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Please remind me that it gets better...

(12 Posts)
Hedgehead Wed 30-Apr-14 20:27:31

10 weeks preg. Been in bed 22 out of 24 hours with this sicky exhaustion, acid, heartburn, extreme emotions, forgetfulness, headaches - for three weeks now.

I had so much work on this month. I signed up for a course, but I just cannot do it. I prop the computer up in bed, the light gives me a headache, I barf into a bucket on the side but some of it goes on the keyboard. I can't be bothered to get up and wipe the keys down. I try and be a normal adult but I fall asleep five sentences into an email for the course.

DH leaves me in bed in the morning and joins me in bed at night.

I feel like such a failure. I have so much work to do but I just can't and a little voice inside berates me that I'm being lazy or a waste of space and from here on it only gets worse because at the end I'll have a child and I'll never do this course.

Just looking for some hope...

Lozmatoz Wed 30-Apr-14 20:51:06

It does get better! I'm in my second pregnancy and was so so unwell for 3 months. But now I'm feeling pretty normal. You just have to grit your teeth and wait. Remind yourself what a massive job your body is doing at the moment. What would you say to a friend who was feeling like you are? You're pathetic, lazy and useless? No! Take it easy, look after yourself put things on hold for now. Rest as much as possible and just get through it. You'll get there.

weebairn Wed 30-Apr-14 20:56:41

It does it does it does!!

I spent weeks 5-13 either massively struggling at work, drinking water all the time to try and keep the sickness at bay and crying in the toilets; or at home with toddler - I would pull a mattress through to the front room and lie there with the tv on while she trashed the room. It was awful and I felt so bad about myself.

But it all passed and at 18 weeks I can work more-or-less normally, do loads of fun stuff with the toddler, cook and eat normally again, and even stay up till … well… 9pm! grin

You're not being lazy. It will pass. Hang in there.

ps having a baby is a lot easier than being pregnant in my opinion

minimalistmum Wed 30-Apr-14 21:04:09

I was miserable for the first three months: mainly just exhaustion, but that was unbelievable. Like you, I could just not get out of bed. I had to cancel a lot of work projects and felt terrible about it but then around 14 weeks it suddenly got better: one day I woke up and just felt myself again.
From then on I've been having the most awesome pregnancy ever, so hold on!

Pregnantagain7 Wed 30-Apr-14 21:04:13

It really really really does I promise smile if it's any consolation I found weeks 9 and 10 absolutely fucking horrendous! It slowly started to get better after that I'm now 16 weeks and feel fine a bit tired in the evening but nothing compared to those first twelve weeks.

Another one here who found having a baby easier than being pregnant didn't put me off getting pregnant with a fourth though!
Rest ignore work as much as you can you are ill yes it's caused by pregnancy but if you had the same symptoms without being pregnant no one would expect you to work.

Hope you start to feel better soon smile

weebairn Wed 30-Apr-14 21:06:15

Weeks 9-10 are the worst.

weebairn Wed 30-Apr-14 21:06:37

And 39-40 grin

Thurlow Wed 30-Apr-14 21:08:04

I was truly miserable for a long time (I won't say home long) and my overwhelming memory of ages of pregnancy was that I absolutely hated it.

But! by the last trimester I was skipping around like a spring lamb. It felt so amazing not to be sick, and to be eating decent food again, that I was like a woman reborn. I'd quite happily do the last two months or so again. The only stage of pregnancy I enjoyed was actually being enormous and feeling full of baby. Everything else can sod off!

Hedgehead Wed 30-Apr-14 22:29:17

Thank you thank you thank you.... All I can say is thank you.

Espesh the bit about how 9-10 weeks are the worst...

cake

Gennz Thu 01-May-14 02:57:46

That's music to my ears too hedge I am 9 + 2 at the moment and I feel like grim death. Constantly nauseous and all that temporarily stops it is eating. Today I have had 5 crumpets, 10 plain biscuits, a lemon tart, salmon sushi, miso soup ... and I feel the nausea coming on again. Am going to end up massive sad Also want to go home to sleep but can't as the cleaner is there (first world probelms) so am trapped in my office trying to write a contract while trying not to puke in the bin. /loud childish sobs

SnakeInMyBoots Thu 01-May-14 03:06:48

Hedgehead it does get better. I'm 36 weeks now on DC2 and I can say on both pregnancies weeks 6-17 were absolute and total torture. I was so sick I lost over a stone both times. I was miserable, constantly thinking about food, because I was so starving and dehydrated and couldnt keep anything down. Normal life was impossible. I somehow managed to struggle minute by minute through work, although I know the quality of my work was way below standard.
You will return to normal, hang on in there.

VioletWillow Thu 01-May-14 10:47:50

9 weeks was my worst week! After that it got steadily better and better, the second trimester was an utter joy, no sickness, and not so much tiredness either. Just take it one day at a time, you're growing a person and sometimes you just have to trudge your way through it smile

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