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bad reactions to news you are pregnant

(24 Posts)
PeppaPigStinks Tue 29-Dec-15 19:31:27

I am pregnant with dc3. It wasn't wholly planned.

I feel like a teenager about telling my parents the exciting news. I think my dad will hit the roof!

Can anyone share any tips with me about telling them.

Mouthfulofquiz Tue 29-Dec-15 19:40:02

I was in exactly the same boat about four months ago.
I sent an email!!! Just to give everyone the chance to get over themselves before I saw them in person. Seeing as I was just chucking up continuously from very early on, I just couldn't have been arsed with snidey remarks as well. It worked very well!

sepa Tue 29-Dec-15 19:43:51

Why do you think your dad will hit the roof? Are you excited by having DC3.
I can't offer advice really as I haven't been in this situation of thinking a parent may disapprove but I think that you should just tell him. I'm sure if he is angry or anything he will appreciate you telling him to his face. I'm sure DC3 will be a very big joy when s/he arrives

lorelei9 Tue 29-Dec-15 19:45:26

Peppa - why will your dad hit the roof? Will you need money or something?

I would do it in person tbh.

Congratulations!

PeppaPigStinks Tue 29-Dec-15 19:51:04

We are excited. It's a welcome surprise as we have been dancing around the third child conversation for months.

I just think they find our two enough ( they provide one day a week childcare for us ... We have offered lots of times to pay for childcare but my mum loves having them - that's a whole other thread shock)

I passed a jokey comment a few weeks ago about wanting more than two children but that dc2 (who is a toddler) has put me off- my dad muttered victor meldrew style about not having any more, that we'd be bringing up kids for the rest of our lives!

I will need to tell them face to face confused

lorelei9 Tue 29-Dec-15 19:53:40

oh I see
well tbh as long as you are not asking them to look after 3, I think it will be okay.

good luck but I think you will find it will be better than you think. Def tell them face to face.

and I'm really glad you're excited - enjoy the anticipation smile

FusionChefGeoff Tue 29-Dec-15 20:02:26

Just make sure you are very clear with body language and words that you are pleased / happy / excited.

Beaming smiles, arms out to receive congrats hugs etc... So they hopefully just go along with all the excitement and 'follow the script'.

Mum, Dad, we've got some amazing news and we are thrilled to let you know that we're going to be having another baby .... Big upwards in volume and excitement level as you get to 'another BABY!!""

But then my parents are very normal and I'm aware that not everyone gets as much support from theirs so appreciate its not always that easy.

Good luck!

MrsMogz Tue 29-Dec-15 20:34:06

I know exactly where you are coming from! I'm not sure I'm even upduffed yet (testing Thursday), and already nervous about the "so, yea.... Urm... So we have some news"!

I was only 19 having our first and we are "just getting our lives back". Both working, money better etc etc.

On the other hand I was an only child and they know full well I hated it, still do.

How far along are you?

It has crossed my mind to use mothers/Father's Day (if it happens by then!) and use DC1+2 with them wearing a t-shirt saying big bro, big sis and waiting to see how long it takes them to notice grin

PeppaPigStinks Tue 29-Dec-15 20:57:03

Thank you.
Mrs MOGS - fingers crossed. I was 12 days late but first positive yesterday

I think I will need to tell them sooner - last time round I had HG.

PeppaPigStinks Tue 29-Dec-15 20:57:57

Mouthfulofquiz- what did you say? Congrats by the way smile

helensburgh Tue 29-Dec-15 21:00:55

Same position a few months ago.
I didn't think I would manage to tell my parents and I'm 40!
Went better than I thought. Got " oh well it's your life"
It will be easier than you think

MrsMogz Tue 29-Dec-15 21:53:26

Congratulations Peppa!
I had what I thought was a BFP Xmas eve then numerous BFNs. So decided to wait til thurs.

You never know we can be in the "grown-women-scared-of-telling-parents" together! grin

You'll be fine. It's the sitting there with the words on the tip of your tongue for ages that's the worst!

hufflebottom Tue 29-Dec-15 22:00:38

I just burst into tears and told my parents about this one.

They are surprisingly more interested in this one than they were with dd which was a disaster.

May09Bump Tue 29-Dec-15 22:00:42

I'm pregnant with 2nd, told Dad and he said you need to watch more TV that month. Due date is same week as DS's birthday.

He was happy about another Grandchild, but thought it was funny to mention we obviously have a happy week. We weren't trying for that week, in fact we have been trying for two years. I wasn't happy about the chat at all.

Kpo58 Tue 29-Dec-15 22:07:16

Don't do a choreographed routine to "Oops! ...I Did It Again"

Its much easier to think up ways you shouldn't tell someone, than to tell them... shock

Personally, I'd wait and tell them at the 12 week mark...

kitkatsfordinner Wed 30-Dec-15 10:27:56

Not much help but I was the same. No reason my parents ( mother) just doesn't like small kids and hates the fact I've left work to have kids. Baby 3, I didn't tell them till 20 + weeks. Didn't need to as live in different country and rarely see them. I felt a lot better after telling them as wasn't hanging over me anymore. Their reactions were not very enthusiastic, but alright. They've moaned a fair amount about the only childcare they have or will ever have to do, looking after the girls whilst I give birth. I think if I ever go for number 4 I'll just not tell them and hire a nanny for a month! 😅

DinoSnores Wed 30-Dec-15 14:00:00

We are in our 30s/40s, own home, good jobs etc, and had been open about our desire to have a few children.

I was pregnant with DC1 within a few months of marriage and SIL's face just fell when we told her. Things were then complicated with DC2 and we lost her in the second trimester. Not long after we had DC3 in what was a difficult pregnancy.

About a year later, we phoned SIL with the happy news that I was expecting again.

There was silence and then in a cold voice, "Is this happy news?"

Now I am pregnant with DC5 (so we'll have 4 at home) and all I hear from PIL/SILs is how hard it is going to be for us!

Mouthfulofquiz Wed 30-Dec-15 16:07:10

Thanks smile
I just said something along the lines of:
Subject line: guess what!?
Main body: hi all! Exciting news from us... Next baby due in April!! We are over the moon. Lots of love, Mouthful.

It worked a treat. I wasn't over the moon at this point... Vomming, in shock etc but fake it till you make it! Really excited now I'm past the halfway mark.

PeppaPigStinks Thu 31-Dec-15 19:09:20

I told my mum- she is happy!

She is going to tell my dad to pre warn him!!

something2say Fri 01-Jan-16 14:13:11

Congratulations on the wonderful news x

NotSpeaking Fri 01-Jan-16 16:05:54

It's your life. Do what you want. They don't have to live it.

PeppaPigStinks Fri 01-Jan-16 19:00:56

Well my mum has dropped the news earlier and my dad just practically ignored me when we popped in quickly to drop something in.

I am gutted.

Mouthfulofquiz Fri 01-Jan-16 19:48:41

I'm sorry to hear that - but your dad is being ridiculous. It's not up to him. Don't even talk to him until he can pull himself together. People don't realise how hurtful they can be do they?
My husbands gran apparently said 'oh why doesn't he tie a knot in it' when she heard about our number 3. (I only found this out from my MIL on Monday!) she may well be in her 90s but I'm still a bit put out.
Have some flowers cake and some more congratulations!

PeppaPigStinks Sat 02-Jan-16 07:04:30

Thanks mouthfulofquiz. I will just steer clear until he has absorbed the information.

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