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Transporting a new(ish) born to a wedding

(72 Posts)
Teapig Wed 23-Jan-13 20:49:31

This probably isn't the right place to post, but wasn't quite sure where to post. I'm a first timer due in April and am wondering if it's at all possible to get to a wedding in June.

The wedding is in Manchester and we're just outside of London but don't drive. We'd love to go and see that side of the family but thinking it might not be possible sad DH is learning to drive but it seems unlikely he'd pass by then.

So, my question is has anyone done a journey like this before with a 2ish month baby? I'm thinking it's just not possible on public transport - nowhere to change baby apart from yuky toilets, too much stuff to stransport - we'd need to take car seat so we can be driven to and from wedding, moses basket for our hotel room, nappies, steriliser I guess. The list seems endless and impossible.

Thought I'd ask in case anyone has a solution I'm overlooking. Thanks!

Dothraki Wed 23-Jan-13 21:00:14

Could you ask one of the family to pick you up - you do know they will all be bursting with excitement to see the new baby smile

Numberlock Wed 23-Jan-13 21:02:04

Borrow as much as you can from family in Manchester and get the train, it's only 2 hours.

galwaygirl Wed 23-Jan-13 21:04:47

I haven't done a train journey at that age but have done flights so was also worried about things like changing baby in public toilets but DD tended to sleep all the way. How long would the journey be?

Whatever about getting there though I couldn't imagine going to a full wedding at that stage - I was so exhausted at that point!

PPT Wed 23-Jan-13 21:06:16

not impossible-- anyone you know live in manchester? If so, could you stay with them esp. if they have all the baby gear?

What sort of buggy are you getting?- if it is one with a detachable cot attachment, I would just take that, and a travel sized nappy mat (the type that fit in your changing bag). The faff is going to be if you bottle feed, as the bottles, steriliser and formula will have to come with you- but not impossible! You can get travel sterilisers which are smaller, or do as our folks used to do, and fill a bucket with some milton and sterilise bottles overnight.

Would probably be easier if you could stay with someone though...

It can be done!

ISeeSmallPeople Wed 23-Jan-13 21:06:34

Borrow stuff from family.
If staying in a hotel, ask them for a travel cot.
You can get microwave steriliser bags, or steriliser tablets & some Tupperware, or disposable bottles.
Buy nappies/disposable bottles/milk etc if not breast feeding there. Manchester has shops!

ISeeSmallPeople Wed 23-Jan-13 21:08:16

Train loos are usually fine & have changing tables.
I'd take as little as possible. Baby, buggy, car seat & enough for journey & wedding clothes. Arrive, one pops to shops, gets supplies for weekend.

BikeRunSki Wed 23-Jan-13 21:09:23

Ask hotel for a travel cot?

rrreow Wed 23-Jan-13 21:13:30

I always found travelling with a 0-3 month old quite easy, as they tend to just sleep all the way (or be on the boob). Can you put the car seat on your pram? We had adjusters that meant the carseat could be put on instead of the carrycot. That way you have baby transport sorted in one go. We coslept so any time we went away (only once though, iirc) he'd just be in the bed with us.

If you can make it work and feel up for it then I'd definitely say go. If however you find it too daunting and it would only make you feel stressed, then it might be better not to go.

Emsyboo Wed 23-Jan-13 21:17:16

I took DS to a wedding at 6 weeks Cheshire to Newcastle no problems he was good as gold harder work now!
Trains are good London to Manc book seats and take hand wash and baby will probably sleep all the way or be fed smile
It would be better in a car if you can more comfortable but at least on a train you can feed DC whilst moving
Good luck x x

cakebar Wed 23-Jan-13 21:17:38

You can do it. Travel light. Baby can sleep in pram or hotel will have cots. (I am being a hypocrite here because I always lugged a travel cot for pfb but soon wised up. I still take my own bedding).

You can change baby in the pram or on your lap if toilets are skanky. You'll need to travel when it is quiet to do this though.

Don't take loads of spare nappies/muslins/clothes/creams/bath stuff whatever and buy what you need if something unexpected happened. I would take cartons of fomula and disposable bottles if I were ff.

KelleStar Wed 23-Jan-13 21:23:50

It is scary but organisation is your friend. Carry cot not necessary, hotel can provide travel cot... Or if you are like me co-sleep with DH on the floor/spare bed smile

Pack as light as you can. Can't remember what buggy you were having, but if it's one with a lie flat pram bit, that'll be handy.

Do any of the family have a suitable car seat that can be used for car trips? If you get a taxi, it's not necessary to have a car seat to travel about.

