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please learn from my mistakes

(171 Posts)
gymboywalton Fri 15-Feb-13 11:31:36

i have been reading another thread about special outfits for newborn babies and i thoughtit it might be fun to have athread where people can share mistakes we made when ours were new.

my number one mistakes was buying clothes/babygrows that fastened up the back. wtf was i thinking? impossible to get the baby into and they end up lying on the poppers and being uncomfy.

2nd mistake was buying babygrows made out of velour-they felt all lovely on the outside but insdie are scratchy and sweaty and horrible.l
the day i found out i was pregnant i went out and bought an outfit that was both velour AND had poppers up the back.
it was worn once!!!!

ElliesWellies Fri 15-Feb-13 12:28:31

I put DS' first nappy on backwards. The tabs should be laid behind the baby and then pulled around and fastened in front, people! Haha.

Also, indoor outfits with hoods are no good for newborns, as the hood bunches up behind their neck when they are lying down, unless you keep the hood round their head, which you don't want to do indoors in case they overheat.

Meglet Fri 15-Feb-13 12:33:05

Baby clothes with fancy collars. They just suck them.

purrpurr Fri 15-Feb-13 12:36:58

The tabs should be laid behind the baby and then pulled around and fastened in front Ellies you're a blinking legend, last time I had to change a nappy it was for my SIL's PFB (my SIL absolutely loathes me, but her kid's ace) who had asked me to change her bum. Now when I was younger I was a carer dealing with young kids with learning disabilities, so I'm fairly adept at changing nappies on wriggling things. So off we toddled to a discrete location where it suddenly dawned on me that about 5 years had passed since I'd changed a nappy and I had NO idea. I put it on backwards. From my SIL's reaction you would have thought I'd boiled her kid in acid.

At least I'll be able to put the nappy on my kid the right way round smile thank you!

noblegiraffe Fri 15-Feb-13 12:43:14

Over the head babygros. If they don't have buttons all the way down the front, they're not getting worn.

People bang on about big knickers after a c-section. They should also mention nice soft trousers that don't have a tight waistbands at scar level. I couldn't wear jeans for months, and had to spend the first couple of weeks wearing the same two pairs of trousers.

Fleece blankets look cute, but it is recommended that the baby sleeps under cellular blankets as fleece might make the baby overheat. So many unusued blankets!

rainand Fri 15-Feb-13 13:18:25

Great thread!

Please continue sharing ... smile

Bluemonkeyspots Fri 15-Feb-13 13:24:53

There is nothing wrong with having your first pee (post back to back first birth of baby elephant) sitting in the bath.

You may think it's yuck or gross but after you have attempted it the normal way of just sitting on the toilet you will quickly change your mind.

Chopsypie Fri 15-Feb-13 13:28:57

Buying shoes. My first had lots of pairs of shoes, to match various outfits that i'd bought (all whilst pregnant). I think he generally wore them once. Then they fell off, were pulled off or I took them off to change his nappy.
Massive waste of money.
My second has just got her first pair at 14 months, having been walking already for 6 weeks.

Bed mats for post birth, or at least old sheets. Even with breast pads/sleepbra and pants/maternity towel I still used to wake up a soggy mess.

roofio87 Fri 15-Feb-13 13:40:15

loving this thread ladies!! thank you!! I'm 25 and expecting my first. although I consider myself pretty good with babies and kids (i am super auntie afterall) there are so many things I would never have thought of!! I spent 10 minutes the other day trying to button up my nephews baby grow and eventually gave up and had to get his mum to do it!!

NAR4 Fri 15-Feb-13 13:41:37

Cat nets for the pram or moses basket are a complete waste of money. If the cat does (unlikely though) decide to climb in the weight of them is too much for the net and they still have their full weight on the baby anyway.

If it doesn't popper up between the legs don't buy it. Even buttons instead are a nightmare especially when they get a bit bigger and start wriggling. Had a couple of lovely outfits for my first child, which I loved, until I realised I would have to completely strip him to change his nappy.

Only get a couple of really cheap breastfeeding bras to last the first few weeks. Your boobs will still change size and get bigger and then probably a bit smaller again, to start with. Be patient and wait before spending good money on really decent ones.

FairyJen Fri 15-Feb-13 13:42:28

Never assume half a pack of nappies will last more than an hour. Still make that mistake now!

Oreocrumbs Fri 15-Feb-13 13:45:11

Put a thin smear of vaseline on baby's bum when they are born before the first poo.

Trying to clean the meconium poo off with cotton wool and water is hard. Vaseline stops ift from sticking.

Of course no one told me that untill I was home with DD and we had already had the fluffy cotton wool stuck on bum situation!!

JollyRedGiant Fri 15-Feb-13 13:46:27

Vests have envelope necks so you can pull them down in order to avoid the child getting poo/sick in their hair.

Do not ever be scared to phone the doctor. The NHS is there to deal with illness, so if you are concerned about your baby's health then call them! You will not be written off as a PFB mother.

purrpurr Fri 15-Feb-13 13:49:50

Jolly, seriously, would not have thought about putting a vest down, rather than up and over the head. Legend. Thank you

MiaowTheCat Fri 15-Feb-13 13:56:44

Sock ons are amazing. Unfortunately they don't work when you've got an older baby determined to literally put a sock in it who is only happy when rolling around the floor with a sock in her gob.

Whirliwig72 Fri 15-Feb-13 13:56:52

Buy lots of cheap flannels when weaning on to food (Asda or pound land) not only do babies seem to prefer them to wipes when giving their faces a good clean they will save you ££'s. you can get through a 1/4 pack of wipes very easily when trying to clean off a very messy baby with food everywhere ESP when doing baby led weaning! smile

BalloonSlayer Fri 15-Feb-13 13:57:48

With first DC I obeyed hospital orders to only clean baby's bottom using boiled cooled water and cotton wool. I carried with this ridiculous palaver until probably the third time the baby kicked the water bowl over at 3 am, drenching himself.

With subsequent babies I took in baby wipes and prepared to just give the midwives the hmm face if they told me off. But they didn't. It was a different hospital though

Whirliwig72 Fri 15-Feb-13 14:01:27

Oh I've thought if another one smile - if you are breastfeeding and your baby gets an attack of sneezing remove your boob from his mouth sharpish if you value your nipples!! grin

Wingdingdong Fri 15-Feb-13 14:01:32

Don't get dungarees for a potty-training toddler. Obvious, you'd think, but even if they have poppers between the legs you can guarantee one of the trouser legs will get peed on.

Take a ridiculous number of pairs of knickers/maternity pads to hospital. Due to gushy waters I used a full 5 pack of knickers before I'd even had him. I also went through 5 x 10 packs of maternity pads overall before I could switch to anything else. Normal sanitary towels brought me out in a rash, which they never had before, so worth bearing in mind as you will be wearing them constantly for a good few weeks (6 1/2 in my case).

