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Pregnancy

When to share pregnancy news.

14 replies

Camdenprincess · 21/04/2013 10:24

Morning all,

This is my first post! so bear with me if its a bit garbled.
I am 12 weeks pregnant with my 2nd baby and have told close family and friends but am not sure when to tell other friends and acquaintances.
My first dd is 17 and it feels like a lifetime ago when I had her and I almost feel like I'm a first time parent again!
Thanks for any advice and I think this will be the first post of many.

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Pants82 · 21/04/2013 11:17

12 weeks is a good time to tell everyone I think. Then they know to give you special treatment and to be understanding if you're knackered/sick/grumpy/getting fat. Congrats! :)

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lexib · 21/04/2013 11:22

I've been wondering the same! Am 12 weeks too, and whilst we're in the midst of telling family I can't work out when to tell everyone else. Not that I don't want to, but have really enjoyed the 'just us' knowing phase, and not sure I fancy all the pregnancy conversations and questions from acquaintances...

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HopefullA · 21/04/2013 12:18

Lexib i feel the same. I am 10 weeks and waiting for the downs scan to be over at 12.5 weeks to tell family. only 2 ppl know.
I want to tell ppl as its exciting but dont want all teh hassle and drama that goes with it as its first grandchild for both sides and i know my MIL will drive me bonkers!!!

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Kelly1814 · 21/04/2013 13:31

I'm 16 weeks and very few people know, work don't. Partly because I can't bear all the fuss, partly as I had a cerclage last week and the doc wasn't hugely positive, would hate to tell then 'un-tell' everyone.

I'm really not a big fuss kind of person and hate the thought of everyone constantly talking and asking about it, this is already happening with some well meaning family members. We must have had something to talk about before I was up the duff!

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Bodicea · 21/04/2013 16:44

I am ten weeks and have already told a lot of friends and close family. I am not superstitious about this sort of thing and have had two MCs which friends have helped me through and everyone knows we are trying so very difficult to hide as people ask me where we are up to and notice if I don't have a drink. I dont see why I should hide it. I told them when i had miscarriages so don't see why I should only give them news when it is bad.

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PinkParsnips · 21/04/2013 17:25

Gosh Kelly I'm glad its not just me, I've been worried that I'm strange as I just dont want to talk about my pregnancy 24/7, I find it very overwhelming.

I've got my 12 week scan on thurs and will probably tell a few more friends then. As for people at work I'd be happy to wait even longer tbh but my line manager knows and I'm feeling a bit of pressure from her to tell the big boss (who has a right mouth on her so once she knows the world will know)

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Lj8893 · 21/04/2013 17:43

We told family straight away and a few close friends soon after. I had to tell my work colleagues pretty soon (about 7 weeks) as I do a lot of lifting and ladder work. We made it public once we had the 12 weeks scan last week!

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beckie90 · 21/04/2013 18:48

I only told everyone at 20wks, dp knew and his mum thats it. But it was horrible not telling people and I wouldn't do it again (even though this is my last) lol. I think 12wks is a good time x

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MoodyDidIt · 21/04/2013 18:48

aww congrats :)

i have told close friends and family quite early on, about 6 weeks, but am not going to broadcast it, ie at work, on fb etc until my first scan which HOPEFULLY should be soon

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Camdenprincess · 21/04/2013 19:36

Thanks for all the replies.
I have had my 12 week scan with Nuchal translucency test so maybe I will hang on till results of that to tell everyone.
Congrats to all above expecting :)

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syl1985 · 22/04/2013 01:13

It's personal when to start telling everyone about the pregnancy.
We always told everyone from the moment we found out.

Some friends and family did ask us why we told everyone straight away. What if you loose it? It's so early.

Our answer:
Because most pregnancy's do continue. The risk is higher to loose your child before the 12th week of pregnancy, but the biggest change of all is that you'll be having a beautiful healthy child in about 9 months time.

Everything can go wrong in life at all times.
All you can do is being careful in life. But I'm not going to be worried or expecting things to go wrong when there's no sign what so ever that something is going wrong with this pregnancy or in any part of my life.

When you loose it it's also nice that everyone knew about it. So that everyone can support you threw that difficult time. Instead of going to friends/family/work, crying your eyes out.

People asking you what's going on and then you need to tell them that you were pregnant and lost it.

You've got a full story to tell on such a terrible moment. But if everyone know about the pregnancy and they see that you're very sad. They can already understand what's happened and immediately give you the support and love that you need on such an awful moment.

That's what we did and our thoughts about it.

Sure it's also ok to wait till you're 12 weeks. You got to do that what you feel most comfortable with.
I don't think there're any right or wrongs / do's and don'ts with this.

Sylvia

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Twinklestarstwinklestars · 22/04/2013 01:35

We told some close friends and my dad around 9 weeks then the ds' after our 12 week scan. We waited until a few weeks later to tell everyone else as we aren't a close family. Some people still don't know and I'm nearly 28 weeks, we haven't put it on fb or anything, we have had a bit of a stressful pregnancy so far so didn't want everyone asking all the time.

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MummyJetsetter · 22/04/2013 11:30

Up to you. 1st time told family at 7 weeks but only waited because mil was on hols when we found out so waited for her to get back, told friends and work later that week. This time we told family at 4 and a half weeks when we got bfp and told friends a few days after that. My theory is that if anything goes wrong you need people's support and their understanding if you're grumpy and snappy for a while. x

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Holly1977 · 22/04/2013 14:07

I'm only 5 weeks but we've told both sets of parents and my best friend. I'll probably tell another 1 or 2 very close friends then will go global once we've had the 12 week scan, or whenever we're as sure as you can be that everything is ok. Having said that, we probably won't be able to keep it quiet and I've had to tell my osteopath, yoga teacher and will probably tell my hairdresser when I go this week. And i told a random stranger in the swimming pool the other day but that doesn't count! I agree with syl1985. The chances are everything will be ok. And if anything does go wrong, I'm sure I'll be telling close friends and family anyway to help me through it so no reason not to really. I'm not superstitious at all, I'm even digging my knitting patterns out tonight which have been put away the whole time we were ttc as I was feeling just too strung out about it all. The main reason I'm holding back from telling more people is that I don't want to get too excited at such an early stage. But it's a totally personal choice, I don' think there's a "right" time, just whatever's right for you.

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