Family will love the baby coming and will make a big effort to help you. You may even find a willing relative to collect/return you, any responsible older teens/students willing to do it for a little cash and fuel costs?

Don't feel afraid of sticking to your routine as usual. Relatives do like to think they know best wink

What they say, easy I should think!

MirandaWest Wed 23-Jan-13 21:28:00

I know I went to a wedding in London when I was three weeks old (we lived in Leeds). Not sure how we got there but could well have been by train. I know my granny went with them as well. I think it was all quite straight forward and I mostly slept.

Missingthemincepies Wed 23-Jan-13 21:30:37

The amount of stuff you need is huge, unless you have family with similar aged child you can stay with. But you're not going alone and your DH could pull 2 big suitcases if need be. I wouldn't worry about the public transport, just practice changing on your knee/ in the buggy before you go.

What would bother me more, having had a difficult dc1, is whether you'll be up to it. Depends a bit on when your dc is born. If he/she is 2 weeks late (average gestation for first timers is 41+3) then you may be dealing with an 8-10 week old, which is v different from a 14-16 week old. At 8 weeks DS hadn't slept for more than 45 mins day or night since birth, wouldn't nap anywhere other than on me, fed almost constantly and screamed whenever he wasn't held/fed. Also screamed in a car seat for the WHOLE journey.

Now DS was a difficult baby and you may get an easy one. What I'm saying is that it will be very difficult to predict whether you feel up to it, until much closer to the time. You may have to ask to be a definite maybe. I know there is no way I'd have coped with a wedding 8weeks after DS born, I know other mums who wouldn't have blinked an eye.

Good luck, try to keep your options open!

Zipitydooda Wed 23-Jan-13 21:30:46

Travelling with the baby on the train will be fine. As people have said, the baby will hopefully be lulled to sleep in carseat or your arms for the journey. Hotels have cots, changing is very compact at this age; you could do it on your lap probably (if the toilets are that bad)

The hard part is feeling up to going to a wedding when you are 8 weeks post-partum. It's probably the peak of tiredness (or was for me) 8 weeks of feeding max every 3 hrs through the day and night, I felt very haggard and was extremely unattractive at that point! I wasn't comfortable enough with BF to not feel anxious about where/when I'd be able to do it, I hadn't worked out what to wear to feed discretely especially not to a wedding.

MarthasHarbour Wed 23-Jan-13 21:32:05

My first thought was that even if DH passes his driving test, would you all be confident driving such a distance with a new driver and a newborn? am sure DH would be careful but it is a LOT of pressure to put on him.

This journey could be the making of you as a PFB first timer wink see i was overcautious with everything and packed our car to the rafters, however my friend took her PFB to Canada when he was 3 months old! I was shock

She breastfed so it was easier not to carry all the baggage. As a hardened formula feeder my advice would be to take the pre=prepared milk cartons, get some more in boots/sainsbos/tesco etc when you get to Manchester.

you can buy small travel sterilisers for the bottles but you would need access to a microwave, so give the hotel a call and ask if they can let you use the kitchen to (a) wash the bottles and (b) use the microwave steriliser. You can then make up the bottles using the hotel room kettle.

if you are buying a travel system (y'know - the pram, car seat and buggy attachment) then i would just take the car seat attached to the chassis, that is your car seat issue sorted and as another poster said ^ just co-sleep with DC. Or ask the hotel for a travel cot.

Stuff like nappies can be bought in Manchester, just take a small pack for the journey, check out where you are staying and make sure it is near a supermarket or boots for the formula cartons and nappies. If you are staying with family then why not ask them to buy some in for you and you can pay them back?

It is all possible, and i wish you luck! I live in South Manchester/Cheshire so PM me if you want to give me specifics and i can point you in the right direction hotel/supermarket/access wise

smile good luck smile

Missingthemincepies Wed 23-Jan-13 21:33:33

Just to add that by 5 months old DS had flown to Australia and back, without any bother. But those early dark weeks are hard.

MarthasHarbour Wed 23-Jan-13 21:34:59

I went to a wedding when DS was 10 weeks old and i felt fine, it all depends upon how you feel yourself. I found a dress that was slightly big for me pre pregnancy but was dark enough to hide my bumps!