Get your DP onside to invent a reason why the 14th visitor of the day should perhaps give it a few more days. Childless friends of mine turned up en masse, as they thought it would be easier for me to get it out of the way all in one go! It was completely overwhelming and I wish I'd told them to bugger off.

Everyone will have an opinion on everything you are doing. The most important thing to learn is to smile, nod and carry on doing it your way.

NAR4 Fri 15-Feb-13 14:07:25

Jolly I am pregnant with my 5th and am ashamed to say I had never realised that you could take the vests off the other way to avoid poo and sick in babys hair. Thankyou.

Whirliwig your post had me in fits of laughter, it is so true.

Leg warmers are a great alternative to tights for little girls, when potty training. No need to remove them at all, so quicker and they soak up wee running down legs much better than tights do.

This is a great thread OP.

NotSoNervous Fri 15-Feb-13 14:11:15

Sleep suits don't buy if they don't have poppers down at least one leg. I brought 2 that stopped at the belly button and was a nightmare doing a 4am feed and change

Weissdorn Fri 15-Feb-13 14:16:44

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Whirliwig72 Fri 15-Feb-13 14:19:33

One more - sorry!! Even if your partner is the most understanding, sweetest, thoughtful person to walk the planet, there will be days in the first few weeks when you would happily push them under a bus so irksome they seem! I don't know why this is: maybe something to do with a tight bond forming between mother and baby pushing everyone else into the periphery but if it happens to you don't worry that you'll be heading for the divorce courts before your baby turns one ... It happens to everyone!

Inertia Fri 15-Feb-13 14:19:48

Don't put babies in babygrows to sleep in- trying to do poppers in the dark at middle-of-the-night-o-clock is no fun. Pjyamas are much easier.

spiderbabymum Fri 15-Feb-13 14:23:07

When out first born was about 6 weeks decided to give washable nappies a go .
collected a trial pack with various samples in from local council .

Put him in Moses basket for the night with nice soft organic washable cloth nappy . In the morning mattress was soaked thru .......didn't realise I needed to add the waterproof wrap over the nappy . whoops !

Inertia Fri 15-Feb-13 14:24:10

While you're buying the load of cheap flannels that Whirliwig mentioned, buy a load more in a different colour (still reasonably pale so you can boil wash) . When you change baby's nappy and roll their top / babygrow up, put the flannel under the baby's back. If baby then does a nappy-off wee the flannel will absorb it, and you won't need to change the vest/ outfit as well.

spiderbabymum Fri 15-Feb-13 14:27:51

Tip : ikea are great for cheap flannels

bonzo77 Fri 15-Feb-13 14:31:06

If you have a prem baby they need prem clothes. Not newborn or 0-3 months!

Weissdorn Fri 15-Feb-13 14:37:49

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Weissdorn Fri 15-Feb-13 14:38:13

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

I bought a big pack of cheap tea towels to go on the changing mat to deal with nappy free accidents the first couple of months.

I prefer pjs that have poppers up the back. Just put the baby over my knee to do it up and it burps them at the same time.

I keep my baby in vest and baby gro pretty much the whole time. Can't be faffed with proper outfits. It's frowned upon by some on here but she'll stay dressed like that pretty much all the time until she is about 9 months, like her sister. Exceptions will be when we go to restaurants or to friends' houses. You might feel the same so don't buy too many..

Eletheomel Fri 15-Feb-13 14:47:40

My mistake was pre-washing all the clothes we got as gifts for DS as soon as we got them.

Of course, once that was done we couldn't return them and exchange them for different sizes and as DS lived in sleepsuits for about 3 months we wasted loads of good clothes sized 0-3 months that we couldn't exchange :-(

So, definitely worth not doing any washing of an item until you know you're going to use it, and all shops that we took baby clothes back to exchange (once I'd learned my lesson) exchanged them happily without a receipt, so if you do get clothes gifted that you don't like, just take them back and swap them for something you do like!

rainand Fri 15-Feb-13 14:49:03

PetiteRaleuse, I'm planning to do the same re babygrows. Are pyjamas easier to get them in than babygrows?

rainand Fri 15-Feb-13 14:49:55

spiderbabymum Thanks for tip on the washcloths: http://www.ikea.com/gb/en/catalog/products/40054538/

SnowyWellies Fri 15-Feb-13 14:54:27

only thing I would recommend is to take lots of non-perishable food to the hospital.

I have birth a bit after midnight and was told no food available (I wanted tea and toast! Waaaah!) until breakfast. I was starving starving. DH left me with a packet of wine gums that I inhaled. I was also unable to walk the first few days due to bad bleeding and a transfusion, so had to wait for food to be brought to me. It took until mid-morning and I nearly tore the arm off the poor person delivering it! Then DH brought in biscuits and babybels and grapes and all sorts cava and I was happy again.

5madthings Fri 15-Feb-13 14:59:50

For babies get those baby nightgowns! John lewis sell them and mother care, so easy for night time nappy changes.

Think john lewis call them a baby bundler?

5madthings Fri 15-Feb-13 15:01:13
suzyrut Fri 15-Feb-13 15:02:01

Baby baths? You have a bath already...one that your poor weakend abdominal muscles don't need to lift when full of water. Used mine once then bought £10 terry towelling bath support from Mothercare. xx

greenhill Fri 15-Feb-13 15:23:16

A baby bath is only any good if you use it in the normal sized bath. And only if it has a plug hole, so you don't have to lift it to empty it.

Baby wipes can be warmed up by leaving them on a radiator.

I liked the baby bath for one reason... I would make DP take the moses basket off the stand and put the bath in the stand and sit it in front of the armchair.

Made things much easier in the early days when I was recovering post nightmare birth.

Great thread thank you everyone. Keep them coming!!

VeryDullNameChange Fri 15-Feb-13 16:26:50

If you do want to go with the midwife-approved cotton wool balls for changing then a bag of 100 balls may sound like quite a lot. It is not a lot. A really determined bf new-born baby can get through 100 cotton wool balls in 24 hours. Bags of 300 balls are a start, but only a start.

Oh, and one scene you never see on TV births is where you ring the hospital, say "I'm in labour!!" and a blasé midwife says "take two paracetomol, have a bath and ring back in three hours. Taking two paracetomol features much more heavily in real labour than TV labour, so have some in the house just in case.

And YY to long-life food in hospital bag - commercial flapjacks are ideal.

TinkyPeet Fri 15-Feb-13 16:29:20

Do NOT buy a lovely brand spanking new WHITE baby chair/bouncer thingy. Explosive baby + white chair = I'm sure you can imagine!!
The chair in itself was fabulous! Laid right down or sat up and had a squishy memory foam type thing in the middle for newborns. Haven't got a clue what possessed me to buy a white one!

