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missed miscarriage

(5 Posts)
kate2244 Thu 05-May-16 18:20:52

I found out I was pregnant on 19 March. I'd just separated from my partner but after considering carefully I decided to go ahead with the pregnancy. My partner was emotionally abusive but made it clear he was out of the picture. Regardless he told everyone I was pregnant when I was only nine weeks. This made me anxious but was still excited so booked a private scan so I could see baby and have some happiness from this. Private scan showed no heartbeat. I was back in hospital next day to confirm and was then booked in for d&c due to missed miscarriage. I went to hospital alone and underwent op. The next day my partner turned up at house saying he'd changed his mind we should get back together and have a baby. Several days later he changed his mind again. I still have heavy bleeding and cramps ten days later. Nothing to begin with but started a week after op. I now feel horrendous. I wanted my baby but know it's better to be away from him but feel a lot of attachment to him still. I'm 32 and am struggling to come to terms with this. Emotionally I'm a mess tried to go back to work this week but only managed two days and I'm off again. I feel other ppl don't understand what I'm going thru and get bored with my tears. I literally feel like I don't want to wake up each day. Not only did I lose the baby i wanted and dealt with emotional abuse frim the relationship and his abusive texts. He refused to come to hospital saying it would make him squeamish. Anyone had anything similar. I can't sleep at all

jinglebellmel Thu 05-May-16 19:06:15

So sorry Kate. I can't relate to your relationship problems but I found out on Tuesday (should have been 10 weeks) that I'd had a missed miscarriage. Still waiting to miscarry. I'm not surprised you're feeling awful. Do you have any family or friends who can support you so you don't have to go through it alone?

kate2244 Thu 05-May-16 19:33:09

Awww jinglebellmel I'm so sorry for you. Are you waiting to miscarry naturally or are you booked into hospital. So sorry about ur loss. Other ppl don't understand as they don't seem to think it's a "baby" yet but it is. I have my mum but the day I found our she went on hol for three weeks. He made me distance myself from my friends so just plodding om although do have good work friends x

AKP79 Thu 05-May-16 21:59:57

Hi ladies, sorry for your losses. I just want to say that there's a miscarriage page/topic with lots of threads on it which you may find helpful. I had a MMC at Christmas and am now pregnant again, but the ladies on the thread really helped me during some very dark days. Xx

jinglebellmel Thu 05-May-16 22:23:06

Thanks akp79, I did look but couldn't find it, sorry you've been through it too, but congratulations on your pregnancy - I hope it's up eventual for you.

Kate, so sorry that you don't have people around, hopefully you can find some comfort from people here who have been through the same. Could you see your gp for some counselling to help with all you're going through, it might help? The hospital won't book anything until I've had a repeat scan in one week the waiting is hell. Take care of yourself, you will find someone who is man enough to be a father to your child, still plenty of time. I know that doesn't make this loss any less though .

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