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Get updates on how your baby develops, your body changes, and what you can expect during each week of your pregnancy by signing up to the Mumsnet Pregnancy Newsletters.

Pregnancy

How do you keep it a secret

26 replies

FeelingBlessed77 · 19/09/2014 08:59

I have just found out I am pregnant, about 4+5 weeks. I just want to shout it from the rooftops and let everyone know.

OP posts:

Report

Only1scoop · 19/09/2014 09:02

Congratulations....

Just share it with MN and keep it secret in RL.

I'm doing the same but very worried as previous pregnancies both Hg so very hard to keep secret in that respect.

LBNM19 · 19/09/2014 09:15

You don't have to keep it a secret unless you want to, i told a few people before my 12 week scan, it's completely personal choice congratulations xx

GailLondon · 19/09/2014 09:22

Congratulations! You must be very excited!

Tell a few close friends if you want to. Tell anyone who you would want to be there and support you if things did go wrong. And yes, chat to us here too!

Redling · 19/09/2014 10:43

I second telling whoever you want to, close friends and family probably rather then the person who sits next to you at work, but it's up to you. Also I had to tell my managers at work at 6 weeks as I was a mess with morning sickness and I needed time off, and pregnancy related sickness doesn't count towards sick days in my work. Also they could keep me away from people! Honestly if keeping it from family and friends makes the first trimester more difficult than it already is, do what you like. You'll know who you'd be able to deal with if something went wrong.

juneavrile · 19/09/2014 11:26

Like others say - you don't' have to keep it quiet. It's really helpful to have some friends to talk (or moan) to if you're going through sickness or to get a bit excited with. You might want to ask them to keep it quiet though - and no facebooking!

TheresLotsOfFarmyardAnimals · 19/09/2014 11:34

I told anyone who I felt I'd want support from if I needed it.

If I were to have another then I would try and keep it quiet until 15+ weeks. It's all anyone talks to you about and 35 weeks is a long time when people my mum know

NeedaDiscoNap · 19/09/2014 11:43

I had to tell a manager at work because of morning sickness, but apart from my DH, mum, dad, brother and sister in law I didn't tell anyone until after my 12 week scan. I'd had a previous miscarriage though so was being extra careful.

I basically had to disappear which made my friends very suspicious - I love a drink so if I had turned up to a night out and remained sober it would have given it away. They all guessed eventually though!

Congratulations on your pregnancy

Kelly1814 · 19/09/2014 11:44

Easily! I told no one until 24 weeks, work at 25. I am good at keeping secrets though

FeelingBlessed77 · 19/09/2014 11:48

I'm just so excited. I want to tell everyone, but also don't in case I jinx it. my other half was on phone to his mum in Australia, and I told him to be quiet about it so now I can't tell anyone either. roll on November. ty for everyone's congratulations and support. x

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britnay · 19/09/2014 13:46

First pregnancy:
I had to tell my manager as soon as I found out as there were certain procedures at work that can't do whilst pregnant (handling certain drugs etc).
My colleagues knew from about 7 weeks as I had horrendous morning sickness and felt (and looked!) like death!
Other than close family, I waiting to tell everyone else after the 12 week scan.

Second pregnancy:
I told manager and close family immediately. Didn't tell anyone else. I had a miscarriage a couple of days before 12 week scan. Thankfully I only had to tell a few people.

Third pregnancy (now!):
Told manager and close family. I haven't had any morning sickness. I'm now 18 weeks and still haven't told anyone else (though I do have quite a visible bump! Thankfully hidden behind loose fitting work clothes) as a lot of my friends seem to be announcing their first pregnancies and I don't want to take any attention from them. I'll probably announce after 20 week scan.

123Jump · 19/09/2014 13:52

I was never able to keep any pregnancies secret, as I develop very big bumps very quickly. It is how I know I'm pregnant-trousers suddenly won't button.

123Jump · 19/09/2014 13:53

Sorry, meant to add, I do think it 'lengthens' a pregnancy though. It seems shorter if you wait until 12 weeks or more.
Congratulations!

