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Been advised to prepare for poss premature birth... Any tips?

(169 Posts)
10storeylovesong Wed 16-Jan-13 10:28:52

Hi, I'm currently 24 weeks and due to various issues have been advised that I'm at high risk of going into premature labour. I've been put on bed rest and going for steroid injections tomorrow, but just wondering if there's any advice anyone can give me?

I've bought a few bits for the baby - I have a Moses basket and a starter set with bottles and a steriliser. Not even started with the nursery or anything yet. I'm going to get a hospital bag together but wondering what other essentials I should get just in case?


FairyJen Wed 16-Jan-13 10:34:04

Sorry to hear that 10 get some prem baby grows and vests if you can my dp really struggled to find these when ds was prem and also some very small nappies. The newborn ones were too big for ds so kept leaking etc.

Maybe prepare for a section as well? Not sure of your circumstances but I ended up with an emcs and had nothing practical like a nighty at all.

Start saving change etc for parking. Our ds was in nicu and scbu for a week so needed lots.

Hand holding if you need it but most importantly try I relax as stress is not helpful. < bitter voice of experience >

10storeylovesong Wed 16-Jan-13 10:39:46

Thanks - dh and I are at a bit of loggerheads about it. I feel that being as prepared as poss will help my stress levels as I am a control freak but he's in a bit of denial and thinks we should just carry on and hope it doesn't happen and deal with it as and when it does.

I'll def look into the tiny baby grows and nappies - nothing to lose by getting them in. And the change suggestion is a great one - it's already costing us a fortune being in and out! And being prepared for a section - was never part of my plans but as long as baby gets here healthily I don't mind how!

How's your ds now?

No experience of a prem but ds2 was in scbu for a few days.

A nice blanket for the baby... I got all irrational asd and hormonal that all the other babies had nice blankets and poor ds2 only had a hospital one so when I was discharged I bought him the softest blanket I could find.... Not that he needed I ft under lights and incubator but it made me feel more like he had something of his own iyswim?

Find out the scbu policy on expressing, mine was great and supplied everything going but some aren't so you might need to buy as decent pump and freezer bags/containers

Buy a few books. Once the initial panic dies down theres a lot of sitting around while baby sleeps 23.5 hours per day.

Have healthy snacks packed, the ward called me when food was served but I couldn't take ot into scbu and was often feeding/expressing/talking to consultants and couldn't leave to eat. They didn't mind me having snacks in scbu though (and the wonderful nurses made me gallons of tea)

Good luck with the birth, hope baby stays put for as while!

munchkinmaster Wed 16-Jan-13 10:48:53

Try not to get to stressed about being organised. If baby comes and is in scbu you can send people out, Internet shop, go out yourself for a break. At the moment concentrate on your health and taking the bed rest.

harrygracejessica Wed 16-Jan-13 10:49:21

Our scbu unit had a form you took to the car park people to get a weeks permit alot cheaper.

Can you knit? If you can why don't you get a prem hat pattern and knot some hats or cardis?

Pampers do a prem baby nappy which was super.

FairyJen Wed 16-Jan-13 10:50:01

He is fine now thanks. Do you know if your having a boy or girl? If being prepared keeps you calm then go for it! smile

Ds3 was 4lb born, tesco have clothes up to 5lb that are good. For smaller things it's a good idea to look on line, also little hats and cardigans if you know anyone who knits although the hospital I was at did provide things until we could buy some. The hospital sold the micro nappies but they were expensive so it's a good idea to check out local super markets. Not all sell them.

Make sure you pack enough things for you. I was in for 3 weeks.

FairyJen Wed 16-Jan-13 10:52:03

Yes check hospital policy where ds was born we had to pay for parking but when he wa moved to a different hospital they gave us a parking pass so it's worth checking that maybe.

10storeylovesong Wed 16-Jan-13 10:56:03

Having a troublesome little boy! Even the nurses and midwifes keep joking he's going to be a handful when he arrives!

I'm lay up in bed looking at all this - dh won't let me get up and after lots of Internet searching keeps announcing I need 'pelvic rest'! I'm very much a list person though so he's said if I do lists he will pick the stuff up - just doesn't want to do it yet.

Blankets have been added to my list!

I'm not crafty at all - I really wanted to crochet a blanket for him as dh gran left me all her crochet stuff when she passed and I thought it would be a nice link, I'm absolutely useless. Might give it another go.,

FairyJen Wed 16-Jan-13 10:59:04

If you like pm me your address. I have a 7 pack of mamas and papas vests for a boy which are brand new ( by the time we got them- they were a gift ds was too big). They are suitable up to 5lbs but weight doesn't always count as ds was 4lbs but quite long iyswim. They are just sitting in the packet in a drawer. < lazy > if you would like them I'm happy to send them to you. smile

I'm currently knitting hats for my local hospital SCBU. PM me your address and I'll pop one in the post to you.

FairyJen Wed 16-Jan-13 11:00:06

And while your in bed I found chocolate helped pass the time! wink

I was at risk this time but I'm 36 weeks today so have managed to go further this time than the others luckily! I'm going to have to think about repacking my bag soon.

Another thing to be aware of is sometimes with prem babies the placenta doesn't want to come away on it's on. With ds2 it was removed in theatre but it's a quick op usually done with a spinal injection.

Ninjacat Wed 16-Jan-13 11:05:21

I had my prem labour stopped last week (at 33weeks so quite a bit ahead of you).
I was told that if they couldn't stop the contractions I would be transferred to a hospital that had a bed for me and a nicu bed for baby.
I think if there was any likelyhood of you not being in your local area then being well prepared is no bad thing.
Prem vests and nappies for baby are probably a good idea and maybe if you have a baby blanket sleep with it at night so that it smells of you.
I found the hospital really hot at times and was greatful for vests and light bottoms. Slippers as well because you don't want to walk barefoot to the loo.
Also a well stocked wash bag, flannel and towel - nothing worse than not being able to wash your teeth or hair when you feel yuck.
Phone and charger also essential.
Just put all in a bag and you know it's there ready to go if you need it. Just one less thing to worry about.

Best of luck and hopefully you can get a few more weeks in yet before baby makes their appearance.

Tiredtrout Wed 16-Jan-13 11:12:27

Hi storey, this must be very stressful for you. If being prepared helps then that is what you should do. When my nephew was born at 28 weeks my ds found knowing as much as possible about his care and being hands on helped rather than taking a step back. His own blanket that smells of you would be good along with some tiny vests and a hat or two. It might help if you could have a visit to scbu or nicu first so you can see what they do, they can be quite intimidating the first time you walk in. Don't forget a camera and lots of batteries for it in your bag. My ds found it helpful to document everything and I did the same for my dd when she was in picu. Sending strong baby thoughts

Absy Wed 16-Jan-13 11:14:24

This is second hand experience, so feel free to ignore. A friend of mine was warned that her DS might be prem, but he still arrived earlier than expected (he's fine now and getting HUGE).

When he arrived they hadn't finished buying everything and packing everything, so make sure you have all that sorted out (her husband ended up running to the hospital at one point with an exercise ball, thinking it might help out). He was in SCBU for a number of weeks, and she says what helped keep her sane was watching movies on an iPad, so if you have one (or an alternate) transfer TV shows etc., movies on to one, or if you have a kindle maybe download a bunch of books to keep you entertained. See if you can also make a bunch of frozen meals so you don't need to worry about that, and get as much housework/laundry etc. out of the way so you don't need to worry about clean towels, clean sheets or clothes.

morecakerequired Wed 16-Jan-13 11:14:57

Definitely check out what the SCBU/NNICU policies are at your local hospital - in ours everything was provided from nappies to clothes. You could take in your own stuff but you didn't need to. I took in my own clothes most of the time, but my DTs were very sick for the first few weeks and go through so many changes of clothes in a day they'd often end up in hospital stuff by the end of the day. Whatever you take in whether it be clothes, blankets, nappies, whatever - LABEL, LABEL, LABEL! Buy a Sharpie and use it otherwise you might just find your lovely clothes and blankets have been put in the hospital washing buckets and you'll never see them again.

