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belly wrapping! must share!

(163 Posts)
aries24 Fri 10-Aug-12 07:21:06

I'm 25weeks. Something I found out and must share for those who don't know. Having quite an attractive body, the thought of pregnancy has always scared me to the point of non excitment (although I adore children) because generally most women lose their flat tummys afterwards! And no amount of gyming and losing weight gets it exactly the way it was(I've seen this in many as work at a nursery school). So all my time I've just accepted this fact until I saw a friend of mine two months after the birth of her DD with an incredibly sexy flat tummy! She told me about belly wrapping! You wrap your tummy for 40 days night and day, very very tightly. It pushes the womb right back into place which doesn't happen naturally! And restores stretch marks by 50%!!!! Apparently its a very ancient practice in many cultures around the world!! Hope this helps for some of you's!! I can't wait to try it

EmpireBiscuit Fri 10-Aug-12 07:22:03


aries24 Fri 10-Aug-12 07:25:23

Obviously after birth you start this procedure lol

PurplePidjin Fri 10-Aug-12 07:38:06

I'm quite looking forward to being proud of my body's acheivement instead of paranoid about others' opinions of it once I've completed the miracle of creating new life hmm

And lots of walking and swimming - healthy is important...

aries24 Fri 10-Aug-12 07:45:28

I'm not paranoid of other peoples opinions, I've always just loved my body by eating correctly and gyming right, its my way of life. No need for insinuations smile

I have a gorgeous and fit body too. Luckily I am not bothered with it becoming flabby and stretch marked.

It's a pity this type of thing is worrying you so much.

SoupDragon Fri 10-Aug-12 07:49:41


Ra88 Fri 10-Aug-12 07:50:31

If that's what she wants to try then let her ! I don't believe that any woman would actually pick to have a flabby stomach rather than a flat one .. Go for it ! grin

worriedwretch Fri 10-Aug-12 07:51:55

If the wrapping torture isn't for you, one of my gorgeous friends suggested nothing but Marlboro lights and water for 40 days.


aries24 Fri 10-Aug-12 07:52:13

yes it did worry me, but not that it would affect my DH as he's a very understanding type but I would like to give him back the body he married smile lol

PicklesThePottyMouthedParrot Fri 10-Aug-12 07:53:08

Not for me but don't be mean! She's only trying to help.

I gave up on my stomach a long time ago Aries!

PicklesThePottyMouthedParrot Fri 10-Aug-12 07:53:49

Worried, that's more like it. Though can you have chips instead of water?

aries24 Fri 10-Aug-12 07:55:39

PicklesThePottyMouthedParrot - thanks

threeleftfeet Fri 10-Aug-12 07:58:07

Actually I found the best thing I did to loose weight after having DS was breastfeeding. I was a 16-18 before pregnancy, and a size 14 by the time DS was 3 months. I did nothing else to keep in shape at the time, in fact I was craving energy and so ate plenty of sweet things!

I called it my eat-cake-and-breastfeed diet grin

Pickles77 Fri 10-Aug-12 07:58:39

So what do you wrap with Aries? And is it on constantly? Just interested. smile

aries24 Fri 10-Aug-12 08:01:28

pickles27 Google it, you can buy the wraps online

worriedwretch Fri 10-Aug-12 08:02:13

pickles obviously! Dur! They're just made from vegetables any way.

addictedisback Fri 10-Aug-12 08:02:36

yes it did worry me, but not that it would affect my DH as he's a very understanding type but I would like to give him back the body he married lol

Seriously? Seriously?

And your dh is exactly the same shape as when you married? hmm you will have given birth to a baby, what are you going to do to make sure your boobs dont droop and stretch during pregnancy?

RobinSparkles Fri 10-Aug-12 08:02:53

The best thing that you can do is eat healthily during pregnancy and keep active where possible (obviously it's not advised to take up new excercises but ones that you do already are ok).

I doubt that "body wrapping" works, TBH. Otherwise just slapping on a pair of really tight Spanx would work!

I personally think that the figure that you have post pregnancy is down to the health/fitness you had before pregnancy (ie. if you were very toned beforehand it will make a big difference to how flat it stays aftewards) and luck.

aries24 Fri 10-Aug-12 08:02:53

Some of you ladies have no right to be mean! How childish! Sigh

Pickles77 Fri 10-Aug-12 08:04:13

Thanks Aries smile

PurplePidjin Fri 10-Aug-12 08:04:17

But surely there'll be more important things to do after the birth than fret about a flat tummy confused

Imo beauty isn't about appearance, it's about actions. So my post-birth body will be beautiful because it made a whole new person, not because it sprang back into shape in a week.

Slainte Fri 10-Aug-12 08:05:20

I would like to give him back the body he married

Your DH actually married a whole person not just a body. This is probably one of the most shallow posts I've ever read on MN.

aries24 Fri 10-Aug-12 08:06:29

addictedisback by DH actially looks better now than on the wedding day! Were just fitness types

herethereandeverywhere Fri 10-Aug-12 08:07:44

Your husband married a body? Mine married a person.

WoodlandHills Fri 10-Aug-12 08:08:52

Oh dear...this one should get interesting

<marks place>

PicklesThePottyMouthedParrot Fri 10-Aug-12 08:08:57

Who said she's worried about it? To be fair if your into health & fitness and are young with a nice body whats the harm in trying something like this, if you think it's going to work?

People use stretch mark cream and things like that without being lambasted on here.

PurplePidjin Fri 10-Aug-12 08:09:46

Aries, on mn most people believe that living to please a man is an out-moded concept that generations of women have fought, and are still fighting, against.

Forcing your body into a particular shape purely to be attractive to men is a huge part of this.

Obviously, eating well and exercising to stay healthy are A Good Thing. The difference is in the motivation, and sexual allure is a side effect as opposed to the entire point!

RobinSparkles Fri 10-Aug-12 08:11:11

I'm sure that your DH will love your post pregnancy body Aries, after all, it will have grown and given birth to the most precious thing that he will ever have.

I do think that women put far too much pressure on themselves to lose their baby weight quickly, myself included but it's not healthy. We should be focusing on the wonderful thing that we have created and just be as healthy as we can.

aries24 Fri 10-Aug-12 08:12:52

Well excuse me if I want my DH to still look at my 'sexy' body than at some other sexy women in a mag or walking past! Some of you women are making me feel so despondent! Was only trying to help those of you who maybe had similar thoughts

PicklesThePottyMouthedParrot Fri 10-Aug-12 08:14:30

These points are fair enough Aries make sure you don't put any pressure in yourself. Your body will change after having a baby but if your young and fit you should be fine.

You will be active anyway running around with a new baby!

RobinSparkles Fri 10-Aug-12 08:15:03

There's nothing wrong with wanting to look your best! smile

PicklesThePottyMouthedParrot Fri 10-Aug-12 08:16:22

You shouldn't have to worry about your dp looking at other women in mags etc though Aries. He should be looking at you and the new baby!

Hope this is for yourself, talk to him if you feel under pressure. You shouldn't do.

Don't feel despondent. Some comments here are trying to help.

WoodlandHills Fri 10-Aug-12 08:16:29

And does she think that her sexy body (that her DH married hmm ) won't change with age anyway? so even if the torture wrapping worked what's she going to do in the coming years when she starts ageing?

And what if she has to have a c/s and ends up with a scar? Or if she has a natural birth her vagina doesn't go back to the vagina she had pre DC?

I don't think binding your abdomen straight after birth would do any good at all anyway, I should imagine it would compress the uterus down too much and cause more bleeding. And the thought of doing it post c/s - ouch shock

I just think her OP comes across as very shallow and immature tbh.

aries24 Fri 10-Aug-12 08:17:12

Well I am in and from South Arica so maybe peoples perceptions are different here

PurplePidjin Fri 10-Aug-12 08:17:58

But your body will still be sexy! It just won't look the same as before you produced the miracle of new life!

