me down sad i know i need to try an push it out for at least a few weeks till baby arrives and things settle down a bit (hopefully i will be too busy to think too much)

If I drive to my next eye appointment will they refuse to do it or will they do it without the drops? I never used to have the stupid drops anyway...

Hopingforno2 Tue 26-Mar-13 18:39:59

Ive never had drops at my routine eye appts tho im thinking when i go to the scary opthamology dept i will sad is this a follow up after baby? Or an annual check spotty

Follow up. I never got the third trimester one has had ds before I had it!

Hopingforno2 Tue 26-Mar-13 18:59:38

You will prob be alright then, how old is ir ds now?

17 weeks yesterday 4 months today eek!

Hopingforno2 Tue 26-Mar-13 19:19:08

wow time just flies in doesnt it! I think it was my 2nd eye screen i joined this thread and i dont know what id do without u all now

It goes too quickly! Last night ds slept 7-4:15 and 4:30-7. I'm just waiting for it to all go wrong!

Hope everything is ok with everyone today smile

BonaDea Wed 27-Mar-13 15:30:11

Spotty - sounds marvellous. Am waking Teddy every three hours then takes an hour to feed (so then two hours til next feed). Tiredness is hitting me in waves!! Mr Bona is spotting me for naps but it doesn't always happen!

Oh don't worry Bona it will get better at least he goes three hourly and doesn't want feeding every 90 minutes grin

dieciocho Wed 27-Mar-13 17:52:26

spotty how do you manage to get F to go back to sleep in just 15 minutes?
V wakes at about 2am or 3am (having gone to sleep at 9pm or 10pm), but then takes AN HOUR to go back to sleep!shock
We check her nappy, I feed her, then...rock her/stroke her tummy/stick a dummy in/whatever it takes to get her back to sleep.

Diec I'm really sorry but I appear to have popped out a self settler.

At night I feed him at 6:50 and put him straight down at 7/7:10 and sometimes he's asleep sometimes awake but either way he goes straight down no problem are after night time feeds I just put him straight down. I never change him at night unless he's pooed (which is never).

He will also have a morning nap in his cot. I just put him down whilst I get dd dressed and he puts his thumb in and goes to sleep. He doesn't always do it but mainly does. It's since he found his thumb really. He also only feeds for about ten minutes. He is 17 weeks though smile

BonaDea Thu 28-Mar-13 02:26:22

Spotty , I think Diec and I might have misses the order form for self settling baby! I have to rely on T being totally pisses on milk to just pass out!!

He will get there! When ds was in his Moses I always rocked him, it's only since he went into his cot smile

dieciocho Thu 28-Mar-13 08:43:42

Ok, that's encouraging! Except we haven't got a co t - DP's friend is making it - and V is faaassst outgrowing her Moses basket... shock

Oh I bet, how long until it's finished?!

dieciocho Thu 28-Mar-13 16:05:01

Well, he's been making since I was 3 months pregnant and we said we'd like it for when I go back to work (3 weeks time shock), but I've only seen one side of it so far...so I'm thinking she'll have it when she's about 2!

Oh goodness how are you feeling about going back to work?

Growth scan this morning has worried me - abdo circ now off the top of the chart, weight estimated at 5lbs (am 30+4 today). Not seeing consultant till Tuesday, but not expecting to make 38 weeks on the back of those results. Will report back when I've (hopefully!) got some answers though. Next scan booked in a fortnight.

BonaDea Fri 29-Mar-13 08:53:58

Rue, try not to worry. Am trying to remember where I was at 30 weeks but failing. Wish I'd taken a copy of my notes as they have now disappeared into the ether.

I know we all say it a lot, but the scans are wrong a lot!! In was given an estimated fetal weight of 7lbs 15oz at the time of the 36 week scan with an estimated 38 week birth weight of well over 8lbs. Teddy popped out a v average 7lbs 11oz at 37+6.

Let us know what the consultant says.

Had teddy's tongue tie snipped yesterday so hoping for some improvements on feeding. MW coming tomorrow so just hope hope hope that he has gained weight! Quite nervous - think it is a hangover from being in hosp where I felt we were being judged!!

Rue like Bona said they can be miles off try not to worry. Hopefully your consultant can reassure you.

Bona I hope there's some weight gain. Try feed him up before mw comes wink maybe tape pound coins to him wink

I've got another blocked duct sad

Hopingforno2 Fri 29-Mar-13 09:57:18

rue my baby was estimated at 5lbs 1oz at 30+4 so much the same and 8lbs 1oz at 35+4 and im still not getting my elcs till im 38 weeks exactly tho it has meant i need an elcs due to the risk of sholders getting stuck and uterine rupture(apparently pessaries increase this risk) due to prev emcs

Ok i need you all to tell me how silly im being i think or i hope its hormones and im not gonna cry till monday! My parents have not long left with my ds to blackpool for the easter weekend along with my sister and her baby and i cant go sad no room in car never mind im 37+1 and have a trace on monday. Ds will have a ball but i cant stop crying i miss them already how pathetic is that!

BonaDea Fri 29-Mar-13 13:29:29

Not pathetic hoping! Hormones to blame! Just think tho - you can have a lovely lazy weekend, napping lots, eating lots and watching rubbish on tv! grin

Hopingforno2 Fri 29-Mar-13 14:45:55

Yeah thats the way i should be looking at it but i just wish i was with them or they were here sad oh is working all weekend too so is just me on my lonesome for pretty much the whole time

How are you doing Hoping? Hope you're ok and not too lonesome!

Spotty - hope the duct sorts itself out pronto, it's no fun.

Bona - fingers crossed that the tongue tie snip has sorted the lack of weight gain, do you know when the MW will be round to weigh?

I've calmed down a bit now, thanks ladies - it's useful to hear what weights you were given as estimates compared to birth weights, I'd forgotton quite how out the estimates can be. So here's hoping he's not actually 5lb-plus yet. DS (who was born at 31+3) was 3lbs 8oz at birth so it's possible.

Hopingforno2 Fri 29-Mar-13 23:28:59

Im okish have tried to keep busy but still have waves of being weepy that ds is so far away as well as everyone else sad well apart from oh but he will be at work and doesnt Delete: feel show emotion all that well

BonaDea Fri 29-Mar-13 23:38:58

I am clearly v anti social - I usually love having the occasional empty weekend just for me!

T has fed so much better today so am hoping the snip has done its job. We've just totted up 9 feeds since 1am this morning. We were trying to aim for 10 per day but I'm starting to think its a physical impossibility.

I am soooo tired. How anyone does this with another child to look after I'll never know!

Hopingforno2 Fri 29-Mar-13 23:49:47

bona i dont mind the odd day but im so used now to even when he had to stay over with my parents when i was working i seen him each day that its strange plus he is very cuddly when its just me n him an i miss that. Im thinking its just bcoz when he gets back its only a cpl days till i go in to hospital and the worry over how im going to make mummy time for him with a newborn is setting in big style plus just how will i manage 2 after a elcs

Bona it is hard with two but at the same time the second one is much easier, plus you've probably already had 2+ years of no sleep wink

Getting ten feeds in a day does sound hard are you still topping up? Ds still feeds every two hours in the day and once he was about six weeks was feeding two hourly an night too. I'm glad the feeding seems to be getting better smile

dieciocho Sat 30-Mar-13 09:19:17

That's good news bona, l'm v. pleased for you, although agree that 10 feeds a day sounds like a massive undertaking!

