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18 yrs old, pregnant and housing arrangements?(7 Posts)
I've been a lurker of mumsnet for a while now, and just today I've decided to join, well I have been pregnant for 11/12 weeks now!
Not only am I scared to be having a child at such a young age but I'm wondering how it's all going to work. I'm still in college and my boyfriend has just left with no job. I currently live with his family as my family are very religious and do not tolerate sex before marriage especially not a pregnancy, I love his family but they are very over bearing and i do not wish to live there when our child is due.
Does anyone know how I can go about getting council housing and what I do? My boyfriend is currently looking for work but I'd be a lot better off in the future if I finish off my qualification at college.
Also any stories about teenage mothers who managed to do well for themselves would be greatly appreciated!
Thank you all!
Congratulations! I'm not sure that I have any advice to offer, but I disn't want your thread to go unanswered. Have the student services/welfare people at your college been any help? Has your midwife?
Can't answer all the questions but regarding housing you would need to speak to the local council and apply for housing. Also make an appointment at CAB as they can help and go through things with you.
Congratulations on the pregnancy. I would also like to add I had my 1st younger then you and I went off to uni and completed my degree so you will be fine with the right support
I second speaking to cab and the student welfare team.
I fell pregnant younger than you and the student welfare team at the college I went to was fantastic helping me to get housed. They also helped me source childcare and ensured I was on the correct benefits whilst I studied. However that was 15 years ago so they may not give the same level of support.
I'm now 15 years on in a great job that I love and have more children. Making sure I got further qualifications was important to me for my chosen career, it was hard studying full time as well as raising my Dd but it was the best thing I could have done.
Definitely get an appointment with the CAB as they'll be best able to help you work through the system where you live. Make sure you tell them that your parents have kicked you out because you're pregnant and that your boyfriend's parents have let you stay temporarily. Emphasise that they're only letting you stay for a short time. In our area you'd then be offered a place in a mother and baby hostel and be put on the highest priority banding for a house/ground floor flat and be more likely to get somewhere within the year, otherwise you could be on the list for years and still be staying with your boyfriend's family, I've been there and it's incredibly difficult and hard on a relationship.
I was 19 when I had my eldest and had just finished college when I found out I was pregnant. I put uni on hold for a few years and I'm just about to start the last year of my degree and I'm on course for a First. It's been really hard but will be worth it in the end.
Housing all really depends on where you live in the UK, but as other posters have said best to contact your council and seek advice from Citizen's Advice. Some councils are very tough, and may require you to show a letter or eviction from your boyf's parents before they will house you. Sometimes you can claim housing benefit and use this to privately rent, but being a student may effect your entitlement to certain benefits and lots of landlords don't take housing benefit. If you go down the 'emergency' housing route if you 'have to leave' your boyfriends parents, then the council can house you anywhere, and anything temporary can be for a year or longer. This is all based on my experience working with families in London - it's very tough out there. Best of luck!
I was 18 when I had my daughter. I was in college and living with my mum. My boyfriend was working but living 20 minutes away from me with his parents. We decided it was best for us to stay living where we were for the time being as my mum was extremely supportive. We both stayed at each other's house anyway we just had double so our daughter had two homes. I realise that this is not what you will do. I'd also go to citizens advice and they can help you with what help you will be entitled too, housing wise and financially.
I stayed at college and finished my course and they paid for my daughter to attend a nursery of my choice within the hours I was there. (That may be something you can ask about at your college).
My due dates worked out quite nicely with the end of the academic year so my daughter was 6 months when I went back to college full time in the September. She was born prem in March so I popped in to finish bits off when I could before the end of term. I Breast fed her until 1 year along side college, I'd express bottles for when she was at nursery.
I think back now and wonder how I did it all, still finding time to be a proper family living in two separate house with college work on top but at the time I just got on with it. And loved every second!!
You're going to be great!!
I'm now 24 and on pregnancy number 5, although my only living child is my daughter. I have an amazing fiancè, my daughter is polite, bright, funny and just the best! We have our own house and our own business and I am working my way up in a career I completely love. We've done this all ourselves and been teen parents at the same time.
You're going to be completely fine! We're all supermums!
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