I'm 24 weeks today so a week behind you; there are enough terrifying things about being a parent for the first time without worrying about "keeping my man".

As i said in my first post, walking and swimming should be more than adequate to keep my health post partum. I see no need to add to the pressure I'm already putting myself under.

kidcrayola Fri 10-Aug-12 08:18:20

Aries i'm with you on this one. I've always taken pride in my appearance and any extra help (along with exercise, eating healthy and breast feeding) that can help me get back to my original figure the better.
I've been doing a lot of reading on belly binding and have read a lot of positive posts on it including how it can give your back a lot of support and that t helps to repair your stomach muscles.
Also read coconut oil helps lots too!

worriedwretch Fri 10-Aug-12 08:18:45

I agree, there isn't any thing wrong with wantin to look your best.

Depends on your motivation though doesn't it.

panicnotanymore Fri 10-Aug-12 08:19:08

I bet lots of women on here will be going to quite a lot of effort to get back into their pre-pregnancy jeans. There is a whole industry devoted to pre and post natal personal training. It is not politically correct to admit to it though, and body wrapping is not acceptably western hence you will get slated.

I won't be trying myself, but I will be working on my health and fitness.

worriedwretch Fri 10-Aug-12 08:19:48


PurplePidjin Fri 10-Aug-12 08:24:10

Depends on your motivation though doesn't it.

Yes. I want to be fit and healthy to maximise my chances of a long life with dp and dc(s)

I want to fit into my post pg jeans because I'm too skint to afford new ones!

PurplePidjin Fri 10-Aug-12 08:24:43

*pre pg jeans blush

aries24 Fri 10-Aug-12 08:26:55

panicnotanymore your right its not a westernized thing! But I'm from South africa and have seen it work, it really does! Obviously its not going to work if your body was out of shape before hand

Chunkychicken Fri 10-Aug-12 08:27:38

I couldn't give a monkeys whether other people want to try this - afterall there are women that have worn corsets every day of their lives to get exceptionally narrow waists or had boob jobs or botox to 'maintain' their sexy bodies, which have never appealed to me at all.

Personally I find it a little sad that the miracle of childbearing is not appreciated for what it is and that worries about the post-partum body shape are at the forefront of any woman's mind during pregnancy.

But then my career doesn't directly relate to my body, nor does my love-life for that matter. Perhaps I would have a different perspective if it did?

BalloonSlayer Fri 10-Aug-12 08:30:32

I had 3 CS and although I was advised to wear loose comfy clothing afterwards I found that slightly tighter clothing (like stuff I had worn at 4-5 months pregnant) was much more comfortable in the first couple of days after birth. Otherwise it felt like everything was all loose and flobbering about inside me. I suspect this is the same principle.

hmm at "pushes the womb right back into place which doesn't happen naturally!" for two reasons:

a) Where does the womb go then? In your handbag? I seem to remember the MW visiting me at home and saying she could feel that my uterus had gone back to where it was meant to already.

b) That statement is an oxymoron. If the womb does not go right back into place naturally, then it is NATURAL for it to remain wherever it is it ended up.

As far as I am aware, having lived in Southern Africa for 22 years, African and Indian women in that part of Africa do not belly bind. Infact, I did not know any English or Afrikaans speaking women who belly bind either. It must be a new trend in SA now.

PicklesThePottyMouthedParrot Fri 10-Aug-12 08:39:23

Chunky, you can appreciate the miracle of childbirth etc erc and still want to look nice you know.

Aries is only going to wrap her belly it's not going to prevent her looking after or appreciating her baby.

sarahmia Fri 10-Aug-12 08:51:54

Don't understand why everyone has such an issue with this post.. Although possibly it should have been posted elsewhere. My friend lives in hong kong and it's routine for them to give you a corset type thing after birth to help your womb go back better? Quicker? Not sure. Or if you've had a section so that your scar heals quicker. She swears by it. Each to their own. Personally... Think I could wrap myself from head to foot and I don't think it would help my cake bum

Badgerina Fri 10-Aug-12 08:52:07

So let me get this straight: body wrapping will make my uterus go back to its original place, thereby granting me a flat stomach? So it's not that my stomach muscles have been stretched by 9 months of needing to accommodate a growing baby? It's my uterus (which shrinks back to just over the size of my fist) that is to blame????

20weeksandcounting Fri 10-Aug-12 08:56:08

What's the big deal - sounds interesting to me I'm on my fourth and my belly was bad enough before !

Chunkychicken Fri 10-Aug-12 08:57:01

Yes Pickles but isn't the energy expended into worrying about the post-baby shape a waste of energy when you could focus on how your changing shape is the very epitome of womanly and that that in itself is sexy & beautiful??!!

I've had 3 thoughts since I posted;
1) isn't "flat stomach = sexy stomach" a very western concept?
2) doesn't binding actually prevent your stomach muscles (particularly the transverse abdominal muscles that work so hard in keeping us upright & get very stretched in pg) doing work? And if you're preventing them doing work then aren't you actually contributing to them being weaker? Surely sitting on a gym ball and/or doing gentle abdominal exercises will assist the muscles more?

And 3) OP as a 'fitness type' why do you want a quick fix? Surely you enjoy the exercise you do, rather than the aim being just body beautiful? If you do enjoy the exercise, why not just spend your time at the gym post-baby working on gently exercising your abdominals and getting your figure into a healthy way? Breastfeeding would help your stomach return to 'normal' too.

PicklesThePottyMouthedParrot Fri 10-Aug-12 08:57:55

She didn't exactly say that but just have a pop anyway.

Chunkychicken Fri 10-Aug-12 09:01:12

How is that 'having a pop' Pickles??!!!! confused

She said she was a fitness type upthread...

I just have always assumed people that spend a lot of time at the gym or playing sport do it because they enjoy it. Clearly I'm wrong & life isn't too short to spend time doing something you hate just to end up with an attractive corpse at the end of it hmm

PicklesThePottyMouthedParrot Fri 10-Aug-12 09:04:08

I hadn't actually seen your post chunky.

We must have posted at the same time.

Kaloobear Fri 10-Aug-12 09:07:27

The Tupler Technique recommends using a splint which I think is essentially the same thing, as well as doing various exercises to close your diastasis. I don't think it's vain to want to look how you did pre-pregnancy, though I do think it's a bit unrealistic and you might find you care less once you've had the baby smile

exexe Fri 10-Aug-12 09:09:33

I'm going to try this. They have wraps/corsets on Amazon.
My Braziallian friend did this as she says its very common in Brazil and after 2 kids, her stomach is totally flat.

I'm not exactly aspiring to that as I have a couple of stones to lose as well but it would be nice not to still look pregnant after 6 months.
Hell, I'll give anything a go to look better with minimum effort.

Purplecatti Fri 10-Aug-12 09:12:18

Where I lived in India it was standard practice to belly wrap after birth using strips of cotton. It was done within 24 hours of birth.
I will be doing it but I'll probably buy one of those wrap things than tie myself up every morning. I think I'll have more important things to be getting on with.
I don't know how well they worked but the idea is that the bindings push back and support everything that was stretched during pregnancy for the first 6 weeks. They believed it helped your stomach muscles to knit back into place.
I'm not sure about getting your figure back with binding but all the ladies I saw were back looking lovely in their sari pretty quickly although they were usually slim and rather fit to begin with, and they did know how to tie their sari in the most flattering way.
I think the main reason was it felt nice to be bound in and supported for a while, similar to a corset. That's the reason I will be doing it really. My back has been very painful and I would like some support until I'm OK to exercise properly again.

PurplePidjin Fri 10-Aug-12 09:14:41

See, my fit and healthy friends have regained their figures quickly anyway - including one who's baby was just shy of 11lb.

PicklesThePottyMouthedParrot Fri 10-Aug-12 09:17:53

Chunky is does come across like you are telling her a but what she should think & do. You ate obviously of a very different though process to her.

