my first pregnancy......terrified of everything!!

[kirst134]

I have just found out that i am pregnant with my first baby :) probably about 4/5 weeks. I am excited, but terrified of EVERYTHING! Every time i feel anything in my stomach i don't know if it is right or not. I have been to see my gp they have refered me to the midwife (he wasn't much more help than that!) . Has anyone any advice for me? I feel useless already 😯

[Puffling1985]

Congratulations! Haven't got anything useful to add, except that I can imagine I will feel exactly the same when the time (hopefully) comes!

[MyKingdomForBrie]

Not much more than that the GP could do!

Congratulations and don't worry, it's bad for the baby

[skankingpiglet]

This first bit is just awful. You get your bfp, trot off to the GP all excited, get told to avoid blue cheese and pate, and then... it's weeks until you see your midwife and you feel you've been lost in the system somewhere. Even after that it sometimes feels an age between seeing various HCPs.
There are many things to worry about during pregnancy if you think on it too much. Almost everything is out of your control and as tough as it is just try and trust your body knows what it's doing. "What will be will be" and all that. Each stage brings it's own concerns and even once they are born it doesn't stop so, certainly for me, it was finding a way to try and ignore the worries.
You aren't useless, you are growing a new human Just listen to your body and do what it tells you. Even if that message is a multipack of McCoy's salt and vinegar crisps or an entire bag of Babybels definitely, definitely not guilty
Congratulations

[KaybeeL]

MEEEEEEEE!
Oh I'm so glad I've seen this post! I found out on Sunday that I was pregnant and I really want to be super excited about it but I'm just so scared that something is going to go wrong.

I'm 5 weeks too.

So sorry - no advice but just wanted to say I feel the same, maybe we can stress together!!

X

[kirst134]

Congratulations! Every twinge or feeling i get i'm wondering if it is right! X

[kirst134]

skankingpiglet, thank you! It has only been a week since i went to my doctor so i guess it will be another couple of weeks yet. There is a lot of conflicting info out there too, so says you can eat goats cheese and hard blue cheese others say not. I just feel soooooo unbelieveably tired and keep getting a waves of sickness over me. Not good at work lol (i am a supervisor at a supermarket on a deli counter). I am just trying not to stress and be good and go home on time and rest as much as i can. ☺

[mylaptopismylapdog]

Sounds to me like you'll make a good parent as there are plenty of times you will feel useless but personally I think that is just a sign of how much you care. Congratulations and don't worry you will meet other new parents who also feel useless and you will all get through those times.

[ksuzan1975]

Congratulations!!! I also found out I am pregnant two days ago and it's my first and since I am 41, am scared of every twinge and going to the toilet all the time to just make sure all is well!
I had a miscarriage last year so it's taken us 12 months to get pregnant again so fingers and toes crossed that this bean sticks!!!
Good luck everyone and baby dust to all who are ttc

[KaybeeL]

kirst134 - I'm the same. I have never been so aware of my own body before!!
I am alsoreally tired but also wonder if it's because I've suddenly stopped drinking caffeine too?
Sickness whilst working at a deli counter - oh no!!
I am waiting for the date of my booking in appointment with the midwives - she said it's usually between 8 and 10 weeks so if I can get through the next 3-5 weeks at least I'll have actually seen someone professional. Not sure if that will help but hope so!!
Xx

[KaybeeL]

Ksuzan - I am going to the toilet every hour just to "check".
Sorry to hear about your MMC. Must make it even more stressful.
Do you know how far along you are now?
I have everything crossed for you x

[northdownmummy]

Welcome to motherhood. It's perfectly normal, you may be able to relax a bit once you get to the 12 week scan. Then you'll find new worries, oh and wait till you're cuddling a tiny baby and it all ramps up again.

Be kind to yourself, talk to your partner and stay away from "dr Google"

[ksuzan1975]

Thank you so much for the support and I am 4-5weeks so still a long way before I can start to relax but I will take all your advice and try to chill and listen to my body! Lots of good vibes to you all! xxx

[ksuzan1975]

Trying to resist 'Google' diarrhoea

[goldenpineapple]

Another one here! I got my BFP on Tuesday and don't even have a doctors appointment until next Thursday as they didn't have one before that! I want to see someone NOW! But don't feel its worth using up one of their same day 'emergency' appointments as, really, it isn't one. I'm just impatient.

