Feel like rubbish every single bloody day ARGGGGHHHHHHH

[Ciwti]

This is a ramble but I literally just feel like rubbish all of the time.

1. I look TERRIBLE! My face is literally like a pizza. I'm only 13 weeks... my face is looking chubby and it's full of rashes no matter what products I use. I'm trying sooooo hard not to scratch but I woke up this morning and I must have clawed myself in my sleep. Oh, not even to mention that my hair looks like I've washed it in a deep fat fryer. FFS, it looks minging and I feel like such a scruff. So I'm getting through serious amounts of coconut oil and foundation just to feel less like a 13 year old with a load of acne!
   

1. Everyone is getting on my nerves and p-ing me off BIG TIME. My dad last night was doing my head in. He has the cheek to tell me what I should and shouldn't name my babies. I'm sorry, but his suggestions are awful. He named my sister and I, we have terrible names. Why should I have to waste my credit whilst he's slagging off my choices?! I tell him this and he starts taking the p- out of my youngest daughter's name, which I think is lovely. He starts talking about some stupid puppet (errm what, I'm not a grandad and I have no idea what he's even talking about) and singing 'Maaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinaaaaaaaaaaa', she's my daughter and it hurts my feelings and he refuses to pack it in and he wonders why I shout at him!
   

Just to dig it, when I told my apparent friend about it, he seemed to think it was HILARIOUS and he keeps picking her up and going 'MAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA'. Errrrrm, if it's annoying when my dad does it, it's as sure as hell to annoy me when he does it.... Don't men have common sense?

1. I just worry something is wrong all of the time. Since I've known it's twins, I cannot stop worrying. Every time I have pains, I think 'oh this is it, I'm going to lose them'. I've known since a scan at 8 weeks and I still feel a bit in shock. I don't even know if I feel happy that it's twins. I expected one baby and to be honest, I'm too young for 3 children, never mind 4. I'm worrying sick about the results of the CVS I had recently, I'm worrying about if there's something wrong. I'm worrying about not being able to feed them properly because I don't eat enough as it is, I'm terrible for it and then when I've had a bad day trying to force more food in, I'm torn between feeling fat and even more disgusting than I already am and feeling guilty because I've not eaten enough. I worry how I'm going to cope, especially with the girls as well. I don't really want to be a single parent of 4 children. I've been in tears over and over and bloody over worrying about everything. I feel like I don't really want to be in this situation, yet I really don't want to lose them. Marina is 5 months in 5 days, and I will have 3 children under 1, which really isn't a relaxing thought. I'm worrying that all of my worrying will cause me to lose them.
   

I guess everyone has their own issues, but other people seem to be able to accept it. I have been thinking of names and stuff to try and stay on the positive side, but then I worry that I'm tempting fate.



Childish and pathetic rant over

[weebigmamma]

My sympathies! I too am the daughter of a spectacularly insensitive father who keeps making comments about me being a 'big lass' and 'carrying it well' etc. He also makes comments about my hair being MUCH more grey than he realised etc. OMG shut UP dad!!!

I am 36 weeks and it is only in the last week that I have begun to feel excited about meeting/ having the baby. Pregnancy can be such an ordeal and you're meant to feel fabulous about it but I reckon loads of people just feel sick and scared the whole time. You've made it to 13 weeks which is brilliant. Allow yourself to feel horrible and try to be as kind to yourself as possible. xxx

[cathpip]

Rant away..... I am having my elcs on the 31st march and I am so pissed off with everybody (baby no 3). As for hair don't condition it, mine has been heavy and oily and yuk, as soon as I stopped the conditioner and only use shampoo it's been looking amazing :). The spots will go! And my identical twin has also just found out she is pregnant with twins, her other dc will be 13 months when the twins arrive :)

[Loopylouu]

Oh you poor thing.

I've been the same all the way through. I have felt like shit (sickness, heartburn, back pain) looked like shit (huge weight gain, spots, horrific hair) and wanted to murder everyone around me every day.

I'm having my section this week. I am hoping not to look and feel like an ogre for much longer.

[Ciwti]

My dad really doesn't have a filter, he says whatever he's thinking and it's usually negative. He tells me how to live my life and has a say on everything. When I went on Skype a few days ago, he said, 'Kelsie, you look chubby and you look a mess'. No wonder I have bloody confidence problems! Aren't pregnant women meant to look a bit chubby? The only reason I didn't before as I was calorie counting with my youngest and I had an eating disorder when I got pregnant with my first. Men, eh?

I've tried different shampoos, using no conditioner, using baby shampoo and just washing it with water. My hair smells vile because it's so greasy, I'm having to put talc in my hair to control it. Hopefully the spots will go, but my pizza face got worse as I hit 20 weeks last time and that was with just the one baby!

My sister has twins who were born in May of last year, then she got pregnant again a month later and had her little boy early last month. Her girls are identical though. She seemed to carry well, no rashy spots and nice hair.

[Ciwti]

Oh, where are my manners? Good luck for your caesarean, cathpip.

Loopylou: I know exactly how you feel. I'm trying to work out if I want to murder everyone around me because I'm feeling like shit, or whether they're causing me to feel like shit.

I look pregnant already, I never looked pregnant so quickly before. I don't feel bloated or anything, I think I actually have a baby bump this early on. I've got a new stretch mark from this pregnancy already. I bet I'll be an elephant by the time I'm due and have a lot of horrendous stretchies!

I don't have heartburn yet, I forgot about the horrendous heartburn I'm yet to experience within my pregnancy. Urggghhhhhhhh!

Oh, good luck for your section!