1) yes flat stomachs are considered sexy in the west. We are in the west. Op finds them sexy. She wants to keep hers (If possible)

2) I am no expert on this, so I can't really comment if it works or not. Tempted to google but won't!

3) she hasn't said she won't be doing enjoyable exercise.

I think it's a bit if a worry that a lot if this seems to be worry about her partner.

But I think if she enjoys her body and wants to try a faddy thing that night or might not work to encourage a flat stomach, why not?

I said earlier, If I asked for a good tip for a stretch mark cream or similar I don't think I'd get lambasted.

Your body does change, some elements you may not like (or not everyone)

I don't think it made you a shallow person to admit that and try something to avoid it?

I'm growing some fearsome varicose veins. I won't be wearing these as a badge of honour.

CakeBump Fri 10-Aug-12 09:19:21

I don't think there's any need for the snarkiness ladies....

Whatever floats your boat....

RobinSparkles Fri 10-Aug-12 09:25:39

"I'm not sure about getting your figure back with binding but all the ladies I saw were back looking lovely in their sari pretty quickly although they were usually slim and rather fit to begin with, and they did know how to tie their sari in the most flattering way. "

Exactly!!! I know quite a few women who have got their flat stomachs back really quickly after birth, all of which had washboard abs beforehand. I think the stronger your stomach muscles are prepregnancy the better they will cope and spring back afterwards.

OP, if you are as fit and flat stomached as you say you are you should be fine!

PicklesThePottyMouthedParrot Fri 10-Aug-12 09:28:34

This is true. I'm imagining you with a Jessica Ennis physique op!

Oh my god you women are all so vicious!! She was only suggesting a way of getting back into shape, why the hell are all the claws out???

I've never been particularly fit (extremely curvy size 12) and don't exercise much, and it does worry me that my hubby won't find me attractive anymore... doesn't everyone have that niggle of insecurity? My hubby is a good man and loves me lots, but unfortunately he is still a man and likes attractive women!!

Honestly, all of you that for whatever reason acted so out of turn to this poor woman's comment, you should feel properly ashamed of yourselves. Do you think she's going to want to come back on these forums and talk to you all anymore?? What if she needed advice but couldn't turn to this forum because you've all been unnecessarily bitchy over what was, essentially, a SUGGESTION.

If any of the kids in my class behaved the way you did, I'd be dragging their parents in to talk to them about their spiteful behaviour.


PicklesThePottyMouthedParrot Fri 10-Aug-12 09:57:15

Trick is to have a partner with a bigger belly than you, like mine grin

exexe Fri 10-Aug-12 10:05:05

I'm thinking of getting this one;


I don't understand why the op got a blasting. There are plenty of women dieting and exercising to get their figures back. There are threads galore on getting better skin. Style and Beauty threads are full of women wanting advice on flattering outfits.

Whats the difference?

This is something that women in different cultures have been doing for centuries.

PicklesThePottyMouthedParrot Fri 10-Aug-12 10:10:08

Man they are some Bridget jones pants!


poppy283 Fri 10-Aug-12 10:11:50

Strikes me as rather old fashioned, puts me in mind of corsets, foot binding etc.

And effing uncomfortable and hot! Although if you're due in the winter perhaps nice and cosy...

I got my flat stomach back by breastfeeding, I know not everyone's as lucky but this seems a little ... odd to me.

exexe Fri 10-Aug-12 10:12:20

Hopefully it'll be as comfortable and supportive too grin

Kelbells Fri 10-Aug-12 10:12:46

I'm in shock that this poster's is getting such a hard time.

Each to their own, we're all making very personal and different decisions from each other when it comes to when to tell family, when to tell work, maternity leave, pain relief, vit k for the baby, bf vs ff even changing bags! Why should this be any different! What she's suggesting is fairly innocuous, not risking her baby's health... I've read so many posts about changing bodies over the course of my pregnancy and how different people feel about it... This isn't for me... It might not be for you... but does it really so much matter to you all if she wants to try something a little bit different to get back into shape after the pregnancy.

She hasn't posted on AIBU!

Hairtodayandgonetomorrow Fri 10-Aug-12 10:14:55

Your friend might just have been lucky. SIL always snaps right back into shape whereas I was a stripey blob for about a year after I gave birth (and she bottlefed and I breastfed).

londonlivvy Fri 10-Aug-12 10:18:15

Humn. I'm not entirely sure why the OP is getting a blasting either.

Whilst I agree that in the immediate post-natal period the focus must surely be on looking after the baby, rather than worrying about fitting into your jeans, I want to get back my figure too. And it doesn't seem unnatural to want to do so, accepting of course that it won't be immediate and it'll be harder to find time and energy to do the exercise that you used to do. Getting back my figure is not about pleasing my partner, it's because I like being fit, healthy and strong and enjoy the destressing that exercise provides.

I'm not at all sure re belly wrapping as a concept though. And MY it is unattractive. not sure that would help with post-birth morale?!

I agree with chunkychicken that it seems more logical to gently get active, get walking, then sitting on an exercise ball then move to abdominal exercises, combined with a healthy eating programme that's appropriate for breastfeeding. Both my sisters managed to get their stomachs back that way and so that's my plan.

PicklesThePottyMouthedParrot Fri 10-Aug-12 10:19:46

Well my pants weren't much nicer in the weeks after. I wore tesco value pants and threw them all away.

Lexiindisguise Fri 10-Aug-12 10:22:26

I've only been on Mumsnet a few weld (10 weeks pg) and it's stuff like this that puts me off - some of you are so judgemental! I'm worried about my figure too and am not super fit, healthy baby is most important thing & my DH loves me however I am, but I don't think there is anything wrong with wanting to minimise the physical effects of pregnancy if you can! My DM put on a lot of weight with me & spent most of her life being unhappy and hiding away despite a very supportive husband. I don't want to feel the same way :-/
OP isn't talking about something that could be harmful to her or to the baby, so why the judgement?

Lexiindisguise Fri 10-Aug-12 10:23:12

A few weeks even blush

Whirliwig72 Fri 10-Aug-12 10:26:48

I wouldn't be without my flabby/ flappy tummy - I can entertain my boys for hours with it. They love patting it, sucking it and blowing big raspberries on it. grin Good on you for wanting to be svelte if that makes you happy but don't beat yourself up if your tummy doesn't spring back to washboard straight away.

BlueMoon74 Fri 10-Aug-12 10:27:33

I don't think it's sad that you want to regain your body after childbirth as best as you can...I think it's just the way it has come across as though you feel you owe it to your husband!

Frankly, you're creating life. Who gives a toss really if your stomach, thighs, boobs whatever are not as they were before you did this amazing thing?! I'm nearly 27weeks pregnant. I have always have an amazing stomach - best feature. smile I'm not worrying at all about how it's going to look afterwards because hopefully, if we are blessed, we will pop out a healthy baby and be absolutely overjoyed with this. We lost a baby last year. This put things into a whole new perspective I'm afraid. So long as my baby girl is healthy, I really couldn't give a shit about hurrying to get my amazing stomach back!!!!!!!!

Neither could my DH. He loves me, not my amazing stomach or body or whatever!!! Of course, I have every aspiration to get back into the best shape that I can naturally through eating sensibly and exercise, but I am a woman who will have just given birth.

And neither should you. At 27 weeks I'm worrying about whether my baby will survive until term and come out healthy. Then I'm worrying about feeding her (hoping to breastfeed, but scared about it!) and how we will cope with the massive adjustment to our lives...

Meanwhile...you are worrying about your flat stomach?! hmm

exexe Fri 10-Aug-12 10:28:00

The thing about belly binding is not just getting your figure back but its excellent support for your body post birth and good for your posture, especially if you're breastfeeding.