As far as blankets and hats go we were told that wool was best as cotton just wasn't warm enough. I had knitted cashmere blankets for my DTs anyway so took them in (and the different colours helped the nurses to remember which one was which!) but the hospital also had good stocks of hand-knit blankets and hats donated by lovely ladies locally. It seems lots of people knit regularly for the unit and donate things.

If you are buying clothes then Boots and Mothercare do the best ranges of tiny baby clothes. They are definitely the smallest. (make sure you go for preemie/early baby - NOT tiny baby which will be too big) I found Tesco early baby too big for my girls - they didn't get into them until they were close to 6lbs which was well after they had left the hospital.

If you can - ask for a tour of the NNU and have someone explain to you how it all works - the different rooms (ICU/HDU/SCBU) and what the visiting policies are. If you are someone who likes to be organised it'll be easier to take all that in now than when you have a tiny baby to think about. It can also be a shock going into the unit for the first time so having a nice reassuring nurse and some smiling parents to see before you encounter it properly might help. We weren't offered a tour, but apparently we should have been and I really wish we had - I would definitely have taken it)

For nappies - our hospital provided tiny nappies but they were horrible hard, rough things and my girls kept leaking out of them - Pampers Prem nappies were far better. Not always easy to find (our Tesco sold them, but Morrisons and Boots didn't)

Buy a book, or if you're crafty start knitting/crocheting - you'll have a lot of sitting around to do. Make sure you have your camera battery charged up - you'll want to take lots of pics and some hospitals don't let you use your phone camera.

Most of all DON'T PANIC! I was fortunate and my girls got to 35weeks which was great for twins, but they lost a lot of weight in the first 5 days (25% of their birth weight) and so at their smallest were only 3.5lbs. Looking back it probably was quite scary, but if your baby needs the NNU rest assured that he is in the best place possible and he will be taken such good care of.

If I think of anything else I'll post again later.

NewYearNewBoo Wed 16-Jan-13 11:15:30

I have just seen this thread, I will pop back later when I have had a think but for now I want to send you a brew and {{{{{hugs}}}}} I am also 24 weeks and you sound so calm and organised I would be a picture of panic!!

thereonthestair Wed 16-Jan-13 11:15:33

I would say

1. Try to rest and not to worry. My Ds came on 2 hours notice at 29 weeks. Suffice to say we had nothing. I bought it all 5 weeks later - without difficulty. Yes it is nice to have something prepared but there is no need. I went into hospital with keys, money and a phone!

I assume your hospital has a level one unit who can take 24 -28 weekers? If not might you be transferred. Find out ask questions

2. Do you have other children? I assume not but if so get contact/pick ups etc sorted for the forseeable in case your DH can't get there.

3. What's the policy on seeing scbu/nicu. It does help to know what to expect. have you been offered the chance to talk to a neonatologist about what a prem baby means (ventilation/cpap infecttions etc)

4. Do find out the hospitals parking policy. Also policy on visitors in nicu and scbu so you dh can tell visitors.

5. Make sure you have a camera charged and a phone charged. It does help to have loads of photos later and be able to talk or not if you do go into labour. It may also help to get one friend/relative lined up to tell other people if and when the time comes as you may prefer that you didn't have to tell everyone what was goign on each time

6. Try and get a decent shop in the house, get your dh to get food and snacks, as well as stock up on washing powder etc

7. Get some sweets/choclate snacks etc. If you end up expressing you'll need the calories and hospital food is rubbish for this (partly because you can't get it at the right time.

Good luck. I hoep your baby stays put and fingers crossed.

FairyJen Wed 16-Jan-13 11:18:23

I should say at the scbu ( second hospital ) ds was given his own hat and matching blanket which we were allowed to keep. They had also take. Photos of him that we're waiting for me in my room. They were fab and the pictures really helped particularly in the night when I could hear other babies and mine was several floors away!

Ashoething Wed 16-Jan-13 11:19:22

At 24 weeks I wouldnt bother buying anything as if your dcs survives then he will still be in hospital for a long time. Just concentrate on yourself at the moment. Lots of rest and try and minimise stress. All the best.

FairyJen Wed 16-Jan-13 11:21:05

ashoe not that helpful

babamummy Wed 16-Jan-13 11:22:18

I wouldn't get too much perm stuff yet. DS1 wasn't prem but had to be in hospital for his first 4 months. The hospital provided nappies right up until the week or two before he came home when care became much more parent led. I'd agree that getting a nice blanket or two makes you feel nicer than relying on hospital supplies. I had a couple of soft toys in my son's cot- not so important to him but somehow made me feel like I was caring for him(but for a prem it may be important that toy can be machine washed). Can you ask one of the midwives about the nnu? Might be worth asking what the hospital provides for the babies in nnu and also what provisions there are for expressing. There's lots of great info on the Bliss website.

Ashoething Wed 16-Jan-13 11:26:29

Sorry perhaps I sounded too harsh? but I have had a few prem labours and I lost a ds at 24 weeks so sadly it does happen and I think the op should be prepared for that. Good luck op-I hope your wee boy will hang on in there.

FairyJen Wed 16-Jan-13 11:30:09

Sorry for your loss ashoe

babamummy Wed 16-Jan-13 11:33:26

If your baby does need to be transferred to another NNU (not all hospitals have intensive care/ high dependency in their unit) then it would be worth finding out if there is a Ronald McDonald house. This is a charity which provides accommodation close to hospital for parents of children who are far away from home.

HDee Wed 16-Jan-13 11:38:00

Agree with ashoe, tbh. Pack your own bag, concentrate on what you will need for a five+ days stay in hospital, and let NICU provide for the baby. My twins were born at 23 weeks and didnt wear clothes for ages, probably about two to three months, as the nurses need easy access to arms, legs and chest.

Have you had a look around NICU so you know what to expect? It's bright, noisy and unsettling at first but you soon learn to ignore everything.

Fingers crossed your baby holds on for at least a few more weeks. Having a very premature baby is hard, but if it happens, you will get through it. Take advantage if your unit offers a counselling service too. I wish I had. I still cant look at hospital pictures, or drive past the hospital without feeling sick.

HDee Wed 16-Jan-13 11:39:55

The good news is that at 24 weeks, the hospital my twins were in (Portsmouth) said they had a 70% survival rate, and that rises daily.

If you'd like to read the blog I kept while my twins were young, here is the link www.twinsjoeandharry.blogspot.com.

TaffyandTeenyTaffy Wed 16-Jan-13 11:41:30

I would say get a drawer/box together at home and put things in it that you might need brought into hospital eg knickers/nightwear/comfy clothing/toiletries/books etc. And maybe have a couple of bags packed.

I was in and out a lot at short notice before DS was born and this was really useful in telling hubby to look in just one place rather than him hunting out things from all over the place (he was pretty stressed too!) I had a bag in the car for about 5 weeks before and one at home all ready to go.

Freezer full of ready meals and lots of quick snacks to ensure that DH ate when he got in from the hospital after a day in work.

For baby - clothing wise the hospital had loads of lovely stuff and so there was no pressure to get anything in a hurry - in the early days in SCBU DS only had a nappy, which they provided. Family and friends will be only too glad to do a supermarket/mothercare run when baby arrives as they feel very helpless.

Second the advice of having a tour of the unit and meeting the staff. I was given a tour the day DS was born but it had really not sunk in that he was going to be going there straight away at birth, but I was glad to have done this.

Good luck - hope baby stays put a little longer for you xx

fuzzyllamafunnyllama Wed 16-Jan-13 11:49:06

get every bit of info you need and go and visit the scbu if at all possible. find of exactly what the deal is and ask every question that pops in to your head - write a list and go to see your mw.
I had same at 26 wks and they told me to be prepared to have ds2 at 28wks, had steroid injections for his lungs and weeks of bed rest. I got my head very mushed over it...try not to do the same.
fwiw he's a very fit and healthy 9yo now and was born only a couple of weeks early weighing 7lb.

