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26 weeks pregnant and feel really low :(

(23 Posts)
C4ALR Sat 07-Sep-13 13:25:24

It's taken 3 years, hard work, stress and fertility treatment and a miscarriage to get where I am now so why do I feel so rubbish I should feel happy sad.

The last couple of weeks I just wanna cry all the time, don't think my husband understands really so we keep bickering I am sooo tired and suffering with spd, and last few days severe heart burn too, I don't feel like doing anything but then I'm bored if I'm not.

Is this normal to feel like this, at work I seem to be a bit better emotionally but soon as I get home I cry

X

HavantGuard Sat 07-Sep-13 13:31:14

(( Massive hugs ))

You're full of hormones and shattered and in pain. Your DH needs to be supporting you. Just because this is a pregnancy you want very much doesn't mean you feel any better physically right now.

C4ALR Sat 07-Sep-13 13:33:30

He does try but he's a male ha.

Is it just hormonal why I feel low do u think?
Thanks for ur reply

HavantGuard Sat 07-Sep-13 13:38:22

Well ongoing pain and lack of sleep tend to make most people feel low. Hormones can add to that. If you're feeling very low it's worth talking to your GP or midwife about it.

LillyofWinchester Sat 07-Sep-13 13:42:48

Don't underestimate your hormones, it's a pretty overwhelming time. Don't worry about feeling low sometimes, even though you have been through so much to get to this point you can't expect to feel excited and over the moon constantly, despite the fact that everyone else thinks you should be. You are preparing for a big change in your life & reality is always different from the dreams and hopes you had.

Try and give yourself a break and be kind to yourself, rest and try not to worry about the odd outburst of tears. Maybe tell your husband how you are feeling, he no doubt also had dreams about how this time in your life would be and it must be confusing for men to see their wives upset at what should be a happy time. Perhaps talking to him at the right moment may reassure him and also help him support you.

26 weeks is a difficult time if I remember rightly, the birth still seems a long way off but the pregnancy starts to take its toll on your body. I hope you feel a bit better soon, take care

Blondie276 Sat 07-Sep-13 13:51:40

I am 28 weeks now and can totally sympathise with you! I went through a bad few weeks at 24-26 ish. Was in years all the time- feeling really really low for now reason and actually just plain knackered!! Also like you the not so nice bits of pregnancy start rearing their heads so don't feel alone! I'm 28 weeks now and I've been fine the last two weeks so don't loose hope- it's totally normally and it's tiring being pregnant- give yourself some credit ;)

Blondie276 Sat 07-Sep-13 13:52:05

Opps- meant in tears not years!!

working9while5 Sat 07-Sep-13 13:55:15

Do the Edinburgh Postnatal Depression Scale, it has been used in pregnancy too.

Antenatal depression is not that uncommon. What you are describing sounds a lot like it. You have major risk factors with the stress of your history and the current issues with pain.

Interpersonal psychotherapy and CBT are recommended by NICE. I have had 24 sessions CBT over the last year as I had moderate PND.

I am pregnant again and am personally using bright light therapy which involves sitting in front of a 10, 000 lux light box for 60 mins every morning. There's been a number of promising small scale studies on its use in pregnancy and it has no bad side effects. A good quality fish oil like MorDha prenatal is also worth a punt. Yoga can be helpful and they can tailor it to spd too and go at your pace. Things like evening classes in creative things can also give you a different focus and distract you from thinking thinking thinking.

I would also highly recommend Mindfulness. There is a specific mindfulness course for pregnancy and the first year of life available from www.mindfulmotherhood.org. The book Mindful Motherhood by Cassandra Vieten is downloadable on Kindle.

I am using Mindful Birthing by Nancy Bardacke which is based on the 8 week Mindfulness for Stress Reduction courses that help with regular depression and stress yet tailored for birth prep. There is a lot in that about learning to manage pain, fear and uncertainty in pregnancy, birth and beyond.

C4ALR Sat 07-Sep-13 13:55:31

Thanks for all ur support, I just needed to hear it was normal I think and not just from my mum cos they always say what u wanna hear don't they smile

I seem to feel movement all the time and trying to go to sleep is a blooming nightmare keeping me up and he ain't even here yet ha x

C4ALR Sat 07-Sep-13 14:02:01

Just to add to the pain... Iv woke up this morning with a real sharp pain which keeps occurring since I've been up on my right side it does ease off then it comes back so I can't stand up straight, not sure what it is

Blondie276 Sat 07-Sep-13 14:02:28

C4alr- please don't panic! I was off work with depression last year . I'd never had it before and as people can imagine it was a terrible time. I'm fully recovered now and feeling good although when I went though a bad few weeks as I mentioned, my DH kept telling me he was really worried I was going to be ill again and that I won't be able to cope blah blah. That made me feel even worse and actually like he was right! But he was wrong- as so many have mentioned it is so normal to have a bad patch. Our bodies are changing with us having no control, it's not all nice pregnancy symptoms, it's tiring and knowing your life will never be the same again is a lot to take in! Don't beat yourself up- congratulate yourself like I've done and keep smiling - you will have a wonderful bundle soon and I for one can't wait to meet mine now!

C4ALR Sat 07-Sep-13 14:07:55

Il try..! I hope ur ok, I think u just expect urself to cope don't u and actually u can't predict what's going to happen.