BonaDea Sat 30-Mar-13 10:30:02

I do mean 10 over a 24 hour period rather than 10 in the daytime. Anyway, as it is we've settled on 9 I think!

Currently DH is v keen that I keep napping whereas although I do want to nap I'm starting to feel trapped at home! Might venture out for a coffee later - oooh er!

Ooo Bona would that be your first public breast feed?! Costa is good for seats I find. I went to bed at the same time as ds for the first 12 weeks as I couldn't nap I found that helped.

Hope puds is ok??

BonaDea Sat 30-Mar-13 12:39:03

Would be first public feed but might just time it between feeds and do that next week! Totally incapable of feeding without getting whole giant boob out for the time being. Not subtle!!

Good point. Where is puds?!

BonaDea Mon 01-Apr-13 07:16:26

Did everyone eat too many eggs and hot cross buns and go to diabetic hell?

I didn't get any eggs sad nor has dd yet! My sister is coming over later though. Ds is back to two hourly feeds-four month sleep regression??

BonaDea Mon 01-Apr-13 13:06:33

Good god that sounds terrible. Is that night and day?! I'm on 2.5 hours and its killing me. T's latch has gone to pot as well and my nipples are rawhmm

Yep day and night. Except right now as he has been asleep nearly two hours, last feed three hours ago. Are you engorged? Ds always has bad latch after a growth spurt due to that. I'm in a lot of pain on one side too due to having a milk blister. I think I got rid of it and it just needs to heal confused

Breastfeeding is great when it's going when but really awful when something goes wrong!

Hopingforno2 Mon 01-Apr-13 15:07:39

Well final trace done and dusted, in weds night for section around 8.30am on thus confused

Eek hoping! Exciting!!!

BonaDea Mon 01-Apr-13 23:08:15

Hoping that is so exciting. They are such bastards (scuse my French) making you go in on weds night. Like a night in your own bed isn't the best thing for you!!

Remind me - do you know what you're having? So nice to have another thread baby. X

BonaDea Mon 01-Apr-13 23:09:28

P .s remember to take giant pants and over bump leggings or jogging bottoms for after. Nothing under bump for you!

Hopingforno2 Tue 02-Apr-13 08:27:40

bona how r u? i know i dont really see why im in weds night as last time they didnt start the stupid sliding scale till the morning! Yes im having a girl smile every1 in my family is having a giggle with guess the weight as she was 8lb 1oz at last scan a fortnight ago hmm im hoping they overestimated!! Yep got a brand new pair of over the bump jeggings and massive pants lol i seen in boots the other day silicone dressing things for the wound but i wonder has anyone used them? As at £25 only if it works to spead up healing is it worth it.

Hopingforno2 Tue 02-Apr-13 08:28:49

Oh and has any1 managed to get the sliding scale put in 1 hand rather than 2?

I've only ever had it in one hand hoping? I've got a photo of it on fact, blood everywhere I might show you.... grin

pic the next day it tissued and I've still got a lump grin

Hopingforno2 Tue 02-Apr-13 08:54:34

Oouch!! I will keep on at them for one hand only then with ds had a drip in each hand an it was a nightmare in recovery how are u meant to do anything with legs that dont work and two drips in i couldnt even get up the bed! Took 3 attempts to get blood taken yesterday as i wouldnt let them use my hands as i knew i would be getting drip thus oh and a catheter how fun blush however the smallest silver lining is the mw reckons i will be 1st taken down so around 8.30am

When I've had operations they've always put me on a sliding scale in the evening and I've always been first down because they don't like diabetics being without food grin

Was the drip one side fluids or something?

Hopingforno2 Tue 02-Apr-13 10:12:02

I honestly dont remeber exactly, but they put the canula in both hands before i was hooked up to anything at all! I think it was actually the most painful part lol i cant think now how long do they keep u on it for? I think they left my catheter in overnight too sad

I've only ever had sliding scale in one hand too, hope they can sort that out for you Hoping.

Seen consultant this morning, still just keeping a close eye on things - scans every two weeks, see consultant on alternate weeks. She's not v happy with the growth but wants to keep a close eye on things. LO was not at all cooperative today, it took about 15 minutes to get a trace on the Doppler grin I'd have been worried except that every time the MW got close, I could see (and feel!) him kicking her away gringrin

dieciocho Tue 02-Apr-13 13:06:12

I had sliding scale in just one hand and can still see the mark - it was 12 weeks ago! Althouhh, we heal more slowly, don't we?
Good luck for tomorrow hoping!

Hopingforno2 Tue 02-Apr-13 13:16:26

rue they decided to keep a closer eye on me too but then still decided 38 weeks for elcs and that was baby weighing in at 8lbs 1oz so likely to be nearer 10lbs shock but my consultant said i was doing all i could. My little madam always goes to sleep when they put the trace on so i have to lie on a side and drink cold water lol

Right i will not be allowing then 2 hands then unless its totally needed for other fluids!

BonaDea Tue 02-Apr-13 14:47:21

Only one hand for cannulas for me too and I got them not to start the sliding scale until I was in theatre grin

Hoping - all the very best for tomorrow. Let us know when you can. Good luck! X

Hopingforno2 Tue 02-Apr-13 15:17:24

I will update when i can but the section itself isnt till thus morning i just get taken in tommorow.

BonaDea Wed 03-Apr-13 08:59:44

Hoping you say that as if I have any idea what day of the week it is - ha ha ha confused

Hopingforno2 Wed 03-Apr-13 10:32:47

lol well just incase any1 was watching out for news today wink

BonaDea Wed 03-Apr-13 17:53:13

Eeeek. Good luck for the morning hoping. I do hope you are first on the list in the morning and there are no pesky emergencies in front of you!

And: remember to shave!!

I want another baby!!!!

Hopingforno2 Wed 03-Apr-13 20:36:19

bona was given instructions not to shave or wax hmm as it increases infection risk??

Thanks guys as per usual told to be in night before then get looked at like im weird for turning up and sitting waiting on a mw to come see me unsure whether to take my long acting insulin or not grr

I would still take it hoping. Hope you get some sleep tonight. Eek!!

Hopingforno2 Wed 03-Apr-13 20:46:53

spotty fed up waiting so have taken it anyways. Getting very nervy now so prob not alot of sleep and no doubt rubbish bg levels!

Hopingforno2 Wed 03-Apr-13 21:17:14

Apparently i dont take any insulin from now on in and no food from midnight soo will need to make sure im above 5 then as have been tending to drop around 2am n really dont want sliding scale in tonight!!

You would still need your levemir though wouldn't you? I would have a slice of toast at 11:30 and not test again grin

Hopingforno2 Wed 03-Apr-13 21:46:15

Well i said that but they said no confused i guess i may be on sliding scale for day then

Well they obv don't know what they're talking about wink someone with more knowledge than us will be on soon!

Hopingforno2 Wed 03-Apr-13 22:19:24

Ha a doctor came n agreed with me i will be getting my levemir in morning!! Gotta wonder sometimes!

Hopingforno2 Thu 04-Apr-13 06:48:57

Cant sleep wont sleep lol they put my venflon in last night! So uncomfy n now im nervous lol puds whats happening with u??

