Pregnancy and work

[MrsDoolittle]

Two weeks ago I told my manager that I was pregnant for the second time. I returned to work last September full-time. I really do enjoy work and at the time part-time wasn't a real option.

I didn't really expect my manager to be excited for me as am I aware that my maternity leave will create difficulties to an already over-stretched department. Neither has she children, so I couldn't expect her to understand.

However, I have been surprised at the negativity I have received from the rest of the team. Does anyone else here think it is rude for a colleague to say "Was it planned?" (also voiced by my manager for that matter) and then say "but how are you going to cope financially?". Many have responded with "Again?"
I really do enjoy my work and up until now I have felt supported but I can't help feeling that my work place have taken the line that I am taking a liberty becoming pregnant a second time.
Dh thinks that it is likely I appear to want it all and it is resented by the team.
I don't want this to become a work/life balance debate but I would like to know if anyone out there is in a similar position and what did they do.
The job I have now does have some impact on us as a family because I work so far away form home, but to be honest I don't think I want to carry on making the effort with this kind of attitude.
I'm upset at the moment so maybe I am blowing this out of proportion.

[Norash]

MrsDoolittle, I have not been in this position but I understand how you are feeling.

I think that your husband is right, they ("the team") are probably just envious. And I think their attitude is appaling. I hope that you resolve this in a way that you are happy with.

And you are definately not blowing this out of proportion. Chin up gal, and congratulations

[Thomcat]

i think your 'team' sound like a bunch of tossers. Sorry you got that reaction babes. I'd like to say a MASSIVE congratulations to you, big love - TC xx

[jonquil]

I so sympathise with you. Their attitude is disgraceful. I am in the same position although my bosses and colleagues have been overly nice about it .. although i know that underneath it all they are thinking "bl**dy hell" she's pregnant again and we will be left having extra work to do because of it. At the end of the day, a majority of working women will get pregnant at some time or other - and more than once . I know it's hard, but i would try to ignore it. The women in your team will find themselves in the position in the future and i hope they remember how they reacted to you. Rise above it. Congratulations and indulge in that wonderful feeling of being pregnant and enjoy!!!!

[teuch]

congrats first of all!!

My situation was different but I did experience negativity in the workplace - and I was particularly surprised since it was a women's organisation!

There is no plain answer but I hope that you feel strong enough to challenge these attitudes when they happen to you (and others!)...

I did suggest to our HR officer that our equality policy was updated and circulated!

[MrsDoolittle]

I think the fact the organisation is predominantly female is why I have been surprised.

[dyzzidi]

I'm finding it hard I work in a male environment and keep getting comments like what do you care you will be sat on your arse at home in a few months. They are also refusing to discuss me returning to work and are even having a go at me as in three weeks I am on holiday for two weeks to get married abroad and although this has been booked for two years and is three months before my intended maternity leave I get daily comments on how I am taking the piss.

I smile very nicely and completey ignore them my boss is the worst culprit. Although the other day when i declared to him if he carries on I will speak to the chairman with a member of the union regarding any issues he may have he went very quiet.

[Tabs]

Hey MrsDoolittle - was only asking about you on our Feb thread this morning. Why don't you pop in and catch up with us all. You've not been on for ages, and we're still missing most of your stats!

[MrsDoolittle]

And this is still annoying me today!

Hi Tabs, that thread moves so fast I can't keep up with it!!

[FairyMum]

It's not your fault your colleagues get extra work. It's the company and managers who are responsible for managing the company's work load when people are off sick or on mat leave.