My stomach was flatter than it had ever been about 2 years after having DS as I continued to swim regularly while pregnant, breastfed him for 15 months (love the breastfeed and eat cake diet grin) and did gentle exercise after his birth, starting with a walk with the buggy round the village every day to eventually getting back into running long distances. It maybe took longer than belly wrapping or using a corset or whatever, but I felt bloody fit. Now pg with DC2 and will do the same again to get back in shape afterwards.

strangerintheday Fri 10-Aug-12 10:34:27

i have done absolutely nothing, never dieted past my 20s (well, i breastfed if it counts) and i was back to pre-pg weight a week later and pre-pg shape a month later. i am well into my 40s

some are just luckier than others

aries24 Fri 10-Aug-12 10:35:12

Thanks ladies, feel a bit better now smile

BalloonSlayer Fri 10-Aug-12 10:36:29

I think it's the finger-wagging superiority of the OP that has got this thread the replies it has.

The OP has not had a baby yet but is telling, yes TELLING a very large parenting website, full of women who actually have had babies, that:

- generally most women lose their flat tummys after [childbirth]

- no amount of gyming and losing weight gets it exactly the way it was

- belly wrapping IS the way to stop this.

She adds spurious claims:

- it pushes the womb right back into place which doesn't happen naturally

- it restores stretch marks by 50%

And implies that a post-pregnant stomach is unattractive. There is an undertone of "Ugh! I don't want to end up looking like you lot."

Add into the mix a level of exclamation marks inappropriate for a 15 year old and you have an OP that has got something to bring out the viper in everyone.

If the OP had read.

"Call me shallow but I am 25 weeks pg and worried about what having a baby will do to my stomach. A friend of mine has a fab flat stomach and said it is down to belly-wrapping. Has anyone tried it, or even heard of it? What do they think?"

they would have probably got an entirely different set of answers.

strangerintheday Fri 10-Aug-12 10:43:57

baloon smile

strangerintheday Fri 10-Aug-12 10:44:47

or even balloon

WoodlandHills Fri 10-Aug-12 10:45:13

Yes, exactly what BalloonSlayer said.

And the bit about her dh marrying "her body" really made me hmm and feel quite sad....might be repeating myself here blush

I agree that it is the tone of posts (including a post completely in bold) which has influence the tone of replies.

Personally as a scientist I find it really annoying when scientifically inaccurate info is presented as fact (greenpeace tried to tell me that the rainforest was essential for penicillin last week buy that's an aside)...

Personally...the definition of natural is without aid.

I would also like to point out that your womb shrinks to its normal size because of hormones...(which is helped by bf)...not wrapping.
Your womb moves to the correct position because it shrinks...deep in your pelvis, there is no way that any clothing/corset/whatever can push it into the correct position because the correct position is so low (and would need to travel downwards not inwards IYSWIM).

And your comments about you wanting your husband to look at you and not sexy mags is shallow. Personally if you are worried about that you also need to worry about your pelvic floor and vaginal anatomy post pregnancy and post birth...cos you presumably want your dh to be having sex with you and not a younger childless model!

(btw you can help retain and regain strong vaginal muscles with excercise...the same is true for your stomach!)

Personally its not for me, as a scientist it looks like either a) tradition for those that live in parts of the world where it is practised and B) a money making scheme for areas of the world where it is not.

(i do see value in the support offered by the belt linked above, but not in regaining the sexy body in the way presented by the op)

Xpost will balloon who has overlapped the content of my post and said it much better than me smile

addictedisback Fri 10-Aug-12 10:55:37

Balloon got it in one along with the dh comment.

Only4theOlympics Fri 10-Aug-12 10:56:11

<wanders in> <mentions c sections> <whistles> < wanders back out again>

MrsHoarder Fri 10-Aug-12 11:10:29

Also, I can't imagine those things are good the pelvic floor. A slightly too tight pair poof yoga pants had me worried about my stitches, something intended to squeeze the abdomen doesn't bare thinking about.

MrsHoarder Fri 10-Aug-12 11:11:27

Sorry about typos, on my phone.

Funnywonder Fri 10-Aug-12 11:28:52

Just thought I'd stick my tuppence worth in. I had my first child at 41 and wasn't exactly fit and toned beforehand, but as a few others here have mentioned, breastfeeding can make a huge difference to how you look afterwards. I was a size 14 pre pregnancy and after a couple of months of breastfeeding was a size 10. I hadn't really thought or cared what I would look like once my baby was born .... but, call me vain, I didn't half get a buzz out of buying size 10 clothes .... and it gave me an excuse (as if I needed one) to get all evangelical about breastfeeding. Some people responded more positively to the weightloss it caused than any of my, erm, lectures about perfect nourishment and strong immune systems. I didn't have a lot of support for my decision to breastfeed unfortunately, so ended up feeling I needed to defend myself a lot of the time.

Anyway, all that aside - if you want to look good, aries, there's nothing wrong with that. You might find it matters a little less once your baby's here. I think the slagging off you've had is unfair. Good luck.

DigestivesWithPhiladelphia Fri 10-Aug-12 11:30:45

Aries, thank you for sharing something you like you look of. There's nothing wrong with wanting to reclaim your body after being pregnant or with wanting to be in shape so that you feel sexy for your husband, yourself or anyone else.

Don't take any notice of the posters who seem offended by the very idea of wanting to look good after becoming a mother. Some women are happier when make an effort with their appearance & others are just as happy to slop about in oversized fleeces and crocs with their hair scraped back on frizzy bun type things... I see a fair amount of those at the school gates and I do inwardly shudder to myself when I look at them &#128513;

I had something similar to that belly wrap that I started wearing about a week after my last c-section. I didn't wear it for 40 days and nights but I did find it helpful. My uterus does take a bit longer to go down after birth (this has been confirmed by my midwife) and I liked wearing the wrap when I was out and about because it stopped the awkward conversations where people assumed I was still pregnant. I definitely noticed that the puffiness around my stomach was going down at the end of each day & friends also commented on the fact that my tummy had disappeared more quickly than the first time.

I also liked wearing the wrap because it gave me support (as my stomach muscles had separated and I had a hernia) and made me stand up straight- which is important after a c-section. It wasn't uncomfortable, it really helped me not to slouch forward over the scar.

Anyway, each to their own, I hope you have a smooth pregnancy &#128515;

PandaWatch Fri 10-Aug-12 11:32:42

It's not as if the OP said her DH married her for her body - she said she wants to maintain the body she had when she got married.

I don't see why it's such a crime against women to want to look good for your partner.

PandaWatch Fri 10-Aug-12 11:35:49

And implies that a post-pregnant stomach is unattractive. There is an undertone of "Ugh! I don't want to end up looking like you lot."

That's quite a leap. Why does the OP wanting to get her flat stomach back have to equal a personal attack on those who aren't as bothered?

PandaWatch Fri 10-Aug-12 11:37:59

Although I would say OP that it is possible to get a completely flat stomach after pregnancy. My two sisters with DCs are flat as pancakes envy

exexe Fri 10-Aug-12 11:38:05

I just read it as the Op found out something, was excited about it and wanted to share.
I didn't think she came across all superior at all.

It's that written word interpretation issue again.

LesleyPumpshaft Fri 10-Aug-12 11:43:12

Why does everyone think rhey will end up with a big flabby belly and stretch marks?

I have 3 little stretch marks after having DS and I was back in my jeans after about 6 weeks. No dieting or strange wrapping was required, I went for walks pushing DS in pram and just ate normally.

Scarredbutnotbroken Fri 10-Aug-12 11:46:26

Hi op - im very interested as post dd1 I hated my body do much I cried often about it. I will be checking this out and no there's nothing wrong with wanting to look nice. I'm not opressed I'm
Single. I'm a woman and I have needs and how I look is part of my identity.
Those posts on fb etc about starch marks being tiger stripes and something to be proud of can fuck off as far as I'm concerned.

