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Most unhelpful unsolicited advice/comments while pregnant competition(158 Posts)
Went shopping today and am due in about a month. Only visited two places. Person behind first till decided to tell me how she could still remember the terrible pain of labour from 18 years ago. Person behind second till told me once I had the baby I would never go back to work. Riiiight.
Went out briefly at the weekend and some random posh-looking woman in the street shouted 'oh my God you're enormous'. Fortunately I don't have body issues but I can imagine some people would have gone home and sobbed.
Who else wants to play? What shall we have as a prize for the winner?
Walking around knitting shop, browsing, one hand on bump giving baby an idle stroke as she kicked.
Shop assistant: "Ooh, you mustn't do that!"
Shop assistant: "If you stroke your bump you'll have a spoiled baby"
Me (disinterestedly, while stroking bump more determinedly): "Oh I see..."
A check out lady told me she was in labour for 17 months
And I thought my labour was bad!
Our crazy old lady neighbour asked after the pregnancy the other day, and dp told her the 20 week scan was in a couple of days and we were really excited.
To which she responded:
"You shouldn't have those scan things, it will kill your baby"
Goodness, she doesn't beat around the bush does she?
The comment I got was from a wool shop assistant who also said similar things.
Where were you....????
So nice to see that I'm not the only person who has heard:
Do you know what it's? A boy again... Are you going to try again for a girl?
Your other children will be jealous once the baby is born.
Wauw, you'll have 4 children, you'll be very busy with them. (really? Do you think so? Like it's a bad thing to be busy all day with your kids)
There're also a lot of nice things that people say. But as a pregnant lady you hear so much silly stuff.
People somehow feel that they need to talk to a pregnant lady.
MIL - you can't eat raspberries
Me - why?
MIL - you just can't (as if my life doesn't revolve around googling every food item on my fork!)
Me - I've checked, it's fine.
2 days later...
SIL - texted to say I can't eat raspberries
Me - yes I can
SIL - oh, mum told me to tell you.
Also "finally, you'll be the fat one."
Am 18 weeks pregnant. Last week my Mother in law gave my husband "the expectant father" book for his birthday.
On the front was a post it note which said. "We got you this for Christmas but it didn't work out."
We had a miscarriage at Christmas.
DH whipped it off before I saw it at the time in case I said anything I might regret!
Any time I say I'm tired I get "well of you think you are tired now!"
He will be here soon! (I'm overdue)
Have you had it yet?
I had someone tell me I won't take to breast feeding and she can tell just by looking at me! Thanks!
Are those stretch marks sore? You should try coco butter (I have tried EVERYTHING)
Why do you need a baby monitor? Are you planning on leaving him on his own? (Wtf)
So many stupid comments from the MIL... Including but not limited to 'breast feeding is unnatural!' 'If you breast feed a girl, it'll make her gay!' 'If you breast feed a boy, it'll make him a rapist' 'You're an idiot for not wanting an epidural, think of how DH will suffer if you don't!' 'Have a c/s and get sterilised this time, you shouldn't have any more, Christmas is too expensive for me already!'
So much food related rubbish, including that its not safe to eat soft fruit, or red meat... And I shouldn't do the washing because bending to the washing machine will cripple the baby!!!
I've had hyperemesis throughout this and my first pregnancies. The constant offers of ginger or a dry cracker As if hospital, drips, IV cyclizine, medication and ten weeks off work we're just some hokum and actually what I need is a biscuit
Makes me smile wryly. I'm quite easy going but I get about snappy in pregnancy - I think if just feels like people think you're stupid. It that hated phrase: "have you tried ..." Which gets me most. I was vomiting 30 times a day at one point: I tried everything and still people felt the need to say "ooh have you tried ginger biscuits?"
At work a couple of my colleagues were discussing chocolate cake and I made a harmless comment like "mmmm lovely" and got an attack of....
"You need to start eating healthily now"
"You can't be eating chocolate cake"
"You have to eat lots of spinach"
Ummm I've always had a pretty healthy diet Thankyou very much!!! And actually if I want chocolate cake, I will have chocolate cake!!!
And yes, I need iron, but there is iron in other things other than spinach which I actually can't stand!!
"It's not about what you like or don't like, its about the baby"
Wtf!!!! So I have to eat things that I cannot stand the taste of?!
From my dm shockingly a few weeks insisted that once this ones born i should think about being sterilised now as she think's 5 babies is enough-I was only 9 weeks then!
From mil with my last pregnancy oh if it's a girl, you'll have to send it back to the shop-lovely!