Doraemon Wed 16-Jan-13 11:49:15

Hoping your little one stays in as long as possible.
DS1 was born unexpectedly at 32 weeks - my BIL (lives overseas) sent us a big supermarket delivery with lots of really quick easy meals (fresh pasta and sauce, quality ready meals etc) which was an absolute godsend, as I was discharged the day after my son was born and had to go to and fro from the hospital every day. Perhaps you could ask a friend or family member to be ready to do something similar for you?
I found knitting in SCBU a good way to pass the time and also helped me feel I was at least doing something for my baby while sitting by the incubator, so a crocheted blanket might be a good project to start.
A notebook and pen were really useful, I was keeping a diary anyway but it also meant I could keep a note of what routine DS1 was on (every time I felt like I'd got my head round what time feeding/nappies/expressing etc happened it would change....). It also helps to write down any questions you have for the doctors.
If you are planning on breastfeeding then I would suggest contacting an NCT or La Leche counsellor now, and explaining the situation then if you need extra support when the baby arrives you will already have a contact in place, and they would be able to advise about breastpumps etc.
I really liked this book, partly because it explained things clearly but mainly because it has such lovely pictures of tiny prem babies, with wires and tubes and everything, but still looking like beautiful, much loved babies, I remember finding that a big comfort. www.amazon.co.uk/Your-Premature-Baby-0-5-Years/dp/0711216142
good luck to you all

Peanutbutterfingers Wed 16-Jan-13 13:09:37

Your local nct may have a tiny baby clothes pack they can 'rent' you, they hardly get worn so a good way to do it x

10storeylovesong Wed 16-Jan-13 13:28:05

Thank you so much for all the replies and really useful advice. I've got a midwife apt booked for the day before my next scan so going to get any questions written down beforehand. I'm aware that this is all a precaution and it may not happen, but its good to be prepared.

ashoe so sorry to hear about your loss. I know that the odds aren't fantastic at the minute and the doctor who discharged me at 22 weeks after I'd spent a night in the labour ward kindly announced in front of a ward full of new mums and their baby's "of course there's a good chance baby will die" so I know all the risks. I spent 2 weeks feeling sorry for myself then figured that's not going to help anyone. Now that I'm 24 weeks I feel that the hospital are taking it more seriously and are prepared to fight to help me and baby.

What will happen will happen right??

FairyJen Wed 16-Jan-13 13:30:58

Absolutely 10 keep positive and relaxed would be best thing you can do. If you would like the vests, just in case pm me and will pop them in post.

10storeylovesong Wed 16-Jan-13 13:33:41

Oh and thanks as well for the good stories about babies doing well now - it really really helps to hear them.

ashiramartin Wed 16-Jan-13 13:52:10

I think that ashoething has given very sensible advice Just take care of yourself at this stage and make sure baby stays in as long as possible. My dd was born at 29 weeks and she wore no cloths except nappies which hospital provided for another four weeks. Mothercare has a lovely prem range which I hope you will not need. Good luck!

lotsofcheese Wed 16-Jan-13 14:46:55

10storey - just to wish you good luck & hope bubba can stay in as long as possible - every day counts at this stage.

I had a very premature baby, at 29 weeks, but he measured 24/5 weeks size-wise.

Personally, I would have found it upsetting to have baby stuff in the house while he was in hospital. Unfortunately, people who meant well, bought baby clothes for him & I was distraught as my baby was so small & the clothes seemed so large. You may not feel this way. But it might be an idea asking people to hold off with gifts.

I second the idea of a nice soft blanket for cuddles in scbu. Or a small incubator toy if your unit allows it.

I would also recommend a good, electric breast pump, as you will be required to express 3-4 hourly - and perhaps a change bag to carry it round in.

Our NICU provided nappies, cotton wool etc & babies only started to wear clothes at 4lb weight. Mothercare were good for prem clothes.

Crossing everything for you!

ExpatAl Wed 16-Jan-13 14:47:28

The thing I really regretted was not having a littly snuggly thing in with my ds. He had nothing of his own - just hospital equipment.
The very best of luck 10storetylovesong. This must be a very frightening time for you and your dh. Lots of us here can understand. Please do keep us updated. x

Emsyboo Wed 16-Jan-13 14:54:23

Big hugs all I can say is do what they tell you I was put on bed rest at 25 weeks they didn't think my baby would stay to 30 weeks but is now nearly at 32 weeks and I am home.
Obviously everyone is different and the above advice is great as in prem nappies and clothes and lots for you.
My advice would be stay calm keep your mind busy so you don't stress prepare for baby but stay positive smile
Good luck x x x

I agree about clothes, ds2 was dull time but in an incubator foe oxygen and under err lights so only wore clothes the first time the day he came home. A snuggly blanket to keep him warm once they let you hold him will be enough.

Also, brace yourself for the medicalised nature of it all. At one point ds2 had tubes in every limb and a tube in his nose.... And that was both icing compared to the preemie babies in the unit. It is terrifying at first but you adjust very quickly.

Dull time = full term

GingersarealwaysToms Wed 16-Jan-13 16:02:45

OP I see what Ash is trying to do. Doesn't mean to sound harsh but is trying to say to you that the most important thing is that you keep your baby. I know everyone is being very helpful about practical stuff but in fact the hospital will give you everything you need, if they have to.

Try relaxation/visualisation. Hold your baby (from the outside, obviously) and tell him that you're going to keep him inside of you for as long as possible. Keep repeating to yourself that you are the best incubator there is. Keep seeing yourself getting to many weeks further on, and having a live, healthy baby. Please let us know how you get on.

Material stuff is not important. Getting much further on your preg is. Don't mean to piss off anyone giving helpful advice.

10storeylovesong Wed 16-Jan-13 16:10:33

Hi, I knew what they were getting at and I appreciate both the positive and negative experiences. I wasn't being sarcastic or anything when I replied - sorry it came across like that. I wrote on here because I know people have a wide range of experiences. I just can't focus on the bad things iyswim, although obviously I know they're very possible.

homeaway Wed 16-Jan-13 16:21:19

I hope that your baby hangs on in the warm for some more weeks, as others have said make sure you have a bag packed for yourself. Take each day at a time . If you are planning on breastfeeding ask the midwife if the hospital rents out pumps as the hospital ones are much better than the ones you buy in boots etc.

KindleMum Wed 16-Jan-13 16:21:38

With DS, I had my first threatened miscarriage at 13 weeks. 8 bleeds and 8 hospital admissions later, he was born at 35 weeks, absolutely perfect. I'd been at high risk of miscarriage/prem delivery from 20-35 weeks and had a bag packed from then. I didn't do much other than pack the bags - one for me, which got used and restocked each time I got admitted and a separate one for baby which only got used at the end. I'd say pack a bag for you which is ready in case you're admitted for monitoring or to stop labour, don't assume you'll only be admitted for delivery. If you're admitted for monitoring, you're both scared and bored and need stuff to distract! Usual things - clothes, books, toiletries, note pad and pens are vital. Disposable wash cloths like Olay etc do are very useful. And make sure OH knows where you keep things you may need him to bring in - in my case that meant contact lenses and spare glasses.
Mothercare do lots of prem clothes - one option is to fill a shopping basket on there or similar and just leave it there so if you do have a prem delivery, DH just has to go into that and do a checkout. The hospital will have what you need until then. And DS was bigger at 35 weeks than some full term so they're not always small.
But ultimately, do what helps calm you down - if that means having a bag full of prem clothes, then do that. But think positive. DS was expected to be stillborn and he was born healthy and perfect and breathing on his own.

SophieBirkBirk Wed 16-Jan-13 16:59:23

I had a baby at 23 weeks (weak cervix& placental infection) I didn't get help due to being under 24 weeks so he was born sleeping. Have a high chance of it happening again!

Best thing to do is relax, you're having steroids which will help smile. There is a topic on mumsnet for prem babies which may help. Get someone to knit a 'baby doll' cardy fitted my baby boy perfectly!

I know that they sell small nappies online for prem babies, best of luck! X

bonzo77 Wed 16-Jan-13 17:13:44

Get a tour of the NiCU. It all looks quite scary the first time you see it, but you'll feel more comfortable with what's happening if you are prepared.

