charley has ancephaly

[frankiebuns]

Ok found out I was pregnant big shock as I'm in early stages of menopause got my head around it all went for a early scan as I was cramping and bleeding only to be told bubba has ancephaly gutted. I have 2 children 4 and 9 months my mum has accepted it but refuses to say his name instinct tells me a boy and I'm exactly like in was with ds I have to go for a d and e soon so scared should I tell the kids qheb they are older?

[ReallyTired]

I am sorry you have lost your baby. You know your children best and what they should be told. I hope you are getting plenty of real life support at this difficult time.

[dottiemad]

So sorry. You will know when the time is right to tell them. lots of hugs and strength xxx

[bakingtins]

So sorry you will lose your baby frankie There is lots of support available on the miscarriage/pregnancy loss board in Body and Soul.
Does your 4 year old know you are pregnant? If not, I think I'd keep quiet at the moment and then see how you feel as they get older.
I've had 4 first trimester miscarriages and opted not to tell my children, oldest was 6 when the last one happened. He has a friend who had a stillborn sibling, so he knows not all pregnancies result in a live baby, but I don't want to burden him with the loss.

[frankiebuns]

My eldest is autistic and very matter of fact I have to travel to have my surgery in 2 weeks I want to bring him home and not leave him in a incinerator bag will they let me?! Hubby wants to bring him home too and is quite upset about it all

[TantrumsAndBalloons]

We lost a baby to anacephaly and we had a funeral for her (it was not confirmed she was a girl as it was too soon but I was sure)
So your baby won't be left in an incinerator bag, you should be able to plan a funeral

[frankiebuns]

Tantrums and balloons can i ask how many weeks you were when you found out

[TantrumsAndBalloons]

14 weeks

[frankiebuns]

Ill be 8 weeks by their dates but that can't be right by my dates i will be 11weeks ish when the procedure is done but im hormonal upset and trying.to hold it together for the kids my mum doesnt understand and I try see seems to think she's the only one attached to the baby now she's having a go at how I handle my autistic son I spend time with the kids.playing so no housework gets done she n wingers don't do anything I then do housework she then says I'm ignoring the.kids think I'm hormonal

[frankiebuns]

Todays the day and i dont want to i hope they do another scan and see theres nothing wrong as ive become so attached and even my husband has i feel im on my own as my mum kinda feels its my mistake as it was a whoops and has ceased the sympathy .

[whatbecomesofsnow]

Frankiebuns I have no experience of this but couldn't read and run, I know I'm just a stranger on an internet site but I'm thinking of you and your family today unmumsnety hugs

[frankiebuns]

Thankyou sat in a hospital 40 miles from home on my own sweating panicing trying not to be sick and trying not to run crying from the room. Havent had a scan yet hoping to just to make sure of everything scared witless and just need my husband

[PterodactylTeaParty]

Oh Frankie I am so sorry. And so sorry that your mum is being so unhelpful as well. You have every right to tell her to stop being so bloody horrible and give you some sympathy and support at such a tough time.

And it is not your fault whatever she thinks. Nothing you did could have caused this.