Oh and you don't have to use cotton wool, even in the hospital. You can use these.

They have no reason to tell you not to use these, they are great and you will be happy about them for the meconium poo!

rrreow Fri 15-Feb-13 16:38:20

Don't buy babygrows or anything with really tight cuffs. Trying to get the hands of a tiny newborn through the cuffs will make you feel like you're manhandling them.

soupmaker Fri 15-Feb-13 16:39:37

You can't have enough muslins. Use for modesty if BF, wiping up bodily fluids, putting on top of changing mat to catch wee and flying poos, swaddle baby in extra big ones, use to wipe faces and hands when weaning, use extra special grubby ones as floor cloths, cut them up to put spices in when making chutney, use to buff up polished shoes....the list is endless.

MrsLyman Fri 15-Feb-13 16:41:26

If your using cotton wool then the large square pads are easier to use than balls. If you have already bought balls then unravel them so they are flat pre-use, it makes them more effective and you'll be able to use stretch a bag further than one nappy change

piprabbit Fri 15-Feb-13 16:46:20

Don't bother with those legging things with feet on. The baby just kick their legs until the leggings fall off. Ditto socks. And shoes.

Jacksterbear Fri 15-Feb-13 16:46:34

Don't buy pale-coloured nighties or pjs for after the birth as chances if maternity pad leakage are high - walk of shame across post-natal ward with bright red patch on bum = not good!

Jacksterbear Fri 15-Feb-13 16:54:43

Also, don't pack a hospital bag that's too heavy for you to carry, should you end up having to get yourself to hospital in labour in a hurry! Have a small, separate, emergency bag!

curiousgeorgie Fri 15-Feb-13 16:58:05

It is your baby and you can hold, feed and dress her!

In recovery after my c section I asked for DD and the midwife told me to wait until I could sit up. Then DH tried to take her and the same midwife picked her up to give her a bottle and we didn't say anything. and he after told me the midwife had dressed her too.

I'm sure she was just being helpful but I'm 5 months pregnant with DD2 and this time I'm putting my foot down!

MiaowTheCat Fri 15-Feb-13 17:02:25

I have to say I agree with the pyjamas Vs babygros thing... moved to PJs about 3 months last time around and it was sooo much easier - but then I've apparently spawned a beanpole of a child who grew out of babygros at a rate of knots (and I was pregnant again by then so wasn't going to cut feet out of things so I could reuse them for number2).

Don't leave the cotton wool in the reach of a greyhound obsessed with soft white fluffy things... it's not meant for cleaning the innards of a canine - eww.

Don't ever assume husbands will have a clue about little girls' clothing - asked mine to get the baby (well 10 month old) dressed the other weekend - saying to just put her in some leggings and a top... came downstairs to her wearing a T-shirt at least one size too small and a pair of tights!

adagio Fri 15-Feb-13 17:08:46

Hats come in different sizes and 0-3 months is actually rather large on a small newborn and stayed on for about 60 seconds before being wriggled off

Scratch mits are a waste of time, socks stay on much better

Strong solution of milton fluid gets poo stains out of baby clothes (well, white ones anyway)

Cheap black joggers in thin jersey fabric are ideal for post birth 'PJ's' as in reality you don't really differentiate day and night for the first couple of weeks so at least in these you can pretend you have managed to make it out of the bedroom when the PIL turn up for a visit at 3pm - ditto keeping baby in sleep suits exclusively, means no one can actually tell if you are still in overnight wear or if you are up and about!

MB34 Fri 15-Feb-13 17:17:04

When doing night time nappy changes for the first few weeks, put one end of a towel (or similar) under baby's bum and the other end, put across your lap to catch any projectile poo!

The first time my DS did this, I was sitting on a chair next to the bed and luckily my pj bottoms were baggy enough to catch the poo otherwise I would have had a lovely brown patch on my carpet!

Caitycat Fri 15-Feb-13 17:20:52

There must be some babies in the world that will wear socks/ bootees etc but mine isn't one! I have a girl so bought lots of cheap pairs of baby tights in Sainsbury's which she wears under any outfit. It means we don't spend forever picking up socks!

MooseBeTimeForCoffee Fri 15-Feb-13 17:30:45

Go steady on the newborn clothes just in case (like me) you are surprised with a 10lb 11oz baby, who goes straight into 0-3 months.

Still mourning those cute outfits I got from Next. Sigh.

Buttons are the work of the devil.

Weissdorn Fri 15-Feb-13 17:33:35

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Weissdorn Fri 15-Feb-13 17:34:31

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Inertia Fri 15-Feb-13 17:41:46

Oh , Snowywellies is spot on- don't expect the hospital to feed you, especially if you give birth after the last mealtime. Packs of cereal bars, biscuits, dried fruit etc all very useful.

elliejjtiny Fri 15-Feb-13 17:45:35

Winter babies need to wear more clothes than summer babies. Yes I know it should be obvious but January born DS3 got a bit chilly wearing just a vest, babygrow and hat.

Don't buy white or pastel clothes when you start weaning.

MB34 Fri 15-Feb-13 18:30:14

If you don't like the thought of cutting your baby's nails with a scissors, use a glass nail file.

I tried to use one of the black emery boards first off but found I was scratching his skin, then I found a glass file that I'd bought for myself a couple of years ago. I tried this on my DS, it does a good job and it's kinder on his skin.

SnowyWellies Fri 15-Feb-13 18:40:53

YY to socks instead of scratch mittens. I found that more useful.

Also- take infant formula in even if you plan to BF. First time around I had NO idea that the hospital would not supply it... I had terrible trouble feeding DC1, as trauma delayed everything and it was awful at 3 in the morning begging to be allowed some formula and being told 'it is expensive you know' and having to wait until Dh could go to the pharmacy.

And on that note... if you cannot get out of bed make sure they put the cot within arms reach. hmm

Whimpering babies and no-one coming to help is not my idea of a good time.

FoofFighter Fri 15-Feb-13 18:49:08

Don't take all the tags off all the baby clothes you buy initially. The baby might be too big and then you cannot take them back to swap them!

Kafri Fri 15-Feb-13 20:37:14

definitely NO to sleepsuuts that go over the head and only fasten at the legs.PITA to get on/off

NO NO NO to buttons. can't be bothered undoing them each time I need to change nappy

all those books that say 8-10 nappies a day - IGNORE THEM!

Cotton Wool and water. a disaster waiting to happen. tho is useful when baby has a sore bum. ds had 5 days of anti biotics and bum was red raw halfway thru.had no choice but to use cotton wool.

sleepsuits all the way. ds has lots of tummy troubles and cant imagine waistbands would be too comfortable for him. save your ££ for bigger sizes.

only take plain cheap sleep suits ti hospital. ds was kept in for a week on neo and nurses lost my fave 'I love daddy' one.