From fil after scan of my last dd, oh great another girl grrrrr, oh well only another grandgirl to add to the 5 we already have
Last pregnancy, a mum at dd3s nursery (38wks) omg i'm sure it's twins, sure they haven't missed one?
"Oh you're due in August? My friend was due in August and it was awful. She was so hot, sweaty and uncomfortable." (She's felt the need to tell me this almost every time I see her).
To which I replied, "Well if it's nice and sunny, I'll relax outside since I'll be on maternity leave." (duh!)
Bodicea I'm so sorry that's probably the most callous thing I have ever heard and so unnecessary.
"Women shouldn't work past 34 weeks because it causes a higher level of stillbirth" said by a nurse at work who knew I was 36 weeks already and working for another two.
Yesterday while walking through shopping centre. ...
Girl on photo shoot stand ' Do you know any expecting parents? ???'
I'm 35 weeks and look every day of it! !!
Yes yes yes with the hypermensis!
'You can't possibly still feel sick' (18 weeks by friend who was glowingly pregnant while I almost passed out, again, in the school playground) .
'Your being sick because your not eating enough' .
Have you tried, rolls off all manner of foods that promptly make me vomit.
'Anti sickness tablets are a very selfish solution to feeling a bit sick, can you not just suck a mint'. If only they were a solution!
I hated onions, garlic in fact anything smelly. So the in laws were cooking LEEK soup and SAUSAGE sandwiches when we went round at 3 pm
'You've got spd because your overweight and unfit'. (I walked 6 miles a day and ran 4 times a week)
'How on earth are you going to give birth to a baby that size when you you can't even walk!' Check out lady this morning in the supermarket while I was trying not to throw up.
'You can't possibly be so sick for so long and now your pelvis hurts, why don't you just get on with it everyone i know has managed!' (My supportive sis who is yet to experience the joys her genetics hold for her when she falls pregnant. My nana, mum and now me have been violently sick with every pregnancy from beginning to end).
'Wow-you're massive! Happy Easter, I'll give you this Easter egg as it has the least calories... ' (2nd line manager)
'Are you sure there's only one in there?'
This thread is great!
Mine is similar to Lj8893, upon taking a second chocolate digestive from the tin at work... "Are you sure you should eat chocolate? Won't that damage the baby?"
For goodness sake!! Only if that's ALL I ate every single dsy of my pregnancy! Why do people think they can comment on everything to do with your life when you're expecting, grrrr.
I started uni when DD was 5mo (had her in my gapyr)
It was much easier than having a kid while working full time I have to say!
Got two degrees, a kick ass career and a lovely 8yo now.
DM for the umpteenth time in both pregnancies -"you can finish sooner though can't you, take some time to indulge yourself."
Erm, yes mum i'm just working for the hell of it really, it has nothing to do with me being the main earner trying to balance our budget for SMP with a toddler and DH who works nights.
cupcake I feel your pain. I constantly get criticised for feeling/being sick at 29 weeks. Apparently it is in my head/I'm being silly/a drama queen etc etc.
Yeah... Several hospital stays, IV fluids, 6 different anti-emetics and losing 4 stone is all in my head...
Said by pie lady in the market when she said 'oo you're big' and I said 'yes, it's twins':
'Ah. It's like my chickens. All the old boilers do double yolkers. It's Nature's last hurrah.'
I did not purchase her pies.
God I could plough the twin furrow. Another classic being 'well, at least if one dies, you've still got a baby left.'
This thread makes me appreciate how lucky I am! Work have been brilliant I get the comments of what people think I am having as we didnt find out the sex of the baby. And I've only had a few comments from people who think I am too small for my 32 weeks but I always say hopefully that means baby will be easier to push out! Baby is growing well but slightly on the slimmer side but then I am petite!
Mil did tell me to make sure I didn't wear high heels in the snow which of course I wouldn't and told me that she would make me something healthy (I had just eaten a homemade stir fry) and she wanted me to eat a sausage sandwich. She's a bit of a feeder so I didn't hold it against her! But she has said that when I am close to my due date I should drink milk with butter in it so the baby slides out! Will be giving that one a miss!
so that's your degree never going to get completed then? (I had just finished my second year so only have one year off. apparently taking a gap year will mean I will never go back)
are you sure you should be eating that? (after half a chocolate biscuit)
you don't like children though do you?
I hope you don't expect me to buy you raspberries all the time. (I had mentioned once that I had a slight craving for raspberries a week ago.)
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