Oh poor you hoping. Why so early? How are your levels? Not long now!! I had a dream your baby was 6lb something!

Hopingforno2 Thu 04-Apr-13 07:53:57

Im 1st on list n they wanted bloods so to save jabbing me twice. sad levels r good 7.0 around 2am and 4.7 this morning not hooked up to ss yet. Hope ur right spotty

Hopingforno2 Thu 04-Apr-13 07:54:50

Oh n im bloody starving lol

Good luck Hoping! smilesmilesmile

kitty555 Thu 04-Apr-13 08:52:02

Good luck from me as well Hoping - hope it all goes well.
I am following your thread with big interest for a while already as I am ttc for our 1st and I am a type 1 for nearly 34 years - so hello from me to all of you! smile

dieciocho Thu 04-Apr-13 10:45:28

Hello kitty.

spotty, did you really say up-post that you want another one already? Are you mad grin?

Thinking of you hoping. x

Ooo wonder if baby hoping is out yet grin

Diec I just want another somewhen but dp has said no sad how's everything going with v?

dieciocho Thu 04-Apr-13 12:10:03

Urgh, we've both got colds, so my sugars are rubbish and poor bubba was grunting, coughing and snuffling all night - keeping me awake. She had her first dose of Calpol because she was screaming blue murder every time I tried to feed her yesterday pm - I suppose reclining was not comfy for her.

Hopingforno2 Thu 04-Apr-13 12:16:58

Hi all baby ellie arrived at 09.37 this morning weighing 8lbs 6.5oz so rue scan was miles out!! How do i put up pics??

Felix had his first dose of calpol the other day it made me sad! hmm

Colds are rubbish hope you both get over it quickly.

I'm potty training dd at the moment so it's all fun and games here grin

Yay hoping!! Not a giant baby by any means grin you need to do it on the computer or photo bucket. Congratulations hope you're feeling ok and well done on the quick update thanks

kitty555 Thu 04-Apr-13 12:25:33

Congratulations Hoping flowers!! Ellie, what a lovely name. Hope you're feeling alright!

BonaDea Thu 04-Apr-13 12:27:49

Hi Hoping. Congratulations and beautiful name (Elena was on our short list for girls to be shortened to Ellie!). Nice weight too- not too Massive!

Hope her blood sugar results are nice and steady. Sounds like your levels were great overnight so I'd hope they'd be perfect.

Mwah. Xxx

Kitty - welcome to the thread. Good luck with everything and let us know if you have any questions. One of the first signs I was pregnant was my blood glucose readings went from great to all over the place. Being pregnant plays havoc from day one but we have lots of perfectly healthy thread babies now so the hard work does pay off!

Hopingforno2 Thu 04-Apr-13 12:31:49

Thanks ladies, im feeling ok starting to get a little sore now the epi has worn off shall do my best with the pics smile

dieciocho Thu 04-Apr-13 12:37:04

Great news! V is very happy that there's another thread girl wink.


Hopingforno2 Thu 04-Apr-13 12:58:10


Hoping she's gorgeous!! Awwwww!

converted link for those on app smile

dieciocho Thu 04-Apr-13 17:11:38

What a difference a pound and a half-ish makes! She looks so much less scrawny than V was!

She has cheeks like dd and ds, I think it's a diabetic thing I want to squidge them grin

dieciocho Thu 04-Apr-13 17:16:10

spotty even with F's 4-month regression (?) & potty training you still want another one!? You're a brave woman grin.

grin I know! I watched OBEM earlier and I frigging cried! I never cry, must be hormonal!

Yay Hoping congratulations grin and she looks fab, hope her sugars stay stable for you. And also yay for the scan weight being wrong! Gives me some hope.

Welcome Kitty smile good luck with the ttc.

Spotty - you need to work on your DH a bit! Wait till the kids are being cute together and then say something about how you miss having a baby or something, it might work? wink

BonaDea Thu 04-Apr-13 18:14:19

Hoping - she is beautiful! I need to work out how to do photos!!

Spotty- brave woman! Having said that, DH always only wanted one (I have already talked him up to 2) but the other day he said we definitely need to have another one as it is so lovely. Amazing what a tiny baby can make you feel!

dieciocho Thu 04-Apr-13 19:59:15

We know that we want two as DP is an only child and was lonely, but I couldn't have another cs. I've just written to one of my obstetricians from V's ante-natal team to ask about chances of having vbac with induction next time. Fingers crossed she a) responds and b) says what we want to hear!

Diec did you have an awful time?

Dp has completely said no won't even discuss it. I've just put my maternity stuff on eBay sad

Hopingforno2 Thu 04-Apr-13 20:59:45

Aw she isnt doing so well now im so sad, her bg dropped to 1.6 twice so she is in nursery on hourly feeds by tube and obv formula as i dont have enough. I feel so helpless and guilty i really wish i wasnt diabetic

Aww hoping don't worry most of our babies (on the thread) need some help to start with. They will stabilise quickly I'm sure. Remember to look after yourself thanks

BonaDea Fri 05-Apr-13 03:39:29

Hoping - all of our babies had some sort of a rocky start, it happens. She will come through this.

Not sure if you have made up your mind about bf / ff yet but do remember that your colostrum is like magic beans to her just now so even if you have to top up with formula it will do wonders to stabilise her. Also hold her skin to skin as much as you can as soon as you are able to get yourself down there.

Hope your wound isn't too sore. Get loads of that lovely cocodamol down your throat! wink

Hopingforno2 Fri 05-Apr-13 04:35:46

Thanks spotty and bona a mw has been helping me hand express every 3-4 hours and says ive had good volume of colostrum but only looks like myb 3mls to me if even that? Giving me crampy feelings afterwards too not that its bothering me all that much .

Latest update there was she is much the same bg at 3.2 still on hourly feeds via tube till at least morning if she gets extended to 2 hourly i may get to go to transitional care with her for a little while. I hsvent asked again re skin to skin as her temp was 'only just ok' dont want poor wee thing ending up in an incubator too sad dozing on/off just now in between 2 hourly obs and expressing and trying to wait till morning when i get catheter etc out to go back over. Oh goody just checked my bg its 3.3 guess il call the midwife!

Hoping 3ml is a good amount! I was only getting 1ml smile also that's not a bad bm honestly it sounds like she's doing fine. Are your pains your uterus contracting back? Have you seen your diabetes nurse? Hope the food isn't too nasty.

BonaDea Fri 05-Apr-13 07:36:58

Hoping - 3 ml is just fine for starting out. There is just not that much colostrum and they are all precious drops. Her wee tummy prob can only hols 3-5 ml at a time anyway!

And good news her bg is up to 3.2 as that is well within normal range for babies. Hopeful everything sorts itself out today and you'll feel better when catheter is out and you can have a shower. When does DH arrive?

dieciocho Fri 05-Apr-13 09:04:52

Oh hoping, poor you. The others are so right: 3mls of colostrum is perfect; I was told that I had loads and the most I ever managed was 5mls and that took 2hrs of squeezing!
Sugars above 3mmols at my hospital were counted as safe for babies, so hopefully Ellie'll manage to keep them up there.

Yes, spotty, whole experience was one I'd rather forget tbh, only I can't forget it and still feel angry/disappointed/disconnected from V.