Fairlygrounded Fri 15-Feb-13 21:16:08

Don't expect to be back in your normal clothes immediately.
Don't buy many clothes for the baby - you get given a ridiculous amount of presents.
If you have a section and they tell you to shower the next morning they just want you moving about - I went for full on shampoo, conditioner etc and passed out!! Next time I'll be throwing an arm under and telling them I'm done!

curiousgeorgie Fri 15-Feb-13 21:35:39

Fairlygrounded - I did the same and fainted too!!

fairimum Fri 15-Feb-13 22:00:06

The shower after my section had a plastic chair in it! I sat down and showered.... but also felt faint!

BettyFlutterbly Fri 15-Feb-13 22:00:13

Great thread!
I have a couple, sure I will think of more.
Make sure you (or dh) know how to put carseat in the car before you have the baby so that when you come out of the hospital with your newborn you don't have to stress about it.

Don't expect to give birth and feel amazing two days later! I had a straightforward natural birth with no episiotomy but was so shocked (dunno why when I think about it) at how uncomfortable I was down below. I also didn't expect the contractions everytime I fed afterwards.

youmaycallmeSSP Fri 15-Feb-13 22:03:48

If you like the idea of reusable nappies then great but don't bother until your baby is about 3 months old or you will give up in despair. Three months onwards they are fantastic smile And don't buy any until you have done some proper research and spoken to people in RL or online who use them. You can trial different styles for £10 here.

If you feel miserable, tell your midwife, health visitor or GP. Do not attempt to tough it out.

Don't buy a pram until baby is about 3 months or you will probably end up with a monstrosity that will go on eBay as soon as the baby can sit up. Use a stretchy sling like a Caboo first and then go pram shopping when you can take the baby with you and see how easy/difficult it actually is to use.

noblegiraffe Fri 15-Feb-13 22:10:51

I fainted in the shower too, after both my sections! First one a midwife had to put me in a wheelchair and take me back to the ward, second time I was prepared and DH came in with me and got the wheelchair.
I think it's the hot steamy room coupled with tipping your head back to wash your hair plays havoc with your blood pressure.

Also, I was very thick, but folding blankets makes them into the equivalent of 2, 4, 8 blankets. We had a big blanket for the carseat and instead of letting it hang onto the floor, I folded the ends in and put them on top of the baby. He was one massive blanket and the midwives soon sorted me out.

MrsSpencerReid Fri 15-Feb-13 22:21:50

Pack a bag! And if you go in to get checked out at least take some clean pants! Do NOT go in at 35 weeks for reduced movement with only the clothes your are wearing otherwise you will be at the mercy of the midwives and various family members and your partner or poor unsuspecting other person will have to pack your hosp bag and they will pack all the wrong things! I'm packing after my 12 week scan this timesmile

Weightlessbaby Fri 15-Feb-13 22:29:43

Don't bother with babygrows/trousers etc without feet. I found socks/bootees impossible (didn't discover sock-ons till later) and found all in ones much better.

Similarly, lots of newborn outfits have integral scratch mitts on the sleeves. I either used those or wondered at DD's amazing healing powers, and still have a drawer full of unused scratch mitts upstairs!

I have also just discovered sleepsuits that zip up. Brilliant (ok maybe for an older baby) as little limbs can't escape during the night.

Purplecatti Fri 15-Feb-13 22:34:17

Don't bother with a chest of drawers with a rim on the top. Blu tak a changing mat to an ordinary chest of drawers instead. Trying to get poo, wee and talc out of the corners is fiddly plus after 12 weeks the little tinkers are so wiggly its easier changing on the floor.

recall Fri 15-Feb-13 22:35:29

Be careful what you watch when you are bonding with your newborn. i watched Toy Story 2, and broke my heart when Emily bitch threw Jessie under the bed. I then had a really weird "thing" about Jessie, I would melt if I saw pictures of her, and one day found myself gazing adoringly at a Jessie doll in Tesco. I also asked several people if they thought she looked just like my Baby confused Very strange that was.

Purplecatti Fri 15-Feb-13 22:35:43

Oh and never read a baby book that says after 12 weeks your baby will sleep longer than a couple of hours. When that turns out to be a dirty lie you will be very upset.

recall Fri 15-Feb-13 22:36:11

I think I was pumped full of Oxytocin...

JollyRedGiant Fri 15-Feb-13 22:50:30

I went a bit strange thinking that DS was the most beautiful thing on this earth. People would say "your baby is so cute" and I'd reply with "your baby has such lovely... Dungarees". It took me ages to get over this.

noblegiraffe Fri 15-Feb-13 22:56:19

I remember thinking that my DS was the best looking of all the NCT babies and the other mums must be jealous. Maybe he could be a baby model.

The photos show a very fat baby with patchy hair where his head grew too quickly for his hair to keep up. Not a pretty baby.

youmaycallmeSSP Fri 15-Feb-13 23:01:23

grin noblegiraffe I thought exactly the same about DS. A few years on it turns out that he was really cute from 6 months onwards but before then was a bit of a potato baby. Three month-old DD on the other hand is the most beautiful baby ever to grace the planet wink

Piemother Fri 15-Feb-13 23:33:22

Get a base that your car seat clicks in to especially if you have a 3 door car. I spent a lot of time swearing strapping the car seat in bending over hurting myself. With dd2 a base was top of the list for eBay - it cost £47 for a cabrio fix base but there were loads of amazing bundle listings with the seat and the base. Bloody godsend this time around buy one now!!!
Also though car sears have that big handle don't think you can whisk them around much they weigh a ton!

Investigate slings thy ate do much easier for supermarkets or anywhere you don't want a pram

Weightlessbaby Fri 15-Feb-13 23:39:16

grin DD was completely bald, and had no eyebrows until around 9 months. I said babies with hair looked weird and would hate to have to deal with it. Now DD has suddenly become ridiculously hirsute very quickly and I've had to have a rapid change of view

SnowyWellies Sat 16-Feb-13 08:14:34

Agree with purplecatti

Some idiot person told DH down the pub that babies slept through at 6 weeks. He really struggled when they .. um... didn't

Bigwuss Sat 16-Feb-13 08:25:47

If nappies leak, try a different make, as not all nappies fit the same. It may not be the way you are fitting them.
You can't have enough Muslins or wipes.
You don't have to be super mum and you can ask visitors to leave, including doting grandparents when you are tired and had enough.
Have take away menus in so you can order something easy when you are shattered. A couple of take aways won't hurt.
Enjoy it, even the hard bits as it goes by really quickly.