DigestivesWithPhiladelphia Fri 10-Aug-12 11:51:46

As for the post-pregnancy stomach being unattractive - it IS!! Let's be serious, is there anyone who genuinely likes the way their stomach looks in the weeks after giving birth?! You can be a great mum, be happily bonding with your baby and still look in the mirror and think "Good Lord, my body looks absolutely horrendous at the moment!".

To the poster that gave the lecture about "I'm just hoping for a healthy pregnancy blah blah" and called the OP "shallow" - do get over yourself! Thinking about her post-birth body doesn't mean the OP is a crap mother who doesn't care if her baby is healthy. It's not a competition, where the fattest, most unkempt person wins the 'best mother' award...

CakeBump Fri 10-Aug-12 11:55:13

^ and this

iMoniker Fri 10-Aug-12 11:56:46

Different strokes and all of that...

Pregnancy and childbirth is treated very differently in South Africa. I have had 2 in the UK and 1 in SA. The CS rate in private hospitals is greater than 90%. I was turned away by two OB's on account of the fact that I refused a CS. I had dd in one of the busiest wards in Cape Town - she was the only "old fashioned" birth on the ward the day she was born.

No accounting for cultural mores...

BalloonSlayer Fri 10-Aug-12 12:02:47

Post-pregnancy stomach is not necessarily the same as immediately post-natal stomach, which is what you appear to be talking about, Digestives. I would agree with you that the immediately post-natal stomach can be a distressing sight for the owner.

The OP appears to be talking about mothers with older babies as she writes: "And no amount of gyming and losing weight gets it exactly the way it was(I've seen this in many as work at a nursery school)" - suggesting she has been watching mothers and deciding she does not want to look like them.

Incidentally, my stomach is not bad at all, even when naked. I have had 3 DCs and have no stretchmarks. I think it is luck TBH.

aries24 Fri 10-Aug-12 12:04:20

DigestivesWithPhiladelphia well said

ahopskipandafurryone Fri 10-Aug-12 12:38:24

My uterus went back into position all by itself within a few days because I was breastfeeding so not sure why anyone would need to bind their tummy for that to happen.

There is nothing wrong with wanting to look nice, but I find it slightly depresssing that rather than celebrate the fact that our bodies have just managed to create a new life, there is so much emphasis placed on aesthetics, getting back into pre-pregnancy shape and looking nice for our husbands/ partners as quickly as we can.

In the days following birth I loved my rounded deflated tummy, and saw it as a badge of honour for what I'd managed to achieve, possibly slightly influenced by having being in hospital for induction and being wildly envious of those that had already had their babies or it could have been the drugs.

Sure I didn't want to stay that way forever, but what is wrong with sensible eating and exercise to acheive this? So I have the same level of scepticism towards this as I do towards most quick fixes for our physical problems. They just pile on the pressure for instant perfection, which is generally a quest that ends in dissatisfaction and misery.

opalescent Fri 10-Aug-12 12:49:06

Digestiveswithphiladelphia excellent post.
Some of the replies on this thread are unbearably patronising & 'Holier-than-thou'.
The OP is an adult, who does not need to be told that her perceptions of 'what is beautiful' are wrong, or that she is worrying about the wrong things, and that her focus should be on the health of her baby. Yawwwwn.
I am pregnant, and am worried about how my body will fare throughout. I am worried about adjusting to changes to my figure, and how this will make me feel with regards to my (completely loving and not at all superficial) partner.
I think that's pretty normal.
I do not consider myself to be a silly, image obsessed person, whose priorities are out of kilter.

sammyleh Fri 10-Aug-12 12:56:42

aries I can see exactly where you're coming from, and funnily enough, my Nanna (70 years young) told me a similar method she practised when she had her children. She had 4 children and still has a lovely flat stomach.
Like you, I'd love to get back to my pre-pregnancy figure... I'm a bit of an extreme sports nut and do all kinds of active stuff which has in turn given me a pretty good bod which I'm proud to show off. Last thing I want to do is buy a new wardrobe and wetsuit - its expensive! I didn't find your post offensive at all, I was quite happy to read of another mum-to-be telling of how she's going to get back to fitness and flatness, its nice to hear that you're inspired to do so. I certainly am.

sarahpip Fri 10-Aug-12 14:54:59

Here, here! Agree with last two posts - poor OP....

Seems there is quite a lot of anger in this thread - no need for some of the comments - it's like a playground full of mean girls - my cortisol levels feel sky high just from reading this thread - not good for a pregnant woman at all!!!

If the belly binding makes you feel better - and you want to give it a go - go for it. And for those that don't feel the need for a flat tum, or aren't interested in belly binding, well...don't go for it, and if you want to argue the case against, do it in an intellectual manner, rather than some of the quite horrid comments on here.

(tongue in cheek) - I'm actually amazed some of the more venomous posters here talked anyone into getting them pregnant in the first place! wink

I've said too much....

PicklesThePottyMouthedParrot Fri 10-Aug-12 17:13:37

I love all this patronising talk of celebrating your body. Must remember to have a party for my piles next time confused

PicklesThePottyMouthedParrot Fri 10-Aug-12 17:20:42

And ffs she is only going to wear a wrap. Not starve herself or start on crystal meth.

What's the worse that can happen apart from a sweaty crack?

This thread is bloody ridiculous.

panicnotanymore Fri 10-Aug-12 18:34:28

This thread is hilarious. Let's just run through some of the 'acceptable' things we do here, obviously for ourselves, because heaven forbid we might be trying to look nice for anyone else:

Dying hair, plucking, waxing, threading, shaving, foundation, make up, weird elimination diets forgoing entire food groups like carbs/dairy/gluten, Trinny and Suzanna style spanx pants, sweating it out in the gym, sweating it out in the Sauna, fasting, detoxing, liquids diets, baby food diets, cabbage soup diets..... ???? All of a sudden a bit of belly binding seems quite innocuous.

BlueMoon74 Fri 10-Aug-12 18:58:53

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PicklesThePottyMouthedParrot Fri 10-Aug-12 19:32:25

What an absolutely horrible post blue moon. Disgusting.

WoodlandHills Fri 10-Aug-12 19:34:16

Blue moon that post is awful sad

exexe Fri 10-Aug-12 19:39:43

Bluemoon of course everyone hopes for a healthy baby but that doesn't stop people perusing buggies, thinking of colour schemes for nurseries, how they want to feed, how mauch maternity leave to take and yes how to get back into shape.

I'm ordering a ton of things for when my baby is here including a post pregnancy pilates dvd and that belly binder thing.
That doesn't mean that I don't worry every day about my baby. I get panicked because I think I haven't felt movement all afternoon. I've been stressed out because of a worry about toxoplasmosis and now I'm worried about GD.

You don't think thoughts in isolation of other thoughts!

aries24 Fri 10-Aug-12 19:42:51

You know screw some of you nasty women. A happy content person usually doesn't feel the need to be so judgemental and self serving, so whatevers making you unhappy don't take out your hormones and isecurities on me! So many of you have looked to deeply in what I 'might' of been saying! I don't resent women with flabby tummys it doesn't change their soul inside. So what if want to look sexy before I reach older age! And personally I don't want to influence my DD one day that is ok not care about your body! Your body is your temple and part of who you are! Self respect comes from the inside and the outside! As for DH! He deserves a sexy wife because he really is the best sweetest loyal man I've ever known. Really shame on all you haters and negative nancys, someone or something obviously has affected you in the past because the general human race can't be as ugly as that can it???

DigestivesWithPhiladelphia Fri 10-Aug-12 19:45:21

BlueMoon - I am really sorry that you lost a baby and I am assuming that your anger is coming from that loss.

I was pointing out in my post, that it is unfair to say the OP isn't concerned for her own baby's health. Of course she is.

Women don't lose babies because their priorities are wrong (okay, we'll ignore the obvious examples for a second, such as drug addicts). It's something sad that happens and is usually completely out of our control.