Where's puds? When was the last time anyone heard form her? I hope she's ok. Her baby is due round about now, isn't it?

Sorry you had a bad time diec I had a horrendous first labour it does get easier I promise, especially after a great second one. Hopefully you can have a vbac.

Yes I was wondering about puds smile

BonaDea Fri 05-Apr-13 09:54:17

Diec- I remember how disappointed you were when you were first told a section was on the cards but i didn't realise you were still troubled by it.

Could you perhaps ask for some counselling to help you come to terms with what happened? I was actually offered this at my hospital although I didn't take them up on it

If it helps, although I am ok about having had a section, the entire hosp stay I had with T haunts me and makes me cry whenever I think about it. I am so angry that during our first precious days together the hosp were so obstructive to what I wanted to achieve, so dismissive of us as T's parents and generally so unfeeling. I look back on that week in a blur of misery.

(None of which helped by birth stories from my nct class like 'I stayed at home with help from my wonderful husband until I was 7cm dilated then baby nubbins was born 1 hour after getting into the birthing pool'. Oh just shut up!!)

Bona I feel your pain. I hate everyone who's baby wasn't in SCBU blush

Hopingforno2 Fri 05-Apr-13 10:48:11

diec a planned section itself isnt too bad im just upset because ellie isnt with me and hoping to get her back but i felt the same with my ds totally disconnected with everything trying my best not to let that happen now.

Well only got like 0.2mls there sad but its the least of my worrys just now i guess and yes getting slightly painful tummy after expressing and its fairly painful to do anything really at the monent but physio wants me to do exercises ha ok then! Waiting on them getting back to us to see if i will be moves to transitional care with ellie this afternoon fingers crossed for us ladies she is up to 2 hourly feeds.

Diec - talk to your hospital about postnatal counselling. I had ante- and postnatal counselling with DS after we lost 2 of the triplets and I had to stay pregnant for as long as possible after they died - it's a very weird situation being able to feel one kicking and know that the others aren't IYSWIM. The hospital had a specialist midwife who is trained in counselling, she was really helpful. I saw her after DS came out of hospital too, so probably when he was 3-4 months old at least, and we went through my notes on labour/section delivery/what happened in NICU too. I really felt like it let me lay it to rest.

Also I felt like DS was little more than a blob, for months, and only really bonded with him when he started responding to me (12m plus I think for us) so don't worry if you don't yet have the rush of bonding that the NCT and all the books seem to reckon you'll have.

Hoping - it sounds like Ellie's doing better with her sugars, I hope the expressing gets easier for you and you get to transitional care asap.

Hopingforno2 Fri 05-Apr-13 13:17:14

rue that must have been awful i dont know what to say. You done the best by your son tho. Feel a bit weird around ellie right now myself and man am i sore when i do anything!

The good news is we are in transitional care, the other 2 babies are teeny tiny tho proper preemies! Ellie is massive compared to them just need her to keep her bg up and she will get her tube out tho 2 hourly feeds is going to be exhausting lol

Hoping we're still on two hourly feeds hmm you get used to it grin

Rue it must have been so hard for you I bet your miracle son has made it worth all the heartache though

dieciocho Fri 05-Apr-13 16:32:40

Oh rue.

I've ordered a book on Amazon about dealing with feelings after a cs.

That's good news hoping; 2 hourly feeds sound fairly normal. Oh my god, I remember the tummy pain after V was born - I felt like my abdomen was on fire!

bona I cried whenever I thought about V's birth for the first month or so, I suppose hormones play a part in our tearfulness.

dieciocho Fri 05-Apr-13 16:41:54

If we're doing baby photos...I've uploaded one onto my profile. Feel free to have a look. It's day 2, I think.

Argh diec she's super cute!!

BonaDea Fri 05-Apr-13 19:21:07

Spotty can't believe you are still on 2 hourly feeds. I did it for 10 days and it almost killed me! Now feeding on demand which seems to mean about every 3-4 hours with some cluster feeding in the evenings...

The clusters are hard going. I feed him and within a few minutes he wants more... Unless I just allow him to fall asleep on me which I am trying to avoid during the day (confession - DS has not once slept in his cot, he sleeps on me or co sleeps all night every night!). I thought the pay off for cluster feeding was longer periods of sleep at night but so far no go!

Bona I'm sorry to tell you that when ds came out of hospital he fed three hourly. Then it went to hourly, then two. Then we had some nights of 8 hour sleeps. Then it all went to shit and it's 3-4.5 hourly. Don't worry about the co sleeping it's still really early days smile

Sometimes in the day we get three hours....if he sleeps....

kitty555 Fri 05-Apr-13 19:34:56

thanks guys! Bona, I guess I'll have tons of questions once I get there smile...
Diec, had a look at your photo - how cute!!!!

Oh also, after six weeks of going down perfectly at 7pm last night and tonight he's waking everytime we put him down. I dozed for about two hours last night with him sleeping on my chest.... sorry for the minor rant, I'm thoroughly fed up and formula is looking extremely inviting right now sad

Spotty it'll be the 4 month growth spurt still, won't it? Hang in there, it'll get better. Although you could always intro a bottle of formula in the evening (dream feed) and see if it helps? We used to do that for DD during growth spurts if I was struggling to express enough for it.

Ooh and Diec, she looks like a teeny tiny dot smile beautiful.

Hopingforno2 Fri 05-Apr-13 22:34:53

Diec she is lovely. Im not sure im going to put ellie back on the breast which makes me feel like a horrible mum but im just so sore not getting much hand expressing and terrified of her bg falling too low again and not sure il be able to manage with that and my ds. I could myb express when it comes in properly and give it to her in a bottle every other feed. Am i horrrible?

Hoping it doesn't make you a bad mil smile you can always combine feed. If you want to give her formula now then when you get home and your milk is in you can put her to the breast, even if it's just for comfort a couple of times a day...

Rue I always threaten him with formula but never follow through wink he woke after 20 minutes this evening but dp got him back to sleep quickly and he's only just woken for a half hearted feed so much better, see how he goes down!

Hopingforno2 Sat 06-Apr-13 07:13:20

She is doing well so far on formula so i very much doubt il change her as i think id be paranoid about her bg dropping and setting her back

Just realised I put mil not mum stupid iPhone! You need to do what you're happy with hoping smile

BonaDea Sat 06-Apr-13 09:18:03

Totally get that. If you can, I would try to keep feeding her the colostrum either from the breast or expressed, it is wonder stuff for her but you'll know the bgs won't drop if she is getting formula as well. Then you can make a final decision when your milk comes in - you might find you have loads of the stuff and that feeding her turns out to be easy peasy.

Of course it doesn't make you a bad mum - you have to so what you're happy with and you're no good to Ellie if you're a wreck! wink

dieciocho Sat 06-Apr-13 09:19:06

hoping V was on formula and colostrum in hospital, then when my milk came in she had expressed milk for a week. Then we moved on to breastfeeding. You could use nipple guards to protect your boobs, I find them really helpful - Medela is good.

Thanks for the nice comments about V's photo. Spotty I've seen your profile photo, is that little Felix? How cute! And what excellent fashion sense that little man has-love the babygro!

Exciting news I my flat - V slept for 7 hours last night! She was pretty noisy, grunting and stuff, but wow!

