A question for those of you with more than one child

[Ficidy]

I'd just like to know from those of you who found out what you were having on one (or more) pregnancy, but didn't on another, what was the best for you? We are expecting our second child. We found out what we were having at our 20 week scan with our ds. I don't want to find out what we're having this time, but my husband does. He says he is impatient to know. I'd just like to hear about other people's experiences. What did you like more?

[melmo26]

We didn't find out with our first 3, the fourth we found out for practice reasons.

I liked not knowing and for us the sheer excitement and anticipation of not knowing made it feel more special. Dh loved being the first to see what sex the baby was first too.

With the fourth we only found out as we needed to know what size house we needed. All four were girls

Hope you can work this out between you but for me not knowing was way more exciting

[Jenni2legs]

I didn't with my first but did with next two as it's a way to communicate what's about to happen to young children. 'Your sister will sleep in the moses basket' etc..

[Justusemyname]

Didn't find out with one and two but did with three. Only reason was there was something wrong with the baby and we wanted to have something nice to go home with.

[2boys2girls]

Found out with 1st two and didn't with last two, not knowing is the best its frustratingly strange but wow the surprise was amazing, not overly convinced on the whole finding out for practical reasons as A mistakes are often made and B with my last I had neutral colours agreed bordering boyish but by time out I'd been given the stereotypical pink/blue stuff

[secondtimeprego]

Found out both times. First just had to know. Second I wanted a surprise but my partner wanted to know! He basically let me make the decision considering I'm the one going through physical side of the pregnancy but I chose to find out for him because it made it a bit more exciting for him and allowed him to feel more involved in the pregnancy!

[didireallysaythat]

Didn't with DS1 but did for DS2. I wanted a girl and finding out I was having a boy at 20 weeks meant by the time I gave birth I had completely come to terms with it, and didn't have a sense of disappointment.

[MrTumblesBavarianFanbase]

I wanted to know for DC2 and 3 in order to get older DC used to and comfortable with what was happening - the fewer surprises the better with toddlers and young children.

Mind you I've never been able to get my head around why anyone needs a gender surprise to make having a baby special or exciting. .. a new human comes out of your belly and you're both ok - pretty much the most exciting thing that can happen to an individual human, not looking to see whether or not said living human who hasn't been seen by the naked eye ever before has a willy or not :o

[Ficidy]

secondtimeprego and didireallysaythat, those are the two reasons why I am considering finding out - he wants to know and truth be told, I'd really love a girl this time. I am totally convinced I'm having a boy though, so I'm trying to get my head around that without having to have it confirmed by the sonographer - so it'll still be a bit of a surprise. I'll be happy with either sex to be honest, but it'd be lovely to have a little girl even though a little boy would be a great pal for my ds. Ah, it's a tough decision. We still have a few weeks left before we have to decide whether to find out.

[Ficidy]

Good point MrTumbles!!

[123rd]

Wasn't an option finding out with dc1so not an issue but by the time DC can along I/we didn't want to spoil the surprise etc.

[morethanpotatoprints]

Didn't want to know with first - boy
Wanted to know with second, but hospital policy not to tell - boy
Asked for third- girl, we'll say no more

[FlossyCat]

Hi Ficidy, we found out first time with DS, my husband really wanted to know and I didn't have a strong preference to know or wait for a surprise. This time I was itching to know, I wanted both boy or girl so knew I'd have mixed feelings whichever it was as I'm unlikely to have more than two. Turns out we are expecting another boy :) I wouldn't say I was disappointed but I did spend a few days getting used to knowing I will probably never have a daughter. For me I'd rather know early to get my head around it then when baby is here, although then I'd probably just be relieved if baby is born healthy. Now im really looking forward to seeing brothers grow up together, we can call bump by his name and talk to DS about his brother. It helps for practical reasons too, as I don't need to worry about buying anything girlie. I don't think knowing takes away any of the wonder of when baby is born, but then I haven't waited so I don't know any different! :)