CollieAndTheEyeV Sat 16-Feb-13 09:01:18

If you intend to use a top cot changer then make sure you don't buy a cot with curved side edges (sleigh bed style). Or if you do, buy some Sugru because it will fix anything.

BalloonSlayer Sat 16-Feb-13 10:19:57

My sister said that when she had her DD she felt genuinely sorry for all the other Mums, particularly those with boys. She felt that they would be feeling really upset when they saw DSis's DD, because they would be jealous that they had not got a beautiful girl baby like her, but were saddled with their ugly boys instead. grin

SnowyWellies Sat 16-Feb-13 10:57:02

I felt the same BalloonSlayer! I went to my first baby group and felt i should leave early as I did not want to rub in the fact that my DS was clearly the most adorable. blush

still feel like that though. grin

SnowyWellies Sat 16-Feb-13 10:58:05

On the nappy front.... we found Morrisons own brand to be the best after trying everything.

FairyJen Sun 17-Feb-13 07:27:06

Ignore other parents! Regardless of how convincing they sound the neighbours dd did NOT say mama the day she came gone from hospital and your 3 day old pfb is not "slow" for not having uttered a word! barking that woman was

sausagesandwich34 Sun 17-Feb-13 08:08:36

Do not ignore the advice of
'Rest when your baby sleeps'

I did, thought I could be superwoman and ended up collapsing in a heap of sleep deprived drunkeness

notsoold Sun 17-Feb-13 08:08:54

Never mind about housework....when the baby goes to sleep, so should you.....

Not everybody is slight interested in sex after birth and indeed in the early years....things will improve later...your dp will not leave you ...

Let dp or dh get involved as much as he wants to...share the baby !!!

Pelvic floor exercises are to be done!!!

Leave a blanket ready for night feeds...it will take longer than you think!

BB or BF ??? I have my opinion and you will have yours...but it doesn't mean you don't love your lo....

Pack a gift bag for the older dc...will keep them amused as you settle from hospital...

Don't drinks lots of coffee and expect your lo to be able to sleep if BF....

If they don't annoy you...let parents and in laws get involved but lay down rules....they will love your baby even if they don't love you ( in general)

FairyJen Sun 17-Feb-13 08:29:33

When you do get baby down for a nap take landline off the hook ad put your mobile on silent - bitter voice of experience!

CockBollocks Sun 17-Feb-13 08:41:47

A little pair of nail scissors should always be carried in the change bag, DS suffered with constipation - when he did go he exploded!!! I cut off many baby vests as it was just far easier than trying to go up or down.

Also buy cheap vests!!!

Other mums who tell you there babies are so good, sleep all night and never cry are lying - even if they are genuinely not lying (they are) still tell yourself they are, you will feel better!!

FairyJen Sun 17-Feb-13 08:47:20

Unless cock it's a mum you really despise in which case your baby sleeps perfectly, eats perfectly never cries ect am was speaking fluent Latin by 8 months wink

I never did this oh no

CockBollocks Sun 17-Feb-13 10:08:07

See - you were lying!!!!

FairyJen Sun 17-Feb-13 10:23:11

grin yep felt great at the time tho blush

Oh yes, simply cut baby out of their vest when it is full of poo. Cheap vests.

Baby grows are the devils work. Your baby will either have a long body and normal length legs, or very long legs and a normal length body or long body and long legs. Or short legs. Whichever your baby has, babygrows won't fit.

DanniiH Sun 17-Feb-13 17:47:34

Love this topic! Why don't all sleep suits have zips?? My son did live in sleepsuits for the first few months, my next child will too I'm sure, you can get such nice ones and if they stayed clean all night you can get away with them having the same one on for part of the next day! Great tip about the vests with handkerchief necks, had no idea they were for pulling down! Will be making use of that with this next baby!

Looking forward to reading more little tips! x

DanniiH Sun 17-Feb-13 17:55:37

Ps. Cracked me up reading about people feeling sorry for other people not having attractive babies. I bet everyone thinks it! I remember feeling like I was lying to people when I said their babies were cute like it was just the right thing to say it but it felt forced! I don't think it any more, I genuinely find most other kids cute again now. May change when I have a newborn again! x

Emsyboo Sun 17-Feb-13 17:55:42

Love this thread on 2nd baby just reading everything before properly posting although learning lots I wish I'd known with DS x

Porkster Sun 17-Feb-13 17:59:03

yy to pack a bag. I have had 2 babies and packed a bag neither time. I thought it was all a bit fuss-budgety. I had lots of friends who had their bags packed and sitting in the hall at 30 weeks.

I thought I'd go for the opposite of such anal behaviour which lead to last second running around straight from a farce, with dh saying such things as 'please stop pushing and help me pack the frickin bag'!

needsadviceplease Sun 17-Feb-13 18:20:20

A good disposable nappy easily lasts 12 hours overnight. Swap brands, go up a size, whatever, but do not change a nappy at night unless it's pooey!

Do not attempt to pee post birth in the normal way on the loo! If you have any tearing / grazing down there it will sting like mad! 2 choices! Either pee in the bath and wash yourself with the shower after or use a jug of tepid water to pour over yourself as you pee on the toilet. With my 3rd child the midwife told me it would be fine, I told her it would not and I would not pee till I had a jug. With my 4th I just packed a jug in my case! Thank you sister in law for warning me before I had no 1! envythanks

Figgygal Sun 17-Feb-13 18:28:52

I didn't buy any sleepsuits was in hospital with 2 I'd had off my friend suddenly realised my mammoth mistake and sent dh to shop for a month supply.......sod cute outfits sleepsuits r the business

nickelbabe Sun 17-Feb-13 18:29:48

cotton wool for cleaning
first poos are easier to get off if you use dry cotton wool for the worst bits then finish off with water ones.

5madthings Sun 17-Feb-13 18:30:58

I agree kickarse i had a jug i used each time. My hospital had them in the bathrooms and i had one at home ready each time.

nickelbabe Sun 17-Feb-13 18:31:37

that wee thing I don't believe.
my advice on that is drink as much water as you can gandle.
byt still have a jug of warm water on standby. it's good for washing after a wee anyway.

don't even bother with bog roll- water for cleaning, baby wipes for wiping.

nickelbabe Sun 17-Feb-13 18:32:28

(I had lots of stitches from an episiotomy and tear)

5madthings Sun 17-Feb-13 18:33:55

I drank loads but even without tears ut still stings esp if you have grazes! i have had episiotomy and tears and stitches, the grazes hurt more when weeing!

nickelbabe Sun 17-Feb-13 18:35:53

best piece of advice I can give is:

wherever you spent most of your day, have a large lidded box. at the beginning of each day make sure that in the box is:
millions of nappies
wipes/cotton wool
olive oil
and a jug of water for washing.

that way whenever the baby needs completely changing, you can just get on with it. you don't need to faff around finding stuff.