Diec that was him he doesn't look like that anymore! Will upload a more recent one later smile

BonaDea Sat 06-Apr-13 10:16:41

I need technical support - can I see all your profiles from the app or do I have to be on the website.

Diec - 7 hours!! I would kill for that at the moment. There were tears in my bedroom last night - T's latch has really gone to pot and feeding is agony now. hmm Need to get my nice lactation lady back round I think!! Any tips meantime? I think the issue is his lips are not wide apart enough.

Also I seem to have hurt something in my back. It is really sort to feed at one side because my back is crying out below the shoulder blade.

I think I might be falling apart. Oh, and its 10.16 and I haven't even check my bg never mind taken levemir!! shock

Oh Bona poor you. We had four nights of 7/8/9 hour sleeps but it didn't last. We've had problems with ds not opening his mouth wide enough. I find the lansinoh made it easier for him to latch also moving his lips apart whilst latched. Keep re latching until it feels right. I know it's a pain. Try different positions rugby ball is a good one or with him laying on your tummy. Ummm you could try nipple guards too as a temporary solution to the pain smile

You have to go on the mobile site or desktop to see profiles

dieciocho Sat 06-Apr-13 12:24:10

bona I've had terrible back pain on and off too.
The main reason early on was side effect of epidural and sleeping awkwardly due to cs wound.
Now it's because V's growing so fast and because I breastfeed lazily, ie. I just stick her on and don't think about my position.

Positions are getting hard now ds is bigger. If I'm sitting on the sofa he just spends the whole time pushing his legs up against the arm!

I've put a recent pic of ds up grin

I really hope puds is ok

BonaDea Sun 07-Apr-13 08:22:41

Yes, when did puds last post? What stage was she at? Awful but I can't remember!

Hopingforno2 Sun 07-Apr-13 11:24:58

Hey ladies, how is everyone? Well ellie is home tho i kinda wish we were still at hospital lol sooo tired! I think they must drug them in there as she was so good feeding and sleeping now its like feed, girn myb sleep for a hour then girn some more! My oh did the looking after from 5-8am while i tried to sleep and now he is sleeping.

Looking for ideas, i have electric storage heating so only convector heaters in bedroom which r smelly and very expensive to have on constantly space heater only seems to take the nip off but not heat the room hmm

Also i dont remeber being in so much pain after ds emcs but still in alot of it with this elcs?!

We have storage heaters hoping but haven't had a problem with them? It smelt the first couple of nights as we've never used our bedroom one but it's fine now.

Glad you got some rest smile don't forget to take your pain killers

dieciocho Sun 07-Apr-13 16:35:13

hoping can you call your ante-natal ward about stronger pain killers? Or see your GP? I was discharged with bog standard ibuprofen and nothing else. shock Ouch.
Community mw told me my hospital has a reputation for poor post-natal pain management and that it's perfectly normal to need stronger stuff.
I'd talk to community mw or to GP.

dieciocho Sun 07-Apr-13 16:36:59

Oh spotty, he's so handsome; what an adorable smile!

I had co-dydramol after my forceps delivery.

Thanks smile he's pretty cute most the time! Not that I'm biased...

I had a glass of wine at lunch (first one in fifteen months shock) and now feel ill

Hopingforno2 Sun 07-Apr-13 17:09:41

spotty he is gorgeous! lol on the wine! Ds has just gone away to stay at my parents again!! Ive been sent to bed in floods of tears because i didnt want him to go feeling like he doesnt want me anymore. Normal or not?? Oh thinks i mad im sure sad

BonaDea Sun 07-Apr-13 18:25:05

Hoping, great news you are home! Are you ff'ing - that will defo have got you home sooner which is a huge plus point!

What pain relief have they given you home? I was sent home with co-codamol plus an anti inflammatory. I haven't found the pain bad at all (except the first 24 hours when I was on paracetamol only by mistake, and even then not so bad) but don't have anything to compare it to...

Hoping its best you get some rest and he gets some lovely attention smile think how much dd was shipped around with ds and I bring in hjsputsl for two weeks shock she was fine though.

The glass of wine was £6.40 I'm still in shock. Shows how long it's been since I went out...

Hopingforno2 Sun 07-Apr-13 19:41:07

Thanks spotty i know he will be fine i guess i just feel so guilty that i dont have the same time to devote to him and miss our cuddly times. sad

Think my milks come in but cant bring myself to breastfeed even tho she clearly smells them and they hurt big style i was so full of good intentions too.

Why can't you bring yourself to do it? You could hand express some to relieve the pain. You know you could still ff and let her have comfort feeds from you with no pressure to do it even once a day smile

Obviously if you want to ff it's completely fine, dd was ff, it's just you seem to feel guilty about it already which makes me think you're not 100% on your decision. It could all be hormones though!

mylittlepuds Sun 07-Apr-13 20:24:15

OH MY GOD!!!!!! I can't believe I've missed a baby!!!! How the hell are you Hoping and GORGEOUS Ellie? A huge congratulations! I'm so happy for you, glad she's safe and that you're home. flowers

How is everyone else doing?! I'm so sorry I went AWOL - I'm getting induced tomorrow and we had so much to sort out! I'm petrified as the baby is measuring almost 10lb and I'm only going to be 37+4!

Please tell me I'm not going to die in labour about the baby isn't going to get stuck (and will be safe and sound).

Of course you'll be fine puds the second one just pops out smile

mylittlepuds Sun 07-Apr-13 20:43:06

Oh I bloody hope so!!!!

Hopingforno2 Sun 07-Apr-13 20:58:55

spotty i feel gulity i do but i dont think i could handle it all being up to me feeding i mean i so need the support of others ie i can go to bed and miss a feed.

puds thanks and so glad to hear from you!! We r doing ok emotional breakdowns aside. Remember i was told ellie would be almost 10lb when she was born they were very wrong! Unless in 2 almost 3 weeks she only gained 5oz?! Tommorow how exciting!! Cant wait to hear what u have!! thanks

I think this time round you need to look at it as what's best for you as a whole family and it sounds to me like ff will be best smile it's important for you to be rested and happy as you have your little boy to think of too. He can't have you stressing or wanting to be in bed all day! I'm sure you will feel less guilty once your hormones have settled down too thanks

mylittlepuds Sun 07-Apr-13 21:18:50

Thanks Hoping!!!!

I have similar worries to you re. BFing. I did it with DS with for 10 months but I really, really put myself through the mill to achieve it. I went without so much sleep contributing to an anxiety disorder I developed after DS.

Anyhow...I'm still not quite 'right' two years on. But I have discovered that sleep (or lack of it) affects my anxiety for the worse. A lot. The BFing hormone rollercoaster didn't help either.

Sooo.....not quite sure how I'm going to handle the demands of BFing this time with toddler to deal with too (and of course diabetes). I'm hoping to express ASAP but DS would never take a bottle. We're going to try it earlier on despite warnings about nipple confusion.

However I'm also thinking once DH goes back to work whipping one out will be soooo much easier than bottle feeding faff - and I suppose the same goes for night feeds.