Google the charity Bliss. They have loads of advice about having a prem baby.

Get a bag packed for you with a spare phone charger, change, books etc. babies on NiCU don't really wear clothes.

Pampers micro / size 0 nappies are much softer than the boots own brand.

10storeylovesong Wed 16-Jan-13 17:23:46

sophie so sorry to hear your sad news. Are you pregnant again now?

I've just had a look for the mums net topic and lots of useful info on there so thanks for the pointer. And googling bliss now - remember seeing it on a poster and meaning to have a look but you've just reminded me.

Mama1980 Wed 16-Jan-13 17:33:54

Have sent you a pm. I had my ds 4 weeks ago at 24 weeks, and he is doing great. Have my fingers crossed for you x

Sophie sorry for your loss, I lost a little boy at 20 weeks due to a weak cervix (ic) I had a stitch placed this time at 14 weeks, which they took out last week at 35+2

NewYearNewBoo Wed 16-Jan-13 17:39:56

Oh mama hope you and your ds continue to do well, I'm currently 24 weeks and couldn't imagine meeting baby yet thanks
10storey I would echo the advice of taking care of your own needs first, you could invest in the tiny clothes and bits then end up carrying well into the late 30+ weeks. Maybe make a list of where to get items and allocate friends and family items to get when you know the weight/sex. I hope you stay pregnant for many many weeks!

SophieBirkBirk Wed 16-Jan-13 17:52:34

10 prem baby topic is useful, but scary as some tell stories about going to have more prem babies. I'm not pregnant again since I lost Riley in April I've lost two more babies both 7 weeks so waiting until march for testing. I hope your resting? :P make sure you stay positive! [Thanks]

moom they've told me about cervical stich, i get extra scans at 16&24weeks.. when I get pregnant again doesnt reassure me because of infection to yhe placenta, if youve had it before apparently its 50/50 of getting it again. It made me servely ill, at one point they thought i was going to die. Sorry to hear about the loss of your baby, happy to hear your so far gonw now! Not long and congratulations grin

SophieBirkBirk Wed 16-Jan-13 17:54:06

[Thanks]= thanks blush

Definitely get everything sorted for you and ask what the NNU provides where you are. We had to provide nappies (we found Tesco size 0 nappies were nicer than pampers) and cotton wool. You could buy some clothes from Mothercare and leave the labels on/keep the receipt. Give them to someone who will launder them quickly and get them to you if needed otherwise you can take them back. It's worth noting that some very prem babies don't wear clothes because it is too irritating for them and/or they have too many tubes in the way. If you plan to breast feed, definitely invest in a good electric pump. It doesn't have to be a double pump but some people swear by them. Also, I found that I was more leaky while expressing all the time. The only breast pads that were good enough were Tommee Tippee ones (definitely not reusable ones or cheapies) and it was an NNU nurse who suggested them (lovely nurse!).

Wishing you all the best and hoping that you can avoid the NNU!

PurpleStorm Wed 16-Jan-13 20:46:28

Agree that you should check what your NUU provides before buying anything.

The SCBU DS was in provided all nappies, nappy changing supplies, and had a stock of tiny baby clothes (although we brought in our own clothes once DS was out of the incubator and wearing them). They also had breast pumps for expressing milk in the neonatal unit, and lent me a breastpump so I could express at home until DS was discharged. So we were under no pressure to get things sorted for DS in advance.

My twins came 8 weeks prem and I had nothing, I had only given up work the day before. The SCBU provided nappies, clothes, blankets and a little toy for each of them and would have done for as long as they were in. They grow out of the tiny clothes so quickly that there was little point in buying them - the hospital were lovely though and gave us their first babygrow and the toy when we left as a reminder of how small they were. I found them the other day and showed them to my now strapping almost 18 yo boys and they were gobsmacked!

The hospital also provided whatever I needed in the way of pads and pumping kit too. When we left 3 weeks later we gave them a cash donation by way of a thankyou which made me feel that I'd returned some of the kindness that we had been shown. They are scary places, but the kindness is usually exceptional.

Unless you actively want to get stuff in then there really isn't a need.

10storeylovesong Thu 17-Jan-13 20:30:24

That's really good to know - I really need to speak to hospital and see what services they offer I think

10storeylovesong Fri 18-Jan-13 12:57:21

Just a quick update - I had a massive bleed at 4am this morning and was rushed into local hospital. They did a speculum and found fluid they suspect was my waters leaking so I was then rushed to Liverpool Women's hospital with the neo natal on stand by. The bleeding has slowed down a lot now and the last internal didn't show any obvious fluid so I'm just having loads of tests and waiting for another scan.

HDee Fri 18-Jan-13 13:05:24

Sorry to hear things are still not great for you. Did you take a look at the early days of my twins lives in my blog? It will be a good indication of what you face.

If you can make it to 26/27 weeks then many babies are only ventilated for hours then onto cpap.

Sending thoughts your way. All fingers and toes are crossed for you.

ExpatAl Fri 18-Jan-13 13:14:23

Thinking of you and your little one 10storey. Fingers and toes crossed here too.

lotsofcheese Fri 18-Jan-13 13:15:35

Just to say I'm thinking of you & hoping your baby can stay in for as long as possible.

Take care of yourself xxx

FairyJen Fri 18-Jan-13 13:38:32

Fingers and toes crossed for you 10 I did post that parcel for you as well yesterday. Really hope he hangs on in there!

brighthair Fri 18-Jan-13 13:44:37

If you want, I have a tiny hand knitted white cardigan and a matching hat (knitted for prem baby) just PM me and I can post. Just needs a wash as its been in a bag
Hope everything is ok, I was a prem baby and my friends have had babies at 26 and 34 weeks

Everything crossed for you both - I hope things settle down and you can keep him cooking for longer.

Dysgu Fri 18-Jan-13 14:01:26

Hi 10 I have had 2 preemies and am currently 26+2 with DC3 who may well decide o come early too. With both of the others we were not prepared and DP found it easy enough to buy everything as and when we noticed or were told we needed it.

I found the hardest thing, especially with DD1, was coming home to an empty house and so arranged for friends to be there with us - they were close friends who were happy to just listen to us talk about the baby we had left behind in the hospital. Also we made sure I was discharged in the day light as it felt a bit easier.

DD1 was in NICU for 23 days and for a lot of that time was able to wear nothing other than a preemie nappy. Our local Boots was the only place that sold them then but I notice that Tesco do now too. NICU was able to provide anything that we did not have and were very good at telling us what we needed to buy next!

Also be prepared that they will often have to have conversations with you where you discuss the worst scenarios - but that does not mean that that is what will be the outcome for your son.

NICU is VERY hot so make sure that you wear comfortable clothing. This will obviously be more important once you are discharged but in this weather you are likely to bundle up to get there but then will probably only want a t-shirt on once there - especially once you can do kangaroo care.

You may well feel very fragile afterwards - make sure DH/DP knows that he is your advocate and that it is his job to speak up and ask all the questions that you are not brave enough to ask. My DP always chatted more to the staff whilst I spent time with DD and he found out all the answers and got the midwives and consultants to explain everything to me once I had got my head round it. The other really important thing he did was make sure the staff knew when I was feeling extra fragile and needed extra care (we found the NICU staff to be fantastic but they are very focused on getting your baby better) and he phoned the unit every morning to make sure they knew I was coming in to do cares - otherwise they would do everything before I got in.

Also ask what happens re expressing - my unit loaned fabulous (HUGE) machines for free which helped a lot. I really struggled to make enough milk so asked GP for domperidone (lactation is a side effect) - but would not have known this was possible if not for NICU staff telling me.

And our unit gives out free parking permits if they baby is in for 2+ weeks which made a huge difference.

Sorry - I could go on - especially having done it twice and waiting to do it again. But both DDs are perfect now even though DD1 had an awful start to life. Good luck.