MN044 Wed 23-Jan-13 21:38:42

With 2 of you it's very very doable- I have 3 dc and didn't blink at having to do just this when dc3 was 3 weeks old. We were lucky to have a good travel system (Bugaboo & Maxi Cosi car seat) and be co sleeping anyway. You won't need half the stuff you think you do. I might even have the dress I wore if you'd like me to look, I'd be more than happy to post it to you as it's no good to me anymore (Jojo Maman Bebe black wrap dress that you can bf in). Buy a pack of nappies when you get there to save carting them, take a few babygros and a beautiful blanket to wrap the baby in- relatives were falling over themselves with delight to see little ds in a simple babygrow and white crochet blanket. Keep it as simple as you can. It seems overwhelming now but trust me, by 2 months old this stuff might not phase you at all. I go on the train all the time with my 3, for 5+ hour journeys, with noone to help. You'll cope smile

KatherinaMinola Wed 23-Jan-13 21:42:53

Yes, I did this - London to Cumbria with a 9 week old, by train. Don't bother with the Moses basket - you can co-sleep (or borrow a hotel travel cot - but I found that they don't really 'sleep' as such at that age grin )

Do you need the car seat? Will you really need a lift or is the venue walkable / bus-able? I'd take the sling, no pram, no car seat, no basket - just your wedding clothes in suit bags and an overnight bag with baby things and toiletries. As someone else said, changing is very compact at that age - tiny little bottoms!

If you can afford to go first class you'll probably get an empty carriage with lots of spare tables for changing.

Teapig Wed 23-Jan-13 21:48:01

Thanks for the advice! I'm starting to feel like it might be doable.

Trains from London to Manchester only take two hours but we're about an hour's train journey outside of London and probably about 30-40 mins to get across London to Euston - feels a bit of an epic journey but now I'm hopeful it might be possible.

Dothraki, we did think about asking family to give us a lift but it's too big an ask. They're all in Manchester and it's a four hour drive to where we live and they'd have to bring us back so 4 x 4hour trips for them.

galwaygirl, good point about how tiring the wedding might be. Fortunately the wedding reception is at a hotel that we could stay in so baby and I could make off to our room at any point.

PPT our pram has a detachable travel cot which would save us taking the pram.

Thanks for the reminders that Manchester has shops and we just buy the small stuff there. Sounds silly but I kind of completely overlooked that.

I'm hoping to BF but if not a travel sterliser might be the answer.

I wonder if we would need to take a moses basket or could just have baby in with us for the night? Is 2 months too young to have a baby in with us for the night? Sorry, tragically clueless first-timer.

munchkinmaster Wed 23-Jan-13 21:49:28

We did this in the car. Long journey much easier with a sleepy wee one than it was later on. We booked room at hotel wedding was in. I fed her in there as I felt boobs out at wedding a bit naff and also had an expressed bottle. We put baby to 'bed' in her pram at 8 and once she was asleep parked her in corner of bar. No way we'd manage this these days

wanderingalbatross Wed 23-Jan-13 21:55:18

I did a similar train journey when DD was 3mo, and it was fine. Took car seat on buggy base plus sling so DD wasn't always in car seat. Was just me so I had backpack, but with two of you you could easily have a suitcase. Didn't take much stuff for DD, mainly clothes and travel laundry wash, and I co-slept once we were there. I bought nappies while there and breastfed so no need for bottles. You can change baby at main London and Manchester stations, and keep your fingers crossed for the journey!

She did cry a little bit on the train but it was mostly fine, and I felt very proud of myself for getting us both there ok smile

It wouldn't be the easiest journey you ever make, but don't rule out going if you really want to.

ISeeSmallPeople Wed 23-Jan-13 21:59:04

I'd ask for a cot anyway. You can always co sleep. But it's trickier to ask for a cot in the middle of the night.
But if not breast feeding & having first glass or two of wine after 10 months off, put baby in travel cot or pram, not between two drunk people.

At 8-14 weeks, s/he will eat, poo & sleep. Deal with the first two & you can pop the pram in a quiet corner othe room & enjoy the night. Just remind pissed relatives NOT to wake the sleeping baby. smile

TwitchyTail Wed 23-Jan-13 21:59:11

My sister and her husband took their 3-month-old on a 12-hour flight. Apparently it was fine - and much easier than the same trip when she was 8 months old, fidgety and active.

The London to Manchester train is very fast, I've done it several times. If I had to make any journey on public transport it would be that one.

I think it's definitely do-able. Just plan carefully and leave lots of time. Can you stay at or near the venue to eliminate need for car seat? Or look into taxis that provide this? Someone will have a moses basket or equivalent you can borrow - heck I'm in South Manchester and have a spare one going!

