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Anyone else an emotional disaster?

(8 Posts)
CarShare Wed 29-Jul-15 20:35:45

I'm 13 weeks pregnant with our first and giving my poor other half a hard time. Last night I bollocked him for working too late every night, telling him things would need to change when we have the baby as I don't want to be a single parent. He really doesn't have a choice but to work long hours at the moment and earns more than the lions share of our income. Usually I'm kind and considerate and we rarely argue but lately I have a very short fuse. I worry a lot that I'll not be able to cope with a baby on my own and need reassurance from him that he's not going to leave me (he never would, and I feel pathetic that I need him to say it). I almost feel like a totally different person. I don't think that the exhaustion or insomnia are helping matters- anyone else turned into a complete train-wreck?! Advice very much appreciated!

Cornberry Wed 29-Jul-15 21:31:19

I have the most patient amazing boyfriend and sometimes I find myself being really short and snippy with him and immediately feel guilty, so I just apologise and tell him he's wonderful and I'm grateful and it's not him it's the pregnancy and he seems to understand. Just explain to your OH that sometimes the hormones can make you tetchy but it's not his fault - I'm sure he'll understand as long as you can be reasonable when you've calmed down and show him you know when you're overreacting

beehappybe Wed 29-Jul-15 21:45:04

I have left the room crying and slammed the door the other day when I found out my husband finished off a pack of biscuits that I particularly fancied that day!!! (he was in the room and I did ask him why, oh why did he not even leave me one crying and sobbing!). Of course once I calmed down I felt stupid. He is the most amazing husband I could have ever wished for and didn't deserve it at all. Same as Corberry I try to explain and say nice things in my bright moments. I also encouraged him to read the week by week stuff about pregnancy (or we read it together) so he knows what changes I am going through.

ARV1981 Thu 30-Jul-15 11:08:01

Beehappy, your story made me laugh... sorry!

At around 14 weeks I cried because my husband beat me at scrabble.

It's just the hormones, but it can be upsetting when it's happening and you can't control it!

CarShare Thu 30-Jul-15 11:19:43

Thanks so much ladies- I'm glad it's not just me going slowly insane. Love the biscuit story beehappy- similar situation my end involving a packet of giant choc buttons that disappeared after I got them out of the fridge to have with a brew.
I'll definitely suggest we look at the week by week updates together as it is a struggle and it might help DH to get it all a bit better.
I am trying to be super nice when I'm able so I'll definitely try to keep that up. He was out late for work drinks yesterday and it was lovely having an evening to myself knowing there was no one at home I could upset with my irrational nonsense! Only six months more of craziness to go......!

ACatCalledFang Thu 30-Jul-15 11:24:53

Don't worry - I cried at 33 weeks when I realised the coffee shop gave me the wrong kind of flapjack... poor old DP was a bit bemused!

stupidgirl45 Thu 30-Jul-15 11:38:20

I cry at my OH almost every night and I did last time too LOL - I'm 15wks with no.2!

I think your concerns about managing on your own are viable concerns. It's a stressful time with a new baby and it does change your life. I think most of us just muddle through!

I keep reminding my OH it's just pregnancy hormones and he's pretty chilled about it "you were like this last time" has been said!

Hugs anyway, hang in there x

beehappybe Thu 30-Jul-15 12:19:54

Glad my story could bring out some smiles [smiles]
I have once seen a film (comedy, can't remember what it was) but one scene had stuck: a heavily pregnant woman walks into a fancy party with husband in tow. She farts and he looks around bemused wondering what's the smell. She gives him a serious look and says "IT'S THE BABY!".

I don't know why it stuck but I take it and am using it now-I am not getting bigger, it's the baby getting bigger, I am not having a snack at 11pm-it's the baby being hungry at 11pm...I am not being lazy taking an afternoon nap when the house is a tip, it's the baby doing important things and needs me to rest.
It's a good gentle way to remind DH that despite you maybe not yet looking pregnant you are in fact pregnant and that's the reason you do things you would normally not do.

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