I'm worried about getting on people's nerves keep saying oh this hurts or that hurts

C4ALR Sat 07-Sep-13 14:08:24

I can't wait to have my baby born 15th December he is due x

Blondie276 Sat 07-Sep-13 14:14:17

Oh me too! I'm actually getting on my own nerves! Haha. But hang in there- I keep telling myself it's all worth it ( even though at times in not so sure!)
Make sure you look after yourself - we will be fine I promise smile

C4ALR Sat 07-Sep-13 18:00:09

Thank you, wen r u due? smile

Carole803 Sat 07-Sep-13 18:57:32

First of all, big hugs.

I was having a super emotional wee last week to the point that I cried constantly for about 4 hours. My dp could see after about 3.5 hours that I wasn't 'faking' it and gave me a big hug.

He understood even more when I told him I was going to the doctor.

I went to the doc who reassured me I did the right thing,they have taken some bloods (i had to wait a week for that apappointment so still waiting for the results) and was told to check back in with the docs in a rew weeks to see how I was doing. And to pick a suitable doc smile

The doc also told me to let the midwife know I needed to talk about how I was coping so she could allow more time in our appointment, but I haven't done that yet and my appointment is next Thursday.

I promptly went home, put earplugs in and slept for a whole five hours and have done most nights since. I feel much more in control of my emotions, not a 100 percent, but I know my Dp knows I am serious and hugging if I have another breakdown.

if you are feeling low, have a chat with a nice doc or your midwife. It is perfectly natural and you are allowed to blame your hormones, they are very powerful.

C4ALR Sat 07-Sep-13 19:12:51

I don't think I feel so bad that I need to talk to a doctor I don't think, think I'm just over tired, and as people have reassured me think my hormones are playing tricks.

It's good ur dp understands now I don't think some men are very sympathetic are they, especially when u really need them to be.

I hope you are ok, wen are you due?
Hopefully this is just a stage everyone goes through, think its mad to think iv only got 14 weeks left cos some people can't even tell I'm pregnant cos my bump is so small to them but to me I feel huge.

Thanks for your reply x

Carole803 Sat 07-Sep-13 22:23:12

I think it is a phase for most people. I am 24+3 and getting bigger by the second. I am really happy to be pregnant and enjoy every moment (almost) and was not prepared to allow my negative emotions to get in the way of this amazing journey (it sounds hippy tree hugging I know, lol), so I decided to go to the docs to nip it in the bud early on.

I thought I would feel like a numpty explaining how I felt, but honestly, once I got it off my chest, and understood it is quite normal, I had a really good sleep and haven't looked back.

Today I was ablevto watch my very active mini me use me as a trampoline and am more excited than ever.

I think my point is, don't try to handle your feelings on your own, there is too much good stuff going on that you don't want to miss smile

Have a good weekend all.

C4ALR Sat 07-Sep-13 22:54:47

I might leave it a few more days and if I feel no better make an appointment at the doctors, midwife isn't very easy to talk to, nice enough just to the point about stuff.

I don't seem to off got much bigger I obviously have but not overly noticeable to others unless I got right clothes on.

I'm not enjoying pregnancy at all, I can't get use to seeing/feeling baby moving I wanted to enjoy it so much but I'm counting down the weeks till he is here safe and well

Congratulations to you and am really pleased you are now enjoying your pregnancy smile

working9while5 Sun 08-Sep-13 06:33:08

I think you should. It is normal to feel down about things like spd and to have an old weep from time to time, be tired, wishing it was over etc. Usually though at the same time there is excitement, sense of pleasure in the baby's movements etc and generally feelings of wellbeing alongside any discomfort.

It sounds like you are crying a lot, anxious a lot, struggling to feel positive connection to the bump, low mood generally.

Unfortunately antenatal depression is the single biggest predictor of postnatal depression. It's much easier to do things like take time to relax, have a bit of therapy, a massage, do yoga, learn some self-help strategies, take care of yourself now than it will be with a tiny baby. Time spent now to handle this stuff will really pay off. What have you got to lose?

C4ALR Sun 08-Sep-13 17:33:17

Don't get me wrong I don't dislike feeling and seeing him move it just feels weird, I am very excited and in counting down my weeks, pregnancy just isn't wat I imagined I don't think

LillyofWinchester Mon 09-Sep-13 09:25:07

Hey hope you are feeling ok today, one day closer to having the baby in your arms. Do speak to your doctor if you need extra support, that's what they are there for and even just talking it over with the GP might help.

Also maybe prepare yourself a bit for the unknown feelings that will come when the baby is here, I think lots of people assume once they have the baby in their arms they will feel fine and happy, which in a way of course they are, but plenty of women find themselves also feeling really anxious, as babies have a habit of doing stuff to us mums to make us worry, eg not gaining weight enough, too sleepy, not sleeping enough, not feeding etc etc - just knowing that in advance may help when the time comes so if you do start feeling like that then you know it's perfectly normal.

Oh and I'm sure your bump will go through a little growth spurt soon, I can't remember which weeks it is but I'm sure there is a period of 3 weeks near the end when it just grows all of a sudden!

C4ALR Mon 09-Sep-13 12:36:21

Hi, I feel abit better today, I have been to the doctors this morning actually. He didn't seem to worried and said its normal what I am explaining and just to take it easy abit to ease my spd.

98 days till my due date says my pregnancy app, I'm counting down the days smile

Hope u are ok? X

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