ISeeSmallPeople Wed 23-Jan-13 22:01:45

Pre book a cab to the London station.
Same other end.
If you book train now, you should get cheap first tix for train to have more room. Get seats near the disabled seating, so if no disabled passengers you can leave the pram up there.

wanderingalbatross Wed 23-Jan-13 22:05:17

You can co-sleep from birth if you like, but make sure to look up how to do it safely. And try it out in the comfort of your own home first as you probably won't sleep well the first few times. But definitely get a hotel cot too as you might not get on with co-sleeping

KatherinaMinola Wed 23-Jan-13 22:12:36

Yes, you can co-sleep at that age - just don't drink (one glass of champagne would be OK).

I forgot to say that it was a wedding I went to too. I didn't find it tiring, although my child wasn't a sleeper. I actually relished my first chance to get dressed up, talk to some grown-ups and show off the baby - always a hit at a wedding - so I think that kept me going.

I think you will be fine. Just pack very light.

CrackleMauve Wed 23-Jan-13 22:19:13

The London to Manchester train is a Pendolino, aka the wobbly train, aka "the best baby sleep inducer in the world, ever". True fact.

It really isn't that hard to transport a baby that age. I took my 8 week old daughter on two trains to Gatwick and then a flight to Scotland all by myself. If you can stick car seat on pram that works really well. It also means on the train you can detach the car seat and use it as a sleeping place. Or carrycot would work for that bit too.

Do look at Family & Friends railcard. Although you don't need to buy a ticket for the baby, it can be worth getting a railcard and buying a reduced child ticket so you also get the discounts on your tickets. I have saved a fortune on rail travel doing that. And you have the advantage of getting that extra seat reservation so you have extra space.

You don't really need masses of stuff for that age. Couple of outfits, some nappies. Babies that age are comfiest in sleep suits and they take up no room t all. They don't really care about toys or anything so you don't need to take much of that. If you are formula feeding that adds to it. If you aren't, then luggage is a minimum. And definitely ask hotel for a travel cot, we've never needed to take one with us when we've gone away.

I would actually rather do a train journey than a car journey with a baby of that age. No getting stuck between service stations with a screaming baby in the backseat while you sob in the front. It is the best way to travel.

lightrain Wed 23-Jan-13 22:19:58

You can use the travel cot bit of the pram instead of Moses basket.

CrackleMauve Wed 23-Jan-13 22:21:22

Oh and a sling would be handy for the getting across London bit of the journey. Means one person can have baby in sling while the other manhandles the pram.

lightrain Wed 23-Jan-13 22:21:51

Oh, and just buy some Milton tablets for sterilising (if you do end up formula feeding). They are very small and you simply add to cold water and leave bottles overnight (or at least a few hours) to sterilise. No bulky steriliser or electricity needed.

Kiddicare have travel cold water sterilisers in the sale for around 4 pound iirc but you could just take a large food tub or ice cream tub (large enough to fit a couple of bottles) and some Milton tablets.
As others have said buy nappies there just take enough for travel.
The pram will be a life saver for sleeping. My niece was only 10days old at my wedding, my SiL travelled by car for 8 hours. They were very tired but it was so good to have them there. My niece spent most of they day in the pram sleeping. I did ask for a chair to be placed in a quiet room next door to the meal so my SiL could go and feed if she wanted some space and not having to go up to room so worth speaking to the bride or calling the hotel and explain the situation.

munchkinmaster Wed 23-Jan-13 22:36:28

Surely you could just dump Milton in hotel sink and wash hands etc in bath?

Teapig Wed 23-Jan-13 23:11:21

Thanks ladies!I'm feeling much more positive and quite excited about getting dressed up and showing off our LO.

From everyone's comments this is what I think I'd need to take:
Pram with cot attachment - baby can sleep in pram cot, our bed or hotel cot so need for moses basket
Sling
Changing bag with changing mat, nappies, wipes, formular if BF isn't working
Milton tablets/cold water sterilisers (thanks for the Kiidcare tip little)
Couple of changes of clothes

Not needed:
Moses basket - co sleep or use cot from pram
Towels - ok to use hotel towels
Supplies of nappies, formula etc - just take what we need for journey and buy supplies there
Car seat - we could get taxis with car seats, or we could fit the car seat on the pram and take it but then we wouldn't be able to manage the travel cot and I think that might be more useful

Is there any issue with a 2m old sleeping in a hotel cot? I thought you had to have a new mattress and sheets at that age?

Thanks so much for the advice ladies! I'm feeling much more positive that we can do this now.