Dysgu Fri 18-Jan-13 14:04:30

Oh and I really recommend these people free made to order clothes for special babies
They are local to us but send care packages all over the world - they can make baby clothes to fit from 2lb with adaptations for wires and tubes. This is really important once DC can wear clothes.

Good luck with your pregnancy smile

Don't have any experience with prem babies - but agree with PP. Make a load of freezer meals, chilli, bolognese, shepards pie etc, so your freezer is stocked to the hilt with food that can be cooked very quickly, all you need to do in prepare pasta, rice etc. You'll find this a blessing at the end of the day whether you've been in the hospital all day, or stuck at home with a new baby.

Blending Fri 18-Jan-13 14:38:51

I dont have experience with prem babies but know the hospital fairly well.

Theres a free car park accross the main road is(Where the multi-coloured fences and the Caribean Centre are.) Its manned by security, and about a 2 minute walk, staff use it but its open to the public. Could be useful if DH has to pop in and out.

The Asda on Smithdown road (10 minute drive, if that) is open 24 hours. I ended up in The Womens for nearly 3 weeks after DD was born and DH could just pop out and get things for me an dd at any time.Ita a big store, he even got me a portable dvd player from there for us to watch.

Keeping everything crossed for you xx

KindleMum Fri 18-Jan-13 14:48:11

Don't give up on this. I had a massive bleed at 20 weeks - my worst of the pregnancy, a 4 inch tear in the placenta. Drugs to stop labour. Steroids for the lungs (had another dose at about 32 weeks I think).That was the worst of the various bleeds and hospital admissions (well, bar the one at 35 weeks where they finally did the EMCS) and I thought it was over. I rested, talked to the baby a lot and begged him to hang on in there, prayed. He made it in the end to 35 weeks and was perfect and is now a healthy schoolboy. I still look at him in wonder that he made it - and after the delivery the hospital staff told me they'd always thought he'd miscarry or be stillborn, but pregnancy is very unpredictable so stay positive.
Hoping for you.

KindleMum Fri 18-Jan-13 14:52:16

Oh and FWIW, I don't agree with the advice to make loads of meals and get laundry etc ready. Yes, it's useful but unless someone else is going to do it for you I wouldn't. You sound like you should be resting as much as poss. Far better to rest now than overtire yourself. If family can't help then you can always live off easy supermarket food when you need too.
When you're having a bad time, people often want to do something practical to help, nothing wrong with saying you'd rather have a casserole or a good oven meal than flowers!

ExpatAl Fri 18-Jan-13 15:18:49

OP your friends and family will be desperate to help. Ask them to find anything or cook anything you need. They will be ecstatic to have something concrete they can do. You and your dh need to concentrate on you and getting through this.
I do agree with whoever posted that the NICU is baking hot. Ask someone to dig out comfy cool cotton clothes for you. Thinking of you. x

NewYearNewBoo Fri 18-Jan-13 15:30:46

Thinking of you and baby thanks hope it stays put a lot longer. Good luck

SophieBirkBirk Fri 18-Jan-13 16:29:39

Hope you and baby are well thanks. X

10storeylovesong Sat 19-Jan-13 08:10:03

Thanks for everyone's kind words and support - it means a lot. And all the practical advice as well - so so useful.

At the moment it's not conclusive whether it's my waters or not so I'm on antibiotics to try and stop it leaking further. Baby's heartbeat is still strong but my placenta is moving away from the edge so it's only a matter of time before he stops getting the nutrients he needs. At this point they will have to intervene and get him out. There's also still a huge clot so I'm highly likely to have more big bleeds, and with each bleed I'm more likely to go into labour so have had to make decisions today with doctors about what / how much intervention I want for safety of me and baby. Very hard decisions which have broke our hearts. At the mo it's just a waiting game as they have no idea what will happen next but have said I'm very unlikely to get past 28 weeks and that I currently have a 25% chance of a healthy baby.

However every day and week makes him stronger so I've had a word and told him to stay in there a while longer yet! They're currently estimating him at 607g and their minimum viable weight at this stage is 500g so they're saying he's a good weight and had already had the steroids so stands as good a chance as any other baby at this point. Just really hope it doesn't come to that quite so early!

lotsofcheese Sat 19-Jan-13 08:38:07

Thanks for the update, 10storey. Such a worrying time for you & heartbreaking to hear the statistics. The decision-making is awful too - thankfully the Dr's took that out my hands as I wasn't in any fit state to make them.

Just to share a wee story of hope with you: my ex-720g miracle is downstairs, as high as a kite because of the snow. He's going to swimming lessons in an hour. NICU was a tough ride, there's not words to describe that experience, and the journey continued at home too. But he's 4 now & a brilliant little boy.

And you'll find the other nicu parents a great source of support too. I still see them & we have a very special bond. All our children are doing well - they were all 24-28 weekers.

Ps a lot of the statistics quoted about prem babies are based on older evidence.

So hang in there as best as you can, take it a day ( or an hour) at a time. Good luck, will be thinking of you.

10storeylovesong Sat 19-Jan-13 08:41:45

Thanks - love hearing good stories! Hope he enjoys the snow!

It's all just such a rollercoaster isn't it - I really admire all of you who have gotten through it - both the good stories and bad.

KindleMum Sat 19-Jan-13 08:54:03

I was told DS had a 90% chance of being stillborn and I was even told there was about a 15% chance of me dying during the CS. We're both fine and he is also looking forward to making his first snowman with his little sister helping. Rest and focus on telling babba to stay put. I knew my doc was doing everything he could to help us and I'm sure that helped me stay calm (ish!).
Wishing you the very best of luck.

FairyJen Sat 19-Jan-13 09:07:48

10 my ds was classed as a stillborn. He was born sleeping however we had an amazing dr who refused to give up on him and managed to revive him! He had the cord round his neck twice and each contraction effectively strangled him.

He is absolutely fine ad perfect now although not widely happy as is teething so is a bit of a grumpy little man.

It is a scary time. It was 11 hours before I got to see him which was awful and even then I only got to spend 10 min with him. However hard it was though I forced myself to remain positive and to keep hold of the fact that if ds was prepared to fight then it was my job to help him!

Keep talkin to him and explain why he needs to stay put.

It is very scary when drs are tellin you news like that but remember babies beat the odds every day! smile

CelticPromise Sat 19-Jan-13 09:15:40

10Storey just wanted to send you love and best wishes. My DS was born at 27 weeks weighing 560g for placental insufficiency. We were told he probably wouldn't survive. He's three now and doing better than the highest hopes we were given.

Bliss website has lots of useful info. Have they talked to you about delivery? I was advised a section gave DS the best chance.

Will be thinking of you.

10storeylovesong Sat 19-Jan-13 09:20:32

Even more good stories! Yeah we had to sign a form to say whether we would be happy with section in case it came down to it and I wasn't in a fit state. They scared me with nightmare stories of scars and struggling with a second pregnancy, esp with this being our first, but like fairysen said then as long as baby is fighting on its my job as his mummy to fight on for him!

KindleMum Sat 19-Jan-13 10:01:24

I would definitely go for a section - if there's any chance the baby is weak, then why risk him struggling during labour? The baby has to do absolutely nothing in a section - I wasn't given the choice though, I was told a CS was the only way and I was happy with that as I'd cross-checked with Dr Google! I don't know why they try to scare women sometimes to push you into vagina delivery or section. There's always a high chance that a prem baby becomes a emergency section anyway so trying to scare you isn't sensible. I've had 2 sections and it's fine. In my case it was life-saving for me and the baby. My scars are fine. Recovery is slower but it's Ok.

10storeylovesong Sat 19-Jan-13 10:02:40

I did sign the form for section - I know from last scan they'd struggle to get him out any other way at moment

gallicgirl Sat 19-Jan-13 10:08:32

There's a great charity called pop n grow that supplies clothing for preemies to NICUs for free.

Hope it's not needed though and your little one stays inside.

When I was in nicu with ds3 I met quite a few parents who'd had 24-28 weekers, the hospital is one of the only ones in quite a distance that take babies from 23-24 weeks.

All the babies had been there a while and were doing really well. I also have 2 friends who had 26 and 28 weekers who are now teenagers.