I had an episiotomy with first and a tear with second can honestly say it didn't hurt either time to wee.Must have just been lucky.

I'm having third and have stocked up on the infacol this time

CharlieMumma Sun 17-Feb-13 18:49:52

Omg I never knew envelope neck vests could be pulled down and not over the head!

CollieAndTheEyeV Sun 17-Feb-13 18:53:16

Cut your baby's nails when they are asleep or feeding. Do not do it while they're awake and wiggling.

I still feel guilty sad

MarianForrester Sun 17-Feb-13 18:55:28

Sleeveless vests are a godsend for the "No, I don't think I will get dressed, thank you" determined baby.

JollyRedGiant Sun 17-Feb-13 18:59:45

I had a bloody painful graze after episiotomy and forceps and peeing hurt like crazy. I couldn't sit down for a few days either sad

Sorry this isn't a funny, but I wish someone had told me this - ignore people who gush about how amazing it is to be a mother. Sometimes it can take months for a bond to form, sometimes you need a bit of help to fix things, sometimes it didn't feel right until they're nearly one year old and THAT IS ABSOLUTELY FINE. You still love your child, you're still a good mum and you do not have to feel how other people expect you to feel.

On a lighter note... Don't bother with cuddly toys until the baby is at least one. They're just dust-collecting decisions until then!

colditz Sun 17-Feb-13 19:05:36

If you have a choice between a posh pram or a cheap basic pram and a dishwasher, buy the cheap pram and the dishwasher.

scratchandsniff Sun 17-Feb-13 19:07:49

If you buy a fabric sling make sure you get some practice on how to tie it/wear it before baby arrives. Trying to figure it out whilst man handling a screaming baby into it will send your stress levels up and if you're like me you'll chuck it on the floor (the sling smile ) and that's where it will stay.

scratchandsniff Sun 17-Feb-13 19:10:10

Oh and if you're having a winter baby and don't already have one get a tumble dryer if you can. I do soooo much more washing now.

Decisions? Decorations even! Got to love the auto fill hmm

nickelbabe Sun 17-Feb-13 19:11:47

in thatcase - jug of water because you never know grin

I had the pain when sitting down after epistiotomy and had to sit on a cushion.

Also when milk comes in boobs hurt.I found the only thing to relieve mine was the shower running over them or a warm flannel.

Getoutofmygumboot Sun 17-Feb-13 19:20:15

Don't bother with an all singing and dancing pram, you will only end up using it when you walk the dog, I nice comfy pushchair next time.

nickelbabe Sun 17-Feb-13 19:34:46

I had to sit leaning backwards with my knees bent so my swollen bits weren't leaning on anything.

Daiso Sun 17-Feb-13 20:19:36

Don't bother with the "thin" maternity pads. I did and regretted my decision immediately as I had lots of stitches and needed as much padding as I could get when sitting down so big thick maternity pads were the way forward!!
Believe the MW when she says that you may get the baby blues around day 3. I did, and because my friend didn't put a kiss on her text to me, I sat and sobbed holding DS for ages in the nursery. DH wondered what on earth was wrong! blush

nickelbabe Sun 17-Feb-13 20:47:29

I got basic sanitaryvmattresses from wilko's
sooo comfy

honey86 Sun 17-Feb-13 21:47:27

Tell people to bog off for the first day home... with ds2 i came home to 4 adults and 7 children. i broke down and went walkies in a mist of postnatal depression and got readmitted to maternity. cos of the pnd i didnt bond much with ds. when i had dd, i was on my own, mum went home and i spent time just me and baby, and a takeaway. it did wonders and me and dd have a amazing bond smile

dont even bother with reuseable nappies. too much work.

avoid teething beads. theres more chance of them breaking or choking a baby than miraculously improving teething problems. my sil put these on her dd she mite as well have given her marbles to play with. but thats my opinion.

if you drive, dont go buying pneumatic 'retro' prams. youll never fit it in the boot. even better buy a lighter stroller to keep in there.

can never have too many muzzies

dont feel you have to sterilise everything right til toddlerhood. i stopped sterilizing at 6 months and my kids rarely get sick. give them a chance to build up immunity through exposure.

and if you want to have peace and quiet, locks on the bathroom door helps wink as does an ipod when ignoring sweetie deficiency temper tantrums

honey86 Sun 17-Feb-13 21:56:48

oh yeah, avoid too many soft toys no1 buys them off u not even on ebay lol
and ditto with blankies, dd will be 4 soon and still carries her 1st blankie around with her. and sleeps with severalblush have to practically tiptoe around her with it to sling it in the wash without her noticing. cute at first, pain in the a* later wink

MorningHasBroken Sun 17-Feb-13 21:57:42

Puppy training pads... £5 for 100. Put them under the sheet and on the changing mat, far more absorbent than towels etc. also good to lie nappy-less baby on when they have bad nappy rash etc with no fear of accidents!

nickelbabe Sun 17-Feb-13 21:59:38

we use disposable nappies for the first fortnight until we were used to stuff then we switched to cloth (on a nappy by nappy change basis just in case)

magpieC Sun 17-Feb-13 22:05:26

Sunlight bleaches poo stains very nicely!

notsoold Sun 17-Feb-13 23:08:05

If your baby really wants a blankie or comfort try to make it a muslin...that way you can have spares and wash to your heart content...

SaggyOldClothCatpuss Mon 18-Feb-13 00:24:12

Have your DH well primed to bring you food if you have to stay in hospital. The first day after dd was born I hadnt filled out a menu card on the ward. Salad is not what you want to eat after giving birth, having no sleep and trying to BF.
No matter how pumped full of adrenaline, dont be tempted to stick the baby in the pram and walk 4 miles to visit MIL, 2 days after birth. You will end up hysterical! blush

Kafri Mon 18-Feb-13 01:22:13

what saggy said. I was stuck in a week and the food was horrible. First few days I ate it while dh had whatever he brought his mum made for him, then I got fed up of the crap meals and started to get him to bring me something too.

my hospital had a snack room too, with cereal, bread with butter and jam gutted no toaster - dammed fire safety rules, tea and coffee stuff. really useful tho the number of times they ran out of cups/hot water etc right when i fancied a brew was ridiculous.

halesball Mon 18-Feb-13 05:22:29

Drink plenty of orange juice and take Senna tablets. Trust me you do not want to be constipated when you have your first bowel movement. Its stressful enough. Mine was the most tentative poo i'd ever had i felt like my downstairs where giving birth again. I was that proud of it i considered naming it ha, i even told my horrified DP i'd done it (i don't even fart infront of him ha).