Please don't take your anger out on a woman who is having a happy pregnancy and who is thinking about all the ways her life will be different afterwards. Again, I am sorry for your loss and sorry that you are upset.

PicklesThePottyMouthedParrot Fri 10-Aug-12 19:54:47

I hadn't realised you lost a baby blue moon , I can understand why for you your only concern is a healthy pregnancy.

I am sure that for all if us here that are pregnant having a safe and heathly pregnancy is by far the most important thing, by millions of miles.

But we all have trivial thoughts.

It was the insinuation in your post that in some way the op should feel guilty if anything happened because she had given some thought to her post baby belly that I really didn't like.

ahopskipandafurryone Fri 10-Aug-12 21:33:13

The thing is Aries women generally are under enormous amounts of pressure to bounce back from pregnancy to physical perfection as if nothing has happened, we're constantly bombarded with tales of how minor celebs loose their baby weight before they are out of hospital. it's exhausting and the perpetuation of this unrealistic ideal gets a lot of women's backs up.

Growing and giving birth to babies is pretty much the biggest physical challenge any of us will have to face, and at the end of that amazing process we're basically given the message that our bodies are no longer good enough and that our husband's will no longer fancy us unless we take action pretty quickly. Sorry but I just have one big fuck off to say to that attitude. I'm thankful for my bodies ability to have children, I look at DS in awe that I managed to create life. I also want to feel like taking a little time to physically recover isn't because I'm lazy or I've let myself go, it's because it's what my body needs from me.

Wanting to get back into good physical condition isn't a bad thing, but your initial post was factually incorrect, your preconceived ideas of the post pregnancy body are a little insulting and your notion that after you've going to the trouble of presenting him with a child your husband deserves a wife with a flat stomach quick smart should stay in Stepford where it belongs.

PeshwariNaan Fri 10-Aug-12 21:35:48

Hm, sounds like fun. Not.

Don't know about the rest of you, but my tummy has never been 'flat' and somehow DH still found me attractive enough to impregnate...

WoodlandHills Sat 11-Aug-12 08:28:01

<APPLAUDS> ahopskipandafurryone

brilliant post

To the OP - sorry if you feel some posters (including maybe myself) have been a tad harsh. There is nothing wrong with wanting to look your best, but as others have said it was just the way you came across in your first post, your attitude seemed to be very much "pregnancy ruins your body" and "must look good for the DH or he won't fancy me now I have dared to have a baby" iyswim. which is quite insulting to many of us on this thread who have had dc.

FWIW when I was pregnant with my first DC, I was a bit like you, I was young, pretty, skinny, and quite scared of losing my looks and figure, because thats what we seemed to have drummed into us will happen when we have DC. But 6 years and 2 dcs on, I am (ok, erm, not quite as young lol) but I am still pretty, still slim, and yes, DH still fancies me. but the biggest thing of all I am far more accepting of myself and my body. And this is probably because it has achieved the biggest thing any woman can do - grow a baby and bring new life into the world. Yes I have a few stretchmarks, and my tummy is not quite as flat as it was at 25 before I first got PG, but you know what I don't care and I feel sexier than I ever did in my 20's for some reason!

BTW, I also remember 6 years ago being pregnant and shit scared of what would become of my figure, reading similar posts to this one and thinking, what bullshit grin ...but it isn't bullshit, and one day, god willing, you will look back in a few years, you will be a beautiful, proud mum and think, what was i thinking?

Hope this helps Op.x

WoodlandHills Sat 11-Aug-12 08:30:19

Oh, and at the risk of sounding soppy / cheesy, I found that DH seemed to love and fancy me even MORE after I had given birth to his dc. I think many men often gain a whole new love and respect for their partners once they have had their children.

PicklesThePottyMouthedParrot Sat 11-Aug-12 09:52:58

I honestly don't think her intention was to
Insult anyone.

And woodland has just shown that its perfectly possibly to query this without being awful about it.

She has come on here later on and said she dosent think that.

She is talking about her own stomach and her own relationship, not anyone else's.

Maybe people are taking this a bit too personally.

Maria33 Sat 11-Aug-12 10:35:08

I've got 3dcs and after the first 2 my body reovered pretty much fine. Third
pregnancy and delivery really screwed up my tummy and pelvic floor - nothing too major but I now have an irritating recurrence of urinary tract infections etc. Anyway, about a year ago I found an interesting research paper that suggested belly binding for about 3 months post partum, combined with a load of pelvic floor exercises and hundreds of quick fire pulling in of your navel towards your spine punches, most of which could be done while breastfeeding. This would help your core muscles recover and rebind efficiently.

Thing is, youngest dc is now 7 and I still feel like my body has not recovered fully from the final pregnancy. I'm fairly young and fit and want to stay fit and in good shape not because it's attractive but because I function better and with more energy when all my muscles are working at their most efficient. I now realise that a little more time spent on this post-partum would have yielded more effective results. The last thing I thought about immediately after giving birth was exercising but I wish that I had.

So my advice toy you OP (if you care smile) is, enjoy your babies, breastfeeding them and take time with them but ignore the naysayers and do look after your body (and that is a feminist issue). The last thing I worried about post partum was my body cos I thought that I should only worry about my babies. Now I wish I'd taken a little time for my wonderful but overly strained body to help it recover from the exertion of pregnancy and childbirth at the point in time where I could have helped myself heal most effectively.

I thought that it would be frivolous to get someone to hold the baby for ten/twenty mins a day so I could sort out my stomach but, now I think it would have been self loving and wise.

Look after yourself well and then you'll have plenty left to look after everyone else.

Good luck OP!

Maria33 Sat 11-Aug-12 10:37:56

Apologies for misplaced commas. Why do you always spot the errors immediately after posting? grin

BlueMoon74 Sat 11-Aug-12 10:44:12

sad Anger definitely from the loss. It was only a year ago and still feels like yesterday .I spend every single day of this pregnancy worrying and anxious. I feel guilty for buying things (I haven't bought hardly anything, but still) and honestly, yes, I'm probably jealous of women who haven't suffered this pain because you can enjoy your pregnancies! There are an awful lot of us on here who have suffered late losses, and reading posts like this honestly just make me shudder with how immaterial it all is!!!!

So sorry if I've offended anyone. I just honestly honestly believe now that it is shallow to be focusing on your own body image at a time when you should be celebrating the fact that you're creating life. Plenty of time afterwards to worry about that (if that's what you want to focus on, and that of course is entirely your choice smile ) I was far too blunt. I realise that. So sorry. I shouldn't have pushed it quite so far.

But that's why I think the OP is being shallow!

BlueMoon74 Sat 11-Aug-12 10:48:33

Oh. And I've asked for my post to be deleted in case anyone else is offended. I do listen to feedback!

Wishing everyone healthy and successful pregnancies. smile

PicklesThePottyMouthedParrot Sat 11-Aug-12 10:56:25

You too blue moon, I hadn't realised about your loss in my first message or I wouldn't have been so blunt.

In real life, I suppose we would choose our audience somewhat and be a lot more sensitive to people's individual situations but it's impossible on here isn't it.

Wishing you the best too for a very healthy pregnancy.

aries24 Sat 11-Aug-12 14:26:47

BlueMoon74 I understand your loss and pain, I had a miscarridge at 3weeks last year but didn't even know I was PG at the time so I guess the feeling of loss wasn't very strong. But still to still call me shallow is horrid, you don't know who I am inside? How passionate I am about children? How teaching the little ones has enriched my life beyond anything? Quite frankly I'm allowed to worry about my body, its my vessel. And that's not to say I don't worry about my DD! I feel nervous for her all the time!!! Is she going to be prem? Her kicking movements, Downs symdrome(as I chose not to know cause it doenst matter really) and the list carries on. I've got enought care and worry for a truck load lol

Loislane78 Sat 11-Aug-12 15:23:22

I don't know much about belly binding aries so can't offer any advice but if you want to give it a go and it works for you - you go girl!! smile

ladymia Sat 11-Aug-12 15:48:09

aries i have just been looking into this after reading your post. thank you for sharing.

some people care about their appearance and some do not, i for one do care how i look (not because of my DH but because of ME).

good luck with your pregnancy!