Fx that you carry on untill at least 28 weeksand having the steroids is a really good thing. Are you getting on for 25 weeks now?

As for cs, I had one with ds3. I have a hip to hip scar and internal cuts into the womb so they could get him out. I became pg 8 weeks later and carried ds4 for 20 weeks with no cs scar problems. I'm now 35 weeks pg and ds3 is still only 22 months and again no problems. Obviously I have increased risk of rupture if I go for vbac but the pregnancys have been fine.

Hi 10, can see at the minute you've just got so much on your plate, how brave you've been, you know where I am for a chat and if you need anything but all my love and fx he stays in as long as possthanks

10storeylovesong Sat 19-Jan-13 16:42:56

Sorry kitty, I've been trying to keep everyone updated and must have missed you out. So sorry!

Thinking of you and your wee man.

I was going to mention pop n grow, but see I've been beaten to it smile they're on Facebook, probably the easiest way to get in touch with them.

Once LO is in nicu you'll be doing tons of hand washing, flexitol hand balm is the only thing that saved my hands from it, I'd recommend that. Lip salve because you'll dehydrate cos it's so hot.

Fwiw I had a 80% chance of going into labour at 23 weeks last time round, DS and I made it to 31 weeks before he was born, although his brothers didn't make it (he's a triplet). He's nearly 3 now, starts preschool in a few weeks and to look at him you would never know the tricky start he had.

Good luck.

Christelle2207 Sun 20-Jan-13 10:27:44

10Storey I can't offer any advice, I'm 12 weeks with my first and hoping your little boy stays put for a while. However I wanted to tell you that if you are being looked after by LWH that's a great thing- I work with the nhs and know that it's one of the best neonatal centres in the country so when your little boy comes you will be in the best possible hands. Best of luck xxx

WhatKatyDidnt Sun 20-Jan-13 16:26:10

10 my heart goes out to you. Can you get hold of a copy of the Bliss Family Handbook? You can order online if your neonatal unit doesn't have one. It is an excellent source of info and I found it invaluable. I was in hospital from 23 weeks and had my DD at 28 weeks, although she was severely growth restricted and born the size of a 24 weeker. She had a rough four months in NNU but she's home now and growing in a way I could never have imagined in the dark early days. Good luck; I will be keeping everything crossed for you and your DS.

ExpatAl Sun 20-Jan-13 17:40:43

Still thinking of you 10storey. Hope you and baby are hanging on in there. x

10, sorry to hear things have gotten even more stressful.

Positive story: my friends ds was born at 27 weeks and she was severely ill herself within hours of the birth. After months in separate hospitals they both got home safe and sound and hell be celebrating his 8th birthday next month, no long term issues at all.

Mama1980 Sun 20-Jan-13 20:47:37

Hi 10 sorry to hear things are even more worrying, i have been thinking of you. my 24 weeks miracle is currently in nicu and had his O2 reduced again today smile he is nearly double his birth weight already. My 26 week old is 4 and bought me melted snow today?! don't think about the odds, my boys were so slim they advised me to terminate many times. And many are based on older data. I don't want to give false hope but just saying stay positive if you can. If you need anything just say, and I'm here if you want to talk. x

10storeylovesong Mon 21-Jan-13 08:05:08

Thanks everyone. I'm just waiting to hear from doctor as they were considering sending me home today as the bleeding has settled. It's strange that I hate hospitals so much but terrified at the thought of going home cos of the distance to hospital if/when it happens again. I can see why they don't just want to keep me in indefinitely though as it could be 24 hours or 4 weeks (fingers crossed its the latter!).

NewYearNewBoo Mon 21-Jan-13 08:39:38

Oh I hope it is the latter and more. Good luck thanks

FairyJen Mon 21-Jan-13 08:49:11

Good luck 10 remember to drs wouldn't send you home if they were massively worried regardless of bed availability. They have a duty of care to you and bump!

Fingers still crossed for you thanks

10storeylovesong Mon 21-Jan-13 10:56:44

Well docs have decided to keep me in as they can't risk the travelling time if it happens again in this weather. I'm to stay until at least the weather's settled.

ExpatAl Mon 21-Jan-13 10:59:43

It's miserable to have to be in the hospital without all your comforts around you at a time like this but you're in the very best place. So glad to hear the bleeding has settled and that baby is still safely snuggled. Every day is brilliant progress.

FairyJen Mon 21-Jan-13 11:00:04

Well your in the best place 10 just make sure dp brings you in some decent food! grin

NewYearNewBoo Mon 21-Jan-13 11:00:53

Well that is reassuring for you, hopefully you won't need any assistance though!! Crossing everything for you and baby.

10storeylovesong Mon 21-Jan-13 11:04:36

I was considering whether I can sneak a dominos order into the ward! I know it's the best place for me - just had my heart set on sleeping in own bed. I was feeling very anxious about being at home as well though so know it's for the best.

FairyJen Mon 21-Jan-13 11:21:22

Can Ou get dp to bring in your pillows etc? When I was in loads women were have takeaway etc saw lots of partners bringing Maccy ds and KFC as well!

MrsPear Mon 21-Jan-13 11:26:38

Hello sorry to hear of your situation. How many weeks and days (every day counts) are you now? I would say as you are stuck in hospital that you should ask for a tour of the unit. I would also go to www.bliss.org.uk and start reading up on what you can expect and the terminology. I have a useless cervix and womb and even my doctor was surprised i got to 30 and 31 weeks. (Although i also had lossess) I would say that for me the hardest thing was giving birth and then not having a baby to hold - if you are lucky they will show you a face and then they run to the neonatal unit. Then you have to leave hospital minus a baby. So i would say in terms of preparing is get yourself a list of supportive friends/family if not there is the bliss helpline. A baby born this early will not be in clothes but a nappy. Good luck and i do hope labour holds off. The good news is the baby is larger than average and you have had steriods. BTW both my boys are well.

MrsPear Mon 21-Jan-13 11:28:35

Oh and do get DH to bring in a take away - i will never forget a sponge that tasted of curry!

Napsalot Mon 21-Jan-13 13:26:20

Just want to pass on my positive thoughts -DC2 was 5 weeks early and that opened my eyes to this experience of having a premie -I can only imagine what you must be going through. Rest up and all the best.

MustafaCake Mon 21-Jan-13 13:36:15

Sending you lots of positive vibes to keep baby inside for a while longer yet!

DS2 was a prem and in NICU for a time. There were some amazing little 24 weekers in there (big London teaching hospital which took very tiny babies from other hospitals).

My tip would be to speak with the lactation expert (usually one of the NICU nurses) about how to get breastmilk established. I was advised to express every few hours day and night (knackering) and it went in the nasal feeding tube. Made me feel like I was doing something to help DS2 as I felt otherwise completely useless as all his care was provided by the staff.

I wish you all the best x

fairimum Mon 21-Jan-13 13:43:17

when baby does arrive do contact www.popngrow.co.uk/ - they provide free special clothes for prem babies that dont get in the way of wires etc (our scbu hated the ones you can get in mothercare as are all velcro and got attached to name bands and sats monitor etc, but they loved these and the charity has how sent them a supply. but if you/friend etc email as soon as baby arrives they will send baby a package to the hospital with a special set just for them - all free! smile was lovely to get for DD, just in time for her to come out of her incubator smile

fairimum Mon 21-Jan-13 13:44:18

www.popngrow.co.uk/#/tlc-packs/4570505425 - they have a facebook page too - dd is on there in her pop n grow clothes smile

FairyJen Tue 22-Jan-13 09:56:01

How are you getting on today?

10storeylovesong Tue 22-Jan-13 10:47:07

Consultant has just said I can go home - so relieved as didn't get a wink of sleep last night. I've got a scan booked for next Tues so it's just a case of crossing fingers and hoping nothing happens in the meantime.

NewYearNewBoo Tue 22-Jan-13 10:50:10

I am so pleased you get to go home, will you became very familiar with your sofa and duvet now?? More importantly, did you get your take away grin

Keep us posted with your news.