Happypiglet Wed 23-Jan-13 23:32:26

Yes babies that age can sleep in hotel cots but if you are taking your pram carry cot then use that. It's more like a Moses basket and will smell 'normal' to the baby! you can take a Moses basket sheet for it if you like.
I went to a wedding with four week old DD. It was easy really.
I was BF but ready made formula is your friend if FF!
Your list sounds fine. I took DD to the wedding reception in evening in the sling and just held her during the day do.
It'll be fine.
Much harder to d o that sort of journey with older kids. I took my three then aged 5,3,1 on this sort of journey....now that was interesting!

domesticslattern Wed 23-Jan-13 23:46:57

Just wanted to echo mincepies post. It's lovely to work out the practicalities and, yes, it will be logistically possible. But see how it goes when baby comes and do not beat yourself up if you do not feel up to it when the time comes. Mincepies mentions that at that age her baby had not slept more than 45 mins since birth. It is worth stopping to reflect on that statement! You may be utterly crazy and hallucinating for lack of sleep, knocked sideways by the experience of new parenthood, recovering from a c section or stitches or mastitis or god knows what. Or you may - and we hope this!- be finding everything is going swimmingly and you are keen to get out and you find junior quite portable (yes yes to trains being better than cars for that kind of journey).
So, in a nutshell, hope to go but play it by ear nearer the time, would be my advice. Good luck!

DeathMetalMum Thu 24-Jan-13 07:09:30

I have been on the train you would be travelling on a number of times since dc1 was born (opppsite direction and one or two stops less) but it was quite an easy journey, no changes or anything.

It will most likely be the virgin run train you get. You can contact them by phone to book your tickets and they will offer easy access seats where there is space close by for pushchair storage.

Whenever we travelled with dd before she was one we took our own sheets with us. Only needed a bottom sheet anyway as we used sleeping bags but we figured this would help her settling same smells etc.

If you are worried about the cot idea in the hotel have you considered asking some family to let you buy a travel cot and send it to them. It will be usefull if you visit them again.

Good luck train travel before dc's can walk is not too bad.

HandMini Thu 24-Jan-13 08:47:16

We did a wedding when DD was three weeks old - train London to Newcastle, hotel walkable from station, co-slept in giant hotel bed. Took buggy and clip-on car seat, didn't bother with Moses/cot, took a few changes of baby clothes AND two dresses for me (a godsend as DD weed on the first one while I was doing a cackhanded nappy change in the loos).

In terms of wedding itself, I went to the wedding, took DD back to hotel for a sleep / feed / recovery, then rejoined in the evening (missed the meal / reception). I would really recommend not pushing yourself to do the whole thing if its a long day...have some time out.

I won't lie, it was a bit of a palaver and stressful, but we were so glad we'd done it / introduced DD to friends and family and for me as a new mother, the best thing was that I felt much more confident to do stuff afterwards, I just felt like, if I can do that, I could do anything and consequently got out and about a lot more. Good luck.

csmm Thu 24-Jan-13 09:59:40

Trains are the best way to travel with tinies. The toilets aren't too skanky if it's during the day and have fold-down changing tables. You can also walk up and down the train with the wee one if they're unsettled. I would take a car seat, if only so that you don't have to carry them all day at the wedding (and they can sleep uninterrupted when need be). I took my DS for an extended stay away at 2 months and tbh he slept in a drawer lined with a few sheets - at that age they really don't need much and don't know any better. And if you're BF then you don't need sterilisers, though if in doubt a bottle of Milton doesn't take up much room.

We're expecting DC2 in May and my brother's wedding is 10 days after due date. We're in Scotland and the wedding is just north of London, but I'm damned if I'm missing it if there's any way I can get there (that is, provided this one's a bit more punctual than the last) smile

Teapig Thu 24-Jan-13 10:04:24

Thanks so much for the advice handmini, it's making me realise that while it could be a challenge it's not impossible and it could actually be easier at that age than when our LO is less portable.

deathmetalmum, thanks for the tip about phoning Virgin and seats that are accessible, we'll definitely do that.

domestic, I totally hear you on the see how it goes front. It feels very odd to be thinking through these practicalities before LO is here and as a first timer I have no idea how it will be or how I'll feel by then. I think we'll plan to go but will be up front that we can't guarentee as it's impossible to plan.

The fact that we can stay where the reception is makes me think it might be doable.