NaNaNatman Mon 18-Feb-13 07:46:29

You will not have enough food in your hospital bag or at your house, I don't know what I expected but for about a week after giving birth I had the appetite of an elephant.

Cotton wool and water, although a faff, for us cleaned BF poo the best.

You can easily go through 5 vests in one day, stock up on vests and baby grows for when they are tiny, mine pooped every feed!

DON'T buy the big bulky travel system, you will regret it when they outgrow the car seat, honestly you will. Save yourself the money and get a stroller/pushchair

nellyjelly Mon 18-Feb-13 08:02:29

I found long slleve vests plus leggings better than baby gros tbh.

redredwine84 Mon 18-Feb-13 09:45:06

Don't buy a baby bath! End up with water everywhere, cant hold them up in it, if they do a poo you have to empty the lot and start again! It takes moments to run a sink of water, did this with both of mine until they were a few months old.
Buy some big comfy cheap knickers for labour and afterwards, then go back and buy more and more, postpartum is messy I ended up wearing and binning most of mine after one wear.

SaggyOldClothCatpuss Mon 18-Feb-13 11:06:40

Personally I hate pushchairs, especially travel systems. I've had 2dcs, and much prefer to see them laid out in a carry cot than scrunched in a car seat. I also loathe forward facing for smallies. I like them to be able to see me and for me to see them. I'd take a 3 in one over a travel system any day! A lesson I learned fairly early on, a forward facing pushchair will need a rain cover. As you walk baby will get drenched even with the hood up and foot cover on. Rearward facing, the back of the seat takes the brunt of the weather as you walk, put the hood up and the foot cover on and baby will be lovely and dry and you won't need to worry about wrestling with the rain cover, taking it off when you go in a shop, putting it on when you go outside...

nickelbabe Mon 18-Feb-13 15:31:44

don't buy the McLaren Quest just because it's a "second" (ie replacement for the crap one that could have been lovely if it weren't so bloody useless at being folded up)
Buy the McLaren Techno XT. It might be 50quid more expensive, but it's at least £200 better

CheerfulYank Mon 18-Feb-13 16:07:34

I also had terrible pain when peeing! A squirt bottle is the way forward, or a jug as some have said.

5madthings Mon 18-Feb-13 16:21:51

Drink plenty and eat lots of fruit to help with first poo and its often helpful to use a clean sanitary towel to press/hold against your perinium as you poo. Stops your insides from feeling like they will fall out and helps to stop the 'my stitches will rip' feeling.

curiousgeorgie Mon 18-Feb-13 16:29:08

Personally I love my travel system and DD is now 2 & a half and I'm going to be using one for DD2 too when she gets here!

Being able to keep them asleep in the car seat and go into the doctors / a restaurant / shopping etc is a GODSEND!! Then the carrycot for longer days out, walks in the park, places walkable from home.

I would never have anything else, it made life so much easier.

greenhill Mon 18-Feb-13 16:41:04

I loved my Mothercare travel system. My DD still uses the carry cot as a doll's bed. The pram was very sturdy and lasted 3.5 years, so I got my baby DS into it briefly too. I had to walk everywhere and it even managed some fields. I've had three pushchairs since that have been unsatisfactory after they've been broken in by hard wear and tear!

Meringue33 Mon 18-Feb-13 17:04:25

Mothercare have sleep suits, vests and dungarees that have Velcro seams instead of poppers - all baby clothes should be like this IMO.

Invest in a lot of bibs - the little cotton bandanna type. It's a lot easier to change and wash bibs than clothes.

If you're planning to bf, don't invite visitors until bf is well established, unless you are so comfortable with them can go topless.

Don't invite visitors to stay in weeks 3 or 6 (fractious baby, cluster feeding).

make sure your car seat is reasonably light. heavy car seat & baby after giving birth is not a happy combination.

as other posters have said - make sure you have fitted the car seat at least 1/2 dozen times before you need to use itgrin the last thing you need is the car seat and baby in the car and you standing their with the instruction leaflet while it chucks it down with rain.

make sure whoever takes you to the hospital brings the right baggrin

rest as much as you can when the baby is asleep - you don't know when you might sleep again

put a coffee table or something by where you like to sit and feed. make sure this has the cordless phone, bottle of water, mobile, TV remote, baby wipes and a couple of muslin squares as well as a few snack things that you can reach for when your baby falls asleep on you and you are by yourself and the TV remote is 'just' out of reachgrin

when your baby gets older, just buy lots of identical socks, then if you lose one it doesn't matter

ditto magic mittens or gloves. I always buy at least 2 pairs that are identical

stock the fridge and freezer with easy to cook foods even if it is just sliced bread in the freezer and plenty of butter or spread in the fridge and twins of beans in the cupboard

and lastly treat yourself to some nice bubble bath or smelly soap so that when you get to have a bath or shower you no longer smell of regurgitated milk etc

nickelbabe Mon 18-Feb-13 18:42:31

oog car seat!
don't forget to sort one out before you get whisked off to gospital for post birth stutching. the drug /pain addled ramblings about how you have to leave your brand new baby with your friend who might have to feed her because you don't have a car seat can be avoided.
as can your dh picking the cheapest one from argos that was wholly unsuitable for a newborn (no matter what you interpreted by 0+ age) and the car you have so that you have to sit in the back seat holding newborn because it really does look like she's hanging upside down from it.
and then you'll end up borrowing a proper one from your sister.
save yourself the worry by buying one of those carry ones at least a month before your due date

nickelbabe Mon 18-Feb-13 18:44:41

(went in ambulance to hospital and she was strapped onto me in there. that actually had to be explained to me. post natal mummies are a bit stupid

nickelbabe Mon 18-Feb-13 18:48:38

not just when it's rainjng. we were in the picking up bay (10 mins max), I was empty of iron and really sore and swollen underneath and I could bearly stand.
it took about half an hour before we gave in and decided it just didn't work in our car. I was knackered!

nickelbabe Mon 18-Feb-13 18:48:57

that'll be barely.

nickelbabe Mon 18-Feb-13 18:51:02

ooh yes 5madthings - i'd forgotten that! hold something against your bits when you poo!

Startail Mon 18-Feb-13 19:16:19

posh dress with white collar, on a FF baby.
Not only dad she stain it the same dirty cream colour as her milk being sick, it also stayed damp and made her neck sore.

Velour baby grows on a baby that is always too hot.
Bothering to buy vests- see above
Bothering to borrow a snow suit - see above again.

Buying a large and very difficult to clean high chair.

and try and use clothes which are similar colours - otherwise you'll end up with one outfit which won't get washed ie the only red sleep suit which can't be washed with the others. hand wash is OK though as it takes 2 minutes to hand wash baby items (as long as they aren't horribly stained).

when ds2 was a baby we had to borrow Mil's car as dh has been in an accident in ours. our car seat didn't fit her car as she had a merc, and you had to use their own brand of car seat which automatically turned off the airbag when it was used in the front seat sad . what a pita. the merc garage did lend us a car seat thoughgrin

GingerDoodle Mon 18-Feb-13 20:17:13

Only two:

Onsies with feet - if you are short your baby will likely take after you and they are not going to work.