BlueMoon74 Sat 11-Aug-12 20:55:14

Having quite an attractive body, the thought of pregnancy has always scared me to the point of non excitment (although I adore children) because generally most women lose their flat tummys afterwards! And no amount of gyming and losing weight gets it exactly the way it was

I thought you were a little shallow based on the above....

I now think a hmm and a biscuit based on this..*I understand your loss and pain, I had a miscarridge at 3weeks last year but didn't even know I was PG at the time*...No really love, you don't. You really don't understand the level of pain and loss. And i can assure you, the bump I still had after losing my baby, and how I was going to regain my lovely flat stomach, was the LAST thing I was thinking about at the time.

In fact, have another biscuit, I'm actually speechless. Still think you are shallow. biscuit

ItsMyLastOne Sat 11-Aug-12 21:38:13

That miscarriage comment was incredibly naive IMO. I had a miscarriage in my first trimester 3 years ago, but I couldn't even begin to imagine how horrendous it would be to lose a child late on, or after birth. That's a completely different situation.
I have worried a lot more during this pregnancy as I know how much I love my DD more than anything, and I couldn't imagine how it would be to have anything but a perfectly healthy baby again at the end of this pregnancy.

However, I don't think anyone should be looked down on for wanting to get their pre pregnancy body back. I think most of us do want a toned figure back if we had it before. Although fwiw, my womb had completely retracted 8 days PP (so it certainly can happen naturally), I had no stretch marks and I had a toned belly pre pregnancy, but I certainly didn't go back to my pre pregnancy body afterwards! I never managed to BF but BFing and exercise are likely to do more IMHO.

aries24 Sun 12-Aug-12 06:40:17

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

ahopskipandafurryone Sun 12-Aug-12 08:50:49

Whilst we're not judging anyone, can I gently point out that not bring overly bothered about a totally flat stomach immeadiately post birth or at any time really does not equal not caring about your appearance, as some posters seem to be claiming.

DigestivesWithPhiladelphia Sun 12-Aug-12 09:13:12

OP, I originally felt sympathetic towards you because you had written a relatively light-hearted post & I didn't feel you deserved some of the nasty responses that you got.

However, your last two posts make you sound sound incredibly childish and really quite vicious. Calling another woman a "bitter bitch" after she has been honest about the pain and anger associated with losing a baby... Do you really think that is acceptable?

I do hope you are lucky enough to have a smooth pregnancy & birth. I'm starting to suspect that the shock of having a baby to look after will distract you from your belly wrapping plans anyway, as you will (hopefully) be growing up fast.

Badgerina Sun 12-Aug-12 09:16:47

Quite aside from the charming debate over whether it's shallow (or even realistic) to want your pre-pregnancy body back, I absolutely FAIL to see how belly wrapping is going to help achieve that goal.

As many people have said, your uterus returns to its original position and size by itself. But it's not your uterus that you need to be fretting over. It's your stomach muscles. There is NO quick fix to regaining a flat stomach. A toned body, like all desirable things in life requires EFFORT. The kind if effort that may not be possible immediately after having a baby.

It'll certainly become a question of priorities, and when you have a young baby to look after, there are no prizes for guessing where your priorities will lie.

I for one intend to do a lot more this time around (after DS2 arrives) to regain pre-pregnancy strength and fitness. I won't be wrapping my belly and expecting things to magically flatten out though. That kind of thinking is completely unhelpful and totally disregards the massive impact that carrying a baby for 9 months has on your body. This over emphasis on a "quick fix" also, to my mind completely misses the point that so many others on this thread have tried to make: that carrying a baby for 9 months, and then giving birth, also has a massive impact on your SOUL.

MB34 Sun 12-Aug-12 10:15:50

I cannot believe how rude and cruel people can be on here. The OP was only trying to point out something that SOME women MAY want to try, if you don't, then fine, ignore it and move onto something that you can be nice about. Everyone has their opinions but if they don't match with yours, there's no need to be vicious about it.

Some people are being really hurtful to aries and as soon as she puts up a fight, she's slated! I just find it totally childish.

When I first found out I was pregnant I came on here posting about how I was scared about my body changing and I had comments in the region of "don't be selfish/stupid/it's not about you anymore" and I felt like a horrible person. I felt my feelings were being trampled on and I felt worthless. In the end I didn't bother replying otherwise it would've turned into something like this thread!

It's so sad that grown women can be so spiteful to other women

MrsPaynie Sun 12-Aug-12 10:22:07

MB34, my feeling exactly. This tread has turned nasty, and very childish! I would like to think the women posting on this board are all parents (or soon to be) and grown women, yet this post has turned into something you would expect to see in a school playground. If you have nothing nice/useful to say, then don't, it's that simple.

milli2512 Sun 12-Aug-12 11:17:01

I saw this thread yesterday when it had not long been posted. Shocked at some of the bitchy comments. Ok this suggestion is not going to be everyones cup of tea, but do you really need to be so nasty about it. Of course a healthy baby is the focus of all of us but I'm sure a large percentage of women post birth think about how their body has changed and how to get back into those favourite pre-pregnancy jeans. Does that make us shallow?? No, I think it makes us normal.

pinkspottycups Sun 12-Aug-12 12:10:22

aries Although I felt that your orginal post might have been somewhat misunderstood by some posters, but judging by your most recent posts I take it all back.

MB34 Actually Aries herself has been horribly judgemental and nothing short of vicious to Bluemoon, she is more than capable and has displayed quite nasty behaviour herself.

Looking back on your posts throughout this thread you come across as nothing short of shallow and lacking in any form of empathy and sensitivity. I sincerely hope that motherhood helps you grow up a bit and see a bit farther than your own nose. In all seriousness I think whether or not your tummy pings back into shape is the least of your worries.

hzgreen Sun 12-Aug-12 13:44:01

blimey, is it me or has this got massively out of hand?

people can offer criticsm or express opinions without getting nasty.

i have come across body binding in a couple of posts, i don't know much about it but i am a bit interested so will look into it more and hopefully make an informed decision. i have plenty to worry about and have the ability to have several considerations on the go at any one time.

my DH couldn't care less if i have a flat stomach but i want to feel nice AND feel that i am attractive to him just the same as he likes to feel attractive to me. so if it's not too much hassle (yes i am quite lazy but also prepared to accept the consequences of that) and safe i might give it a go, if it works great, if not well then i tried.

the health and wellbeing of my baby is paramount but this is a completely separate issue, i don't see that thinking about your post pregnancy body is such a bad thing - i'm also looking forward to having a crisp, cold half pint, getting a decent haircut and digging out some of my old clothes that i haven't seen for a while, because after i've had this baby i'll still be a person in my own right as well as a mother.

I clicked on this to see what on earth belly binding is. Wow! I'm on mums net to get support and see what other people are experiencing. If people don't agree with a topic then they are welcome to ignore it. I love the high horses people seem to be on about this! Maybe you all need to chill out, have a cuppa and get some perspective! It's like the bullying you get in the school playground.
Personally I won't be belly binding as I have a feeling I'll be too overwhelmed with everything else. However am in the school of thought if it feels good, do it! So long as no risk to mum or baby of course!

PandaWatch Mon 13-Aug-12 11:35:24

<goes back to original point>

My GM was talking about this yesterday - she said when she had her first baby at 18 (71 years ago) not only did she get belly bound but all the mums were also instructed to lie on their stomachs for an hour a day to help with the stomach flattening! confused

MissPollysTrolleyed Mon 13-Aug-12 11:54:34

Sounds interesting and thanks for sharing Aries but I know that I would never have the dedication for this in early motherhood. Instead, I'm going to go with the "eat cake and breastfeed" diet recommended by someone above for six months and then hit the gym very hard.