We'll see how it goes but just to let you know I totally understand the issues you're facing. X

Hopingforno2 Sun 07-Apr-13 21:31:47

Thanks spotty and puds how im going to manage at all when oh goes back to work is something im trying not to think about right now. Is it too early to think about pnd? Im worried im heading down the same route as with ds not had a massive rush of love yet etc mayabe i just need to sleep lol

mylittlepuds Sun 07-Apr-13 21:43:31

I agonised with 'loving my DS' enough for over a bloody year after he was born Hoping. I WILL NOT be putting myself through that bollocks again. You and I know how much we adore our toddlers. At baby stage of course you love them (think how you'd feel if God forbid something happened) but at the moment you're just doing your best to look after the baby. That's the love.

I know it's easier said than done but please shelve this worry. It's silly. There's no one going to look inside your head and do a check on number of rushes of love felt for baby! Xxx

Hopingforno2 Sun 07-Apr-13 23:00:19

Thanks puds yes was same with ds and cried today because he went to stay at my parents hmm

ok so it would appear my wound has had a bleed to itself im way too tired to go anywhere tonight itl be ok till morning right?!

Good luck for tommorow puds cant wait to hear thanks

BonaDea Sun 07-Apr-13 23:39:23

Puds - thank goodness all is ok. Induction tmrw - eeek! You must post and let us know what happens.

Hoping - I think your wound will be ok til morning assuming you are not losing blood still? Do dress it with a sterile dressing if you have one at home and be sure to have it checked tmrw. I'd call the community mw. Hopefully that way someone will come out and see you at home.

BonaDea Sun 07-Apr-13 23:42:48

Ps puds - when did you try the bottle last time and when will you do it this time? Am keen to ensure I can do this with DS. I know I'm going to have to have a) a proper kip and b) a proper drink at some point so want to make sure I time it right! wink Health visitor suggested there's a window between 4-6 weeks where nipple confusion was unlikely but he would still take a bottle. Tips welcome!!

mylittlepuds Mon 08-Apr-13 06:16:39

Hi Bona! Hope all is well with you and DS smile

Right well I've just posted about when the earliest people recommend expressing with a bottle in the feeding section and a few have said three weeks.

I was ever the paranoid mum last time and dutifully waited until six weeks to avoid nipple confusion but it really was too late. He ended up never taking to the bottle until about 10 months when he lost interest in the breast and we finally found a bottle that worked (Dr Browns). It was a nightmare as for 10 months I didn't sleep and couldn't leave his side for more than a couple of hours. There was gallons of my milk wasted trying too :-(

This time we're taking the risk for my sanity! It's quite important I've found grin

Of course your DS might be absolutely great at flipping between two at six weeks. My DS was (and still very much is) stubborn as hell!!! It's good your MW said four weeks - makes me feel less bad about trying at three - if I get that far all things going well.

Good luck today puds! What's the plan of action?

Hoping I hope you're feeling a bit better today. Try not to worry about these things it's such early days and you're tired and hormonal. If I've had a bad day I think 'everybody's fed, nobody's dead' and I know actually my day has been successful grin

dieciocho Mon 08-Apr-13 07:55:51

Good luck puds! It's great to have you back with us.

spotty, your first glass of wine in 15 months!? Ooops, I've been having a v. small glass pretty much every other night carefully timed around feeds.

Also, V kept refusing to feed yesterday - screaming and pushing me away - when I thought I saw hunger signs. She managed to stretch her feeds to 4-hourly, meaning that we only had time to fit in 5 feeds in 24 hours.
Is this a big issue?
Can it be that she just wasn't hungry? I know she is recovering from a cold.

I'm not a big drinker diec grin

I would say that's fine. Sometimes there's no rhyme or reason to these things and tomorrow she'll be back to normal. Ds did every two hours last night hmmfull of beans this morning though.

Got my eyes appointment in a bit got to take both children!

Hopingforno2 Mon 08-Apr-13 08:54:25

puds huge good luck hope it all goes well thanks

spotty hope your appt goes well also.

Ok fairly tough night again ellie just wont settle in our bedroom??!!but is ok with 1 of us sleeping on couch in living room could scream! And please dont judge me as i felt this way with ds and would die for him now but i feel unable to bond with ellie. I feel like she is an inconvience and is ruining what was an easy enough life and causing my realtionship to change with ds i feel like crying about this alot sad the changes i mean. Im sooo worried about when oh returns to work and im on my own too

dieciocho Mon 08-Apr-13 09:21:23

Oh hoping, you poor sausage.
Maybe your room's the wrong temperature for Eliie? I know V prefers sleeping in the spare room (her room one day!) because it's warmer than our room.

I don't think I began bonding with V until she started smiling at me at 2 months - before that she was just kind of foreign, if you know what I mean. I blame that on the cs, personally. Being alone with her is still a bit weird.
If it happened with your ds, and improved, then you know that it can improve with Ellie. It's still very early and your body must still be packed full of crazy hormones.
(Sorry, I know you've done all this before! I'm not trying to teach you anything, just to remind you because you might be feeling a bit over-whelmed right now smile )

Sorry you're having a hard time hoping sad when is your mw coming? The important thing is to talk about it in rl so at least you're not carrying the burden on your own. Does your ds go to nursery or mil during the week? This has been a godsend to me. Also Ellie will change a lot in two weeks you will feel a lot better then.

Well eye appointment wasn't great. He only got two good pics as I couldn't have the drops. Hopefully they can get a result from them.

mylittlepuds Mon 08-Apr-13 10:31:29

Hoping - please keep telling us how you feel and don't feel alone in this. Everyone keeps saying to me 'ooooh how exciting' 'aren't you soooo excited' and I think 'well actually I'm only just regaining sanity and life after DS so no!'. I totally know what you mean about the inconvenience thing thrown into your probably-only-quite-recently-settled-again life. How old is your DS again? Mine has just turned 2.

Personally I think us diabetic lot suffer more with random hormone shite as they're already out of kilter. Anyone else share the theory? Can relate with Diec's 'foreign' feeling - I felt like that for a long time with DS. I put it down to never having been around babies before.

Right keep me sane and chat today ladies. I'm not in until this afty so a loooong day ahead. I'm nervous about the sliding scale thingy sad. Keep thinking they're going to cock it up and I'll die on insulin overdose! The MWs are NOT going to be looking forward to getting me in!

Puds I didn't have a sliding scale. How are you being induced?

mylittlepuds Mon 08-Apr-13 10:43:08

Is the sliding scale the weird insulin/glucose drip or am I getting mixed up?! I'm getting pessaries until waters break and then the bastard hormone thing that I'm really, really hoping to avoid.

Were you induced Spotty? I can't remember.

Yep that's the sliding scale. I had the 24 hour pessary and that worked. Had it failed they would have gone onto the six hour ones then arm and drip as last resort.

If I were you I would see what happens. Give your body a chance and unless necessary tell them to piss off with the drip. I had the pessary inserted at 9:30am mild contractions by bed time. Contractions I had to breath through all night then by 6am I was being sick wet myself wink and was 4cm. Was 6cm by the time I got to labour ward. Waters broke about 11:30 (?) of their own accord and ds born 12:25 with just gas and air 15 minutes pushing. No sliding scale or drips.

Being your second I don't see why the pessary alone won't work. Also if they need to break your waters ask them to give you a couple of hours before using the drip as I'm sure you won't actually need it smile have you written a birth plan?

mylittlepuds Mon 08-Apr-13 11:21:00

Oh my God Spotty that's just what I wanted to read before going in. That's EXACTLY how I'd love things to go for me this time - although I know I need to keep an open mind.