My boobs hurt, I feel sick (much sympathy for working on a deli counter - imagine that really doesn't help!) , and I've woken at 4am every night since finding out (OK, so thats only 2 nights...!) I don't think it helps that I'm off work this week on 'holiday' so way too much thinking time. And yes, I am also worried about every little feeling and constantly knicker-checking.

Congratulations to all new BFP-ers

[KaybeeL]

I just got my booking in date with the midwife. 1st March so I will be 8wks+3 then.

Goldenpineapple - I didn't even see my GP I was just told to self refer to the midwifes!

Having a letter infront of me makes it even more real! Argh!

[goldenpineapple]

How exciting KaybeeL! Its all very surreal isn't it?! Were you TTC for long?

Its funny how they do it differently everywhere - I asked reception if I could just see the midwife, but no, it seems I have to have an entirely pointless GP appointment first. So tempted to just ring up early tomorrow and get a same day appointment, as I feel like if I wait another week it'll be even longer till the midwife one?! Is that terrible?!

What do you think your due date will be? NHS online calculator gives me 18th October!

[Artioo2]

Congratulations, but it is completely unnecessary to get a same day GP appointment because you're pregnant!! Those appointments are for people who need immediate help, and you taking one will mean someone else doesn't get it. The GP will do nothing apart from pass you on to the midwife, and even then all that happens at the first midwife appointment is a lot of paperwork. They won't even check you physically, there is no rush at this stage. I know it feels weird that you find out this massive thing and then everything goes quiet, but things will get going in a few weeks. :)

I'd recommend getting a nice juicy book about pregnancy with lots of info and pictures of the stages the baby goes through as it grows, I've found being informed about what's going on in there helps with the worry.

[goldenpineapple]

I know you're right Artioo2 I'm just impatient. Plus I suffer with anxiety, which can often manifest in health related things, so I guess that isn't helping. There are some concerns I have about lifting at work too, and I go back on Monday, so I would have liked to have been reassured.

I will wait.

[Artioo2]

Here's a link to an NHS leaflet about lifting when pregnant. From what I've read, no heavy lifting applies more to the later stages of pregnancy. In the early stages the risks are so tiny that the NHS don't officially advise against it.

That said, why not tell your employer confidentially on Monday? Then it's their problem not yours.

[KaybeeL]

Only in our second month of TTC so I feel even more shocked as I was preparing myself for at least 6 months of trying!
How about you?

How annoying that you can't just self refer!
That being said from what j understand most booking in appointments aren't until at least 8 weeks so no matter when you see the gp you prob won't get to the midwife any earlier.

At the moment I am due on 8th October. Seems so far away!

X

[kate7590]

I understand that its so exciting to find out you're pregnant, especially with your first, but theres really no need to rush off to a GP. They can't do anything and just refer you to a midwife at about 10 weeks. A lot of places you can just ring the midwife direct, or speak to GP receptionist who will give you the phone number for the MW in your area. but again, they won't see you until around 10 weeks anyway.
Try not to worry about too much, or you'll send yourself crazy.
Im 18 weeks with my 2nd baby. Had a check in with the MW at 16 weeks now waiting until 25 weeks for the next appointment, so as you can see even when you're right in the middle of pregnancy you don't have to see MWs very often at all.

Congratulations anyway!

[skankingpiglet]

goldenpineapple If you have issues at work regarding lifting it may be worth telling your employer sooner rather than later so they can risk assess your job and make any necessary adjustments. I have a trade which involves a lot of heavy lifting, working at height and chemicals so I told my line manager straight away with my DD (self-employed this time around, so I reported it to myself ). They made some immediate changes and regularly reassessed to make sure everything was appropriate to my stage. You don't have to tell your whole workplace, just the people who matter. I told the rest of the team after my scan.
kirst134 just stick to the NHS websites advice for what is safe to eat. Different countries have different lists and even the NHS is often changing theirs, hence the confusion. Also remember they are guidelines not law so don't beat yourself up if you have a crafty slice of brie or accidentally eat a bit of blue lurking in a salad.

[kirst134]

I feel so much better reading all this knowing it is not just me that keeps 'checking' it still doesn't feel very real yet! I'm the same thou sore boobs, tired, feeling sick and i constantly need to pee! We have told our store manager today and he is being great. Said that they will go with what i want to do (in regards to staying on the counter as opposed to sitting on a till).

[kirst134]

Ps. Congratulations to everyone else too!x

[quitecrunchy]

Congrats to all the new mums-to-be! Try not to worry about the twinges and cramps, they're common. If you haven't checked out the antenatal club boards already that's worth doing - there will be a thread on there for the month you're due.