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Pregnancy

Help specific to pregnancy- worried

7 replies

advice451 · 20/07/2014 19:54

I previously posted last week about what's going on in my life but basically-
My grandma who I was very very close to passed away last Monday after a sudden fall. It was a huge shock. Then on Tuesday my mum took her own life. Which was an even bigger shock. She was so excited for her first grandchild.

I am 21 and I am 22 weeks pregnant.
I know the grief is something I have to come to terms with- but my main focus is that all this pain doesn't affect my poor baby.
I'm already considered high risk due to fainting episodes and low blood preassure.

How can I get help dealing with this which is specific to pregnancy? I am just so so worried my baby can feel my stress and he's all I have left to cling on to at the minute
Also someone mentioned bereavement during pregnancy can lead to PND which has petrified ne

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seasavage · 20/07/2014 19:58

Have you been offered any counselling or bereavement support? Your GP could refer you. Then you'd be able to discuss your fears with someone able to identify your changing mental health?

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advice451 · 20/07/2014 20:00

I spoke to my midwife on the Wednesday which was just 48 hours after I lost them both so I was still in shock as I am now - she gave me details for cruze which is bereavement support but I am scared more on a medical level I guess. Will bereavement teams pick up if I would need more medical attention?

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hlc123 · 20/07/2014 23:48

I am so sorry for your losses. During my first pregnancy I suffered from severe depression and anxiety and was terrified that all the stress would affect my baby but thankfully she was born perfectly healthy and is almost 8 now. I hope you get the support you need during this difficult time.

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EllaBella220 · 21/07/2014 01:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Elekelly · 21/07/2014 07:59

I'm so sorry you're going through such a difficult time, I can't imagine how you must be feeling.

My mum passed away to cancer almost two years ago but it still affects me to this day. My grief comes out in the form of anxiety so it makes everything so much more difficult to deal with. I'm 31 weeks pregnant now and have worried about how my mental health is affecting the baby but all you can do is try and stay as healthy and calm as possible - much easier said than done I know.

Eat healthy, try and sleep as much as you can and when you feel upset or anxious just focus on your little bump and try some breathing/relaxation techniques to maintain your blood pressure etc.

Your baby will be absolutely fine and so lucky to have a strong mum like you. Get as much help as you can from family, friends and also your GP/Midwife. Try not to worry about PND just now but it's good that you're aware of it already.

Sorry I couldn't be more helpful. Take care x

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Mistyautumn · 21/07/2014 08:22

All I can say is that I am so so very sorry for your losses. as others have said, seek professional help for your sake. But don't worry about how it is affecting the baby.

Your baby will be just fine. My dad passed away unexpectedly in may when I was 5 months pg. it hurts like hell and still does but if nothing else baby will be there to remind you to keep eating and looking after yourself at this terrible time. Love and hugs to you and bump xxx

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Peaceloveandbiscuits · 21/07/2014 11:14

I'm so sorry for your losses; what a horrible shock for you :( are your family/partner being ultra supportive irl?
I understand your concerns for your baby, but you need to concentrate on YOU right now. Your baby is fine, tucked up inside, oblivious. The only danger is that you will take less care of yourself (not eating well, not being active, not taking any medication you need, deliberately harming yourself, etc) and that will affect your baby. Be really aware of your mental health and if you feel that you are really struggling, go to A&E or Labour triage to seek help. Cruse are very good too, but they won't be able to help you with pregnancy/medical issues. Poor you, it's an unbelievably sad situation :( best wishes.

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