New thread here

dawn if it was me in your situation, I wouldn't do anything for her. She's come to expect help from you and her brother and takes you for granted imho. I do the same with my sisters. I don't bother with them as they'd take the p*ss big time. I still send cards and presents for my nieces and nephews (they've done nothing wrong) and I still see the LO's when I'm visiting.

You can either just stop the help or you can explain to her how you are feeling. If it was me then I'd do both.

HTH.

Off to docs now.......

Now for my shameless x-post rant - I don't do it often put up with it

Sam is 12 weeks old, in that time dp's family have done the following for us:


Did you see anything there? That's because they've done nothing. I have no family anywhere near me. We are relatively new to the area. My best friend has a 10 month and 5 year old. We have NO support network. SIL came around yesterday, as soon as she got in the house she was making excuses up about how much she had to do that day, this included looking after her friends child, her friedn lives a 5 minute walk away from us and SIL visits this friend at least once a week. It was recently dp's birthday, his sister asked him what he wanted (he got cash of me and Sam because he wants a flat screen tv and was short about the amount that we would have spent on a present anyway, he loved that!) DP told her he wanted some cleaning and the lawn mowing, SIL is broke and on benefits this would have cost her nothing. When she came round it was the second time in 12 weeks, dp has been round on numerous occasions to help her out and we've been over at least 6 times to see her during this time. She asked me what dp wanted for a present, she said dp had mentioned 'some rubbish' about wanting some cleaning and the lawn doing. I told her that's exactly what he wants. DP was working locally yesterday and came home for lunch whilst she was here, she asked him again what he wanted and he repeated cleaning and the lawn mowing. SIL then said she couldn't do it this week but could next week - she knows dp is off for 2 weeks next week so dp said not to bother until after the holidays. I think she is hoping he forgets - ^good job he's got a fabulous Tigga with the memory of an elephant to remind him^. I couldn't help myself as she was leaving I mentioned that we were doing this with absolutely no support from anyone it was in response to something she'd said. When SIL had her children she was constantly at her mothers (dp's mum doesn't drive) in the first 6 months of getting nephew home (he was VERY prem) she spent exactly one day at home and couldn't cope. When neice was born she did exactly the same thing and neice was born at full term.

I am SO annoyed at them, not for me for dp. It wouldn't kill his sister to ring up and say I'm coming into your town can I pick you up anything, she knows I'd pay her the money there and then, which reminds me she still owes dp some cash. It's like a kick in the teeth to dp when he will go and help her out but she won't do anything to help him. She's such a selfish person ARGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!

VeryAnnoyedTiggaxx

PS I feel much better having got that off my chest my normal drivel will now resume.

Morning all. Blimey jw I missed all that - that goodness it didn't get worse. Good idea to get it checked out before the weekend. AND I can totally see why you'll be hibernating early - it's just not worth it. I think this hot, sticky weather probably isn't helping - the thunder last night was wild...I mean house-shaking. Let us know what the GP thinks.

tee good that you've spotted the signs - nip it in the bud and all that. Mind you, if I remember correctly you've got understanding of it all previously, which, quite frankly can be a real help. And as the others have said it's so common and also so easily confused with tiredness/hormones etc. Back to Happy Mummy tres soon

dawntigga you know you wanted the no-neck giraffe - it spoke to you - it said "buy me - I'm cute"

RIght - it's chucking it down - definately staying in till I pick up Iris. Cuppa tea me thinks and then chores

jw really glad to hear K got some sleep!

S has taken to nomming on the SNG (Special Needs Giraffe - he has no neck we are experiencing diversity from an early age in our house) so it has wet hoofs. Still better than using mommy as a dummy

WonderingWhyYou'dBuyAGiraffeWithNoNeckTiggaxx

Morning all. Is it bedtime yet??

K is still sleeping this morning which is no surprise as she went from 7am to midnight with 5 minutes shut eye inbetween. I should think she's exhausted. She finally went off around midnight at which point we agreed to cancel the out of hours doctor. We didn't want to wake her up again once we'd settled her. I'm going to phone my GP this morning and get her an appointment today so that the cough isn't lingering and gatherin pace over the weekend.

I think we've all had one of those coughs which starts up as soon as we try and lie down and it's very frustrating. Just have to be extra vigilant with K and her CLD as she doesn't have the lung power to fight it properly.

I've cancelled DS#2's b'day restaurant trip on Sunday for obvious reasons and told them all that's it now, no more going out for me and K. It's gonna be a long way to March!

tee Glad you're seeking help re the depression. Don't let it get a grip. You know all of this anyway though I questioned myself having PND last week but I've had it before and knew that it wasn't it this time. I just have a silly arse of a DH (which you don't and he seems very supportive) Good luck with docs and don't let them mess you about. Mum Power!

Anyway, guess I should catch up on some chores around these parts before I start hassling the GP surgery.

Hopefully catch you all later with some improvement news

morning all

tee after birth of DS1 i had bad PND, was in hospital for it. so when around 32 weeks with DS2, started taking AD, still on it now. when DS2 was born, at 2-3 weeks, i did get panicky and anxious. but it did not get so bad as last time. still on AD now actually. so yes good to get help. i am on escitalopram 5mg per day. still can breastfeed.
good luck let us know what ur GP says. also i was seeing psychologist.

jw how is K?

JW Hope you got some abs sorted and K had a good night

Tee sorry to hear the blues are beginning to hit...personally I couldnt tell if it was because of coming down from such and emotional high, or lingering distress over the loss of my previous baby and my Dad or simple exhaustion (probably all 3!) but I foolishly didnt get help and am only now 19/20 mths later really feeling more 'myself'. You know the symptoms and know the best way to handle it for you ...it is more important to be a happy mum to Adam than struggling fighting it alone.

Morning all.

JW I hope K is doing okay this morning and you've got her some ABs or whatever she needs.

I've managed to sleep all night in our spare room again. I am, however, definitely having some depression. Making an appointment to see my doc ASAP.

Hope everyone managed some sleep last night.

jw let us know how K is doing. Hope she gets a good sleep.