Oooh, getting excited now about the idea of getting LO a little outfit for the wedding! Doubtless it will be covered in wee/poo/sick before long wink

MightBeMad Thu 24-Jan-13 10:15:24

You don't need a travel steriliser - just a sink and some Milton tablets - much lighter/more space efficient! It will totally depend on how you are feeling physically and emotionally, but I'd say don't rule it out, as long as you are doing okay post partum and baby has no significant issues it is totally possibly to do and might make you feel very heartened that you can still do these kids of things with a baby! BUT, equally, don't put unnecessary stress on yourself. If you are finding it tough or are the kind of peron who is going to get very anxious about it then give yourself a break and don't go.

Congrats on your pg btw and good luck!!

MarthasHarbour Thu 24-Jan-13 10:29:03

yeah scrap my previous advice about washing and sterilising the bottles in the hotel kitchen. i completely forgot about milton tablets <d'oh>

take a little bit of washing up liquid, wash and rinse the bottles in the bath, then stick some milton tablets in the sink. get some ready made formula so no worries about making up the feeds. and if you BF then get a decent dress that you can bf in.

we bought a beautiful suit for DS for a wedding when he was 8 weeks old - he ended up in his babygro smile

i liked handmini's post, shows how it can be done smile

I am in South Manchester too so if i can be of any assistance, as i said before, then PM me

TurkeyDino Thu 24-Jan-13 10:34:31

I did a train journey Durham to Manchester for a wedding when DS2 was a week old. And DH couldn't make it so I was on my own. I took a large Tupperware with bottles and Milton tablets and a small washing up liquid for bottles. Backpack with our stuff (dress/shoes/makeup/nappies/wipes/baby clothes.)

We borrowed a travel cot at the hotel. It wasn't too bad at all and I had 2 train changes, if you can get a direct train it will make things much easier.

You can do it! Good luck x

TurdusMerula Thu 24-Jan-13 11:44:45

We did a similar journey at a similar age, and it was fine (though not a wedding, so less luggage in terms of smart clothes!) Sounds v doable if you're all feeling well and up to it - esp with staying at reception hotel, so you can sack off to bed at 8pm if you want.
We used a borrowed travel cot as a barrier next to the bed to stop dd falling out, so I'd definitely agree you should ask for one, even if you're cosleeping.
Only thing where I'd differ with previous posters is re pram - they're such a pain on the underground, so may be worth considering taking just a sling? depends on your/dc's preferences at the time.
I'm due dc2 in April too. great time of year to have a baby smile

MarthasHarbour Thu 24-Jan-13 12:11:05

bloody 'ell turkeydino <high fiiiive>

grin

Teapig Thu 24-Jan-13 16:54:28

Hats off to you turkeydin0, that's quite a feat on your own.

Thanks for the advice on Milton tablets and using a travel cot to stop DC from falling out. It's great to know that a lot of people have done similar and it's worked out well. I won't pressure myself though.

Thanks so much for your advice martha and for the offer of assistance. I love Manchester, I'm quite envious of you living there.

havingastress Thu 24-Jan-13 16:59:57

It's totally do-able...but..I'm 11 wks pp and the thought of going to a wedding now fills me with dread!!! Nothing fits, my body has been ravaged, I'm tired and still not 'quite myself' (oh, and my amazing DD has been sleeping through the night 6hrs+ for 5 wks or so grin you might not be so lucky, so bear in mind you might be sleep deprived and exhausted to boot! )

Do you have to confirm now? Honestly, I would wait and see how you feel after the baby. Nothing is how I thought it would be!

Congrats!

havingastress Thu 24-Jan-13 17:01:14

OH and outfit for your baby? Trust me. Baby will be in a babygro and probably have a non matching bib on grin

TurkeyDino Thu 24-Jan-13 17:03:59

I feel like a show off now blush

It wasn't nearly as bad as I thought but I did tell the bride and groom that I would be confirming nearer to the time and they had back up guests who could take my place. My due date was only 3 days before the wedding but luckily DS put in an appearance a little early.

I did have to rush out and buy new dress and shoes the day before though cos I swelled up like a bloody balloon. I had total cankles in the pictures!

TurkeyDino Thu 24-Jan-13 17:06:21

And some lovely friends took DS for an hour between the day and evening and I had a wonderful snooze. Bliss grin

Christelle2207 Thu 24-Jan-13 19:28:09

If you're anywhere near heathrow or gatwick I would consider getting a flight.
No ffaff getting across London and less than 1h journey, assuming you can get picked up the other end. A friend of mine did this with a 2 mo recently and was fine. You'll find prices comparable, sometimes cheaper.