DecaffTastesWeird · 19/09/2014 13:55

Congratulations!!!

Agree with the pps who said you don't have to keep it a secret if you don't want to.

FeelingBlessed77 · 06/10/2014 15:33

Have just found out from docs, it is now official. I'm pregnant. so excited, just want to tell everyone I meet.

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ohthegoats · 06/10/2014 15:38

Congratulations!

I loved having the secret... in the end we kept it for ages before telling anyone. Got all Harmony tests and scans etc out of the way, because if anything had been wrong with those, we just wanted them to be our choices rather than having parental input.

Told parents at 17 and 18 weeks, told boss at 20 weeks and rest of work colleagues at 24 weeks. Various friends got told along the way, but until I put a picture on Facebook of me looking massive last week at 40+ weeks pregnant, I don't think all of my friends even knew. Some friends I saw even after 20 weeks didn't guess, so I didn't tell them.

Jaffakake · 06/10/2014 15:42

I told loads of people this time. I figured they'd know if it all went wrong, so what was the point!

BreeVDKamp · 06/10/2014 15:45

Congratulations!!

I told my mum at 7 weeks (a week after I found out) because DH was away and I was freaking myself out because I don't have symptoms. She and my dad are delighted! But I don't want to tell anyone else, I am loving having our own secret! :)

I know how you feel though. It is so exciting! I am 8 weeks and just back from a hen do which included a spa, drinking, and lots of fancy cheese!! Was easier to disguise pregnancy than I was thinking though and it helps that I'm feeling well.

FeelingBlessed77 · 06/10/2014 16:04

I'm 9 weeks tomorrow. so only another couple of weeks to go before we tell people. It was made worse because I had to go to Devon last weekend and stay with my mum, gran and grandad. Very difficult keeping stum

OP posts:

cheshirem2b · 06/10/2014 16:30

Congratulations!
We told parents at about 6 weeks and I also got permission from DH to tell my closest friend who is also expecting but then it was a secret until 12 weeks. It's not easy and up to you who and when you tell.

kusmile · 06/10/2014 17:41

I didn't tell anyone apart from my partner and my sister until after the first scan - I couldn't quite believe it was true until I saw it, and I can be a bit of a pessimist and worried that it could all come to nothing. I'm now 30 weeks and still haven't told loads of people, it's getting a bit awkward

kusmile · 06/10/2014 17:42

oh and ps, congratulations on your pregnancy

avocadotoast · 06/10/2014 18:48

I'm 6/7 weeks and I've told quite a few people as I felt I'd rather have that support there if something does go wrong. I've (we've) told both our sets of parents, and then a few close friends, my sister, and our managers at work. I'm struggling not to let it slip to anyone else though!

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heidibuttons · 06/10/2014 21:35

Congratulations! I am 5 weeks and failing miserably to keep it a secret at the mo. I had a celebratory weekend away with old uni pals and managed to hide it for the first day (beer can filled with water, hiding wine glasses etc....) but got caught out when someone handed me a shot of spirit and everyone started chanting 'drink it!' I ended bursting into tears saying 'Nooooo, I can't!' So, the only people that know at the moment are my DH and 13 random friends and their partners that I only see once a year! Now I am wondering if I should tell my parents too...

plinkyplonks · 06/10/2014 21:42

I personally chose not to keep it a secret from everybody. I told my closest family immediately, my direct line manager and the whole of Mumsnet :D Simply because I needed the support if things went wrong, and also I needed support in work as I was so tired, had morning sickness and was struggling to keep awake on long shifts.

After 12 week scan, I may announce it on FB. :)

Whatever you decide to do, there is no right or wrong time to tell everyone. If your happy keeping it a secret, make sure you make use of Mumsnet and join an anti natal thread where you can chat to other Mums to be due around the same time as you :)

Purplecircle · 06/10/2014 21:47

We told too many people when we found out at 4 weeks then had to text them all with bad news a week later.
Sorry if I'm pissing on chips but we definitely won't tell anyone so early next time, it was heartbreaking and having to tell people made it so much worse

Congrats on your pregnancy, will keep everything crossed for you

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