You've pretty much summed up my birth plan grin

The thing is second labours tend to be quicker so it seems silly having a sliding scale when you're only in established labour for three hours. It's much easier to get back to normal afterwards without it in and you can get straight in the shower smile

Dd has just pulled her leggings down and is stabbing her leg with a crayon saying she's doing her injection hmmgrin

mylittlepuds Mon 08-Apr-13 14:17:20

Awww!!!! Ha ha ha! I hope people don't get the wrong impression about her mum grin

I know puds I'm just waiting for nursery to want to speak to me! What time are you going in? Have you got some pâté?!

dieciocho Mon 08-Apr-13 15:06:40

That's so cute spotty.

Those of you with toddlers etc, when will you/did you start teaching your child how to help mummy when she's poorly?

Hmm not thought about it diec I haven't needed help since I was a young teen and fitted at night. She does know she can't share my chocolate when my 'sugar's low' and that I get cross and shout blush

Hopingforno2 Mon 08-Apr-13 15:26:34

Puds are u in yet??

Thanks everyone for your support, we decided to go register ellie today an take ds to soft play so im shattered but not dwelling that tends to happen most at night sad ds is home again tonight so shall see how it goes.

Have been using our convector heater to heat our room up didnt work last night fingers xd for tonight as will be up at 8am with ds either way tho i feel bad if he wasnt there too cant win lol

Hoping I'm envy of your ds staying in bed until 8am! Dd is up at six. You should stay in bed whilst your dh is off work though smile

Hopingforno2 Mon 08-Apr-13 15:50:05

spotty he doesnt always and is earliest of 9pm before he will go to bed hmm

Bg had been running low but was 11.7 this morning 6.6 by lunch so now il
worry about my eyes too

mylittlepuds Mon 08-Apr-13 17:01:55

I'm in! Nothing happening yet - just tracing baby.

Have been told by a lovely midwife despite all the possible intervention I can insist on bath labour. She said it really does help.

Anyone on DC2 totally freaked out by having another/not get their head around it? I'm freaked out!!!!

dieciocho Mon 08-Apr-13 17:43:24

spotty I didn't mean anything quite that serious, just stuff like sending your child to fetch the sweet tin/your handbag/whatever when you feel low. And, yes, not asking to share because sweets are mummy's medicine.

Fingers crossed for that bath puds. Do you know if your bump is male or female?

mylittlepuds Mon 08-Apr-13 17:48:12

No we don't know sex but now thinking it might have helped me get my head around it more!!!!

Just had pessary in. Cervix very much closed :-( had gas and air with internal and it's freaking amazing!!! I found them one of the worst things last time so very happy that it was fine.

mylittlepuds Mon 08-Apr-13 17:50:54

My DS who has just turned two says 'Mummy's sweeties' and know they're not his which is surprising considering everything else is!! It's so cute. I'm on CGM and so have a sensor on my arm that he calls 'mummy's machine' and kisses. Oh God I miss him!

Mmm gas and air!! Mine was hardly reachable puds when my pessary went in let alone soft!

Dd would get me something but I don't think she would understand the urgency.

Hopingforno2 Mon 08-Apr-13 19:06:13

pud you just described how im feeling it started prior to delivery i missed ds more while in hosp than i spent looking at my baby im ashamed to say and now i wonder what made me think a 2nd was a good idea! How are things going?

Dd LOVES ds apparently she always talks about him at nursery and she tells everyone that he's her brother smile it's lovely.

Anyway you can still do things just the two of you (you and older ds). Dd and I are going to get our hair done together before a wedding.

It's normal to feel worried but it really is fine it's lovely having two.

mylittlepuds Mon 08-Apr-13 19:14:17

This DC was unplanned Hoping so don't worry about the 'thinking it was a good idea' thing because we didn't think it was - ha!!! I find it best to be honest with DH about everything I'm feeling as well as close friends you can trust (as well as us lot) and I bet you find we all have similar feelings.

I'm just laid up after first pessary waiting for some action MNetting and reading mags. It's a nice rest!!!!

Ds has decided he can only get to sleep whilst sucking my finger hmm

Ds wasn't planned and when I first had him I kept thinking if I had planned it I would have waited until dd was at school. I'm not going to lie it was really hard but now ds is four months it's so much easier and I'm really happy (vom wink). Obviously there are hard days but it's really worth it.

Hopingforno2 Mon 08-Apr-13 20:34:45

spotty when do the good days start lol my sister keeps saying i will be fine im a great mum I sure dont feel like one right now when she starts crying all i can think is for god sake be quiet ive fed u, changed u and winded u give me peace, how awful is that!! Im horrified i feel like that!

Hoping I tell ds to shut up often sometimes blush he cries a lot! for us it got a lot easier at 12 weeks but as you're ff and she wasn't prem you might find things get easier sooner. Have you got a sling? Give it a week and you won't feel quite so wiped out which will help!

Hopingforno2 Mon 08-Apr-13 21:00:38

Thanks spotty i really hope so im soooo tired still quite sore wound and boobs and so worried about everything really between my ds getting treated as i want to ie pre ellie and bg levels not affecting my eyes and not coping when oh is back at work the list goes on lol

BonaDea Mon 08-Apr-13 22:33:50

Sorry everyone is feeling so down. Me too!

Ds's latch has gone to pot and my nipples are absolute agony! Like, seriously enough to make me claw out my own eyes sore! There have been tears in the Bona household tonight as DS screamed to be fed and I hid upstairs crying as I couldn't face letting him loose on my poor boobs. I eventually came back down to face the music but part of me just wants to run out of here tonight, check into the nearest hotel and sleep for a night with unmolested nipples confused (only partly joking!)

Bona I got like that with DD - my lovely HV told DH to go out and buy 2 cartons of ready made formula to keep in the cupboard, and a bottle to give it in. It was like a security blanket, just having it in the house meant that somehow the thought of having to feed her wasn't so bad, and if I really wanted/needed to then DH could take over and give the formula.

Best advice ever! Maybe worth a thought if you've not already done it?

And I completely forgot what I was actually going to write grin

Growth scan tomorrow morning, I feel worse physically than I did 2 weeks ago - much bigger, bump seems huge and uncomfortable, breathless, generally tired and a bit rubbish. Think I've gained a fair amount of weight too so could be fluid? Am nervous of what the scan will say (again!).

BonaDea Tue 09-Apr-13 02:52:10

Rue - not a bad tip at all! I have some ebm in the freezer and some bottles so I guess I should start thinking of those in similar terms!

What happened in the end? Tell me things improved!!

Good luck for the scan. Although I know we are b conscious of size and weight, do remember that all pregnant women begin to feel massive at this point! Remember the uncomfortable feeling all to well and have to say that I'm enjoying having my body back albeit with section scars and traumatised nipples!! You've not long to go now- and remember that the scans all lie!!

I've had formula in since ds was born its nice to know it's there smile

BFing got easier, I bc her for a year in the end smile with some use of formula or ebm as worked for us. Took about 3 months before I felt completely ok with it though.