I was on the beach yesterday and it was full of skinny bikini-clad mums so that gave me lots of hope.

ahopskipandafurryone Mon 13-Aug-12 13:25:18

Well Mumsnet is generally a very supportive place, but at the same time if people thinking you're talking bollocks they will tell you, personally that's why I like it smile.

There is nothing wrong with wanting to look after your body and get into good shape post pregnancy but the tone of the OP was just a bit grating, when I first read it I thought it was one of those unsubtle advertising posts. Add in the suggestion that those of us post DC1 are now hopeless causes and the rights of our husbands to wives with flat stomachs, and the implication that if we aren't interested in this we don't care about our appearance and you can see why it kicked off a bit.

bbface Tue 12-Feb-13 18:04:23

Good grief!! I was just looking for some info on post natel belly bands as my stomach muscles were severely separated after my first, and I came across this ridiculous thread. The poor OP posts an upbeat friendly post about some advise she has been given, and the response!!!!

I am always baffled by women who seem so complacent in their marriages / relationships. There is NOTHING wrong with continuing to make an effort for your partner. I repeat, there is NOTHING wrong with wanting tonlook toned, have highlights, wear make up etc.

One particular poster made me chuckle. She sayes that the Op's husband married her body, whereas her husband married a person. Well, I a, pretty sure that in the early days you made an effort for your Dh and he damn well appreciated it!

I do all the above above in terms of looking after myself. Why? For myself and for my DH? FGS I love him, I fancy him rotten, we have been together for 7 years and I want to be with him forever. About to have our second child together and, as far as I know, he still fancies me rotten. I still make a big effort..., at 38 weeks pregnant I am off for a Brazilian tonight (got to admit, I am trembling at the thought!)

No one dreams to criticise people if they decide to kick back and let nature run its course with regard to looks. But god forbid any women wants to actually make an effort for her partner!!

Creamtea1 Tue 12-Feb-13 18:56:45

Why revive this thread after 6 months of inactivity? It was contentious to start off with and now you've spent 10 mins posting a lengthy post which will just revive it. Pointless.

bbface Tue 12-Feb-13 20:52:09

because creamtea, that is the beauty of a chat forum.

Purplecatti Tue 12-Feb-13 22:03:09

Well just to add fuel to the fire in I tried wrapping using a £20 orthopaedic corset off amazon after giving birth and...... it worked. My midwife couldn't believe what I looked like 3 weeks after baby.
I was mainly using it for my back.
I may have just been lucky.

bbface Wed 13-Feb-13 06:11:05

purple, when did you start wearing and how long for in a day?
Do you have a brand name pls?
There must be some truth to it. my NHS physio after my first birth gave me a tube band and advised it should help with bringing together the muscles if supplemented with additional exercise. I hated the tube, but hoping that if i invest in anything a tad swankier it will be more comfy. thanks

Emsyboo Wed 13-Feb-13 06:45:44

Thanks for the information on belly wraps don't get annoyed by people's responses once you have your baby you'll probably be less bothered about your shape as you have a beautiful baby to focus on.
I put on over 4 stone with DS I used to be very fit and when he was born accepted the fact my body would not be the same.
However I enjoy exercise and eat healthily and by the time my DS was 5 months old all the water retention had gone I was breastfeeding, pushing DS everywhere in the pram or carrying him and also started swimming and working out when I could. I didn't just get back to my ore pregnancy weight but the weight I was when I got married.
There are lots of options to get back in shape and being fitter will help running after a toddler smile
At the same time I didn't do it for my looks as went out and bought bigger sizes in clothes as didn't care I did it because I enjoyed it.
Whatever your reasons if you feel happier then this could be a good option so thank you but being a mummy is so rewarding many people really don't care about a bit of a muffin top smile

leannac Wed 13-Feb-13 07:05:47

Ignore all the bitchy comments on here. I can totally understand why you want a lovely body back. Who wouldn't want to look fab again? Sadly I've never been into exercising enough etc to have a flat tummy & certainly don't have time now with a toddler (unless a fab body could arrive with a swish of a magic wand!) but of course I would love to look great. Seriously who would choose to be flabby?? Its less of a priority for most mums to look good (I spent the first few months of dd1's life with often vomit crusted clothes on!) but you really shouldn't be attacked if its still a priority for you.

Plus it was kind of you to try share your tip. Don't let the Bitchy people scare you off mumsnet - think crazy hormones!

Beamae Wed 13-Feb-13 07:22:28

I put on a stone while breastfeeding my twins... Just saying, in case anyone is planning on relying on the cake and boob diet. My sister also put on weight breastfeeding so it must be down to genetics.

SourSweets Wed 13-Feb-13 08:28:37

Oh my god, what is wrong with you people? Being worried about how your body will look after giving birth is a perfectly natural concern to have. It can cause serious anxieties in some women. I for one, will be taking any advice I can get on how to get back into shape after the birth, and this doesn't mean that my husband doesn't value my personality or that I won't be putting any time or effort into my baby.

elsabel Wed 13-Feb-13 11:42:36

Ohhh ladies i am such a huge fan of mumsnet and it has helped me through so really tough times, but when i see bitchiness like some of these comments it disappoints me massively. To be honest i can see it from both sides and think some valid points have been brought up. However i hate to think that aries or anyone else may be put off mumsnet by this as its not what its all about!!!!

A debate is healthy but no need for the flaming!

amirah85 Wed 13-Feb-13 11:55:06

i can't see what's wrong in wanting to get bak in shape after a baby.regarding belly wrapping i did it after both mine(even tho not for as long as i should have)am my belly is still fairly flat(or was,39+3 at the mo :-)

MadameJosephine Wed 13-Feb-13 12:08:18

I can't see how this would work tbh. The uterus will generally return to its normal size and position during the 6 weeks following birth without any intervention. The best thing you can do to avoid a flabby belly is to avoid excessive weight gain during pregnancy but there's no guarantees. Tbh I was just grateful my body could successfully carry and deliver a child, the stretch marks left behind are worth it

PickledInAPearTree Wed 13-Feb-13 12:14:34

Oh god this thread is hideous!

Pics Wed 13-Feb-13 21:46:49

It's really interesting that it is practised in different cultures. It's not for me but feeling happy about ourselves takes all different forms, and some people will be really interested in this and it could be a really positive thing for them.

laward Thu 14-Feb-13 01:45:51

We all have to do what makes us happy.
My Mum made sleep on my tummy to get it as flat as possible as soon as DS was born.
I'd happily wrap my middle...for me, no one else. My husband still loves & fancies me and I may suggest he wraps his middle too!
Ignore the negativity on here & please yourself. I've already bought compression pants to wear ASAP after my c section grin

Purplecatti Thu 14-Feb-13 03:05:43

BB: I bought this one:


It wouldnt do anything for stretched skin. I got separated ab muscles and it gave my back support whilst I waited until I could exercise.

LoveLaughingLots Thu 14-Feb-13 09:32:51

Compressions pants and wraps are all designed to do the same thing. I'm all for them if you want to wear them and if you don't then you don't. Just like everything else in life surely?

ariel Thank you for sharing


DanniiH Fri 15-Feb-13 09:57:54

God some people are so bloody mean!

I have a 3 yr old and still have a wobbly tummy which I hate and I'm now pregnant again so may give this a try afterwards. I think the op was saying she wants to still look good for her husband not that he is demanding that she stays looking the same! It's about feeling attractive and confident and I for one would feel more sexy with a nice flat tummy! It doesn't mean that I wouldn't be looking after my kids, spending time at the gym would take up more time than popping a wrap on yourself after your shower.

Thanks for the tip. x

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