MJP1 Thu 24-Jan-13 19:42:50

great thread I am due with first in 2 1/2 weeks 11th February, or earlier I Hope so (hopefully I wont be overdue!!! Please god NO!!!) and we are going to our very good friends wedding on 22nd March so bub will be either 6 weeks if on due date or if late younger OMG just looked at the dates again and realised how little she'll be.

Anway we'll be driving from Hebden Bridge to Near Norwich and its good to hear such positive advice and comments, we desparately want to go and the bride and groom are going out of their way to accomadate us plus it'll be a great time/place for everyone to meet the baby for the first time.

i have every faith that we'll be ok and as i have been told tiny babies are easier to take as they just eat/sleep/cry.
Wish us luck will let you know how we get on xx

Teapig Fri 25-Jan-13 12:28:46

Good luck MJP1! This thread has made me feel like we can do it, sure can too.

Congrats and hope your LO arrives soon so you don't go overdue.

AmberLav Fri 25-Jan-13 13:54:03

We drove to a wedding when DS was 12 weeks old. It was our first time away from home overnight, no one could stay at the venue, and DS was combi fed.

I breast-fed behind screens while pictures were being done (the waiters learnt not to stare!) and then I sat with another breast-feeding mum later in the day. Found a lovely dress on the Babes with Babies site, which is nice enough to use while bfing, pregnancy and outside of pregnancy, which is handy as it wasn't cheap (I tried some that were like tents!).

For the couple of bottle top ups that DS had, I used the cartons of milk, and disposable sterilised bottles, so didn't have to take any sterilising stuff (no access to a microwave). The bottles were not perfect, and you sort of have to accept that you might end up throwing part of the pack away (they are only sterile for so long after opening).

DS dozed for some of the ceremony, and then was wide awake for most of the day - he eventually gave into exhaustion during the speeches, and slept in his car seat all evening, which was handy. He'd probably have done the same in a pram, but the car seat handily sat between our chairs.

We had taken the Moses basket for nighttime as we had the car, but a couple of months later we bought a travel bassinet, which folds down into a tiny bag, and is fab for travel (travel cots seem to look too big for little ones!)

Worst thing about the whole day was DH's elderly cousin in her 80s, telling me repeatedly that her daughter (now in her 40s!) slept through the night by 2 months - "surely all babies sleep through the night by the time they are 3 months?" Urge to hit her was very strong!

Smallgreenone Fri 25-Jan-13 18:18:53

I took ds to a wedding when he was 4 weeks and it was easy. Our pram had a carrycot which was useful but you could always pop him
In bed with you if you didnt want to take Moses basket. He slept through most of the service, all of the meal and all of the dancing! I'd had a c section so was a bit tired still post op and took him up to bed with me at 10 where he slept for 6 hours straight which is one of the only times he has slept that many hours! It was lovely and he was much admired and cuddled by all and I got to have a glass of champagne and a dance. I was breastfeeding so don't know about sterilising bottles etc but you could use those ready made cartons perhaps?

havingastress Sat 26-Jan-13 11:00:57

i have every faith that we'll be ok and as i have been told tiny babies are easier to take as they just eat/sleep/cry

grin LOL. You'll find out wink

Actually, to be fair, she probably will be fine...just no one can predict how you will be! At 6 weeks post partum, I still was numb from the epidural, had problems with bowel control, in pain still from the episiotomy...going to a wedding would have been my idea of HELL!!!! But hopefully you'll make it look like the adverts grin GOOD LUCK!

fraktion Sat 26-Jan-13 11:11:30

I would have done it but I was lucky and a paid up member of the BF/cosleep/sling club. If the situation arose I'd do it again with the caveat that we might pull out.

BikeRunSki Sun 27-Jan-13 06:56:29

For feeding, SMA now make bottles of ready made formula that you can screw a teat straight on to. So some of them a couple of teats and cold water sterilising tablets could work.

HalleLouja Sun 27-Jan-13 09:38:34

I would buy a sling like a close carrier. Super comfy and brilliant for the train journey. Though I have never been able to feed in a sling lots of people do.

We went to SIL's wedding when DS was 10 weeks old. He would have been 4 weeks if he was born when he should have been.

SourSweets Sun 27-Jan-13 10:33:36

We have a similar situation, I am due in August and at the start of October have to travel from London to Tennessee (!) for brother-in-laws wedding. Lots of people have said when baby is younger it's easier to travel as they sleep more. We will have to ask for a cot at the hotel. All taxi's and car hire companies will provide car seats (according to husband who works in concierge). Changing in gross toilets not ideal but they will do. (We will have to do it a plane toilet) Our thoughts were that a wedding only happens once (hopefully) for that couple, and it's a great opportunity for further afield friends and family to meet your new baby. A couple of hours on the train isn't so bad and I think it would be worth it. Congratulations on your pregnancy and good luck!