ExpatAl Tue 22-Jan-13 11:01:18

So glad you're going home. The consultant must be pleased with how you're doing. Remember to take it very very easy. x

10storeylovesong Tue 22-Jan-13 11:06:27

Important issue first... No takeaway last night but I've been promised my choice tonight! I'm leaning towards Dominos although a greasy Chinese sounds good too!

I got to have a tour of the neo natal unit yesterday and I chat with some of the mums in there. Obviously it was upsetting seeing all those tiny babies in the incubators, but do think it helped to prepare ourselves and to hear some good news stories and see photos as well. They showed me the expressing room which was good to know about an gave me some leaflets about how it all works. I've got a DVD to take home with me as well which shows all the equipment and runs you through all the technical terms and what happens during delivery and the first few hours so just a bit more aware. I feel a bit better knowing a bit more about what can happen, and dh said that its really helped him as he didn't want to see it but now he feels more prepared, especially as they sat him down to discuss what happens with the dads (eg how he would be first one with baby if I'm recovering and talked him through kangaroo care etc so he doesn't feel as helpless). They have all been fantastic.

FairyJen Tue 22-Jan-13 11:10:45

That's brilliant news 10

On the takeaway issue you are pregnant so maybe small portion from both dominoes and Chinese???? < greedy mare emoticon >

10storeylovesong Tue 22-Jan-13 11:40:06

Haha I like your style! Maybe one for lunch and one for dinner... hmmm...

ExpatAl Tue 22-Jan-13 12:09:22

Remember, baby needs his food so you're doing a GOOD thing.

Christelle2207 Tue 22-Jan-13 12:43:24

fab news.

NewYearNewBoo Tue 22-Jan-13 12:57:50

First things first, I'm a big fan of Chinese so it would be an easy decision for me grin

The tour and information sounds like the best thing you and Mr10 could have done, brilliant preparation, I think fear of the unknown can make almost any situation worse! Fingers crossed you stay pregnant for many many weeks!

lotsofcheese Tue 22-Jan-13 18:48:41

Enjoy your takeaway! It's a good sign that they feel confident enough to send you home.

Will be crossing everything for you. Keep us posted & take care of yourself xx

MrsRoss26 Tue 22-Jan-13 19:23:31

I've been lurking on here and wanted to add my best wishes for a safe delivery and healthy baby. I wanted to add that all of my mum's and her mum's babies were prem and we're all very healthy adults with no health issues. I hope that this is a one-off for you (if you have any more babies) and all goes well. hugs

CelticPromise Tue 22-Jan-13 22:30:20

Glad you are home 10 and that you got a look at the unit. Is it the Small Wonders DVD you have? It's really good if so, definitely worth a look.

Still thinking of you!

Dysgu Tue 22-Jan-13 22:46:49

Good to read that they have let you go home 10 - hopefully you will feel more relaxed on your own sofa and that baby will stay put for a long time yet. Just make sure that you really do rest and take it easy as it will be tempting to think you feel fine and can get on with stuff. You need to practise being 'lazy' and keep your feet up. Is Mr10 able to stay home and look after you - or can you just get set up on the sofa each morning. This is when a downstairs loo is really handy too! grin

I think a tour of the NICU was a great idea. Yes it brings it all home to you but at least you know more about it rather than seeing/hearing/feeling it for the first time not too long after giving birth. Yes Mr10 is likely to be the first one to see your baby - make sure he has a camera handy so he can bring you a picture. I did not even get a look at DD1 before they whisked her away to NICU but the staff were great and brought me a photo before I had even been stitched up. In some ways it is still one of my favourite pictures although not one we have on display.

Anyway, take it easy, eat plenty and keep telling that special little person to stay put (which is what we are doing with ours even though it is not making any immediate moves to head out!)

Dysgu Tue 22-Jan-13 22:47:51

Oh yes, and the Small Wonders DVD is great - we were part of the research group with DD2 and wish it had been available when we had our early babies.

10storeylovesong Wed 23-Jan-13 10:13:50

Yes it's the small wonders DVD - we'll be watching it at some point today. Someone else also mentioned Bliss leaflets - I've been given a few of those so feel as emotionally prepared as can be at the minute.

Luckily dh is off work until Thursday night and is waiting on me hand and foot (read driving me mad hovering round and not letting me move an inch! Bless him). He will be depositing me at my mums Thursday afternoon and I'll be staying there over the weekend so not on my own. This is what they did last week and I thought it was complete overkill - until Fri at 4am when it all happened and was just so glad hadn't been home alone.

I'm just hoping all is uneventful now until next scan which is next Tuesday and crossing my fingers for good news that baby is still growing well.

24+6 today!

Great to hear that the days are being ticked off.

TomDudgeon Wed 23-Jan-13 10:48:37

Just wanted to add another reassuring story
I bled thought my pregnancy with dd (dc3) Heavy bright bleeding. I could sit on the loo and the blood flowing out would sound like I was weeing. Sadly I lost her twin at 11 weeks.
At around 24 weeks they decided to admit me as then as that counts as viability.
I was still bleeding, losing huge clots and my waters started leaking.
It was stressful not just because of worrying about her but I also had a 19 mth and a just 3 year old at home.
I had the jabs and they transferred me to a hospital with a earlier stage NICU miles from my family and then back to another one nearer home. I made it to 27+ when she was born by crash section and given 5% chance of survival.
She's now a happy and healthy 6 yet old with no physical problems and though she's not the most academic and is definitely behind for her age she will be ok and will manage a decent enough education.
I thought might story might ring some bells for you and help add to the other reassuring stories on here. We all know that things could not be the happy ending but if we don't have hope we have nothing.

TomDudgeon Wed 23-Jan-13 10:52:53

As for practical tips
Pack yourself a normal hospital bag
Maybe order some nappies and some small and soft. It feels good to leave them something. Other than that worry about the rest later. Other people can pick you up what you need when you need it and the hospital will lend you anything you need to start with.
Oh an I've had dc4 since at term, as a vbac. Worry about the future as is happens, for now take care of yourself and do as little as possible (especially if your waters are leaking)

Tiredtrout Thu 24-Jan-13 13:01:58

How are you today?

10storeylovesong Thu 24-Jan-13 15:04:20

I'm ok thanks. 25 weeks today - so another week ticked off! Just feel like I'm sat around waiting for something that I have no idea when or how will happen.

Tiredtrout Thu 24-Jan-13 16:30:22

That's good, longer your sat bored the better!

lotsofcheese Thu 24-Jan-13 19:23:34

Great news you've made it to 25 weeks - every day inside counts!!

I can sympathise with your "timebomb" feelings - I'm also at risk of another premature birth & counting the days. One day at a time!!

10storeylovesong Tue 29-Jan-13 11:30:40

lotsofcheese fingers crossed your little one stays put as well!

we've finally had some good news! The baby's growing well, slightly above average, and the bleed has shrunk by about 4cms so they think that it's reabsorbing into placenta which is great news. Got another scan in 2 weeks to check on it again and still not out of the woods, but fingers crossed its not looking as serious as it was.

25+5 today.

LaVitaBellissima Tue 29-Jan-13 11:39:25

Good luck 10, I had Identical twin girls at 34 &3 and was incredibly lucky that we were out after 5 nights.

Will be thinking positive thoughts for you, I'd definitely go for Chinese! Nothing spicy though as I'm convinced that I went into labour after eating Jamie Oliver's spicy chilli mushroom recipe!

That's good news! I'm booked in for a cs on Friday, so after all these
months worrying about him being prem we have no reached the point where they are going in to get him out!

10storeylovesong Tue 29-Jan-13 11:54:26

How far along are you moomin? I'll be made up if we get to that point!

That's great to hear lavita - sounds like your girls were little fighters!

I'll be 38+2 on Friday, I have a hip to hip cs scar from my emcs with ds3 but because i have an incompetent cervix they said I could try a vbac.

They've decided I'm at the point now where it would be dangerous for me to attempt vbac as the baby is bigger, so think it's safer to deliver this week because when labour starts I could be really quick.

