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When did you tell your older kids that you're pregnant?

(20 Posts)
Cheby Thu 04-Aug-16 22:36:59

It's very very early days for us so I'm definitely not going to tell DD1 (3.5) yet, but I will need to at some point, obviously.

I was thinking of waiting until we had the scan at 12 weeks and knew all was well, but not sure if I'll need to say something before then (if I'm sick or knackered, last time I was mostly just knackered).

What did everyone else do?

Boogers Thu 04-Aug-16 22:43:58

When I was about 10 weeks with DD, we were sat round the dinner table and DS suddenly out of the blue asked "mum, do you have a baby in your tummy?" H and I just looked at each other and smiled, turned to DS and said "yes". DS had a big grin on his face after that! smile

Boogers Thu 04-Aug-16 22:44:47

I should have said, DS was 5 at the time.

sj257 Thu 04-Aug-16 22:47:07

When I was 6 weeks lol, they are 8 and 9. I felt bad keeping it from them!

Cheby Thu 04-Aug-16 22:47:27

That's lovely. smile They pick things up so easily!
DD told me she had a baby in her tummy the other day, I honestly thought she must have overheard us talking about it, then she produced an empty toilet roll tube from up her top and said 'look it's popped out'. 😂 I think it was probably just a normal game rather than her picking up on anything.

Cheby Thu 04-Aug-16 22:48:31

To complicate things, we figured DD should be the first to know, but we are having a party next week and I'm worried friends will spot my lack of drinking!

SeashellHoarder Thu 04-Aug-16 22:49:50

I told at 10 weeks after a harmony test.
Like boogers my dd (5) had been telling me for 2 weeks "there's a baby in your tummy" this is apparently quite common for older siblings to have an intuition about it.
When I told her there was she ran off crying!
She's happier about the whole thing now

Boogers Thu 04-Aug-16 22:53:46

Cheby say you're taking antibiotics for a mouth abscess (metronidazole if you need the name) and have been told absolutely no alcohol.

It's very cute with your DD! She's going to be a great big sister, and I hope everything goes well for you all smile

Chintaria Thu 04-Aug-16 22:57:04

Told my 6 year old ds when I was 5 weeks as I was so poorly. We had a report back from his teacher at school that he thought I was going to die sad so thought it best to tell him.
I would have loved to have waited as ideally I wanted to know everything was fine at the 12 week scan (which it was thank goodness) but we couldn't wait - was hospitalised by 5+4 so just as well he knew the reason.
Enjoy telling your dd the news, it's such a special thing to do!

HughLauriesStubble Thu 04-Aug-16 23:11:34

I'm 7+5 and today my one year old put her palm on my belly today and whispered 'baby' before breaking into a fit of laughter!

Whatsername17 Fri 05-Aug-16 00:07:11

After the scan. I lost a baby in January. A mmc at 13 weeks but diagnosed at a scan at 11 weeks. The only saving grace was that I'd protected dd (4) from it. We almost told her so many times becsuse we were excited. Im so glad we didnt becuse when the worst happened, she was blissfully unaware and it meant that she didn't suffer any upset. I really would wait if I were you. This time telling her after the scan and giving her a photo was lovely.

Ticketsplease Fri 05-Aug-16 00:30:01

I'm dreading it!
My boys are 10 and 8.
We're waiting until after 12week scan

Cheby Fri 05-Aug-16 07:17:34

I'm so sorry for your loss Whatsername. That's exactly what I'm worried about, I don't know if at 3 she could cope emotionally if I lost a baby. We are going to get the harmony test and scan at 10 weeks so maybe that's a good compromise.

Thanks for the idea about antibiotics Boogers, I don't know why I didn't think of that, I've taken those ones often enough. Plus I have recurrent dental infections and my friends have all heard me moan about that for years so it would probably be believeable.

I'm loving all these intuitive kids though, they really do amaze you!

Trulyamnearanear Fri 05-Aug-16 08:09:49

We're waiting for the all clear from 21 week scan with our 3yo. Previous mc has me cautious and he has little sense of time so will not get he has to wait for it. I'd tell him earlier if he was older or seemed concerned.

SeashellHoarder Fri 05-Aug-16 09:14:08

Truly, that's a great idea if you can. I would have much preferred to wait till 20 week scan.

babyblabber Fri 05-Aug-16 09:50:20

I'd love to wait as long as possible, preferably after my 20 week scan but I also hate the idea of someone letting it slip on front of them so told them at 12 weeks last time. They were 4 & 2.

Am 12+1 with DC4, the others are now 6,4 and 1.5 so we will tell them over the weekend. DD1 who is 4 has asked me 3 times if I have a baby in my tummy in the last month! Like last time, we will let them tell the rest of the family. DS told his swimming teacher last time and shouted it across the carpark when we were meeting friend, he was so excited!

EreniTheFrog Fri 05-Aug-16 10:49:37

I'm going to wait until after the first scan. I feel awful keeping it from them, but I know they are just too young (6 and 5) to keep it a secret from anyone - and if I do mc, there are friends-of-friends and extended family members that I would prefer didn't know.

Strubo Fri 05-Aug-16 11:02:02

I'm desperate to tell my 2 (they are 10 & 6) but my youngest can't hold his water so I'm not telling them until we're ready for everyone to know! I'm almost 6 weeks now I think and will probably wait until my scan.

Shadow1986 Fri 05-Aug-16 11:11:17

We told my 4 yr olds at 12 weeks when we had apicture to show - they wouldn't have understood about keeping quiet or should the pregnancy not have got to 12 weeks.

They did ask a couple of times why my tummy was so big, and did I have a baby in there, I just said 'oh I don't know I'll have to go to the doctors and find out' and they didn't really bring it up again.

Jodie1982 Fri 05-Aug-16 11:31:18

14wks. I put the scan pic in a lovely card addressed to my DC. Saying " Hello Big sisters big brothere, can't wait to meet you and have bug hugs n kisses, hope you love me as much you do each other"
They cried tears of joy. I was so worried that they would be upset about another baby sibling. They can't wait to meet him/her.

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