Jayne266 Sun 27-Jan-13 17:10:26

I did this recently the biggest help for me was cold sterilising bags (if formula fed) and I got a travel Moses basket (folds away) the biggest issue for me was the pram when folded but I just parked it all under my table.

Teapig Sun 27-Jan-13 17:43:19

Thanks for the advice!

soursweets, congrats on your pregnancy. If you can get to Tennessee then I have no excuse not to get to Manchester!

These practical tips are great and make me feel more prepared and aware of the challenges and solutions.

Teapig Sun 27-Jan-13 18:18:50

Ooh, forgot to ask: Can you use a second hand mattress and sheets for moses basket and cot if they've been washed? My sister has given us hers but I've read that it's best to buy new. Should I get new even though the hand-me-downs are in great condition? It seems a shame not to use them as they're free and in good condition but safety is our priority of course.

Teapig Sun 27-Jan-13 19:05:23

Sorry, that was a bit off topic. I meant to post the above on a different thread!

TwitchyTail Sun 27-Jan-13 19:26:08

Second hand sheets and blankets are no problem if they've been washed. Mattress - the FSIDs guidelines are new mattress for every baby, so if you are following these to the letter you should (they're cheap - I got a good one from Boots for £7 or so). Some people say that if the mattress has a washable PVC cover with no cracks or damage you can re-use it, but it depends how risk averse you are!

Teapig Sun 27-Jan-13 21:24:27

Thanks twitchytail. I think I'll use the sheets (washed of course) but get a new mattress. I don't want to take any risks. Will definitely check out Boots.

TwitchyTail Sun 27-Jan-13 21:32:11

Yeah, I realised the "washed" comment was a bit redundant after I typed it, who wouldn't wash old sheets grin <pregnancy brain>

This is the mattress we got - on offer at the moment and really good quality: www.boots.com/en/Rochingham-Visivent-Foam-Mattress-for-moses-basket-74x28x3-8cm_1018/

Teapig Mon 28-Jan-13 07:45:29

Thanks twitchy!

VinegarDrinker Mon 28-Jan-13 07:55:34

I definitely prefer the train to a car with a baby (and/or toddler). My DS screamed like he was being murdered when put in a car seat! Once travelled for 3.5 hours with him screaming the whole way (at 6 weeks old).

Whereas train you can feed them, change them, put them in a sling, walk around, swap between you and DH etc. Intercity trains have perfectly fine changing, or just use your knee (in the toilet cubicle!). Newborns are very portable.

We did a 7 hour train trip to and from a week's holiday with DS1. Not even especially stressful, he slept or fed the whole journey.

DC2 is due early July and we have a holiday planned again 7 hr train journey away at the end of Aug, then wedding to go to a 5 hour train trip away when s/he will be 7-8 weeks. I'm expecting the newborn to be no trouble at all, the 2 yr old is a different matter!

WafflesandWhippedCream Mon 28-Jan-13 08:40:25

I'm sure you will be fine.

Public transport is actually easier with a baby I would say, especially if they are breastfed, as you can just sit there comfortably and feed them, whereas if you were in a car you would have to stop.

We flew to a wedding when DD2 was just a few weeks old. I was a bit nervous actually, because I had to be a bridesmaid too, but in fact it was fine!

The journey was fine, only problem really is changing trains etc if you have lots of luggage, but people are generally willing to help you. I find train journeys great for putting babies to sleep, and then you can relax, no worrying about reading maps or getting stuck in traffic! My DD has a tradition of always producing an explosive nappy whenever we go on a plane or train - make sure you have enough changes of clothes (a change for yourself as well might be welcome - DD's nappy leaked all over me when I had her in the sling, just before we boarded the plane!) and that they are easy to take on and off.

We got to the church early so I could feed DD before everything started, then she just slept in her pram with DH at the back of the church while I was carrying flowers and looking decorative grin, then when we got to the reception I took her up to the hotel room and fed her again, then she was asleep for most of the meal, and I took her off into a side room and fed her again during the speeches. As she was my second, I was more aware of how often newborns need to feed, and I managed to pre-empt her a bit, so she never screamed.

She had a cuddle with the bride, then threw up over DH about 20 seconds after she had been handed back. That was a close one!

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