This is ds5 and my only term baby was ds1 who weighed 11lb 2

10storeylovesong Sun 10-Feb-13 06:49:36

Sebastian Michael, 2 lb 3 oz of perfection made a dramatic entrance to the world at 19.58 hrs on Saturday 9th February 2013. He is on the NICU ward and doing well, in fact they have had to give him morphine to make him sleep as he was fighting against the ventilator to breath for himself when they want him to have air for a few days. The doctors are saying he is not acting at all like a 27 weeker and hope we may be able to hold him in a few days if he continues doing as well. He is absolutely gorgeous with a mop of jet black hair (a surprise as we're both blonde!).

I'm doing ok. I had to have surgery to remove the placenta as it was attached to the side but aside from a few aches and pains am feeling physically ok. I'm going to try and sleep now so I can be up bright and early to see him again.

Thanks for all your support - it has meant a lot.

Napsalot Sun 10-Feb-13 07:43:13

Congratulations! Welcome to the world baby Sebastian! Well done on making it to 27 weeks. Hope you are getting some rest.

Kveta Sun 10-Feb-13 07:50:25

Congratulations, he sounds fantastic smile

FairyJen Sun 10-Feb-13 07:56:45

Congratulations and gorgeous name!

Well done you as now get lots of rest!!!!

FairyJen Sun 10-Feb-13 07:57:03

* and get lots of rest blush

Tiredtrout Sun 10-Feb-13 07:58:22

Congratulations, so glad you're both doing well

giraffesCantEatNHSPotatoes Sun 10-Feb-13 08:04:24

Congratulations!!! :-)

CelticPromise Sun 10-Feb-13 08:09:44

Congratulations 10Storey on the birth of your little boy. So glad he's doing well.

NICU is a tough journey so make sure you look after yourself. I hope you're getting plenty of support. Are you expressing? Hope you get to hold him soon, skin to skin is good for both of you. I remember the first time I held my 27 weeker like it was yesterday. Just wanted to add as well it's perfectly possible to hold him while he's ventilated, so don't be afraid to ask.

Best wishes to you and your son.

Wereonourway Sun 10-Feb-13 08:14:48

Congratulations ten storey( love your username).
Little Sebastian will get stronger every day I'm sure.
Take care of yourself and rest as much as possible x

Kt8791 Sun 10-Feb-13 08:16:46

Many congratulations:-)

10storeylovesong Sun 10-Feb-13 08:19:53

Thanks everyone.

celtic I'm hoping to express but due to the surgery and the late hour yesterday midwives said they'll speak to me about it today. We keep getting told it's a day at a time and I know it's going to be so hard, but at the minute I'm just relieved he's doing well today.

lotsofcheese Sun 10-Feb-13 08:25:18

Just wanted to add my congratulations!! What a lovely name. And a good weight too.

As others have pointed out, NICU is a real roller coaster. Please keep posting for support.

Sending your wee man love & strength xx

FairyJen Sun 10-Feb-13 08:26:52

Make sure you get lots of pics as well Ot helpe me get through the night havin pics to look at and also nicu will let you call down at any time to get updates if your a worrier like me! wink

AdriftAndOutOfStardust Sun 10-Feb-13 08:28:36

Congratulations and wishing you all the best.

CelticPromise Sun 10-Feb-13 09:23:11

Bless you sounds like you've had a tough time. Yes one day at a time is the only way to go.

I'm a BF supporter at our local unit. I know it is very tough but if you want to express it's important to get going as soon as possible after birth, so don't let them leave it too long to show you. If you want to get started there is a great demo of hand expressing on the Small Winners DVD, and also good info in the Bliss booklet Breastfeeding your Premature Baby.

Don't want to put you under pressure, I just spend a lot of time helping NICU mums. I know support can be hard to come by at the weekend and wanted to make sure you get the right info. smile

Sokmonsta Sun 10-Feb-13 09:51:50

Have you checked whether your hospital does week long parking tickets? Ours does, they're not well advertised! But £15 for a while week saves a fortune, and of course if you are in/out over the course of a week, it's still valid.

pixiestix Sun 10-Feb-13 13:21:13

Congratulations! Welcome to the world little Sebastian. smile

Congratulations to you and your family x

Christelle2207 Sun 10-Feb-13 15:46:23

That brilliant news! Best of luck to you both xxxx

10storeylovesong Mon 11-Feb-13 08:02:37

sokmonsta the hospital do a deal where if you buy 5 days worth of tickets they validate them and its then £3 a week after that, so just saving up those tickets.

celtic I finally chased someone down yesterday afternoon and got started on it. Not managed to get a lot but I was unbelievably proud of the little I managed - and the nurse said she couldn't help but smile as I marched into the ward clutching my syringe. Makes me feel so much better knowing I can stockpile those little drops for as soon as he's ready for them, instead of just watching by the sidelines while other people take care of him.

BaconandEgg Mon 11-Feb-13 08:16:05

My 32 weeker is now an active 18 month old who loves doing his 3 year old brother's puzzles. But the first few weeks were emotionally tough so do take care of yourself and take all the help that is on offer. I was about to take my prem baby books to the charity shop, but would be happy to send them your way if that would help. Let me know if you'd like them.

CelticPromise Mon 11-Feb-13 08:46:04

It's a great feeling isn't it? Knowing only you can do something so vital for your little boy. smile I remember my first 0.5ml syringe, I was so pleased! Are you still on the ward or have you been discharged?

I wish you a peaceful day today.

I remember that with my 32 weeker, it was the tiniest amount but I was so pleased with myself! Do the hospital have electric pumps? I found I was soon able to produce enough for feeds when I started using a pump.

I met a women last week while having ds4 who's baby was born at 25 weeks, they put you up in the hospital hotel where I am if you want. She's just hitting what should have been her due date and the baby is coming home this week!

10storeylovesong Tue 12-Feb-13 07:54:30

It is a great feeling and the hospital have been fantastic helping me out with it. I'm still on the ward for the time being and using the hospital pumps, and they will loan me a pump for when I go home so I can carry on there. He had his first taste of it last night - just a drop on a cotton bud which I rubbed on the inside of his lips and he loved it and was trying to get some more! He's going to be having this small amount every 2 hours while they see if his stomach can cope with it.

moomin that's great news - she must be so made up. How's your little one?

CelticPromise Tue 12-Feb-13 13:09:37

Ah brilliant that he's able to try it already. How's his breathing?

Great news that the hospital are supportive with expressing too! It's hard going, especially in the early hours, but so worth it. Hope you are recovering ok too.

sharni20 Tue 12-Feb-13 14:23:04

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

10storeylovesong Wed 13-Feb-13 08:46:15

He's doing so well. He was off his ventilator by Monday and onto Cpap but he's determined to be off that soon as well! He keeps grabbing at the mask and trying to pull it off, so yesterday they took him off it for an hour and let me take him out of the incubator and cuddle him. It was amazing! I went in to see him in the early hours and he was off it again then as he'd been making so much fuss, so they let him have 2 hours of freedom and his breathing was fantastic with no alarms or blips.

He's having more milk now as well - 2ml every 2 hours direct into his stomach and is coping with it really well so all good signs.

I'm so proud of him!

Wereonourway Wed 13-Feb-13 09:45:20

So pleased to hear he's doing well.
My ds was on cpap for five days and they were great in weaning him off it. Remember the amount of time he was off it creeping up and it was brilliant.
Are you able to do all of his cares, it was great for us to be able to do that.
Hope you are keeping well too op, look after yourself and hope little Sebastian keeps battling his cpap!

CelticPromise Wed 13-Feb-13 20:24:22

Brilliant news. How are you feeling? Don't forget your own recovery!

Hope you are getting lots of cuddles.

Heavywheezing Wed 13-Feb-13 20:33:42

How wonderful. I wish you and your little one all the best.

My sil had her two boys at 34 weeks weighing 4lbs, they are wonderful little boys.

Tiredtrout Sat 23-Feb-13 18:44:00

How's you and Sebastian today?

Congratulations and welcome to little Sebastian smile

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