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Work is too stressful - I'm 8 weeks pregnant

(18 Posts)
LilyWasThere Mon 25-May-15 05:53:03

Can you help me make this decision please?

I work in an industry that results in periods of intense pressure before reducing down to almost nothing. I'm about 2 weeks into one of these periods, and it'll last for another month.

In these periods I tend to work almost twice as many hours to get the job done. But this time around, I'm newly pregnant - our first round of IVF was successful �� - and I'm struggling with the nausea and, mainly, the exhaustion.

I can't do my normal hours, let along the double hours I should be doing at this point.

I'm not sleeping as I'm worrying about the amount of work to do and my boss isn't being helpful with getting in some support.

I'd get myself signed off, except that I have an amazing team who have already picked up the slack and not having me there will mean even more work and stress for them.

What would you do?

Ilovenannyplum Mon 25-May-15 06:19:33

Baby comes first. Work comes second.
That's how I felt when I was pregnant.
Your team will understand, you're not being lazy or doing it on purpose, you're growing a person, it's bloody hard work! I found the 2nd trimester much easier than the 1st though

Congratulations smile

GlitzAndGigglesx Mon 25-May-15 06:24:55

Get signed off your welfare is more important. First trimester is a bitch! Congratulations btw

LilyWasThere Mon 25-May-15 06:39:09

Thanks both - you're right, I know. I just needed someone, other than my mum & DH!, to tell me!

Have a scan on Thursday so will see how to go about it then.

Nottalotta Mon 25-May-15 06:41:54

Congratulations!

I found the first trimester just awful. I barely managed normal office hours (in a pretty stressful but normal hours job) In your case I think i would try to get signed off. You have another 32wks to go and you need to rest.

FishWithABicycle Mon 25-May-15 06:51:02

Yes get signed off. Nothing can guarantee a healthy pregnancy but high stress in the first trimester is really not good. Your baby has to come first.

Your employers have to make reasonable adjustments to your working conditions if medically advised. could they move you to a different team which doesn't have this variable workload? Or could something else be changed to make it work?

Skiptonlass Mon 25-May-15 06:55:25

Get signed off. I struggled through severe sickness for a couple of months and I really should have been nowhere near work. I have an incredibly stressful job, a horrible boss who doesn't believe in sick time etc. consequently I ended up in hospital from dehydration and exhaustion.
I have now learned my lesson! If I need to be off later in my pregnancy I will happily take it.
You really do need to take care of yourself. It's a cliche but there you go

mrswishywashy Mon 25-May-15 07:02:16

Similar postion to me. Pregant on first IVF cycle and for first trimester was working 24/5 with a newborn, good thing was I was able to nap when baby slept but I struggled a lot with tiredness and nausea. I'm self employed so really want to ear as much as possible for SMA. I've since turned down a few positions because I knew they would be stressful, for me it's not worth the risk. Hope you're able to work out a solution.

ValancyJane Mon 25-May-15 09:58:37

Definitely get signed off, baby and you come first.

I went to GP last week to tell her I was pregnant, I work as a teacher in a stressful school and had a week off with stress earlier this year for the first time ever in six years (I was one of five in my department of nine that were off, which gives you some idea of how bad things were). After we'd talked about pregnancy, dates etc, she asked about work and told me in no uncertain terms to come back if the stress got too much and they'd sign me off no questions asked as I needed to look after myself. I think you'll find your GP will be really sympathetic.

DimpleHands Mon 25-May-15 10:05:54

I too would get signed off. Extreme stress is not good for you or your baby. This is a very short period in the context of your whole working life so please don't feel bad! The exhaustion should lift at the end of the first trimester.

Please be aware though, in case you are considering taking off a prolonged period of time, that SMP is based on your pay between weeks 17 and 25 (so you don't want to be on statutory sick pay between this time if you can help it).

LilyWasThere Mon 25-May-15 10:41:43

Thanks everyone. It's not made easier by the fact that the last time I had one of these periods, I had an early mc. I know that probably wasn't due to the stress & long hours....but it's not helping my worrying this time around.

I didn't realise that, Dimple - but should be fine once these next 4 weeks are out the way....which will only take me to 12wks.

blowinahoolie Mon 25-May-15 10:59:17

Work can wait, look after yourself first. Your baby is your priority now.

Blackandwhitecat3 Mon 25-May-15 11:08:02

Your health is always more important than work, pregnant or not. This time you have both you and baby to think of. Please don't feel any guilt or shame by putting you and baby first xxxx

contractor6 Mon 25-May-15 15:13:59

I've worked horrendous hours in this pregnancy and resent it now as not had time to enjoy it. Take the time work will always be there, and congratulations on pregnancy flowers

TheEggityOddity Mon 25-May-15 15:20:12

They will all forget about you and your hard work the minute you go on maternity anyway so I wouldn't bust a gut in the months just before. It's just not the right time. Tiredness increases the nausea. Just take the weeks off and they will have to cope. By 12 weeks you'll be feeling much better again and the tiredness won't be as bad.

LilyWasThere Tue 26-May-15 06:29:15

So, after yet another sleepless night, I have a Drs appt this morning. Can't see the point of going through another week of this 'just to make sure'!

Thank you for all your advice and stories x

Nottalotta Tue 26-May-15 06:34:04

I'm 30 + 3. and will be booking in to see GP this week. Was hoping to feel better after a long weekend but the thought of work is filling me with dread.

CuppaSarah Tue 26-May-15 07:44:28

Do get signed off, I am currently 9 weeks and on my second week of being signed off. It's not ideal for my colleagues, but forced, unpaid overtime in a high pressure environment was less than ideal for me.

No one wants to be in the position you're in, but if work won't help reduce the stress, which is a recognised hazard for pregnant women, you have no choice but to take charge and help yourself. Yours and your babies health are all that matters right now.

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