Ds has had a few bottles of ebm in his life, not many though. He had one when I went out Sunday but only drank 60ml he seemed happy with that though. Dp said he took forever to drink it! Now he's over four months I'm thinking of introducing a cup, more for him to play with at this stage, then even if he won't take a bottle hopefully he will use his cup smile

dieciocho Tue 09-Apr-13 07:58:34

Good luck rue!

We did the same with two cartons of formula - last week we gave it to someone we know who's just had tiny twins and won't be bf-ing...so the safety net has now gone (there's breastmilk in the freezer.)
That's a positive step and it only took 12 weeks (only?)

bona I nearly ran away in...week 4 I think it was. My sister came to visit and I took one look at her and burst into tears and refused to let go of her. I didn't want her to leave, or I wanted her to take me with her in her car!
In week 6 I did run away to my M&D's, but I took the baby with me and the change of scene did me good.

hoping stop worrying about the things that aren't happening right now. Don't think abut next week/month/year and all that crap. You will be no use to anyone if you get yourself into a state. Think about your own well-being too - you matter.
Maybe you could set yourself a little target for each day? I did it for practical stuff that I was finding hard - like, Monday = success because I put on the washing machine, Tuesday = success because I cooked a meal, Wednesday = success because I made a GP appointment... etc.
Yours could be about doing x with DS or spending x amount of time with Ellie and not feeling bad about it.

Is the baby here yet puds wink?

Hopingforno2 Tue 09-Apr-13 10:47:25

Thanks ladies i just cant pull myself out of feeling like i made a mistake and shouldnt have had another baby, i dont feel like i can admit to that in rl the feeling that i could happily let sum1 take her away and i wouldnt care. I dont want my baby blush i could do easily run away with ds to well anywhere and be happier god whats wrong with me!

Hoping you need to tell someone or it will eat you up. Fwiw I think it's a pretty normal feeling I felt the same only wanted to run away with ds and leave dd blush

Well it's same old same old mostly this morning - still above top of centile chart for stomach, but following his own line rather than showing any exponential growth, so that's not horrendous at any rate. Consultant next week, next scan in a fortnight.

dieciocho Tue 09-Apr-13 11:03:57

hoping I admit I don't know much about it, but could it be PND?
Has the community mw visited you yet? Mention it.
You're not a bad person, these feelings came out of nowhere and you can't control them. The brain is a strange thing.

Hopingforno2 Tue 09-Apr-13 11:43:40

spotty il myb speak to my sister as she is recovering from pnd a fairly bad case actually so while i feel she knows how im feeling im scared og setting her back.

Hopingforno2 Tue 09-Apr-13 11:50:48

diec i had it somewhat with ds tho it lifted quickly and i stopped taking the meds within a week as was having night terrors when i did get any sleep

Hoping I think you'd be better talking to a mw or GP. You could try different tablets or even therapy if you didn't want tablets. You need to lift the burden. Have you spoken to your dh?

Come on baby puds!

Hopingforno2 Tue 09-Apr-13 12:24:42

Community mw is coming today to look at my wound and check her so il myb say im worried about heading down the smae route as with ds only diff being i can sleep when she is kinda whereas with ds even when he wasnt in the house i couldnt sleep

BonaDea Tue 09-Apr-13 13:40:14

Defo speak to your mw - I'm sure she'll be very understanding. Remember, as well, that everyone definitely gets baby blues in the first few days / weeks, and it doesn't necessarily mean pnd. All the hormones, lack of sleep, worry is enough to send anyone over the edge!!

T has oral thrush which has now passed to my nipples (sorry - tmi?) which explains why I have been in agony again the last few days. I wondered about it but my mum and two friends with babies assured me the white spots were just milk! But Dr Google was right and the mw confirmed it today. Am actually super-relieved as it means I can get it treated then hopefully the throbbing pain will stop! Heading to the surgery later to pick up my cream and T's drops. If he was just a week or two older I think I would be expressing and bottle feeding by this point it is so sore but a bit anxious to do that yet. I listened to him girning next to me for 2 hours last night - I had fed him but only on one side and I knew he wanted more but just couldn't face the pain of it - he wasn't screaming or anything but still I feel pretty guilty!

dieciocho Tue 09-Apr-13 15:51:47

Ouch! But good job you've got a diagnosis.
I've wondered about it with V when she's been screaming, but GP told me it could only be thrush if she'd caught it from my vagina during birth, so impossible as she was a cs baby [confused} - bona can you explain, please?

Diec your GP is shocking and wrong.

Bona poor you, unfortunately 75% of bf mothers experience thrush. Advice is to keep a low sugar diet wink you can also wipe the inside of his mouth with a sterile cloth after each feed as the bacteria feeds off the milk (cut up muslin soaked in boiling water).

Diec has V got symptoms of thrush?

dieciocho Tue 09-Apr-13 18:16:06

I'm not sure - her mouth sometimes has a white layer, but that could be the milk!
It's really only something that I think about when she screams during feeds (once a day).

Hmm probably not. But not impossible like your GP said hmm

BonaDea Tue 09-Apr-13 19:11:01

Well, I had a cs delivery too so the thing about catching it during delivery is clearly rubbish! The thrush bacteria is around all our bodies the whole time and sometimes it just flares up. That's my understanding.

The patches of white stuff in his mouth are very thick. Milk looks more like a thin-ish film and will wipe off with your finger. Thrush is harder to remove and the area underneath might be raw and red. Diec - can you ask someone more clued up than your GP? How about health visitor? Or a breastfeeding drop in?

BonaDea Wed 10-Apr-13 10:12:10

Rue- good news about the scan. Hang on in there. How many weeks now?

Wonder how puds is getting on....?

Yes rue I think that sounds good as there's no dramatic change and things are staying on their lines so to speak

dieciocho Wed 10-Apr-13 16:30:08

Good news, V's hips have got the all clear! After 5 weeks of wearing double terry nappies over her babygros and sitting in the Babybjorn sling for HOURS, she's been discharged.
What a relief.

Hopingforno2 Wed 10-Apr-13 16:50:01

Thats great diec must be a relief for you

Great news diec smile

I'm 32, coming up 33 weeks now so a about a month to go. I'm pleased that he's not jumped up again, just hope it stays that way now!

Have just spent the day at Peppa Pig World with DD, DS, & DD's friend and am now completely knackered, really achy and think I overdid it generally despite not going on many rides and sitting down as much as possible. Yet to see whether I manage to sleep much tonight, am glad I stuck some paracetamol in my bag this morning!

Ooo rue we're going to go on Sunday I think. It's not too far from us (hour ish)

BonaDea Wed 10-Apr-13 20:05:08

Diec - fantastic, what a relief. I know it's hardly the point but she must have been a sight to behold in her get up wink

Peppy pig world sounds like my idea of living hell. You did well to get through that!

BonaDea Thu 11-Apr-13 04:43:49

Aaarrrggghhhh. In agony with feeding. Don't know whether thrush or latch but something is very very wrong to be this sore. To top it off DS has had a terrible last 24 hours and wants to feed all the bloody time.

I feel like such a failure at this. I am persevering but it can't seriously continue to be this hard can it? Feeding often is hard enough. Feeding often when it hurts this much is surely a test in endurance of epic proportions?!

Off to a bf'ing drop in later today. Am so hoping someone there can show me a magic trick or something.

Oh Bona sad I've heard people say their thrush got worse before it got better. Have you got nipple shields? I hope the group can help you