Thinking that phoning the NCT breastfeeding helpline was a good idea - they put the fear of god in to me - totally unnecessary.

honey86 Mon 18-Feb-13 20:35:15

dont assume midwives can always help with bf woes...

asked for help latching dd on on postnatal ward, experienced mw came, tried to latch baby on, wrong timing, razorlike gums clamped on my blistered nipple screamed the ward down

midwife stepped back n said 'hhmmmm..... i dunno then....' n went back to work blushangry

vamosbebe Mon 18-Feb-13 21:50:25

Leave spare stuff - nighties, pants, pads, nappies, babygros etc - on the dining table in case you're in hospital longer than you intended and you run out of stuff. Far easier to give a friend/relly your keys and ask them to pick something up without them going through drawers.
I'm talking from experience.

fathergoose Mon 18-Feb-13 21:52:49

Top and tail bowls are a total waste of money.

As are shoes/booties for a newborn. They look cute, but I have at least five pairs DD never ever wore.

Research research research the pram/stroller/travel system you're going to get. We (ok, I) bought three different ones before sticking with one (I should add that I sold each one on before buying the next...).

Don't go to mums' groups expecting to meet your next best friend. You might. Or you might just meet mums keen to discuss their babies' pooing/crying/sleeping schedules ad infinitum...

Don't pull a cord in the shower at the hospital expecting it to be the water before checking it's not the emergency cord to call a midwife.

If you're BF buy a boxset or download lots of good books: you'll be spending a lot of time sitting...

Do not pick up your baby when you're so tired you feel drunk. DH did not appreciate having to catch the both of us when I started swaying.

SaggyOldClothCatpuss Mon 18-Feb-13 21:54:45

If your LO is short and keeps losing the feet on their babygro, put socks on on the outside. Works a treat!

GroupieGirl Mon 18-Feb-13 22:27:08

Snacks for breastfeeding. I would find myself ravenous at 3am, so kept a stash of fruit & nuts (and a drink) by the bed.

Also, immedietly following birth you'll probably feel and look like shit. Pre-warn your birth partner to ignore ALL protests and take photos of you with baby anyway. Or you'll end up with none. Like me.

fathergoose Mon 18-Feb-13 23:09:31

Ooh - make sure that you notice what 'bits' are showing when you take the photos which will be circulated to everyone/used on announcements. The first ever picture of me with DD includes a lovely shot of my naked, bloody, groin, complete with catheter line... Still beautiful to my eyes, but not the one I wanted my colleagues to see!

SaggyOldClothCatpuss Mon 18-Feb-13 23:23:33

Fathergoose that happened to me! One of our pics has my blood a eared nether reasons in shot, and the midwifes arm. It looks like she is elbow deep in my fanjo! blush I wasn't too impressed when DP showed that to his dad!

Inertia Tue 19-Feb-13 08:46:29

The mistake I made with DC1 's sleeping was to think I had to be constantly watching over her while she dropped off to sleep (if she hadn't already fallen asleep on me ) . It's helpful to put babies in the cot awake if possible, so they get used to falling asleep in it.

Sometimes babies cry because they are tired - once you have established that they are not in pain / hungry / wet/ dirty / the wrong temperature, you need to figure out a way of letting them fall asleep without lots of disturbance / getting them up .

We found it helpful to put DC in a cradle by our bed for night sleeps, but in the daytime put them in the big cot in their own room for maps so they got used to sleeping in the big cot.

curiousgeorgie Tue 19-Feb-13 09:03:17

I spent every spare minute cleaning my house, washing bottles, ironing baby clothes instead of just watching DD sleep or sleeping myself because I knew people were coming to visit.

With this baby I am letting the house be messy!!

father goose there's one of me with my legs in stirrups and you can see someone stitching my fanjo. what a lovely memoryhmm

HappyGoLuckyGirl Tue 19-Feb-13 11:43:23

I love this thread grin

24 weeks with my first and although I'm not fretting, there are some really useful tips on here. Thanks thanks

my top tip would be to ignore everyone telling you that first babies are always late, and pack a hospital bag early.

<voice of bitter experience >

oh yes and to start with I didn't even realise that newborn and 0-3 months were two different sizes

DanniiH Tue 19-Feb-13 15:33:34

mrsbugsywugsy amen to that, my ds (1st child) was 10 days early and out in 6.5 hours. Luckily I was very organised and did have my bag ready. Just had to put my make up bag before we set off (never used it by the way)! x

Gimmeechocolate Tue 19-Feb-13 16:09:27

Get a car seat base so that you can click the seat in and out quickly rather than having to spend ages trying to strap car seat in each time.

Make sure you have a supply of nappies, vests, babygros, wet wipes, Muslins in your bedroom for night time and downstairs or wherever you are likely to be for most of the day.

Cook a freeze meals that can be reheated easily in the first few weeks, or stock up on takeaway menus, and get any visitors to bring you food!

Buy a dummy even if you are against using them, it might just save your sanity!

Spend as much time as possible cuddling and taking pics/ film of your newborn as they change soon quickly and you'll never get that magical few weeks back.

ThroughTheRoundWindow Tue 19-Feb-13 21:01:54

Spend time getting to know your new baby. Unbeliveably I felt guilty that I was spending so long feeding that as soon as DD was finished I felt I should let DH or random visitor cuddle her, or put her down to sleep (as we'd read that you should teach babies to sleep alone from the beginning). I barely spent any time just cuddling my new LO, and guess what? We didn't bond for a long time. I can't tell you how hard it is to not love your desperately wanted baby. I genuinely felt like a failure. I could look at my daughter and think "who on earth are you?". Didn't help when baby friends and DH were all wittering on about how much they loved their new baby.

Basically: tell everyone else to b*****r off during the first few weeks. It's your baby and you are the most important person it their life right then.

On the plus side she learned to self soothe early and even now (at 2 years) is very happy to go to bed.

PS I love her to bits now!!!

nickelbabe Wed 20-Feb-13 14:07:56

Throughtheroundwindow - you might not have bonded that early anyway - i couldn't keep hold of DD when she wasn't feeding because just being on me meant she could smell the milk and want feeding. i would have been latched on permanently if i'd tried to do that.
actually, I used to get really upset that i couldn't just cuddle her, that she would cry constantly if i held her and didn't feed her.
the only way i got any peace with that was by handing her over to other people. which, in turn, made me feel a failure because i was the only person who she always cried for.

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